


Sparkler and the Wolf

by RavenCall70



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Boys Kissing, Canon-Typical Violence, Dorian is too hard on himself, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Falling In Love, Fendorian, Fenris as he should be written, Gay Sex, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Love Confessions, M/M, Mutual Pining, Not Canon Compliant, POV Dorian Pavus, POV Fenris (Dragon Age), Sexual Tension, Slow Burn Dorian/Fenris, True Love, awesome dialogue, fenrian, slow burn kinda?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-24
Updated: 2018-07-06
Packaged: 2019-03-08 18:12:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 59
Words: 87,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13463757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RavenCall70/pseuds/RavenCall70
Summary: While in Skyhold, no one is more surprised than Fenris when he finds himself drawn to the mage from Tevinter. In their quest to find love and acceptance, Dorian and Fenris have each been betrayed and disappointed more times than they care to count. When their mutual attraction becomes clear, will they recognize what is standing before them for what it is or remain blinded by their past?





	1. Pursuit

 

 

He'd watched Dorian as he'd fled the library, head down, shoulders hunched, his feet taking him quickly across the ramparts and toward one of the abandoned towers surrounding Skyhold. But that had been two hours ago and he'd not seen the mage since.

What was he doing up there? Why had he fled the library? Was he all right? The last thought jarred him from his musings, his hand tightening on the tankard of ale he held.

When he'd first arrived at Skyhold, he'd been looking for a purpose, a cause beyond killing random slavers. Slashing his way across the Free Marches and Ferelden had become more dangerous with the added threat of Red Templars and Venatori. He'd almost died three times in twice as many days before he realized he might be better off with a bit of help.

Varric had been more than happy to see him, cautioning him about Dorian's presence but with the added caveat he was nothing like his countryman. Fenris had doubted that assessment with his trademark scowl and hadn't been completely wrong in his assumption. Though the Altus was everything a privileged mage from the Imperium appeared to be, he was different.

For one thing, he made no excuses for everything wrong with how the Imperium was run. Nor did he defend anyone who used blood magic or slaves in the quest for more power. But he was naive and blind to just how much slavery kept Tevinter locked in the past and it had led to more than one heated argument between them.

Despite that, Fenris had become fond of the mage. His sharp wit, devilish smile, handsome face and flair for the dramatic was addicting to watch. He enjoyed trading barbs with the Altus and their intense academic discussions in the Herald's Rest. He'd never felt so alive before he'd met the striking mage from Tevinter who'd left everything behind rather than become what he despised. Not even Hawke had affected him as much, and though affect him she had, this was different.

He'd first realized he felt something for the Altus when he'd accompanied the Inquisitor on one of her excursions into the Hissing Wastes. They'd been there to investigate and kill the Venatori who were looking for something to aid Corypheus.

Dorian was his usual self, wielding magic like a dancer or a performer, completely at ease with the magic flowing through him, killing his countrymen with a satisfied smirk. They'd taken down three waves of them when they were unexpectedly ambushed by Red Templars.

His markings had lit up painfully in their presence, the red lyrium in their bodies pulling at him and filling his mind with a maddening song. He managed to kill two of them before he was dwarfed by a Templar grown twenty feet tall, one arm now a massive claw made entirely of lyrium. The Templar had smashed it into the ground beside him, sending up razer sharp shards of lyrium which he couldn't get through. The song had intensified, his markings flaring so bright he couldn't see and he'd heard someone cry his name in fear.

He had no memory of what happened next, but when he could see again, the Templars were dead and everyone was breathing hard. Everyone except Dorian. He'd felt a sharp stab of pain in his chest and was filled with overwhelming concern when he saw both Vivienne and the Inquisitor hovering over the mage's limp form where he lay unconscious in the sand.

He'd never seen the mage injured before or known Dorian to ever be disheveled, so he stared, shocked by his current state. His elegant shawl was torn and bloody, crumpled and twisted about his body. His hair was plastered to his head and stuck up every which way. His staff had been split in half and lay discarded several feet from his outstretched hand. But what had him up and moving to the mage's side, heart hammering in his chest, was that Dorian wasn't moving. He didn't even appear to be breathing and Fenris was terrified.

"What happened? Is Dorian all right?" He'd heard himself demand, eyes riveted to the mage's chest and sighing in relief when he saw it rise.

"He took a severe blow to the head." Vivienne answered, her voice sounding disappointed. "And he overtaxed his mana reserve leaving no way of defending himself."

"Dorian wouldn't do that." Fenris had argued. He'd never seen the Altus falter in battle and always before he'd maintained a steady barrier over everyone.

"He did this time." The Inquisitor had replied, meeting his eyes with a questioning look.

"Why?"

"I assume because he was protecting you. When you became trapped behind the lyrium wall he must have thrown his entire barrier over you. When the other Templar attacked him, he had no mana left to defend himself." Vivienne added, unable to hide her disappointment in her fellow mage.

"You're saying he hit the Templar with his staff?" He asked, incredulous, his mind having a field day of picturing that particular scenario.

"He did." The Inquisitor answered.

"Why would he do that?" Fenris wondered aloud before he could stop himself.

"If I had to guess, it's probably because he likes you Broody." Varric chuckled from behind him.

He'd glared at the dwarf and said no more as the Inquisitor arranged to have Dorian returned to camp to recover. He'd retrieved the mage's staff, not knowing why he did or if Dorian would even want it back. He didn't question what he was doing, nor had he looked closely at what any of it might mean.

Back at Skyhold, Dorian avoided him. After thanking him for retrieving his staff, he'd said no more on the incident and wouldn't meet his eyes when they spoke, his eyes shifting away as though afraid Fenris would see something in them he wouldn't like. But it had been two weeks since Dorian's fall and as much as he tried to ignore his feelings and his promise to let Dorian come to him, he couldn't do it anymore.

Downing the last of his ale, he got to his feet from his perch by the training field, catching a knowing look from the Iron Bull as he did. He scowled at the big oxman, hunching his shoulders as he stalked away to the sound of Bull's deep chuckle, his ears twitching and heat rising in his cheeks.

 


	2. Revelations

Dorian was drunk. He knew he was drunk and he knew it was pointless but right now he didn't care. He was tired of hearing the snide remarks, seeing the suspicious glares and the constant effort required to shrug it all off. But most of all, he was tired of the loneliness. Tired of being a lone voice in a sea of suspicion and derision and he wasn't sure he could do it anymore.

It didn't help that he'd begun to have inappropriate feelings for the elf either. In fact it was downright suicidal to even think of the man in that way. He shuddered to think what the former slave would do with that particular line of thought, especially from him, the evil Magister from Tevinter. He'd tried to ignore it, tried to pretend it was mere fascination over how far Fenris had come and how strong and determined he was. But it had backfired tremendously when the elf had gotten cornered by the Red Templar and Dorian had panicked. Without any thought for himself, he'd surrounded the elf with every once of magical barrier he could conjure, leaving himself defenceless

When he'd woken later back in camp, his head pounding and his staff broken he'd mentally kicked himself. With that one act, he'd alerted everyone in their party to his attraction to Fenris as well as Vivienne's scorn for doing something so blatantly childish.

He sighed heavily as a tear tracked down his cheek. None of this was easy, but the weight of his struggle had become unbearable to carry alone. His meeting with his father had dredged up all the reasons he'd left and reminded him painfully that he had nowhere else to go.

A creak on the stairs behind him had him reaching for a staff that wasn't there, his lips twisting into a snarl, hoping it would be enough to scare whoever it was away.

"Dorian." Fenris said, his eyes roving over him and missing nothing.

"Well that's just perfect. A perfect end to a perfect week. It's not enough for you to needle and insult me at every opportunity? Now you're seeking me out to do it? What have I done this time? Enthralled you? Sacrificed virgins? Roasted live kittens?"

Fenris scowled, though his eyes held something resembling concern. "What's wrong with you?"

Dorian laughed but there was no humour in it and Fenris flinched. What was that about? Dorian wondered. Why would the elf flinch over his choice of words? Had it come out more harsh than the warrior had intended? Unlikely.

"What's wrong with me? Why do you even need to ask? You and everyone else in this blighted freezing country have no trouble listing my many faults and short-comings on a daily basis. A better question would be what's not wrong with me. I'm fairly certain it would turn out to be a much shorter list."

"Dorian." Fenris sighed.

"What? What do you want from me? I'm not insulting you or stealing your chair in the tavern or tossing fireballs at you. You have no good reason for disturbing me or invading my space. I even left the library so I could avoid inconveniencing anyone who might need a book, but who does not enjoy my company, of which I'm certain there are several dozen."

"What in Andraste's name has gotten into you Dorian? What's happened?" Fenris sighed, exasperated.

"Are you trying to convince me you care? That you're concerned about me? Don't bother. I'm not going to be goaded into saying something you'll just use against me later. I might be an entitled noble but I assure you I am not stupid."

"I know you aren't."

"If you're just going to stand there making asinine observations, I'm leaving. I didn't come up here to be harassed, especially not by you. Now get out of my way."

"No." The elf said, crossing his arms over his chest and glaring.

"What do you mean, no? I have nothing more to say and whatever you have to say, I'm not interested. I

don't want to hear how utterly pathetic I am or how my countrymen are the epitome of everything wrong in the world. I've heard it enough already and I'm tired. Now move."

"No."

"Bloody infuriating, glowy... Maker's... kaffas.... elf! Why must you harass me at every turn? I've done nothing to you! Nothing!"

"You've been crying Dorian and by the look of things you've also been drinking."

"What's that to you?" Dorian demanded, pacing before him. "Are you now my mother? Come to point out all my faults and short-comings? Remind me of my duty?" He asked, spitting the last word as though it were poison. "Though that's impossible since you see me, something my mother never did."

Realizing what he'd just said and to who, Dorian's eyes went wide with horror as he clapped a hand over his mouth. His eyes had gone bright and shiny and Fenris was shocked by the change. Dorian was on the verge of tears and terrified at having a witness to his outburst. He took a step forward to which Dorian took two back, unable to mask his obvious fear.

"Keep away from me."

"I will not. You are not yourself."

Dorian laughed mirthlessly. "No? Not drunk? Not a pariah? Not an unwelcome trespasser in a country that doesn't want me? Not an utter disappointment and failure as a magister's only son? To which self are you referring Fenris? For I assure you I am all of those things."

"You are not the strong, confident, charming man I know you to be."

Dorian faltered, his mouth hanging open as he gaped at him in shock. "Did you just pay me a compliment? This is a trick isn't it? A ploy to make me drop my guard."

"No it's not. I am... concerned."

"You? Concerned? About me? No. I don't know what kind of game you're playing but I want no part of it. I'm the brunt of enough jokes as it is."

Fenris sighed, taking another step toward him and dropping his arms to his sides. "You never stop talking do you?"

"Only when I'm sleeping." Dorian retorted, taking another step back from the elf until his back was pressed to the wall. "My voice is my best weapon after all. Keeps the bullies and snide remarks from going too far."

"It also keeps people from getting too close." Fenris added, closing the distance and stepping into Dorian's personal space.

Dorian forgot the witty remark he'd been about to fling as his senses flooded with Fenris' scent. His nostrils flared at the heady, intoxicating smell of musk, fresh air and tart apples. He breathed deep and felt his heart thud in his chest, his palms damp with nervousness.

His mouth went dry as he met the hungry gaze of the warrior before him. "What... what are you doing?"

"Isn't it obvious?"

"No... no you... you can't be. You despise me."

"Did you or did you not almost sacrifice yourself to protect me?"

"I did no such thing." Dorian stammered, feeling heat rise in his cheeks. "I risked myself for a companion in battle, do it all the time. Ask anyone."

"I have." Fenris growled, his voice husky as he placed his hands to the wall on either side of Dorian's head, bracing himself. "You've never done what you did for anyone else but me. No one Dorian. I want to know why."

"Why?" Dorian repeated, his eyes riveted to the warrior' lips as his tongue slid out to moisten them. "I'm sorry. I seem to have forgotten the question." He said, dragging his eyes up to the elf's impossibly stunning green ones.

"Why did you leave yourself defenceless to protect me Dorian?"

"I... because I... kaffas. I didn't, don't want to see you hurt."

"Why?"

"Vishante kaffas! Because I care about you, you bloody, infuriating, stubborn elf. Though why is beyond me, I've never been accused of being logical in my decisions...I..."

His tirade was abruptly cut off when Fenris growled and claimed his lips in a crushing kiss. The press of the elf's soft lips to his own tasted of apples and cinnamon and was so heady and intoxicating, Dorian's legs trembled and he moaned under the elf's exploring tongue.

Fenris' arms dropped, landing on Dorian's sides and pulling him close as he ground their hips together. Dorian's hand threaded through the warrior's hair, marvelling at the softness which reminded him of feathers beneath his fingers. He held Fenris closer as the kiss deepened and a growl rose from the elf's throat as he parted from the mage, his eyes blown wide with lust.

Dorian recovered first, staring at the warrior as though he'd never laid eyes on anything so beautiful before, his breathing ragged. "Maker Fenris, what was that?"

"I couldn't think of a better way get you to shut up."

"So you kiss me?"

"Did it bother you?"

"I... no it didn't bother me, far from it but... I was under the impression you didn't like me."

"That was months ago."

Dorian blinked. "Months? So you're saying you like me now?"

"Is that so hard to believe?" Fenris asked, tracing his finger along Dorian's jaw and drawing a shiver from him.

"No... yes... I, yes it's hard to believe. You hate the Imperium almost as much as you hate mages. I am both of those things."

"I don't hate you Dorian and I don't hate mages."

"I don't believe you and it still doesn't explain why you kissed me."

"I wanted to."

"Ugh! It's like talking to a bloody wall."

Fenris smiled and continued tracing a path down Dorian's jaw with his finger, down his throat and over his collarbone making the mage shiver.

"I like you Dorian. I'd also like to get to know you better."

"Most people ask these things over dinner or drinks or both. They don't kiss them first."

"I'm not most people." Fenris grinned as his hand dipped lower, his fingers tracing a path down the mage's abdomen.

"I've noticed." He said, squirming beneath the heat of the elf's exploring touch. "I don't suppose we could move this to more... comfortable surroundings? Or do you enjoy the allure of broken roofs and destroyed furniture?"

Fenris laughed at some joke he didn't understand. "It has it's appeal. Though you wouldn't need to ask if you'd read Varric's story."

"Kaffas! That was true? I didn't believe it, but you actually lived in an abandoned estate with dead bodies in the halls?"

"I did." He nodded, his roaming hand now cupping Dorian's erection through his breeches.

"Vishante kaffas. Could you not do that right this second?"

"You want me to stop?" He asked, his breath hot on Dorian's ear as he began to suck on the lobe, raising goose bumps on the mage's skin.

"Maker don't you dare... I mean... yes? Please? I would like better surroundings before this goes any further."

"Alright." Fenris agreed, stepping away so suddenly Dorian's heart sank with the loss.

"Kaffas. That... that was not nice what you just did."

"You asked me to stop."

"You're right, I did and now you've made me regret it."

"Change your mind about pampered surroundings?"

"I'd settle for a roof that wasn't open to the sky."

"Your room or mine?" The elf asked cheekily, his eyes dropping to the unmistakable bulge in Dorian's pants.

"Mine." The mage retorted, cheeks flushing. "It's closer."

"Only by twenty feet."

Dorian scowled as he followed Fenris onto the ramparts. "Must you argue with everything I say?"

"I'm not arguing. I'm just stating a fact."

"Sounds like arguing to me." Dorian muttered as Fenris moved ahead of him. "Wait!" He called, making the elven warrior stop and fix him with a hard stare.

"What now?"

"Are you... do you... kaffas. What I'm trying to say is do you want to walk there separately?"

Fenris frowned, a curious look in his eye. "Why? Are you ashamed to be seen with a former slave?"

"What? No! No, I just thought that perhaps you might not want to be seen with me. Exactly."

"It's of no concern. Why? Are you accustomed to being with people who wish to hide it? Or that you believe I think you're good enough to lay with but not be seen with?"

"I..." Dorian's face went bright red and he couldn't meet Fenris' stare. "It's nothing. Forget I asked."

"No." Fenris said, closing the distance between them. He put a hand out, raising Dorian's chin, forcing him to meet his eyes. "Tell me Dorian. Has there been no one who didn't hide you?"

"Festis bei umo caravarum." Dorian muttered.

A frowned marred the warrior's features as he released Dorian's chin. "I have my answer." He said, turning and walking away once more.

"Wait just a damn minute! You do not have my answer. I didn't say anything!" He huffed, hurrying after him.

"You didn't have to." The warrior replied gruffly, noting the Inquisition soldiers who were watching them with interest while they crossed the courtyard. "And unless you wish to cause a scene, I suggest we continue our discussion in private."

"I..." Dorian scowled, his face a mix of conflicting emotions as he realized just how many people were now paying them a lot of attention. "Quite. Yes, lead the way then." He said, ducking his head and following on the elf's heels as they entered the keep.


	3. Resisting Temptation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos keep me going and lets me know all those hits aren't passes. =)

Fenris bypassed Dorian's room in favour of his own, heading straight for the wine he'd brought with him. Dorian leaned his back against the door, watching in silence while Fenris poured two glasses and started a fire in the hearth. Once it was lit, he gestured for Dorian to join him, handing the mage a glass as he took a seat before the fire.

Fenris raised his glass in a silent toast and sipped, his face hidden behind a mask Dorian couldn't read. He returned the look, trying to pretend he hadn't said anything which might have given away the things he held most private.

Dorian sipped his wine and with the first swallow grimaced, frowning at Fenris in confusion. "What kind of wine is this?"

"The kind that's been watered down."

"Watered down? On purpose? Why?"

"I did it for myself. In case I think I need more after visiting the tavern. Or for those who visit and don't need more."

"I imagine it also works on unwanted guests."

Fenris chuckled. "I suppose it would if I ever had unwanted guests."

"So I'm a welcome guest? And yet you still offered me watery wine."

"I think you've had enough already."

"And what would you know about too much?" Dorian snapped, still sipping the wine.

Fenris stared into the fire, his eyes gone distant as though he were staring into a different fire in a different time. "In Kirkwall, when I failed to catch Danarius in his mansion, I lived there alone. He'd had a fully stocked cellar. Most of which was his favourite, Agreggio Pavali. I spent a lot of my time drinking every single bottle. It made me... broody."

"Broody?" Dorian blinked. "So what Varric called you in his book... that was true?"

Fenris nodded. "It was, but that's not why I started diluting my wine. Drinking in the mansion kept people from visiting me, not that I would have welcomed the company all that much. But it also gave me an excuse not to go to the tavern."

"So you stopped wanting to drink alone."

"Not just that." Fenris sighed.

"My apologies, I'm afraid I'm either a complete failure at reading between the lines or I truly am too drunk to follow you. I don't understand."

"It's possible I could've had something with Hawke." Fenris replied, his voice catching on her name. "She was clear enough with her interest."

"But nothing happened?"

"I didn't know if I wanted that."

Dorian frowned harder. "Perhaps we should leave this discussion for another time. I'm not following and... and I don't want to... upset you if I happen to say the wrong thing."

"No Dorian, I started this by giving you the wine."

"Alright."

"After..." Fenris hesitated, his eyes hard and troubled as he heaved a sigh as though deciding to finally let it go. "After Danarius... I, well I didn't know what I liked. Hawke was stunning. Beautiful, talented, witty and... and she always tried to do the right thing. I admired her, but I didn't know if that also meant I was attracted to her."

"Because she was a woman you mean?"

Fenris nodded. "I had no experience with... women. And I didn't understand about preferences and choices. At least not for... that."

"So you were never with anyone while in Kirkwall?" Dorian asked quietly.

"No, nothing like that. I spent time with Isabella. She... helped me understand my... needs. Hawke found out of course. Isabella was never what you would call subtle and I think it hurt her."

"You never asked?"

Fenris shook his head. "It seemed cruel at the time. I think Isabella explained, but that's the past. It wasn't until Isabella invited another to share our bed that I learned what I hadn't known since escaping Danarius."

"It was a man, wasn't it?"

Fenris nodded. "Up until then I thought my attraction to men was because I had never known anything else. I'd never been given the choice."

Dorian had gone quiet as Fenris trailed off. His eyes were troubled and there was a shine to them that hadn't been there before.

Dorian sighed and stood up, his voice gruff as though his throat had closed. "I thank you for the wine and the conversation, but I think I should go. You're right. I've had too much to drink, quite embarrassing really. Good evening Fenris." He said, moving to the door and not meeting the elf's eyes.

Fenris was out of his seat and blocking the doorway before Dorian could reach it. "Dorian? What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong." He lied. "I just really don't feel well. Might even be a little sick. Not to worry though, a bit of rest and I'll be right as rain by morning."

"You're welcome to stay."

Dorian smiled, though it was clear he was upset. "I thank you for the offer, but I'm not comfortable having anyone watch me be sick. I promise we'll talk tomorrow if you wish to continue this discussion."

Fenris nodded, stepping close and kissing the mage softly on the lips. "I'll hold you to that mage."

"I'm sure you will." Dorian nodded as Fenris held the door open for him. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight Dorian."

\----xxx----

Dorian's tears were flowing freely by the time he reached his quarters. Fenris' revelation regarding Danarius had him feeling so much guilt and shame, he was surprised the warrior could even stand to be in the same room with him.

Angrily he tore at his robes and armour, tossing it all to the floor until he was left standing in only his smallclothes. He was such an utter, arrogant fool. For all his speeches over how his country could be redeemed, he had never looked too closely at slavery.

Always it was the blood magic. He wasn't stupid. He knew that meant the sacrificing of slaves and he'd heard of magisters using their slaves for other things, but... But he preferred to pretend it didn't happen often, as though that mattered.

How could someone like Fenris ignore that? He didn't see how the elf could feel anything for him other than disgust and resentment. He knew nothing of the reality of slavery. Had even had several arguments with the Inquisitor over the matter, taking his anger over his own ignorance out on her.

He suspected she knew why he'd gotten angry, but he was ashamed he didn't know. Had never really wanted to know. It wasn't as though he could change it. Many had tried over the years and they were all dead, murdered as soon as anyone knew they were against it. He didn't have a death wish and slavery was everywhere in Tevinter. He might have had to live with it, but the less he knew of the reality, the easier it was to pretend it wasn't a problem.

He tossed a fireball into the hearth and sat before it, staring into the flames and wishing his homeland was different. Or perhaps it would have been better if he were different, blindly oblivious to everything that made the Imperium hated by every other country in Thedas. But it wasn't different and he wasn't different and there was truly nothing he could do about it.

What he could do was stop encouraging Fenris' advances. It was the last thing he wanted to do, but whether the elf saw him as a replacement for Danarius or had convinced himself he was attracted to Dorian, he couldn't pretend he wasn't a mage or an Altus in the Imperium. He might not be a Magister, but Altus was close enough and he didn't want Fenris thinking of him in that light.

With a pained sigh and a quick swipe at his eyes to dry his tears, he fell into bed and the blissful nothingness of alcohol induced oblivion.

 

 


	4. Truths and Plans

Fenris had hesitated at letting Dorian leave, but it had been clear enough that Dorian was emotionally drained. Even had he not been he'd had too much to drink for anything to have happened between them.

He'd not planned to kiss the man but he hadn't any other notion on how to get Dorian's attention. Plus he'd really wanted to kiss him. Standing there, dishevelled and unable to hide his distress behind snarky comments and witticisms, his true self had been laid bare. It was everything he'd suspected Dorian was hiding and it was the most attractive thing he'd ever seen.

By the time they reached his quarters he'd begun to think he might be going too fast. Dorian hadn't rejected his advances, had welcomed them even, but the question he'd asked on the ramparts had bothered him. He'd never given any thought to how Dorian's attraction to men might be received in Tevinter. Especially someone like Dorian who clung to his ideals as though they were a lifeline. And perhaps they were, perhaps it was the only true power the mage had held as an only son of a Magister.

The thought was sobering and it made him think that maybe there was more than one kind of slavery in the Imperium. That perhaps nothing ever changed or improved because everyone there had become so accustomed to slavery it permeated every aspect of society.

He sipped at his wine, still troubled by what Dorian had revealed about his past. Everything he'd learned tonight had been eye opening. It gave reason for Dorian's behaviour. From his flippant way of talking, his need to dress to attract, to his snark and casual condemnation of himself and his countrymen. It was rare to see him argue or be upset, but when he did it was full of a passion he tried hard to keep hidden. He suspected Dorian was passionate about a great many things, but time and experience had taught him to keep those thoughts to himself.

It was unlike how he himself reacted to things. He was passionate to the point of extreme inflexibility on matters he cared about. Backing up that passion up both vocally and violently when necessary. He doubted there was anyone who didn't know his feelings on any subject, but the same could not be said about Dorian.

He shook his head at the brooding he was indulging in and headed to bed. He would have to make a point of speaking to the mage tomorrow. There were a lot of things he wanted answers to and though his frustrations were maddening, he wanted this, whatever this was between them, to be done properly. He didn't want to screw it up and ruin what he suspected could become something precious neither of them had ever known but both desperately craved.

\----xxx----

Dorian woke with a pounding in his head, groaning as he swung his legs over the side and sat up. He downed a healing potion and got dressed, his stomach growling loudly now that the alcohol he'd drank the previous evening had worn off.

He headed to the dining hall at a brisk pace, denying that his early rise from bed had anything to do with the fact that Fenris tended to sleep late more often than not. He was not avoiding the man, he was just hungry.

\----xxx----

Fenris woke, frowning at the lateness of the hour and got dressed. He'd hoped to catch Dorian at breakfast, but after knocking on his door and receiving no response he'd entered to find the room empty.

He headed to the dining hall where people were still lingering over their meals, but the mage was nowhere to be seen. He joined Varric at his table, helping himself to the variety of dishes laid out before him.

"So Broody. Heard you and Sparkler were talking last night. How'd it go?"

Fenris scowled. Of course the dwarf had heard about that. He'd done the same thing often enough in Kirkwall, why would it be any different here?

"It was fine Varric." He said between mouthfuls of poached egg.

"Well good. Glad you two are getting along."

"Is there something you wanted to know Varric? Just ask and get it out of your system."

"Alright. I just want to make sure you aren't going to break his heart. Sparkler's been through enough already and I don't want to see him hurt."

"You think I'm toying with him?"

Varric frowned. "No. I think neither of you have enough experience with relationships. It's just something you should keep in mind if you're looking for something more."

"I assure you Varric my intentions are honourable, and now that you mention it, Dorian has mentioned a few troubling things from his past. I don't suppose you know anything about that?"

"All I know is what everyone else knows. Dorian left the Imperium because of something to do with his parents. A very unpleasant and shocking event from what I've heard, but if you want details, you'd have to ask him."

"I might just do that. Can I ask why you're so interested in this?"

"Because I like you Broody and I like Sparkler too. You're my friends and you deserve to be happy."

Fenris grunted as he finished the juice he'd been drinking. "I appreciate that Varric and on that note, have you seen Dorian this morning? Is he in the library yet?"

"I saw him earlier when he left with the Inquisitor's group. Off to meet with some Grey Warden Hawke knows in Crestwood."

"Hawke was here?"

Varric nodded. "Sorry broody, but she was only here for a few hours while you were out in the Hissing Wastes. She said to say hello and to tell you she's glad you've joined the Inquisition"

"So Hawke's with the Inquisitor then?"

"No she left after her meeting with the Inquisitor. Wanted to get a head start I suppose. Didn't want to wait."

"Is she... how was she Varric?"

"You know Hawke. Charming, witty but more serious than I remember. This business with Corypheus has her worried."

"I can't believe he's back."

"That makes two of us broody."

 

 

 


	5. Running

Dorian regretted volunteering for the expedition to Crestwood soon after they set camp. The place was cold, wet and so overcast it did nothing to improve his mood. To make things worse there was a bloody rift at the bottom of a lake and the place was crawling with the undead and shades.

They'd only gone a short distance toward the small village when they were attacked by the creatures and then found themselves defending the town from another group of demons. After speaking with some inhabitants and the mayor, Dorian became increasingly uncomfortable. There was something very wrong here and he doubted very much they would see a happy resolution to things.

The veil here was thin and the pull of those who'd died in this place called to his magic, especially his necromancy. By the time they took back the outpost some bandits had overrun, he was exhausted and miserable.

"Hey Vint." Bull asked as they settled in for the night. "You feeling okay?"

"How can anyone feel okay in this dismal place?" He groused, picking at his stew.

"It's not so bad. Least we have walls to protect us and we won't need to keep watch tonight."

"I suppose I should be grateful then."

"Come on Dorian. I know you led a pampered life, but this isn't like you. What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong. If you'll excuse me, I'm going to bed. See you all in the morning."

Sera had just taken a seat beside Bull when Dorian disappeared inside his tent. The Inquisitor soon joined them and they ate quietly before Sera began to fidget.

"Alright. So what's up with magey-bits? I can't be the only one who's noticed he's not acting right."

"He has been rather withdrawn since we got here." The Inquisitor agreed.

"At first I thought it was all the damn rain, but it's just rain. Not like that miserable swamp we went to at all." Sera ventured.

"I think it might be something to do with his father." The Inquisitor added. "I think he's still working through that. What about you Bull? Got any insights?"

"I think the Vint's interested in someone back at Skyhold." Iron Bull said quietly, hoping the mage couldn't hear him over the rain.

"Who?" Sera squealed excitedly.

"Not sure I should say. You know how private Dorian is. I think it's got him a bit twisted up inside."

The Inquisitor's eyes went wide. "If it's who I think it is, I can see why."

"What? You know?" Sera cried. "Come on, tell me! I can't be the only one who doesn't know!"

The Inquisitor shook her head. "Sorry Sera, but Bull's right. If this is what has Dorian upset, it's better if we don't mention it. I don't like how he's acting and I don't want him doing something stupid if he thinks people might tease him about it. Besides, he's been through enough this week already."

"Fine. Keep your secret, but I'm gonna find out. Be better if you just told me though."

"Just give him some time to work it out Sera." Bull said.

"Right. Cuz that won't take forever." She grumbled. "I'm going to bed. The two of you are no fun."

After Sera disappeared into the tent she shared with the Inquisitor, Bull felt their leader's eyes on him.

"So what do you think Bull? Is Dorian making a mistake? Is this gonna blow up in our faces?"

Bull shook his head. "So long as the Vint manages to get his head out of his ass and the elf doesn't push, I think it could be good for both of them."

"Really? Seems more like an explosion waiting to happen."

"Maybe from a distance, but the elf's been free a long time. Dorian's new to it, hasn't had time to adjust."

"And you don't see that as a problem?"

"They're more alike than they realize, though the elf is smart. I'm betting he'll figure it out first."

"Okay but promise me if you think they need an intervention. I don't want a singed elf or a mage missing his heart in my keep."

"If any hearts go missing it'll be to each other. And if they take their sweet time figuring things out, we're all gonna get burned."

\----xxx----

A week after the Inquisitor's party had left, he was both bored and anxious. The keep had received a message via one of Leliana's ravens and when Fenris heard he wanted nothing more than to join them.

He was sharing a pint of ale when a messenger stopped at the table and handed him a note. Frowning, he opened it and began to read.

"Something wrong Broody?" Varric asked his brow quizzical.

"It's from the Inquisitor. She wants me to meet them in Crestwood."

"That's what you want isn't it? It's pretty clear you're climbing the walls here with nothing to do."

Fenris made a face. "It's not that, it's what else she says."

"Which is?"

"It's about Dorian. She's worried about him, he's not acting like himself. She doesn't want to send him back, but it seems he's not telling them what's wrong."

"So how does she propose to fix it?"

"How do you feel about taking a trip Varric?" Fenris asked, a smile tugging at his lips.

"Why?"

"She's going to have two groups out there. She'll take care of the rifts, while the second group deals with bandits and some other problems they've spotted in the area."

"And how is she going to justify waiting for a second team?"

Fenris broke into a grin. "She doesn't have to. Both Bull and Dorian got hit with wyvern venom, then fell into a patch of spindleweed. They won't be up and moving for at least three days."

Varric laughed. "Well that works."

"Only one thing more. She's left it to us to choose our third member."

"What? Why?"

"She didn't say."

"At least it's a short list to choose from."

 

 

 


	6. Inadequate

For the hundredth time Dorian cursed himself for not studying the healing arts of magic. As a youth, top of his class in every subject and with his skills in offensive spell-casting, there'd been no good reason to spend time learning it. There were laetens and preateri for that. Even if there hadn't been, his parents would never have permitted him to waste time on studying the healing arts. It was beneath his status as an Altus, but more than that it would have scandalized and ruined the Pavus name if anyone learned of it. So he hadn't studied it beyond the required minimum in order to keep up appearances and meet expectations.

Yet as he lay in a sickbed, recovering from falling into a stand of spindleweed and a barrier misstep which resulted in being hit with wyvern venom, he vowed to change that as soon as he returned to Skyhold. He didn't care who he learned it from, but by the Maker he would not leave the keep again until he was bloody well able to heal more than just superficial cuts and bruises.

It didn't help that he'd been wallowing in thoughts of Fenris since they'd arrived either. Vacillating between keeping his distance and the ridiculous hope that the elven warrior wouldn't let him go so easily. Nor did it help that as far as he was concerned, both the wyvern accident and subsequent spindleweed problem was entirely his fault.

Neither the Inquisitor nor the Iron Bull agreed but if he'd been paying attention, he was certain he would have seen the wyvern coming up behind him and the Bull who'd been coming to his aide in time to put up a barrier to protect them both. But he hadn't and both he and the Bull had taken a direct hit of venom.

The pain and inability to see clearly was excruciating and after they'd left the den of wyvern behind and were on their way back to camp, he'd tripped. Bull had tried to help, but being as incapacitated as Dorian, rather than help he'd fallen with the mage, dumping them both into a stand of spindleweed.

Sera had laughed like a maniac finding the entire incident the funniest thing she'd ever seen. The Inquisitor had joined in and was soon followed by Bull until they were all laughing hysterically. All except him, since he hadn't seen anything and instead gotten a face full of the horrid plant which had subsequently swollen his eyes shut. The only thing that had kept him from losing his chickens completely was the fact he couldn't see the damage to his face. But that part had been short-lived since his companions had then had to carry him back to camp.

After sending for a healer from their forward camp, the Inquisitor had announced she was sending for a second team to assist. He'd growled and swore under his breath after she'd left his tent, convinced they were all now blaming him for what had happened. Both Sera and Iron Bull had come to see him, assuring him nothing of what happened was his fault and he listened but didn't agree. He couldn't argue though since after the first day, he'd had a reaction to the spindleweed and lost his voice.

When news arrived that the second group would be there within the hour, he could barely crack an eye open. He was miserable and inconsolable until he heard that Vivienne was coming and he allowed himself to release some of his frustrations. At least when she arrived she could heal him and get him out of this Maker forsaken tent.

"Dorian." The Inquisitor said from his left. "I'm sure you've heard that Vivienne is on her way."

"I have and I thank you for that. It will be a relief to get out of this tent." He said, his voice still rough.

"Well you should also know that Fenris and Varric are with her. They've been informed about what happened and I'm told Fenris was concerned." What she didn't tell him was that the elf had wanted to separate from the others to reach Dorian sooner and had to be talked out of it after a heated argument with Varric.

"I see."

"He's asked to see you when he arrives."

"Absolutely not." Dorian growled. "Bad enough I've been stuck in this tent due to a failure on my part to do my job properly, but I do not wish to have anyone else witness to my embarrassing state of health."

"Dorian." The Inquisitor sighed. "I've already told you it wasn't your fault. It was an accident. If anyone is to blame for what happened it's me. I'm in charge and I should have had more grenades on hand before we even entered that nest."

"I thank you for your assurance Inquisitor and I appreciate the consideration, but you have your version and I have mine. I welcome Vivienne's administrations, but I do not want the elven warrior to see me like this."

"I think you're making a mistake Dorian, but I will respect your wishes."

"Thank you."

"Is there anything you need while I'm here?"

"Water would be nice."

"Alright. I'll be right back."

\----xxx----

Fenris was beside himself with worry when they heard the extent of what had happened to the Inquisitor's party. He'd been furious when he'd not been allowed to go ahead of the group, but had agreed despite his resentment to stay with them.

As they neared the camp, the Inquisitor met them on the outskirts, waving Vivienne ahead to continue on while she spoke to himself and Varric.

"What do you mean he doesn't want to see me?" He growled.

He's embarrassed and has convinced himself the entire incident is his fault." She said, giving him a look. "Also he can't quite see yet either. He took a hit of wyvern venom to the face before landing in the spindleweed. He then had a reaction and lost his ability to talk. He's had some improvement, but he looks a lot worse than he is and his voice still hasn't completely recovered."

"Fasta vaas." Fenris swore. He knew what the mage was doing and he knew that despite his wishes, the last thing Dorian needed was time alone.

"I thought you said Tiny was injured too?" Varric reminded her, puzzled. "Why are you only talking about Sparkler?"

"Apparently it's a Qunari thing or maybe Ben-Hasrath I'm not clear on that part, but Bull is in the habit of infecting himself with all kinds of nasty things. Something to do with building poison resistance?"

"He is Hissrad." Fenris growled. "It is Qunlat for liar. He's a spy and a Qunari, their Tal-Vashoth enemies always use poison on their weapons."

"Right." She nodded. "That's it. Anyway aside from some redness and a few scars, which Bull is quite proud of, he's fine."

"Well we've been warned." Varric said cheerily. "Tiny is fine and Sparkler will be after Vivienne does her thing."

"Pretty much." The Inquisitor smiled. "Anyway, Sera and I are headed out for some fresh water. See you back at camp."

He and Varric continued down the path to the camp, the dwarf with a spring in his step, happy to be able to sit after several days of walking.

"You gonna respect Sparkler's wishes?" He asked, raising an eyebrow at the elf.

"I haven't decided yet."

 


	7. An Orlesian Talking To

"Oh darling there you are." Vivienne said as she entered Dorian's tent. "My you have been suffering haven't you?"

Dorian grunted, not trusting himself to speak.

"Let me take a look at you." She clucked settling herself on the edge of his cot. "Any pain?" She asked as she turned his head with her hands to get a clearer picture of his injuries.

"Just a little." He said, his voice as dry as sandpaper. "My throat and eyes mostly."

"Alright darling. This will sting a little but I'll have you healed up in no time."

Twenty minutes later he was blinking into Vivienne's smiling face. She handed him a healing potion and after drinking it down she declared him mostly healed.

"Mostly?" He frowned.

"Yes my dear, mostly." She said, fixing him with a stern look. "I've heard you've decided this was all your fault. Also that you've been distant and sullen for most of this trip. I don't pretend to know what's going on with you, but it's clear you need to clear the air between you and a certain elf."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Don't play games with me my dear, it doesn't suit you. We both know what happens in the heat of battle if we loose our focus. Deal with it or don't return to the field until you do."

Dorian grunted but said nothing.

  
"Have it your way, but the next time it might be someone else who falls and then where will you be?"

"Alright. I'll deal with it."

"Very good darling." She smiled. "All the swelling has gone down and the redness should fade within an hour or so. Now, before I leave you, is there anything else?"

"There is one thing." He said, feeling better than he had in days. "I've had a lot of time to think about this, but I wonder if you'd be willing to teach me some healing spells."

"I'd be delighted my dear. I must warn you, it will be a fair bit challenging given your natural gifts, but you're powerful and dedicated enough that you shouldn't have much trouble with it."

"Thank you Lady Vivienne. I appreciate that. And thank you for the healing, I am indebted to you."

"Nonsense darling. It is part of my job after all." She replied, ducking out of his tent. "I'll be sending someone in to help you with a bath. It's part of your healing process after all."

He opened his mouth to protest but she was already gone. He looked down at his state of dress and winced. From outside his tent he could hear Vivienne reporting in to the Inquisitor and then a bustle of activity ensued. Ten minutes later, Bull entered his tent carrying a large portable basin, casting him an apologetic glance as he set it down and left.

A moment later, Vivienne returned to cast an ice spell to fill the bath and then a fireball spell to melt and heat the water. She nodded at him and said someone would be in to assist him straight away, but ignored his protests as she left.

He threw his legs over the side of his cot, determined to reach the bath without assistance. His legs and back protested from his extended bed rest and he was so focused on not falling that he didn't hear anyone enter until they were at his side.

"And here I thought I was stubborn." Said a deep, husky voice as the owner's hand slipped around his waist to support him.

"Fasta vaas." He said, tensing in the elf's grip on his waist. "I can do this myself."

"Sure you can." Fenris snorted. "You've managed a total of one step since Vivienne left. Stop resisting and let me help you."

"Fine." Dorian snapped. "But only since it seems so important to everyone here that I not fall and inconvenience anyone."

The warrior's grip tightened, but he said no more as he settled the mage at the edge of the tub. It was obvious Dorian was in no shape to undress himself so he said nothing as he helped get him out of his robe. He stopped at removing the man's smallclothes, letting Dorian use his arm for support as he stepped into the steaming water still wearing them.

"Better?" He asked, as the mage settled himself in the water.

"Yes thank you." He said, his voice strained.

"You look like you've needed this. Why didn't you request a bath sooner?"

A flush coloured the mage's cheeks. "Because I couldn't see what I was doing. There, are you satisfied? It's not enough this was entirely my own fault but we may as well add pathetically incompetent as well."

"Bloody mage." Fenris growled, placing himself directly in Dorian's line of sight. "Where did you get such a ridiculous notion?"

"It's not ridiculous. If I'd been paying better attention none of this would have happened."

"This is going nowhere." Fenris huffed, aware that Dorian had made no move to begin washing. Swearing under his breath, he ducked out of the tent, returning a moment later with an armful of soaps.

"What are those?" Dorian demanded.

"Soaps. Now lean forward and let me wash your back."

"It's not necessary. I can do it myself."

"No you can't or you would have started by now."

"But it's..." Dorian protested before snapping his jaw shut.

"It's what?"

"It's nothing. Forget I said anything."

Fenris sighed and began scrubbing the mage's back. His skin was smooth, his muscular back a delight beneath his hands. He noted how the mage tensed beneath his ministrations but said nothing. Passing the soap to Dorian so he could wash his front, he grabbed a bucket and waited.

"Tilt your head back and I'll get it wet so I can wash your hair."

Dorian grunted but complied, squeezing his eyes shut as he did. It was driving him mad to have the elf's hands on him, but it felt so good he had no desire to protest. As that went, he was also grateful Vivienne had added bubbles to the water which he hoped hid his growing interest in the warrior. The only reason he didn't ask the elf to leave was because he knew the Inquisitor would send someone else to take his place and he had no interest in suffering further humiliation.

"Can you get out and dried without assistance?"

Dorian's cheeks flushed. "I'm not as... stiff as before. I think I can manage."

"Fine. Then stand up and I'll put a towel around you."

When Dorian was standing free of the water, Fenris fixed him with a glare. "Get dressed. The Inquisitor wants you to join her by the fire and we have a conversation to finish." He said, turning and stalking from the tent.


	8. Tenacious

Dorian wasn't certain if it was good or bad that the conversation he was meant to have with Fenris didn't happen. The Inquisitor was anxious to wrap up the excursion to Crestwood and split them into two groups. The Inquisitor's party would continue closing rifts while the other group took care of bandits, wolves and any other trouble the residents needed help with. She put Dorian in charge of the second group, taking Bull, Sera and Vivienne with her.

His first task was to drain the lake and so he, Varric and Fenris headed out. They were all suspicious when they learned the dam controls had not been damaged by darkspawn and none of them felt that learning the truth would end well. From there, they headed further inland killing bandits and wolves before setting up another camp. As soon as a pair of Inquisition soldiers joined them, they headed out again to deliver the news of the wyvern's deaths to Eliza, the woman who'd been studying them.

They then discovered an abandoned quarry and claimed it for the Inquisition before returning to camp. There, they were tasked with letting a Chantry sister know the bodies she wished to lay to rest had been recovered. By the time they reached the camp where they were to meet up with the Inquisitor, they were all tired, dirty and in no mood for conversation. After a light supper they turned in for the night exhausted from the day's events.

\----xxx----

Fenris was irritated the mage had made no effort to speak to him privately. As far as he was concerned, there was no good reason for the brutal pace the man set for completing the tasks before them. It was understood the closing of the rift beneath the lake by the Inquisitor would take at least two days before they joined them in camp. Dorian was still avoiding him and he still hadn't puzzled out why.

He hadn't wanted to involve Varric, but Dorian had given him little choice. As soon as the mage retired to his tent, he poured out two glasses of his favourite ale and handed one to the dwarf.

"What's on your mind elf?" Varric asked taking a healthy swallow. "You've been glaring at Dorian since we set out."

"I'm not glaring Varric."

"Okay brooding then. What's up?"

"He's avoiding me. He's been doing it since before he left Skyhold."

"And?"

"And he promised we'd continue our conversation from the night before he left."

"Let me guess, he's pretending there's nothing to discuss?"

"Something like that."

"And then he gets injured and suddenly everything is his fault."

"Yes."

"So what were you taking about before he made you that promise?"

Fenris scowled. "We talked about a lot of things Varric. Kirkwall, my borrowed mansion, Hawke, Isabella. Danarius."

"Mind telling me the context?"

Fenris blushed. "My... preferences."

Varric chuckled, giving a low whistle as he did. "Geez elf, you sure know how to break the ice."

"Why? What did I do?"

"Do you really need me to paint a picture? Preferences and Danarius in the same sentence? Think about who you were talking to. You'll figure it out."

"Kaffas! That's not why I mentioned it at all."

"But it's Sparkler we're talking about here, not some callous Magister from the Imperium. What do you suppose occurred to him with that revelation?"

"Dammit Varric, that wasn't my intention."

"Does it matter?"

"No, I suppose not."

"I told you Sparkler was different. I know you noticed or you wouldn't have warmed up to him, but now you know just how different."

"I should not have told him about Danarius."

"You know he would have figured it out eventually. It's better this way."

"How is it better?"

"It's better because now you know he's not just saying what you want to hear. He means what he says and he feels things deeply. You've seen it for yourself."

"But how do I fix it Varric? I've never experienced anything like this and I never imagined feeling this way about a mage, never mind one from Tevinter. Are these things always so complicated?"

Varric laughed. "They are in my experience. Just talk to him, show him you're serious. He can be stubborn but he's not blind. He'll come around, it just might not go as smoothly as you hope."

"So long as it goes somewhere Varric."

"I'm positive it'll be worth it."


	9. Old Friends and Envy

The Inquisitor's party joined them shortly after breakfast and they all set out to meet with Hawke's warden friend. Dorian hung back while Varric and Fenris greeted the Champion with smiles that reached their eyes. What the Warden Stroud had to say chilled everyone present and their next destination was set. Stroud left to scout the area ahead known as the Western Approach, while Hawke chose to remain with their group a while longer. They returned to camp, looking forward to a few hours rest when a messenger arrived to tell them of a dragon spotted in the area.

Iron Bull was ecstatic while everyone else groaned. There was no question of leaving it for another day. With the rifts closed and the rain finally ended, Crestwood would be easy pickings for a dragon. The companions replenished their supplies, the Inquisitor, Bull and Sera taking the lead. Hawke linked arms with Varric and Fenris and followed in their wake, leaving Dorian and Vivienne to guard their backs. Vivienne was not inclined to speak, preferring instead to take stock of the surrounding countryside, stopping occasionally to inspect a plant she'd not seen before.

Dorian was grateful for her silence, having no interest in small talk. But it gave him no distraction from watching the ease with which Fenris conducted himself in Hawke's presence. It was clear how close the three friends from Kirkwall were. Laughing and joking easily in each other's company, no tension or glaring looks evident on any of their faces.

And then they were fighting a High Dragon and the laughter ended. But Dorian couldn't tear his eyes from how in-sync Fenris and Hawke conducted themselves on the battlefield. While Fenris streaked towards the dragon, lit with blue light, Hawke vanished in a cloud of smoke only to reappear at the warrior's side to strike a devastating blow to the dragon's flank. He was so distracted by their elaborate and unfaltering dance, he was slow in renewing his barrier and was hit by a bolt of lightning from the dragon. Pain seared through him as the impact threw him twenty feet through the air, searing his flesh where it hit and again when it left him through his thigh. He blinked skyward, the wind knocked out of him, thinking that his week couldn't get any worse as the smell of his own burning flesh reached him.

He heard shouts of protest through his haze of pain and then warmth flooded through him as Vivienne's magic healed him. He got up, shaking himself and returned to battle nodding thanks to Vivienne as he sent a column of ice into the dragon's head. Hawke, Bull, Fenris, and the Inquisitor were winning the battle against the dragon's rear flanks. Varric and Sera were doing a fine job of keeping the dragon from taking it's frustrations out on the warriors beneath it, while Vivienne maintained barriers and healed anyone who needed it.

Dorian saw all this as though from a distance and wondered again why the Inquisition needed him. He'd been down for only a short time, but to his mind no one had noticed his absence. He continued to cast, adding his own barrier to those closest to the danger, but his heart wasn't in it. Twenty minutes later, the dragon was dead and Bull drew everyone in with his whoop of celebration, all of them relieved to be alive and well.

Back at camp, their victory had preceded them and they were hustled off to the fortress for an impromptu celebration. Amidst drinks, cheer and a hearty meal everyone relaxed and enjoyed their victory. All except Dorian who slipped away unseen, leaving the fortress to stand atop the hill overlooking Crestwood's dam.

\----xxx----

Hawke was watching him, an amused expression on her face. It was making him uncomfortable, especially since he was certain he knew what was on her mind.

"If you've something to say Hawke..."

"Why are you letting Dorian shut you out Fenris? It's not like you."

"I'm not letting him do anything. Dorian can do what he likes."

"Not if you don't want him to and you know it. I can't believe you've fallen for someone more stubborn than you, or that you can't see how far he's fallen for you."

"Dorian hasn't fallen for me Hawke, He's just lonely."

"He's not _"just anything"_ around you Fenris. You know he fell during the fight with the dragon right?"

"What? No he didn't."

"He did. He was watching you and I work together. He seemed sad... maybe even jealous and then he was hit with a bolt of lightning."

"Sad? Jealous? You imagined it Hawke. And I didn't see any of that, he couldn't have fallen."

"Vivienne healed him almost as soon as he fell."

Fenris scowled. It upset him that he hadn't known the mage had fallen and he wasn't sure why. He'd always known when Hawke fell in Kirkwall, which might be why he hadn't seen. It filled him with guilt to realize he hadn't thought of the mage with Hawke at his side. Was he wrong to pursue the mage? Was he only fooling himself?"

"Fenris." Hawke said quietly, her hand resting on the back of his. "He seems a good man. You shouldn't let anything come between you. I've seen how you look at him and I'm telling you he has the same look when he's watching you."

Fenris sighed. "I don't know why you put up with me. Especially after what I did to you in Kirkwall."

"Don't be ridiculous Fenris. Your friendship has been invaluable to me. I may regret we couldn't be together, but I'd rather that than have you live a lie. Don't let Dorian go without a fight Fenris. You of all people deserve to be happy and from what I've heard, so does Dorian."

Fenris smiled. "Thank you Hawke. For everything."

He got to his feet, threading his way through the celebrants, his eyes roaming the crowd for Dorian.

"Looking for Sparkler elf?" Varric asked catching sight of him.

"Have you seen him?"

"Sorry but not for a while. Maybe ask Bull."

"You're not serious. The oxman is practically under the table with drink."

"He's also Ben-Hasrath"

"Good point." Fenris grumbled, leaving Varric to speak with Bull.

\----xxx----

"Dorian." He said, when he found the mage outside the fortress.

Dorian sighed and turned to face him. His body tense, his face was unreadable as Fenris came closer. He debated asking what was wrong but guessed by the mage's demeanour it would lead nowhere. So he took another step, pulling Dorian into a crushing embrace, his arms holding him close.

Dorian stiffened and after a moment relaxed in the warrior's arms, clinging to him as though unable to hold himself upright. They stayed like that for several moments, their bodies pressed together as though each were a lifeline they clung to for strength and purpose.

"Why are you doing this Fenris?" Dorian asked, releasing him but not stepping away.

"I'm uncertain, but I care about you Dorian and you promised me we would talk. You have yet to fulfill that promise."

Dorian sighed. "To what end? I'm an Altus, you're a former slave. How can you even stand to be anywhere near me? I represent every vile thing that ever happened to you."

"No you do not. You are nothing like the Magisters Dorian."

"Of course not. I just blindly accepted the way slaves are treated in Tevinter. I did nothing about it, ignored it even. Pretending that the less I knew the better."

"I know you had no choice. Every magister who's ever tried to change it has been murdered, assassinated. At least it bothers you Dorian. The majority doesn't care."

"Yes because caring is so very noble while slaves are sacrificed to fuel a blood mage's power." He scoffed.

"Why has this become such a problem for you?" Fenris pressed as Dorian stepped out of his reach. "I knew it bothered you, but this... this is something different. What happened with your father in Redcliff?"

Dorian's eyes grew haunted and he blinked, refusing to meet Fenris' eyes. "Nothing you need to know. We were discussing the evils of slavery."

"He upset you Dorian, he hurt you. I want to know what happened."

"Nothing that would compare to what Danarius did to you I'm certain." Dorian snapped. "You of all people should not be bothered by my petty domestic troubles."

"Dammit mage." Fenris growled, gripping Dorian by the hips and yanking him close. "Stop belittling your distress and tell me what he did to you!"

"He tried to change me! He wanted me pliant, was planning to use blood magic to make me marry and provide an heir!" Dorian cried, struggling to free himself from the elf's grip. "There, are you happy now?! Let me go!"

Fenris gaped at the mage he held in his arms. He could see the pain and hurt Dorian was desperate to hide, but the memory of what his father had done lingered. He had never imagined a father attempting such a thing simply for the sake of appearances. He knew from his time with Danarius that such a ritual was not only dangerous but impossible to guarantee results. Dorian must have known that as well, which was why he'd run.

"Stop struggling Dorian, I'm not going to hurt you."

"You don't know that! People promise these things all the time yet somehow mean nothing when the right circumstances arise."

Fenris was shocked by the mage's words. How many times had he been betrayed by someone he trusted? What had they done to him?

"Dorian stop."

"No." He sobbed into the warrior's shoulder. "I can't."

"I don't know what happened to you Dorian but I promise I'll never hurt you."

"You'll forgive me if I don't believe you." He mumbled, too drained to argue further.

"Come on mage. Let's find somewhere warmer where we can talk."


	10. Cold Shower

Fenris led them to a tent far removed from the festivities, leaving Dorian on his own while he went in search of food and drink for them both. When he returned they ate in silence, neither inclined to break the fragile peace between them.

"I'm only going to say this once mage." Fenris began. "You've only had a short time to live with what your father tried to do. He was wrong and he betrayed you. I suspect he wasn't the first to betray your trust given your distress, but you did not deserve it. No one deserves what happened to you, just as I did not deserve to be made a slave."

Dorian was sullen but said nothing.

"I care about you Dorian. I enjoy your wit and charm, I even find the way you dress endearing. You're smart, passionate and resourceful. You... scared me when I heard you'd been injured and it hurt when the Inquisitor said you did not wish to see me. But I understand why you said it and I want you to know you never need to hide from me."

"This is all very... unusual." Dorian sniffed when Fenris finished. "I don't understand why you feel this way, especially about me and I'm flattered. I'm also a bit concerned about it as well, especially after what you said about Danarius."

"You think I'm looking for a new master." Fenris growled.

"Not intentionally." Dorian stammered.

"I assure you I do not see you as a master."

Dorian huffed, though a smile tugged at his lips. "I'm not sure if that's meant as an insult or not, but I'll take it as compliment."

"As you should."

"So what happens now?"

"Would you agree to spending time with me? See how things go between us?"

"You mean dating? Courtship? Being seen in public together?"

"What else would I mean?"

"I don't know. But yes, I would like that. I find you extraordinarily attractive and I care about you. Though I must warn you, I've never courted anyone."

"Neither have I, but I shall be the one courting you."

"That doesn't seem fair."

"I'll find a way for you to make it up to me then."

"I'm not sure I like the sound of that."

"No?" Fenris teased. "You think I won't play fair?"

"I... think you might play dirty." Dorian replied, his mouth dry.

"I will not ask for anything you are not willing to give."

"Oh. Well then." Dorian replied, his mind filling with things he would be willing to give.

Fenris smiled, crossing to the mage to take him in his arms. He pressed his lips to Dorian's, feeling him relax in his embrace. Dorian moaned, his hands moving to the elf's back to caress him lazily.

Fenris growled deep in his throat, the feel of Dorian pressed against him driving him mad with need.

"How do you do that?" Dorian rasped against his lips.

"Do what?"

"Charge an entire space with sexual tension with only a kiss?"

"Talent I suppose."

Dorian chuckled. "If that's one of your talents, I look forward to seeing more of them."

"In time mage." Fenris promised, pulling away. "As I look forward to discovering yours."

\----xxx----

The Inquisitor's party returned to Skyhold where they were met by Stroud with information on Adamant Fortress. A War Table meeting was called and planning began on breaching the Warden stronghold. Fenris had wanted to invite Dorian to share dinner with him, but the mage was stuck in a meeting with the Inquisitor until well after dark. He had no idea how long the meeting would run, so he went to bed hoping to catch him at breakfast.

"Elf." Varric greeted him at his table the next morning. "Looking for Sparkler?"

"Has he been through here yet?"

"Haven't seen him. The meeting ran late into the night. He's probably still sleeping."

"I'll let him sleep then."

"Really? Isn't that a missed opportunity elf?"

Fenris scowled. "I want to do this right Varric."

"And by right, you mean what? Dating?" Varric couldn't hide his shock.

"Something wrong with that?"

"I guess I didn't realize how serious this was for you. Word of advice though? Dorian might not get subtle if you catch my meaning."

"I might. I'll let you know if I don't."

"Just checking." Varric murmured, his face suddenly brightening in a smile. "Ah and here's the man of the hour himself."

Fenris turned to see Dorian approaching. He was dressed in a stunning outfit of deep royal blue and shimmering white silk. His hair and moustache immaculate, his eyes twinkling with pleasure as he caught and held Fenris' gaze. His breath caught in his throat at the sight of the mage, the man's eyes filling with desire as he neared. His pulse sped as Dorian stepped close, his tongue licking his bottom lip to moisten it.

"Varric. If it isn't my favourite dwarf. What's on the menu this morning?"

"The usual. Breads, pastries, meats and cheeses. Maybe even a little something exotic from our Northern neighbours."

"Sounds enticing. What do you recommend?"

"Maybe a small sample first? Wouldn't want to overindulge too soon, might turn you right off."

"A sample sounds promising." Dorian replied, turning eyes filled with heat on Fenris. "Exotic things are meant to be savoured after all."

"If the two of you are quite finished." Fenris growled, his hands gone damp from Dorian's suggestive banter.

"Varric, does the dining hall seem a tad warm to you?" Dorian asked innocently.

"Now that you mention it, I think it is. I recommend stepping outside to catch the air."

"Excellent suggestion Varric." Dorian beamed. "Care to join me Fenris? You're looking a bit flushed."

"Lead the way mage." Fenris growled, falling in behind Dorian as he headed for the ramparts near Cullen's tower.

Outside, he caught the hem of Dorian's robe, spinning him around to face him and pulling him into his arms. "What was that?" He growled, his eyes riveted to Dorian's lips.

"I thought it was obvious. I want another taste. I was disappointed when I didn't see you last night."

"You were busy. I planned to catch you this morning."

"Well you've caught me. What do you plan to do with me?"

Fenris growled and caught his lips in a bruising kiss, grinding himself into Dorian and drawing a moan from him. His lips parted and the kiss deepened, their hands exploring the other's back as the heat between them rose quickly.

"Is there a reason why you haven't ravished me senseless?" Dorian whispered against his lips, his breathing ragged.

"I'm savouring the exotic." Fenris smiled, his tongue licking the mage's bottom lip, making him shiver in his arms.

"I'm of the opinion savouring is overrated. I recommend indulging at the first opportunity." Dorian sighed as a tremble ran through him.

"I will indulge when the timing is right." Fenris growled, dipping his head to trace his tongue down the mage's neck. "When what's on offer is perfectly prepared, it's much more likely to be appreciated."

Dorian dug his fingers into the elf's upper arms, his body trembling with the sensations the elf was drawing from his body. "Indulgence is nothing to sneer at Fenris. Exotic things can be rewarding if savoured frequently and often."

"I have all the reward I need in my arms right now." Fenris replied, capturing Dorian's lips in another hungry kiss of lips and tongue.

"You... you can't be serious." Dorian gasped as Fenris released him.

Fenris smiled, his eyes twinkling. "You said these things were meant to be done over dinner and drinks."

"I... I said no such thing."

"You did and I happen to agree with you. Next time we have a moment I'm taking you to dinner."

"You're teasing me." Dorian scowled. "There's nowhere to go for dinner here. We're surrounded by mountains and ice."

"Then I guess I'll just have to get creative." He said, smiling as he headed to Cullen's office.

"Where in blazes do you think you're going?"

"I have a meeting with Commander Cullen. See you later mage."

"Fasts vaas." Dorian swore, returning to the keep, face flushed, his breeches now painfully uncomfortable

"Problems Sparkler?" Varric asked when he returned to the dining hall.

"That Maker forsaken elf will be the death of me."

Varric chuckled and gestured for Dorian to join him. Dorian sank into a chair and helped himself to the cinnamon pastries laid out before him and slathered one with butter.

"I really need to know where the Inquisitor gets these delightful bits of mouth watering goodness." He said, licking his fingers where the sugar coating had melted. "At least they don't run away when you want them."

"You doubt the elf wants you? Giving up already Sparkler? That's not like you."

"Bite your tongue dwarf. I'm not giving up. I just... I don't understand him Varric. He acts like he wants me, kisses me like no other and yet..." He paused, not sure if he wanted to continue.

"Yet he doesn't behave like others you've been with." Varric finished.

"Exactly. It's maddening. What am I doing wrong? He didn't even notice my outfit." Dorian complained.

"Trust me Sparkler, he noticed. That elf notices a lot more than you think he does."

"I had noticed that, but you haven't answered my question Varric. I saw how... comfortable he was with Hawke. He's never looked at me like that."

"Jealous Sparkler? I'm shocked."

Dorian scowled, looking as though he'd just smelled something vile. "Of course not. I'd rather call it... envious."

"Well you've got nothing to worry about there. Fenris and Hawke have been through a lot together, but I promise they're just good friends."

"They looked closer than that." Dorian grumbled, absently picking crumbs from his clothes.

"Wait. Is that why you got hit by that dragon in Crestwood? You were staring at them?"

"I was admiring how well they worked together on a battlefield. Pure tactical interest."

"You wanted it to be you."

"And that's my cue to leave. Will you be joining the Inquisitor when she leaves for Adamant Fortress?"

"I think it's all hands on deck for that. The only thing that hasn't been decided is who will be with the Inquisitor when we breach the walls."

"Mmm." Dorian nodded. "Well I've got some research to do. I'll be in the library if the Inquisitor comes looking for me."

"What about a white-haired elf?"

"I doubt he'll come looking. He seems to prefer it when he's the one being sought out. I'm not inclined to play that game."

"Maybe he just wants to stand apart from others who've caught your interest in the past? Think about it Sparkler, you might be pleasantly surprised. By the Fade, you might even enjoy it."

"I'll take it into consideration."

\----xxx----

After his meeting with Cullen, the Commander invited him to a game of chess in the garden. He accepted knowing Dorian was likely still miffed with him and wouldn't yet be in a forgiving mood.

"I hear you and Dorian have become friendly." Cullen commented as he moved a piece on the board.

"Varric warned me about that." Fenris grumbled, though his voice held a trace of humour.

Cullen flushed red. "What? Have I said something wrong? Maker, I need to learn to be more tactful."

Fenris laughed. "It's nothing Cullen. Varric just said that rumours travel fast around here, I guess I'm just surprised by how fast."

"I'm sorry, I should not have said anything, it's truly none of my business."

"It's alright. Dorian and I have become closer, though I'm hoping to change that to something more."

"You and Dorian? Forgive me but I never would have thought you'd be comfortable around mages."

"That makes two of us. What about you?" Fenris asked, his brow raised in question. "I remember how you felt about mages back in Kirkwall, yet here you are with all the southern mages recruited to your cause."

"I suppose things change." Cullen smiled, moving a pawn. "When I left Kirkwall to join the Inquisition, I also left the Order. I'd become disillusioned by my role and after what happened to Meredith..."

"I understand." Fenris nodded. "Do you have any regrets?"

"I do actually. If I hadn't been so deeply affected by what happened to me in the Circle I might have paid more attention to the wrongs being done in the Gallows. My experiences made it easy for Meredith to encourage me to turn a blind eye. In essence she manipulated me and it embittered me in my role as a Templar."

"That's a humbling thing to learn about yourself."

"It is. What of you, do you have any regrets Fenris?"

"My experiences in Kirkwall were eye-opening. I spent a lot of my time angry and afraid and far too much time drinking alone."

Cullen nodded. "I know what you mean. Do you miss being there?"

"At times. Kirkwall was my first home as a free man after all. It will always be special to me for that reason alone, but it's still a shithole."

Cullen laughed heartily. "That it is my friend. That it is. And I believe you've won this round. Well played."

"Thank you Commander." Fenris said, getting to his feet and shaking Cullen's hand. "For both the game and the conversation."

"You're welcome. I too enjoyed this, I'd welcome another round if you'd care to join me again."

"I think I'd like that."

"I'll look forward to it then. Enjoy the rest of your evening Fenris."

"Likewise Commander."


	11. Interference

Dorian was disappointed when he saw no sign of Fenris, later learning the elf had been in the garden playing chess with Cullen. It bothered him that the news sparked a twinge of jealousy but he squashed it down. He was not a terrified teenager and he would not give in to these base emotions. He had dinner with Varric and the Iron Bull, determined not to let the elf's behaviour affect his appetite. When Fenris failed to make an appearance he ignored the irritation he felt and retired to his quarters.

When he woke the next day he was vexed Fenris hadn't come to see him the previous evening, not even to bid him goodnight. He was in a foul mood as he dressed, grumbling to himself about elves and their ridiculous ideas about courtship. He was so caught up in his musings he almost tripped on the package left outside his door. Frowning, he picked it up and returned to his quarters, curious about what it might contain. It was a small, oddly shaped package wrapped in navy blue silk and tied with a golden ribbon.

He marvelled at how the package had been carefully wrapped and tugged the ribbon off. The silk fell away and as it did, a small bottle of wine was revealed, resting on top of a leather bound book. He stared at the bottle, curious, until he recognized it as being the same label as what Fenris had poured him in his quarters that first night. He smiled at it, knowing without opening it that it would be watered down.

Setting it aside, he lifted the book free of the silk cloth. It was a copy of _The Book of Shartan_ , the elf who had fought alongside Andraste to free the elves from slavery. He felt a tear well in his eye at the gift. It was not the kind of thing he'd ever expect to recieve from anyone, but the symbolism of it and the significance it held for the sender was more touching than anything he'd ever been given before. Bloody elf, he muttered under his breath as he wiped the tears from his cheeks, sniffing loudly. This was foreign territory for him and he hoped he was up to the task of being able to reciprocate in kind. He had no map for this sort of thing, but staring at the gifts, he was humbled, and he prayed to the Maker he wouldn't screw this up.

\----xxx----

Fenris had fretted himself into a frenzy over what to give the mage as a first gift. The man was a noble, accustomed to gifts and favours of extravagance. His paltry offering had seemed plain and unremarkable and it had taken him the better part of an hour to leave it at Dorian's door.

Back in his room, he drank several glasses of wine, determined to stop second-guessing himself over it. What made him stop was knowing that if Dorian didn't like it, then he was on the wrong path and could forget his pursuit of the man. But he trusted his instincts and despite his anxiety, he somehow knew Dorian would be pleased and with that thought had fallen asleep, a confident smile on his face.

\-----xxx----

He had every intention of thanking Fenris in person with a passionate kiss, but when next he opened his door it was to the sight of a messenger standing there, hand raised to knock.

"Oh! My apologies messere!" The young man stammered. "Didn't mean to startle you, but the Inquisitor sent me to fetch you. I'm to take you to her straight away."

Dorian grunted. "I understand, but would it be all right if I took a moment? I need to take care of something first."

The man's cheeks flushed crimson. "I do apologize but that won't be possible. The Inquisitor's party is already at the gates."

"Fasta vaas." Dorian swore. "Very well, lead the way then."

\----xxx---

A bustle of loud activity roused him from the pleasant dream he was having. He rolled out of bed wondering at the ruckus and dressed, strapping his armour and great sword in place before leaving his quarters.

By the time he reached the main hall, most of the noise had faded and he looked around the keep in confusion. Varric wasn't in his usual spot and he hadn't seen anyone from the inner circle. He stepped outside to see most of the courtyard deserted with only a handful of recruits and servants going about their duties as usual.

A frown creased his brow before anger replaced his confusion and he stormed back inside the keep, heading straight for Josephine's office. She looked up at him in alarm when he burst through the door, her hand coming to rest at her throat as though to protect herself.

Eyes wide, she tensed as he approached but waited while he crossed the room to her desk before speaking.

"Serah Fenris." She said, as calmly as she could as though she were attempting to sooth a wild beast. "Is there something I can help you with?"

"Where is everyone?"

"Inquisition forces are on their way to Adamant Fortress."

"Am I to understand the entirety of the Inquisitor's inner circle is gone and only I have been left behind?"

"The Inquisitor didn't wish to presume you would want to be included in the assault." Josephine stammered.

"And it didn't occur to her to ask me directly?"

"I'm sure she had every intention of doing so she just ran out of time."

"I find that hard to believe."

"If you care to assist in the assault, I can arrange to have a few soldiers accompany you until you reach the main forces."

"I do not need an escort." Fenris growled. "Who do I speak to about provisions?"

Josephine coloured, embarrassed. "I'm afraid the bulk of provisions went with the army. We have nothing to spare until our next supply caravans arrive."

"I don't believe this." He seethed. "Fine. I will leave without it then. And next time, tell the Inquisitor to talk to me rather than jump to conclusions. I do not appreciate having my choices made for me."

"Of course Serah Fenris. You have my apologies as well. I'll make certain she knows your wishes on this matter."

\----xxx----

It was several hours into their march before Dorian realized Fenris wasn't there. He looked everywhere for the glowing, broody warrior but could see no sign of the elf. It was Sera who caught him looking, driving her mare to his side with a knowing smirk on her face.

"Oy magey-pants! You looking for someone? Maybe a glowy elf with funny marks all over him?"

"As it happens, I am. Do you know where he is? Did he perhaps leave early to assist Hawke and Stroud?"

Her face clouded with confusion. "Don't think so. Pretty sure he's tucked up safe and sound back at Skyhold."

Dorian's eyes went wide with shock. "Please tell me you're not serious. The Inquisitor left him... behind?"

"Far as I know."

"But... why for bloody Maker's sake? He's a part of the Inquisition just like everyone else."

"Dunno." She shrugged. "Not my business yeah? Sure she had her reasons though."

"Fasta vaas." Dorian swore. "Reasons my ass." He set off toward the head of the Inquisition forces, his brow knitted in anger. Fenris would be furious about this and Dorian could not conceive of any good reason why the elf had been left behind. It made no sense and he was determined to have answers or go back and collect the warrior himself.

The Inquisitor smiled when she caught sight of him making his way toward her position, frowning when she saw the look on his face.

"Dorian? Everything all right? You look upset."

Cullen and Cassandra looked up at the Inquisitor's tone, concern on their faces. He scowled at them before turning his attention back to the waiting Inquisitor.

"I know this is really not the time, but might I have a word with you? In private?"

"Of course." She said, waving off her advisor's concern and leading them a few feet away from prying ears.

"Alright. We're alone. What's the problem?"

"Why did you leave him behind?"

For a moment the Inquisitor looked baffled until a light clicked on and she looked at Dorian with a distinct note of bewilderment. "You mean Fenris?" She asked, her voice filled with surprise.

"Unless someone else from your inner circle is still in Skyhold, then yes, Fenris. Why is he not part of this?"

The Inquisitor flushed in embarrassment, eyes flicking away from Dorian's stare. "Well I... ahem. He uh, doesn't look too kindly on blood mages and er... I didn't think he cared to, you know, help save Grey Wardens after what happened with Hawke and Corypheus. Also, Hawke may have asked I not bring him."

"She what!? And why would his aversion to blood magic be an issue? One of Hawke's companions was an apostate blood mage and he was with her for seven years! Never mind the fact that he's done nothing to warrant such mistrust since joining the Inquisition. I can't believe this."

"I apologize Dorian, but Hawke thought it was better to leave him behind. She felt he might be conflicted, perhaps a bit... compromised if he were here."

"That's ridiculous. Never mind the fact that she should know better than to make decisions on his behalf. How could he possibly be compromised out here?"

The Inquisitor's face was unreadable as she met his glare. "Hawke thought he might not be able to choose between the people he cares for to protect."

"That's preposterous and completely unfounded. Hawke fought alongside both Varric and Fenris in Kirkwall. She should be well aware of his strengths and this should not have been mentioned."

"It wasn't about Varric or Hawke. It was about you."

"Me? What about me?"

"We're aware of Fenris' interest in you Dorian. But it's clear I've made a serious mistake. I was only acting on Hawke's concern and I should have discussed it with him before making a decision. I'm sorry."

"Perhaps you are, but I'm not the one you need apologize to."

"You're right and I will apologize to him, assuming we all make it out of this mess in one piece." She said, her face grim as she returned to her spot at Cullen's side.

\----xxx----

Fenris made good time after arranging a horse and collecting the things he needed from his room before setting off after the Inquisition forces. He caught up to the bulk of Cullen's forces just past midday. They sprawled ahead of him as far as he could see, undulating in the distance like a bloated serpent.

It was impossible to go around them, the brush and obstacles to either side of the road impassable. So he was forced to make painfully slow progress through the mass of bodies, intent on locating Dorian. After an hour of this, he'd amended that goal to include anyone from the Inquisitor's inner circle.

He was seething with frustration and barely controlled anger as he continued to make slow progress to the front of the line. He'd been at it for another hour before he caught sight of Vivienne's ridiculous hat. Unfortunately it was at the same time when the sound of screams and explosions filled the air as Cullen's soldier's began attacking the outer walls of the Warden fortress.

Cursing under his breath, he abandoned his horse, taking off on foot toward the main gates, ducking and weaving to avoid the sudden rain of Warden arrows filling the sky. He reached the bridge, catching sight of Cullen just as the Commander was returning from the main gates.

He ran up to him, breathless and angry, Cullen's face wide with shock and disbelief on seeing him there.

"Fenris? What... what are you doing here?"

"What do you think I'm doing here?" He snarled. "Was it your idea to leave me behind?"

"No...I..." He paused as screams filled the air, demons were falling from the walls and attacking Inquisition soldiers. "Perhaps we could discuss this another time?"

"No. Who gave the order?"

"The Inquisitor did... but it was Hawke's idea."

Fenris' face clouded in confusion before a cold mask descended over his features. "Where is Hawke now?"

"She's on the ramparts keeping my soldiers from being overwhelmed by demons."

"Thank you. Commander." He growled, taking off at a run across the bridge and into the keep.


	12. Doubts

Maker damn these stupid Warden's, Dorian swore for the hundredth time as another wave of shades rose from the floor. They were almost as bad as the blood magisters back home with their overblown sense of importance.

After he'd gotten over his anger of Fenris being left behind, the Inquisitor had taken him, Varric and Cassandra as her choice for backup in confronting Clarel. The Warden Commander was beyond reasoning with, sacrificing a fellow warden before the Inquisitor could stop her. That is until Erimond summoned Corypheus' dragon.

After they dealt with the pride demon, they took off after Clarel who had run off in pursuit of Livius, the cowardly Tevinter mage who was behind the destruction of the Warden forces from within.

\----xxx----

Fenris reached the upper courtyard, snarling at the warrior and rogue Warden's who he despised. They'd been too weak to do anything to stop their leader, even when it was clear she'd gone mad. It reminded him of Cullen and the rest of the Templar order who had also done nothing to curb Meredith's rampage, standing aside and allowing the tensions in Kirkwall to spiral out of control until it was far too late to do anything to stop it.

The Warden's shied away from him when he appeared but he ignored them, his attention riveted to the massive High Dragon circling the keep. He'd seen no sign of the Inquisitor's party and raced upwards assuming they'd gone to engage the beast, using his lyrium ghost power to move as quickly as possible. He reached the uppermost platform just in time to see the dragon leap over Clarel's bloody and broken body, it's weight crumbling the platform the Inquisitor's party stood on. He watched in horror, heart in his throat as one after another the Inquisitor's companions fell from the ramparts.

He raced to the platform's edge desperate to help, catching sight of Dorian's flashy robe as he fell beyond the elf's reach. His heart screamed a broken no and a flash of green light filled his vision. He blinked and could see no sign of anything on the rocks below. Shaken and trembling, be backed away from the edge, his mind clinging to the green light he'd seen. Was it possible? He didn't know, but it had looked as though the Inquisitor had opened a door into the Fade. Overcome by the idea that he may have just lost his friends, he clung desperately to the shred of hope the Fade light promised and returned to the courtyard where the only rift still sparked angrily with green energy. He sank to the ground, hugging his knees to his chest, staring into the undulating light of the rift as it snapped and hissed in the air above him.

His lyrium markings flared painfully so near the anomaly but as he watched it he swore he could hear voices. Closing his eyes, the voices became louder until he was certain he heard first Varric and then Hawke, speaking. He inched closer and this time heard Cassandra and Stroud, then the Inquisitor and someone else whose voice he couldn't identify. He was joined by more of Cullen's forces as the mage Warden's fell alongside their demon thralls. Then Cullen was at his side, watching him with a puzzled look on his face.

"Fenris? Might I ask what it is you're doing? Where's the Inquisitor?"

"I'm listening. I think they're in the Fade."

"What?! They're in the Fade? And you can hear them? How is that possible?"

Fenris scowled and Cullen took a breath, relaxing his shoulders.

"I don't know how it's possible, but it is. They somehow all fell into the Fade or the Inquisitor took them there, but it seems they're looking for a way out. I assume that means they are on the other side of this rift and will be here shortly."

"Are they in danger?"

Fenris scowled again and Cullen clamped his mouth shut. "It is the Fade. Of course they're in danger, but the way is blocked by a powerful demon. I heard one of them call it the Nightmare."

"Is there anything we can do to help?"

This time the elf gave him a look filled with exasperation as Fenris blew out the breath he'd been holding. "Assuming it is a nightmare, I suppose praying and thinking positively couldn't hurt."

"Right. Of course." He nodded, feeling ridiculous for having voiced the question. "Also, I apologize on the Inquisitor's behalf. You have been nothing but an asset to our forces, you should not have been left out of this attack."

"Apology accepted." He said as the rift began to snap and pop with renewed energy.

Fenris got to his feet, sword gripped tight when something small and dark rippled through the green light and fell to the ground below in a heap. The figure got to their feet, dusted themselves off and stared up into the surprised eyes of Fenris and Cullen.

"Curly! Elf! Am I glad to see the two of you or what?" Varric smiled, eyes twinkling as he joined them.

"What happened?" Cullen asked before Fenris could reply.

"Her Inquisitorialness opened a rift and sent us all into the Fade. I'm not saying anything more until after I've had several ales. Possibly copious amounts of whiskey too."

The rift rolled again and Cassandra appeared, face flustered and her scowl deeper than any the trio had seen before. A moment later Hawke fell through, her gaze landing on Fenris, her cheeks flushing crimson before looking away and moving to stand by Varric.

Fenris felt his palms dampen and his heart thud as the minutes ticked by. Where was Dorian? The Inquisitor? Another minute passed and then both were standing there. Dorian's face ashen as the Inquisitor turned, aimed her hand at the rift and snapped it closed with a loud and angry pop. His feet were moving before he had time to think, Dorian's eyes lighting with pleasant surprise as he caught sight of the elf coming toward him. His arm slipped around the mage's waist, pulling him into a crushing embrace even as Dorian protested.

He ignored it, feeling the mage's body relax, his arms sliding around his own waist to hug him back.

"I thought I'd never see you again." He whispered into the mage's ear.

"The feeling is mutual." Dorian whispered back, his arms trembling, the only sign the mage gave of being shaken by the ordeal. "I'd kiss you, but the current atmosphere is decidedly too abhorrent."

"And I'd kiss you back if not for the audience we have." Fenris replied huskily, releasing him.

"A hug will have to do then." Dorian replied, the smile reaching his eyes.

They parted reluctantly, each expelling a sigh of relief when it seemed apparent no one had noticed their embrace. Fenris turned hooded eyes to Dorian as the Inquisitor addressed the crowd of Warden's who had gathered in the courtyard.

"Excuse me Dorian. I need to speak to Hawke before she leaves." He said, hurrying after the Champion who was beating a hasty retreat away from the crowd listening to the Inquisitor.

Dorian frowned and nodded, watching as the Wardens parted like a wave to give the elven warrior a wide berth. What he wouldn't give to hear that conversation, he mused catching Varric's amused stare. He moved to the dwarf's side just as the Inquisitor made the Wardens her allies.

"Maker's breath. The inner circle is going to have a field day over recruiting the Wardens." Varric huffed, noting the venomous look Cassandra, Vivienne and Solas were giving their leader.

"She doesn't shy away from making controversial decisions does she?" Dorian agreed, his thoughts more preoccupied with what Fenris was saying to Hawke.

"Not that I've noticed, no. Speaking of controversial and might I add unexpected, did I see you and Broody hugging a moment ago?"

"I don't know what you're talking about Varric."

"And I suppose I didn't see him storm after Hawke like he was ready to spit wyvern venom."

"That last part might hold a bit of accuracy. Were you aware it was Hawke who suggested leaving him behind at Skyhold?"

"What? No! Why would she do that?"

"I've heard one version, but I imagine Fenris is learning the truth about it as we speak."

"Glad I don't have to referee that particular disagreement. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed my time in Kirkwall with Hawke, but the bickering that went on between some of them would drive a person to drink."

"It's my understanding it did drive you to drink. Frequently." Dorian smirked as they followed their illustrious leader out of the courtyard.

"No more than before I met Hawke." Varric chuckled. "At least with Hawke I always had good stories to tell while I did it."

"Interesting benefit."

"Ready to head back to Skyhold Sparkler?"

"More than ready. I've had enough of Warden hospitality to last a lifetime."

"You and me both."

\----xxx----

"What in Andraste's flaming ass were you thinking Hawke? I can't believe you told the Inquisitor to leave me behind on this!" Fenris shouted.

"I'm sorry Fenris. I just thought you wouldn't want to help Wardens, especially after what happened with Corypheus."

"And why was I singled out? Both you and Varric were there too. Don't tell me this was about blood magic and Wardens."

"It wasn't just about that. I was... concerned about you. Varric told me about Dorian."

"What about him? I thought you already knew about him back in Crestwood." Fenris was growing more angry by the minute.

"He's an Altus from Tevinter Fenris! I didn't know all that when I first met him. He's one step away from being a magister."

"You think I don't know that? You have no right to meddle in my affairs Hawke and no right to make decisions for me!"

"I was afraid you weren't thinking clearly. It seemed like you were moving too fast."

"It's not your place to make that call Hawke! This is not Kirkwall and you are no longer my leader or my keeper. You're supposed to be my friend, yet I didn't see you meddling in Varric's involvement with this place."

"You're right Fenris and I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done what I did. I was wrong. I don't expect you to forgive me but I am am sorry."

"Don't ever do it again Hawke."

"I swear I won't. But I do have to go." Hawke smiled, giving him a brief hug. "Take care of yourself Fenris. Maybe I'll see you in Kirkwall again someday." She said, dropping the argument.

"Be careful Hawke." Fenris replied with a huff as the first of the Inquisition forces started streaming past him and over the bridge.

"You too." She called, a smile on her face as she disappeared into the crowd.

Fenris turned to see Dorian's eyes on him and tensed. Was he wrong about the mage? Was he moving too fast or was he looking at Dorian because he represented what was familiar?

He broke eye contact and fell into step with the passing soldiers. He hated confrontations like what he'd just had with Hawke. It made him feel like he didn't know what he was doing and was making a fool of himself in the process. He knew Dorian would wonder at his behaviour, but he also knew it would do neither of them any good to talk now. Best he give himself time alone first. Besides, they'd have more time to talk back at Skyhold.


	13. Not in the Mood

Dorian wondered at the elf's odd behaviour all the way back to Skyhold, but he was content enough that it didn't worry him. Not because he didn't care but because of what had happened in Adamant. That the Inquisitor could open a door into the Fade was bad enough, but that she'd been able to bring all of them with her had been disturbing. No, he amended, it had been terrifying. At least being a mage he knew what the Fade was like and how dangerous it was. The rest of them had not. Certainly they'd been afraid, but none truly comprehended just how serious the situation had been.

He wasn't certain any of them understood how bad it was and it was worrying. The last thing they needed was word of their accidental trip to get back to anyone in the Imperium. His foolish and power hungry countrymen would see it as a challenge to repeat it.

\----xxx----

Back in Skyhold, the keep was a bustle of activity. While they'd been gone, several pressing matters had come up and the Inquisitor had her hands full. Fenris was still distracted by what Hawke had said and was in no mood to deal with anyone. He followed Bull, Sera and Blackwall to the Herald's Rest and joined them for a drink. By the time he left three hours later he was pleasantly numb and no longer concerned by his interest in Dorian. He knew himself well enough now that he was no longer in the habit of second-guessing his choices. He'd just been thrown off balance when he'd thought Hawke had seen something he'd missed. He shook himself over the doubt Hawke had stirred inside him. He knew he hadn't made a mistake. He never would have kissed the mage or sought him out the night he'd been hiding in the drafty tower if he hadn't been certain of the man.

It was still early when he found himself taking a walk on the ramparts, pausing when he heard Dorian's voice raised in anger near Skyhold's main gate. He couldn't hear what was being said as Dorian argued with a man dressed in Orlesian merchant's clothes. The argument ended and Dorian stormed back to the keep, face flushed, eyes stormy as he returned to the library. He was about to follow when Leliana appeared beside him, her eyes following Dorian's path across the courtyard.

"I know something about what you just witnessed." She said, catching his eye and handing him a note. "Perhaps you'd like to follow up on the matter yourself."

"Why are you involving me in this?" He asked, puzzled.

"Lord Pavus is a rather private man wouldn't you say? He might be more inclined to confide in a friend than the Inquisitor's spymaster."

"Perhaps."

"Then I shall leave the matter with you should you choose to know more. Good evening Fenris."

"Lady Nightingale." He said, inclining his head to her before turning his attention to the note.

Amulet? What amulet? He frowned a moment before recalling the customs of the noble houses of Tevinter and his eyes went wide with shock. Dorian had sold his Birthright? How badly had his family betrayed him if he'd been that desperate for coin? His assessment of the mage changed dramatically in that instant, leaving him more certain than ever his attraction to Dorian was genuine. Pocketing the note, he headed for the library. He had to know what Dorian had argued about with the merchant. He could guess, but he wanted to be certain first.

\----xxx----

Dorian was still fuming when he reached the library. He'd known he was making a mistake in selling the amulet, but he'd been desperate and angry. He'd wanted to hurt his father as much as he'd hurt him and had needed the coin more than the status the amulet granted him.

He was angrily shelving books in his alcove when he heard someone clearing their throat behind him. He huffed under his breath and ignored them, not caring who it was or what they wanted. At least he did until he felt a huff of warm breath on the back if his neck, making him shiver. He could feel the heat of the body behind him, smell the aroma of tart apples and cinnamon and felt his shoulders hunch.

"Fenris." He managed to say, relieved his voice wasn't as breathy as he'd imagined it would be. "Is there some reason why you're breathing on my neck?"

"I like the way you smell mage." He whispered huskily into his ear. Dorian felt the elf take a step back, feeling the loss of body heat and wishing for it's return.

"I'm sure you do." He replied, turning to scowl at him. "I imagine I'm quite the heady thing what with not having bathed in three days."

"You smell good enough to eat Dorian. Bath or no bath."

Dorian flushed crimson, the look on Fenris' face going straight to his groin. He appreciated the look, but he was, quite irrationally, not in the mood. He was also still irritated over a great many things, one of which was the warrior's incessant teasing.

"You delight in seeing me flustered don't you? Never mind." He snapped, cutting off the elf's response. "What do you want Fenris? I have a lot on my mind at the moment, the main one being my trip to the Fade. I know you don't see the importance or gravity of the situation given how you feel about mages but it is of great importance to me."

Fenris said nothing, leaning his back into a wall of books and crossing his arms over his chest. "You want to study it don't you?"

"What? Of course not! Why would you...? Oh, of course, now I see. I'm a mage, worse yet an Altus and damn the man, also from Tevinter. But of course I want to study it! All mages seek power after all, never mind the fact that I hate blood magic and the way the Magisterium is run. I was a fool to believe you felt anything for me wasn't I? Just a ploy to get close to me so you can cut me down should I show any sign of corruption."

"That's not true mage."

"Yes. Mage. That's all I am isn't it? All you see when you look at me. I can't believe I thought you were different for even a second. Though I've no idea why I'm surprised, people are always disappointing me. You'd think I would learn that." He ran out of steam then, his eyes filled with something painful and unreadable and then he was stalking away and gone before Fenris had time to process what he'd said.

Fasta vaas! How had this happened? He'd barely spoken and Dorian had launched into a tirade. It was obvious he was upset but he was certain it was about more than just the Fade. The amulet? Something else? He saw Leliana approaching and frowned.

"I had thought you and Dorian were more friendly now." She said amiably, leaning up against the rotunda railing. "What was all that about?"

Fenris grunted and joined her. "I'm not sure. He's upset about the Fade but there's something else bothering him. That was... unusual for Dorian."

"I agree. He hides his passion well but that was not like him. Do you know anything more about the amulet?"

Fenris laughed. "I haven't even asked him yet."

Leliana smiled. "I suggest giving him time to cool off then. I doubt he'll be in a sharing mood for a while."

"I appreciate the suggestion. I don't suppose you know anything?"

"Sorry, but I can't help you. My interest ended when I gave you the note."

"Very well, I think I'll head to the Herald's Rest then. Care to join me?"

"Thank you but no. Another time perhaps." She chuckled, heading back to the rookery.


	14. Hitting People with Sticks

Dorian's flight, for it was a flight no matter how he denied it, took him to the ramparts outside the newly renovated mage tower. He gazed down to the rocky cliffs below, wondering idly if his body would be recovered should he decide to fling himself off the wall in a fit of hysteria. After a moment, he concluded it unlikely, his body or parts of it being left frozen to the landscape like some hideous sculpture. That or become some wild beasts' next meal. He shook himself, marveling at the morbid path his thoughts had taken and sighed, his shoulders slumping with exhaustion. What kind he couldn't decide, whether mental, emotional or physical he felt drained in a way he'd never been before.

Blowing up at Fenris the way he had made his cheeks flame in embarrassment. He had no excuse and no reason for it which meant he owed the elf an apology. And if he had to explain his behaviour, he was certain it was simply because the elf had been standing there and therefore made an easy target. Apology and thank you, he amended with another hunch of his shoulders. He still hadn't thanked Fenris for the gift he'd left at his door. Kaffas, he was making a right mess of things and had no idea how to dig himself free of the hole he'd dug.

"You keep hunching over like that Vint and next thing you know you'll be a human sized turtle." Iron Bull chuckled as he neared the training yard.

"I'm merely conserving body heat." He frowned. "Care to explain why you have Cassandra hitting you with large stick?"

"Oh! Yeah! Come on Seeker! If I wanted to be tickled I would have asked Sera. Now come on, put some force into it and hit me!"

Cassandra growled and whacked him hard on the chest, knocking the qunari on his ass. She dropped the stick with a snarl and headed to the barracks. "Perhaps you can take over, I have work to do."

Dorian frowned at Bull, the qunari getting to his feet and holding the stick out to him. He took it, his frown increasing. "Why am I hitting you with a stick?"

"The Fade. Demon assholes, need it after all that Warden crap. Now shut up and hit me Vint."

"Alright." Dorian said, tightening his grip on the stick and smacking Bull in the chest with it.

"Oh! Yeah! Demon assholes! Who's afraid now! Who killed you!" He growled while Dorian continued to hit him. "That's right, I did! The Iron Bull killed you! Iron fucking Bull!"

Dorian whacked him a good one sending Bull sprawling to his ass again. "Does that really help?" He asked, extending his hand to help him up.

"Course it helps. You should try it sometime. Might help you lose that tension you're always trying to hide."

"I'll thank you not to hit me with a stick. I rather like not having bruises marking my skin."

Bull laughed, a deep hearty chuckle and clapped him on the shoulder. "That's not what I meant Vint. You're not wiry like the southern mages, you're toned, you keep in shape. I meant you should spar sometime, maybe with a short sword or a staff with a blade on the end."

"You mean hit someone with it and let someone hit me?" He gasped, sounding scandalized and not a little curious.

"Why not? You might need to know how someday. Maybe run out of lyrium in battle or maybe get silenced by a Templar. What would you do to defend yourself if that happened? Stand there and look pretty till someone ran you through?"

Dorian's instinct had been to reject the idea outright as ridiculous, but he'd seen what southern Templars could do. Had seen how defenseless and simple it was for them to kill a mage. And he had run out of lyrium several times in battle and likely would not have recovered enough mana in time if he'd been alone or outnumbered, rather than with non-mage companions at his side. It had occurred to him more than once what he would do in such a situation, but had no answer and had eventually brushed it off as unimportant. He was never without companions and the Inquisitor always had enough potions. Yet now the idea wasn't entirely without merit.

"Vint? You still here? I can hear you thinking."

Dorian scowled at the qunari. "You cannot possibly hear me thinking. You're making that up."

"Course I'm makin it up. But the way your forehad has gone all wrinkled tells me the same thing."

"Though I'm not inclined to have anyone trying to hit me on purpose, the idea does have it's appeal."

"Knew you see the logic of it." Bull said, bumping his shoulder.

"I suppose you know who I should test this theory of yours with then?"

"That's easy. Krem would be perfect seeing as you're both Vints, then go from there."

"Not you?"

"You're not serious." Bull dead-panned. "I said spar, not knock you on your ass with one hit. Besides, you're not going to face off against many who wield two-handed. Most of the guys we go up against are swords and shields or daggers."

"You've given this some thought."

"I lead the Chargers Vint. Kinda my job. Trained Dalish the same."

Dorian snorted. "I thought she carried a bow?"

"Bow, staff, makes no difference if you run out of arrows." Bull winked.

"Very well. I will try it and see if it's as cathartic as you claim. I trust you can arrange everything?"

"Sure Dorian. How does tomorrow after midday work for you?"

"Provided we aren't called away on a mission, it works just fine."

"Good. In the meantime, why don't you join me for a drink?"

"So long as you aren't going to trick me into drinking that vile concoction that burns after swallowing, I'm game."

"Good." Bull smiled, holding the door open for him and ushering him inside the tavern. "Cuz I'm pretty sure that broody elf of yours is already here."

Dorian froze, Bull bumping into him from behind as his feet rooted him in place. "On second thought..."

"Too late Vint." Bull whispered in his ear. "He's already seen you."

"Kaffas." Dorian swore for sure enough, his eyes locked with Fenris' his brow raised in question as he saw Dorian hesitate. "Now he'll think I'm avoiding him. Don't think I'm going to forget this Bull."

"You are avoiding him Dorian. Now get your sexy ass over there and apologize."

"I do not need advice from you." Dorian growled as they made their way across the crowded floor.

"No, you need a kick in the ass, but I don't want a fireball to the face. So quit stalling before I carry you over there."

"I hate you right now." Dorian hissed, moving away from the qunari and over to Fenris.

"Fenris." He nodded, his palms damp.

"Dorian."

His throat suddenly dry, he turned to Cabot and ordered himself an ale, taking a seat beside Fenris. He took a swallow of the bitter liquid before taking a deep breath and turning to meet his gaze.

"I need to apologize to you. I was inexcusably rude to you earlier and you didn't deserve it, you were not the cause. I'm sorry Fenris. I hope you can forgive my foolishness."

"I get the distinct impression you are deliberately trying to push me away." Fenris said, his voice calm.

"I... kaffas. I knew this was a mistake. I have no... experience with relationships and no excuse for my behaviour. Perhaps it would be best if we leave off with this ridiculous idea of yours to court each other?"

"No." Fenris shook his head.

"Why in blazes not?" Dorian huffed, exasperated. "I've done nothing redeemable to warrant this... pursuit."

"Yes you have, in Crestwood. But that's not why I said no."

"It's not?"

"I know what you're doing Dorian. Pushing me away so you can't be hurt. And I know that's what you're doing because I've seen it before. It's what I did in Kirkwall."

"So... what? You're trying your own patience just to see what it's like on the other side?"

Fenris laughed, the humour reaching his eyes. "I admit it's odd and infuriating watching you dance, humbling also, but no. I want to know you Dorian. Besides, you may have moments when you put your foot in your mouth, but you're also more eloquent than I ever was and you aren't as good at hiding your feelings as you think you are. I like it."

"So my bumbling about amuses you?"

"Very much."

Dorian huffed, indignant. "Then I will try to amuse you less and please you more."

"Does that mean you're going to stop listing all the reasons why we shouldn't see each other?"

"I can't promise that, but I will try. And although I normally have no trouble listing my finer qualities, I'm clearly inept at seeing myself the way you do."

"Good. Are you available for dinner tomorrow?"

"I... I'm not sure. I've agreed to test a theory of Bull's at midday. I'm uncertain what that might entail and I may either need an infirmary or a bath by dinner."

"What theory?" Fenris frowned, his mistrust of the qunari showing in his eyes.

"I'm going to be sparring in the practice ring with Krem. Bull believes it will help with... tension."

Fenris arched a brow. "And what made you agree to this bizarre arrangement?"

"Southern Templars and running low on mana. He suggested I might want another way of defending myself in case I'm unable to use magic."

Fenris grunted, surprised by the answer. "That's not a terrible idea."

"You don't like Bull much, do you?"

"No. He's qunari and Ben-Hasrath and his name means liar. You did not see what I did on Seheron and... other places. Such as what qunari do to people who refuse to convert or are deemed unworthy of the effort."

"But he's been honest about his role in the qun and has spent several years more Tal-Vashoth than Qunari."

"He's only done that at the behest of his superiors. He's trained for spying Dorian. For all you know he could have connections to the Imperium and be spying for your father."

Dorian paled at that thought and dropped his argument. "How did I miss that possibility?" He wondered aloud. "I suppose because all the conflicts happen far from where I am and I would have no cause to see it in person."

"You would not like it, I assure you. But it would give you pause in your blind trust of him."

"I'm not blind, but I do see your point. So, about dinner..?"

Fenris smiled, fixing the mage with a heated look. "I will wait until after your sparring match with your fellow Vint. I'm looking forward to seeing you work out."

Dorian flushed. He hadn't considered having an audience. "You're going to... watch?"

"Wouldn't miss it. Besides, if it's a true match, by the time it's half over you will have lost your shirt."

"My shirt?"

"Sparring is physical Dorian. You're going to be... hot."

"Kaffas. What have I agreed to?"

"I'm sure you'll be fine and easy on the eyes. No one will be criticizing your... form."

"You... bloody elf! Don't think I didn't miss those...innuendos of yours. Now you've gone and made me nervous. I can't drink this now, I think I'm going to be ill." He said looking forlornly into his mug.

Fenris laughed again and got off his chair. "You'll be fine mage. I'll see you in the morning."

"Of course you will." Dorian muttered, returning his mug to the bar.

"Would you like me to walk with you to your quarters?"

"Only if you promise not to mention that... thing I've agreed to do tomorrow."

"You have my word."

"Lead the way then."


	15. Haunted

Above the garden courtyard, Dorian put a hand to the warrior's waist, tugging him to a stop before kissing him lightly on the lips. Fenris sighed beneath his lips, pulling their bodies closer and kissing him back.

Dorian pulled away to find himself drowning in emerald eyes. "I wanted to thank you for the gift."

Fenris blinked, then flushed. "Oh, yes. That. I wasn't certain you would like it. Are you... have you read The Book of Shartan?"

Dorian felt a strange warmth in his chest at seeing Fenris flustered for a change. He smiled and kissed him again. "No. That book is not allowed in the Imperium and it's existence is denied. Though I have always wanted to read it."

Fenris returned his smile, some of the tension leaving him as he relaxed in Dorian's arms. "Another aspect of your rebellious nature I assume?"

"Of course. Anything forbidden is cause for insatiable curiosity. Though I looked, I was never able to find a copy. Can I ask where you found it?"

"It was a gift. From a friend in Kirkwall."

Dorian tensed, his brow furrowing. "A gift? And you're giving it to me? Why?"

"Because I wanted to give you something and of all the things I have, I thought it would be the most appreciated."

"Oh." Dorian replied a sudden lump in his throat. "Well it is appreciated. Very much and quite touching as well. I've never received anything like it before, so thank you Fenris."

"You're welcome Dorian." Fenris smiled, kissing him again and stepping out of his embrace. "Good night mage."

Dorian sighed, not hiding his disappointment. "Good night Fenris."

\----xxx----

Dorian woke early, suffused with a warm happiness he was unaccustomed to feeling. He'd fallen asleep thinking of an appropriate thank you gift for Fenris and believed he'd finally found it. He dressed and went to see if the warrior was up yet, hoping to escort him to breakfast. He knocked on the door but no one answered. He was about to move on, when he heard muffled gasps and what sounded like thrashing.

Alarmed, he eased the door open with an apology on the top of his tongue if the elf was merely dressing, but froze when he opened the door. Fenris was thrashing, still asleep, the bed-sheets tangled around his arms and legs, a sheen of sweat on his skin. Dorian closed the door, rushing to the warrior's side but paused, unsure what to do.

It was clear the elf was caught in some terrible nightmare. Touching him in his current state could be dangerous. After a moment he decided to try tugging the sheet off since it seemed Fenris was fighting it as though he were restrained. Carefully and without touching him, Dorian removed the sheet first from the elf's legs and then his arms. The elf was dressed in only his breeches and Dorian was struck by the sight of the tattoos on his body. More specifically, he was overwhelmed by the beauty and intricacy of the pattern and the reality of how much pain it would have caused.

Fenris' struggles had slowed and he was now whimpering, muttering protests in Arcanum. Dorian's heart squeezed painfully as he spoke to calm him. "Fenris? Fenris can you hear me? It's Dorian, wake up, you're having a nightmare."

_"No, please Master. I can't. It hurts. I'll be a good slave. Please don't take me like that again. I'm sorry."_

Dorian's eyes welled with tears at the raw pain and fear in Fenris' voice. He settled himself on the edge of the bed, swallowed the lump in his throat and tried again.

"Fenris? It's Dorian. You're safe now. Come on, it's only a nightmare, you just need to wake up."

Fenris' body stilled as his breathing slowed at his words. After a moment, he blinked his eyes open, confusion settling in them when he caught sight of Dorian.

"Dorian? What are you doing here? Where are my bed sheets?" He demanded, sitting up but still sleep fogged so his voice held no anger.

"I was hoping to escort you to breakfast, but I heard you talking and came in. You were having a nightmare so I woke you. It seemed like a bad one."

"Nightmare?"

The elf looked so lost and helpless, Dorian retrieved the blanket from the floor and handed it to him.

"Yes. A nightmare." Dorian nodded, not wanting to say what he'd heard.

Fenris frowned, his body tense as he scowled at the mage. "I don't remember."

"That's just as well. I'll go now and let you dress. See you at breakfast?" He asked, moving to the door.

"Dorian, wait."

Fenris was still scowling, looking at him through his hair again when he turned back.

"Yes?"

"Did I... did I say anything?"

Dorian returned the warrior's look. "You did. But perhaps you'd like to discuss it later? Or, we could never speak of it again."

"I... I think we should talk. But you're right, we can do it later."

"Then I will see you later." He nodded, slipping outside and closing the door behind him.

As he made his way to the great hall he wondered how often Fenris had suffered these nightmares and whether or not he'd ever spoken about them to anyone else before now.


	16. Hesitating

Fenris dragged a shaky hand over his face after Dorian had left. Despair filled him while traces of the fear generated by his nightmare sent icy shivers up his spine. The details of the nightmare were gone, but he knew there was only one thing which would cause him to cry out in his sleep.

Heaving himself out of bed, he dressed, pulling his armour into place with anger. It wasn't so much that Dorian had heard him but that he'd had the nightmare at all. Danarius was long since dead, almost four years and he hadn't had one that bad in half as many years. There was no reason for it and it angered him to be ambushed in his sleep. It made him weary and despondent that he would ever be free of the chains of his slavery.

\----xxx----

"Sparkler. You're up early. Where's your broody elf?"

"Getting dressed I imagine." Dorian said absently as he settled at Varric's table.

"Something happen? I thought the two of you might be having breakfast together this morning."

"I'm sure he'll be joining us soon. As for what happened, I don't think he'd appreciate anyone knowing."

"You sure? I might be able to help."

Dorian sighed, picking at the food on his plate. "He had a nightmare."

Varric stopped smiling and looked uncharacteristically serious a moment later. "Oh. Guess I can't be any help then, though I suggest that if he wants to talk about it, let him. If there's one thing I know about the elf it's that the last thing he needs is to pretend it didn't happen."

"And if he doesn't want to talk about it?"

"Give him a day or two. If he doesn't bring it up, you'll have to."

"Kaffas. I'm still not certain this entire thing is wise. I'm afraid my involvement with him is only making his life worse. I've done nothing to warrant this attraction he seems to have and I'm altogether awful at relationships."

"You'd rather be alone and you're not at all attracted to him?" Varric pressed.

"No, I don't want to be alone, and yes I'm attracted to him, how could I not be? But that's not the point."

"So what is?"

"I'm... not sure. But I don't think getting involved with a mage from Tevinter is healthy either."

"You tell him that?"

"Not in so many words, but yes I have. He didn't think it was important."

"Ah Sparkler. Let him make up his own mind. I'm sure you understand what it's like to have someone else making decisions for you. If it's a mistake, he'll figure it out on his own and if its not, it might be good for both of you."

"I see I'm not going to get any support on this." Dorian sighed.

"Nope. You could ask someone else but I think the answer would be the same."

"Fine. But if he has another nightmare, I'll be rethinking this. I don't want to be the cause of anyone's lack of sleep, least of all his. I think he's suffered enough already." Dorian said, getting up from the table. "If you'll excuse me, I have some research to do."

"Not gonna finish your breakfast?"

"No. I seem to have lost my appetite."

Varric watched him go and turned as Fenris approached his table. He'd seen the elf enter but hadn't said anything, curious what Fenris was be up to.

"He told you didn't he?" Fenris grumbled, snatching a roll from the table as he sat down.

"Well good morning to you too Broody. He just said you had a nightmare."

"Of course he did." The warrior sighed, taking an angry bite from the roll he held.

"How much did you hear?"

"Enough."

"You know he's only worried about you."

"I do not need his worry. It's nothing."

Varric scoffed. "Sure it isn't. When was the last time you even had a nightmare?"

"It has nothing to do with Dorian."

"Then what do you suppose triggered it? I thought the bad ones ended after the Chantry business in Kirkwall."

"They did."

"So? Why now?"

"I'm not certain, though I have a theory. I just wish Dorian hadn't seen it."

"I get that, but maybe he could help? He's a mage, he might know more about the Fade and your lyrium tattoos than the mages down here." Varric paused as Fenris' face clouded. "Come on elf, I know you don't like mages but you like Dorian right? It's just a suggestion and he could help you."

"I do not want Dorian burdened with this."

Varric frowned. "One of these days you're going to have to let someone help you. Wouldn't it be better if it was someone you like being around?"

"I see your meddling hasn't changed since Kirkwall." Fenris grumbled. "But maybe you have a point. I will think about it."

"Well good. If you're looking for Sparkler, he's gone to the library. Said he had some research to do."

"In that case I will let him work. See you later Varric."

"Sure thing elf."


	17. Daggers and Swords

Fenris left Varric and headed outside to the training yard. It was inevitable that he would need to discuss what happened with Dorian at some point, but for now he wanted to talk to Bull. He still didn't trust the qunari but he wanted to know more about Dorian's upcoming sparring match. It weighed on his mind that the mage would be out of his league and didn't want to see him hurt. Plus it gave him a reason to speak to the big oxman and learn what he could about him.

"So you're the broody elf that's got the Vint all tied up in knots?" Bull teased as he joined him at the railing surrounding the training area.

Fenris huffed but said nothing.

"Talkative aren't you? So what brings you out here, something I can do for you?"

"Dorian told me about the training idea you had."

"He did huh? Well like I told him, it can't hurt to be prepared."

"True enough. How exactly is this going to work? Dorian has never trained as a warrior and knows nothing of hand to hand combat."

Bull gave him a curious look and shrugged. "Just basic stuff to start. Proper way to hold a weapon, foot placement, balance. Once he knows that he can try a few practice rounds with Krem."

"Sounds reasonable." Fenris agreed.

"What about you elf? Wanna go a few rounds with me? We use the same weapon style after all, though I've never seen an elf use a two-handed weapon before. That sword of yours is bigger than you."

"It's what I was trained for." Fenris retorted.

"I get that. Mind if I ask why?"

"More intimidating to... enemies." Fenris said, tripping over his omission of the word Master.

"Just didn't expect a Magister would ever let a slave near a weapon like that, much less carry one."

Fenris bristled. Did everyone know?

"Well he did."

Bull eyed him knowingly. "So he did. Well, what do you say? Care to go a round with me?"

"I have killed my share of qunari and Ben-Hasrath. You aren't afraid I might mistake you for an enemy? How's your control over your bloodlust? For I will not hesitate to kill you if you cannot control it."

"Don't worry about me. My control is fine. As for being qunari, well... I was on Seheron. I know what it was like."

Fenris scowled. He'd known the Bull had spent time in Seheron. Anyone who had, had a look to them. A haunted thing, buried deep but visible if you knew what to look for, and Bull was entirely too calm, too rational and too easy-going to not have spent time in brutal battles.

"And I saw enough of the bloodshed after one of your kind lost themselves to the rage to never wish to see it again."

"You got nothing to worry about elf. Nowadays only dragons bring that on and even then, it's rare." Bull retorted, his voice hard. "Now, you wanna do this or not?"

"Alright. What are the rules of engagement?"

"Blunt weapons, no magic. When one of us has had enough, just say yield."

"And if neither of us yield?"

"Then it's over when one of us can't get back up."

"Very well. Let's get started."

Bull laughed. "Oh this is gonna be good! Krem! Set us up! The elf's agreed to spar with me."

\----xxx----

Once Dorian made it to the library, he'd set about searching the shelves for anything he could get his hands on regarding the Fade and known uses for lyrium. Within an hour, he was fully engrossed in a tome titled, _Lyrium: The Voice of the Maker_. It wasn't a spectacular source of information, but everything from weapons to clothing had at some point been enhanced with the properties of lyrium. He stopped, his breath catching when he came across a short reference to Fenris' markings. Short, but informative, he felt a pang of anger wash through him. Just imagining the amount of pain Fenris must have experienced was overwhelming. That he had survived was a miracle and he wondered if the warrior still experienced pain.

He started, his eyes snapping up with a curse at the thought of pain, remembering the request he'd made of Vivienne. He put aside the books he'd found and went in search of the Orlesian mage. He found her in her usual spot, high above the main hall, engrossed in a book on Chantry circles. He didn't agree at all on her views on southern mages, but he respected her integrity and her skills as a healer.

"Lord Pavus." She said, setting aside her book. "To what do I owe the pleasure of your company?"

He knew she was merely playing the Game and if she ever enjoyed his company, he was a nug's uncle. "My dear Lady Vivienne. I just remembered the request I made of you when we were in Crestwood. I wondered if your offer to teach me healing magic was still available?"

"Of course darling. Are you available now? We could practice here or in the mage tower if you prefer. It will be simple magic to start, though it does require a lot of concentration."

"Here would be fine." Dorian agreed, settling himself across from her.

"You're certain you want to do this now? The spells aren't difficult but they are taxing. Don't you have some barbaric sparring match scheduled for this afternoon?"

Dorian swore silently. "I admit I'd forgotten about that, though I'm sure it won't be a problem. I'd like to start right away, if it's all right with you?"

"It's fine darling. To start, bring your palms together like so." She said, cupping her hands and bringing them forward to face each other. "Now, sense the power there and using your connection to your magic, find the bit that's connected to your soul."

Dorian frowned and did as she instructed.

"Very good. You have it?"

He nodded, concentrating.

"Now follow that feeling to your heart centre. Feel around a bit, you need to locate the parts which represent both empathy and compassion."

"Alright." He said as a bead of sweat appeared on his forehead.

"Good. Now find a small pain in your physical self. Visualize this magic having a green glow about it and gently send it to the place you want healed."

Dorian did as she instructed and felt a cool warmth spread along his spine. It was stiff from sitting for so long with his head bent, but as the healing spell touched him, it vanished.

"Well?" Vivienne prodded. "How do you feel?"

He smiled, feeling triumphant. "My back is better. Not stiff like it was before."

"And how was the magic itself? The casting of it?"

"It was interesting. It's in direct contrast from my specialization, but it felt complimentary, though also counterpoint to what I'm used to."

"They are similar darling." She smiled, looking pleased. "Though reanimating the dead is more a like wielding a blunt instrument, healing is much gentler. Like a summer breeze or a trickling stream. The difficulty is control. Healing magic cannot be wielded, it must be coaxed and encouraged. It must also be done only when the caster themselves are calm and at peace. It won't work at all if a mage is troubled or emotionally compromised."

"That makes sense." Dorian nodded.

"Now, given your nature, I recommend spending at least one hour per day clearing your mind and thoughts of all emotion. The practice will help stabilize your mind and enhance your control over healing magic. Eventually it will become second nature for you to access it. It will allow you to remain calm in even the most trying of situations, especially in the heat of battle."

"So it's about stamina and control?" Dorian frowned.

"You have plenty of both Dorian." She said sternly. "But you need practice detaching from your more emotional nature. And don't try to deny it, I was there when we took down that dragon in Crestwood."

Dorian flushed, clamping his mouth shut on the protest which had been on the top of his tongue. He was about to say something else when a loud cheer sounded from outside the keep. Sharing a look with Vivienne, they rose and moved to the balcony to see what was going on.

Dorian looked down to see a large crowd had gathered around the training field to watch a sparring match. Though not unusual, he felt a touch of alarm wash over him when he caught sight of the competitors.

"Fasta vaas."

"Seems your elven friend has decided to test himself against our resident qunari. How very... Ferelden." She sniffed.

"If you'll excuse me Lady Vivienne? I think I'd like to get a closer look."

"Of course, don't let me keep you. Do remember what I said about clearing your mind. I expect you to cast your spell faster next time we meet."

"I won't forget." He called as he hurried down the stairs.


	18. No Shirts

What the bloody blazes was that damnable elf thinking? Bull was a monster, easily outweighing him a dozen fold. Was this because of the nightmare he'd had or was it something else? No, he thought as he neared the crowd of onlookers, more likely the Bull had challenged Fenris, though why was beyond him, as was Fenris' agreement to it.

As he drew closer, edging his way to the front, he could hear them taunting each other.

"I said no magic elf."

"I'm not using magic." Fenris retorted.

"You went all glowy. How's that not magic?"

"It's part of my defenses. You expect me to fight you without it?"

"I expected you not to cheat."

"It's not cheating. It's leveling the field. Your reach is twice as long as mine, or do you want to ensure your own victory with more of an advantage than you already have?" Fenris sneered.

"You're fast and I'm big. How much more level do you want this to be?"

"Fine." Fenris agreed and Dorian detected the triumph in his voice. "I won't use my markings to move faster. Though I expected you to want a challenge, not a stroll in the park."

"Ugh! You're going down elf."

"Not by your hands I'm not."

Dorian had finally reached the front of the crowd. Bull and Fenris were both naked from the waist up, circling each other like angry predators. Bull let his bulk intimidate, making it seem as though he were bored as the elf moved around him. In contrast, Fenris was all taut muscle and light of step. The muscles on his back and shoulders tight and well defined as he held his sword slightly down and out to the side. His eyes flicked everywhere, noting every twitch and every alteration in balance the qunari made.

All eyes were on the elf. His small stature contrasting greatly with both the size of his opponent and his own weapon, making it seem as though anyone watching were seeing things. Yet everyone drew a collective breath when Bull brought his great-sword down in a wide sweeping arc, hoping to catch the elf off guard. As though made of wind, Fenris danced out of reach, landing a glancing blow to the qunari's shoulder as Bull tried backing away.

"What's the matter? Too fast for you to see? Want me go slower so you can catch me next time?" Fenris taunted, once again moving out of reach of Bull's next swing.

"You're not fast elf. You're scared I'm going to beat you in front of everyone here."

"You've yet to land a single blow the Iron Bull. So far all I've seen is hot air."

Bull stayed silent, bringing his sword in another arc towards the elf but at the last minute turned it into a spinning attack. Fenris leapt away, ducking under the sword's path and moving across the field to Bull's back.

When the qunari's initial attack failed, Fenris slapped the sword in a downward slash, then angled the weapon to catch Bull in the side.

"You're good. For an elf." Bull grunted, advancing on him.

"Better than you." Fenris retorted, never taking his eyes from Bull's face.

"So you think."

"So I've proven. You still haven't hit me."

Dorian felt his palms grow damp. He'd seen both warrior's fight and both were skilled and dangerous, but Bull was larger and more formidable. Without using his lyrium markings, he didn't see how Fenris was going to win this.

"That's going to change elf."

"Prove it."

Bull growled as he brought his sword cleaving through the air once more. Again he changed the trajectory and again Fenris danced away, but this time took a glancing blow to the back of his leg and Dorian's heart jumped.

"Told you." Bull chuckled.

"I know what you're doing qunari. I've seen it before."

Bull said nothing, once again advancing on the elf and then both were too busy avoiding each other's weapon to waste time on words. Half an hour passed and neither were showing signs of yielding.

"Give up yet?" Bull asked while they caught their breath.

"Never. You?"

"Just thought I'd be nice about it before I knock you on your ass."

"Well come on then, if you're so sure of victory. What are you waiting for?"

Though the battle was practice and had more to do with testing each other, Dorian did not want to see Fenris fail. It was important somehow, he could see something in the elf's eyes, a flicker of need or possibly a reassurance of his skills. It was as though by agreeing to not use his lyrium ability, he wasn't just testing his skill, he was reclaiming something he'd lost. The fight continued, each opponent tiring with every swing of their sword. And then Fenris tripped, falling forward with his legs sprawling with Bull closed on him from behind. The crowd fell silent, waiting for the end when Fenris was suddenly on his feet, his sword raised, coming up inside Bull's personal space and halting his blade an inch from the qunari's throat.

"Do you yield?" He hissed.

Surprise filled the Iron Bull's face as he dropped his sword and nodded. "I yield."

The yard erupted in shouts and cheers as Fenris lowered his weapon and stepped back. He was breathing hard, sweat running in rivulets down his face and torso as he smiled at the watching crowd.

Bull retrieved his weapon and moved to shake hands with the elf. They nodded to each other before Bull clapped him on the back and announced that drinks were on him. Dorian felt an odd surge of pride wash through him as he watched the elven warrior collect his discarded tunic and hand off his blunted sword. It was as he stepped out of the training field when his eyes locked on Dorian's.

Dorian smiled as Fenris made his way toward him, throwing his tunic over his shoulder after using it to wipe away the damp sweat clinging to his forehead. Fenris grinned, his earlier distress from the morning replaced with jubilation.

"Come to give me a winner's kiss?"

Dorian flushed. He couldn't help it. The scent of the man was overpowering and it was all he could do to keep his arousal in check. "I came to make sure you walked away in one piece."

Fenris squinted his eyes, adjusting the tunic which had slipped off his shoulder and which Dorian couldn't help but stare at. "Doubting my skills?"

Dorian licked lips which had suddenly gone dry. "I was doubting Bull's restraint, I know he likes to put on a good show."

"And did he?" Fenris asked, running his hand through his sweat-dampened locks, making Dorian itch to move it away from the warrior's eyes.

"I think the audience was paying more attention to you actually."

Fenris' mouth quirked. "Jealous?"

"Only if you're planning to date them."

Fenris chuckled. "Don't worry mage. Right now I'm only interested in the exotic."

"Not into local fare?"

"Not especially."

"Mmm." Dorian nodded as they headed back to the keep. "Are you planning to put your shirt back on soon?"

"Does it bother you?"

Dorian made a face. "It's distracting."

"That's not what I asked Dorian."

"Fine. Yes, it bothers me. I do not want to become any more of a spectacle than I already am." He snapped.

"And how would you make a spectacle of yourself?" The elf growled in his ear.

Dorian swallowed. "I would kiss every inch of bared skin on you, starting with your lovely neck."

"And then?" He asked huskily, holding the door to the public bath open.

Dorian blinked, the elf's eyes fixing him with a look so filled with heat, he forgot the question. "And then? And then I would kiss your shoulders, caress your arms, and kiss my way down your chest and abdomen."

Fenris smiled at him, his eyes filling with promise as he led them beneath the keep, where the Inquisition had discovered a natural spring and had it converted to a public bath. There was no one else there so Fenris moved to a low bench where he seated himself and began undoing the laces on his breeches.

"What are you doing?" Dorian asked, alarmed.

"I think it's obvious. I'm removing my clothes so I can bathe."

"Fasta vaas. You're insufferable."

Fenris paused in what he was doing, his thumbs still hooked on the waistband of his breeches. "What?"

"You... you kiss me, touch me, get me aroused and wanting, then you walk away and tell me you wish to discuss things over dinner. And now here you are removing your clothes and I'm supposed to stand here watching and am not allowed to touch?"

"I never said you couldn't touch." Fenris growled, peeling his breeches off in one smooth movement.

Dorian gaped as Fenris stood, revealing that he had chosen to forgo smallclothes that morning and was now completely nude. He stretched, the movement accentuating every muscle, every curve and dip and ending at the long hard line of his arousal. He stepped to the pool's edge and in a move that reminded Dorian of a slow slide of melting ice, he slipped beneath the water's surface.

"Well?" Fenris asked, arching a brow at him. "Are you going to join me or not?"

"I... I can't." Dorian stammered, wishing he'd forgotten where he was meant to be.

"Why not?"

"I have a... a sparring match to get to."

"I think you're stalling."

"I am not stalling... I'm merely... keeping my promises."

"You just yelled at me for letting you look and not touch and now you don't want to?"

"I want to. Maker do I want to Fenris, never doubt that, but... I don't want this to be rushed either."

"Rushed?"

"Yes, rushed. I'm sure you've heard of it."

Fenris smiled. "Suit yourself, I was offering to help you take care of that little problem you've got there, but I agree. I'm not interested in rushing either."

Dorian had been on the the verge of tearing all his clothes off when Fenris said that last bit. "Vishante kaffas." He murmured. "Bloody Maker forsaken elf."

"What was that mage?"

"Nothing. I'm leaving now, enjoy your bath."

"Thank you, I will. Are you free for dinner this evening?"

"I think we need to discuss what happened this morning first."

"Venhedis." Fenris swore. "You would have to remember that now."

Dorian smirked. "That's what you get for teasing me. See you later?"

"I'll find you." Fenris promised, his words making Dorian shiver as he left the baths.


	19. Dorian's Not Bad

He cursed all the way back to the courtyard where Krem was already waiting for him. "There you are Vint. Thought you weren't going to show."

"I was... momentarily distracted." Dorian grumbled, stepping into the training area. "I thought Bull was going to be here."

Keen smirked. "Yeah the chief was supposed to be here and then he went and challenged your elf friend to a match. He's in the tavern drinking now."

"He's drinking? But he lost."

"The chief's funny that way, but really, he did what he set out to do, so to him it's a win."

"And what did he set out to do?"

"Test the elf's skills, get him out in the open, get him to stop hiding."

"I should have guessed there was a reason beyond getting sweaty." Dorian sighed. "So how is this going to work?"

"First we work on your grip. I thought we could start by using a plain, non-magic staff with a blunt blade tip."

"Sounds easy enough." Dorian nodded.

Krem laughed. "We'll see."

Krem handed Dorian a staff and had him work through different ways of swinging, blocking and making quick, sweeping slashes with the bladed end. Dorian did well with this part of the exercise. Having learned magic in Tevinter, he was accustomed to using a staff to defend himself.

Krem then had them move on to attacking each other while both used staffs. Krem was faster at getting past Dorian's defenses while the mage was more adept at sweeping blows and moving out of range.

"Pretty good Pavus." Krem nodded as he called a break. "Rest for a bit and I'll walk you through some easy moves with a sword and then we'll move on to blades. Once we've worked out where your skills are strongest, you can decide which weapon to you want to continue with."

"I'm assuming this has something to do with distance?"

"You catch on quick Vint. That's part of it sure, but it's also how much control you have over your weapon. Your sword or blade is an extension of you. If you can't control the weapon, it won't be of much use to you."

"Is that why qunari name their weapon of choice?"

"It's part of it, but any more than that you'd have to ask the chief."

"What's it like working for a qunari?"

"It's different, but he's not like what you see in Tevinter or Seheron. He hasn't tried to convert me and he's never quoted the qun at me."

"Still it must seem odd."

"It is. But the chief's been good to me and really there's nowhere else I'd rather be. Anyway, you ready to go again?"

"Certainly."

Krem started with a short sword, which Dorian seemed to have a fair bit of control over. They went through a few paces before moving on to blades. Krem did the same thing with the blades which Dorian seemed to have much more control over. He'd not been able to balance with a shield and was constantly leaving himself open to attack.

By the time they'd determined his weapon of choice, they were both sweating profusely and Dorian had removed the robe over his armour. They shared a drink of water before readying for the next round.

"Using blades..." Dorian sighed. "If I ever need to use them... kaffas, it's going to be messy isn't it?"

Krem laughed, slapping the mage on the shoulder. "That's why I like you Dorian, always thinking positive."

"How is getting covered in someone else's blood positive?"

"Cuz you're expecting to win before you start."

"Oh, yes well, I see your point then." He said, removing his shirt. "I feel unclean and I suspect it's only going to get worse. My clothes are sticking to me."

"You're not planning to disrobe in the middle of a fight are you?" Krem teased.

"Of course not. But we've been at this over an hour, I can smell myself. It's soaked into the fabric." He said, wrinkling his nose.

"Alright, alright... let's get this started then. You remember the moves I showed you?"

"Yes, I'm ready."

"Good cuz I'm not going to go easy on you."

"I certainly hope not."

\----xxx----

Fenris had finished his bath, berating himself for having forgotten Dorian's training scheduled for later that day. He was also annoyed he'd teased the mage enough that his words had aroused him, forcing him to take care of himself after Dorian left.

He retrieved his discarded clothes, slipping on his breeches for the walk to his quarters. He needed a change of clothes after his match with the Iron Bull. He slipped through the keep to his quarters, his thoughts on the match. He knew the qunari had baited him and knew it had less to do with his sword skill and more to do with his character. In another time and another place it might have bothered him, but here he found he just didn't care. He reached his room and searched through his belongings for something to wear. He was about to pull on another set of leathers when he stopped, remembering the dinner. With a smile, he tossed the leathers aside and dug out one of the only dressy things he owned.

Dressed and clean, he left his room to speak to someone in the kitchen to arrange a dinner before heading out to the training yard.

\----xxx----

Dorian was breathing hard, sweat dripping from his brow while Krem continued to circle him. He was tired, sweaty and every muscle in his body ached. The mercenary had got in a few hits to his side and one leg and he could feel the bruises already forming. But he felt energized and exhilarated. There was a freedom and simplicity to wielding blades, unlike magic when he was forever anticipating, gauging and measuring both his opponent's next move and how much mana reserves he had left.

He still had to watch what Krem was doing, still had to gauge his opponent, but it was not the same. Krem took another swing and Dorian danced away, much like Fenris had done earlier. While Krem followed through on his swing, Dorian got in a hit to both his thigh and shoulder. He was spinning away, preparing for the next attack when Krem blocked his next slash, jarring his arm. He staggered and Krem took the opening and arched his swing low, tripping him.

Next thing Dorian knew he was lying flat on his back staring straight up, unsure how he'd gotten there. Krem leaned over him, a bright smile on his face as he offered him a hand up. "Not bad for a mage." Krem said, helping him to his feet.

"Not bad except that I lost." Dorian grumbled.

"Lasted longer than I expected. Thought you'd run out of steam half an hour ago. Thanks for the workout Vint."

"Well, you're welcome I suppose. At least I didn't embarrass myself too badly."

"Practice will improve your technique if you want to continue."

"I admit I enjoyed this up until you won."

"As did I. Wanna set something up for once a week?"

"Sure. I can't possibly get worse."

"Good. See you later Vint."

Dorian nodded, bending to retrieve his discarded clothes and froze when he felt someone's eyes on him. Looking up, he couldn't stop from gaping at the sight of Fenris staring back at him. The warrior was dressed in a loosely fitted navy blue silk shirt, streamlined black coat with gold piping at the edges and midnight black pants. He was so struck by the sight of him, it was several minutes before he realized the elf had spoken.

His feet were moving him towards the elf without his awareness until they were only feet apart. "I'm sorry, did you say something?"

Fenris smiled, his eyes lingering on Dorian's naked chest. "I said, you did well for a mage's first time without your magic, and you seem to have lost your shirt." He added, letting him see the heat in his eyes.

Dorian blushed, the elf's gaze pulling things tight in his groin. "Yes well, I was hot."

"You're always hot mage. And this is good look for you given your penchant for enjoying being on display."

Dorian flushed, his brow pulling down. "You're not suggesting I alter my wardrobe to expose more of myself? It's too cold for that."

Fenris smirked. "Depends how hot you are."

Dorian raised a brow, lips parting. "You're openly teasing me. In public, while I'm...”

"On display."

Dorian's face flushed, his mind going to other things that could be on display. "You... you..." He sputtered.

"I meant it Dorian. You did well today, I'm proud of you."

If he hadn't already been completely flustered Dorian would have had a witty retort ready, but hearing that the elf was proud? Of him? He was speechless. It surprised him to realize the elf's pride in him had more of a profound affect than when he'd heard it from his father. It was also doing things to his insides he wasn't entirely sure he wanted to think about.

"Oh? Well... I wasn't expecting that. Though I will take it as high praise coming from a skilled warrior such as yourself. Thank you for that Fenris." He said it with a smile, but the elf noticed the sudden closing down of his face. The mask was back. Why?

"You're welcome mage. But your mask is back. Is something wrong?"

Suddenly uncomfortable, Dorian changed the topic. "No, of course not. And forgive the change of subject, but why are you dressed like that?"

"I'm dressed for dinner. I came to give you directions." Fenris said, handing him a neatly folded parchment.

"Directions?" Dorian frowned as Fenris left the courtyard.

"Don't be late mage."


	20. Touched

After washing up and addressing the smattering of bruises on his skin, Dorian spent the next hour fretting over what to wear for dinner. Finally in frustration, he chose three outfits, closed his eyes and pointed. He ended up in a dark emerald shirt of softest velveteen, tucked into a pair of dark brown, almost black, brushed leather breeches. After pulling on his favourite black boots with silver buckles, he was ready and as nervous as a child on it's first day of formal lessons.

Following the note's directions, he left the keep and headed down the stairs to the main courtyard. He kept walking, past the horse stalls and up towards the back entrance to the kitchens. Ignoring the stairs, he headed toward a small, sheltered alcove. Stepping though the stand of trees, he came out into a small flat area looking around in wonder.

The space was small, but hidden from view unless you already knew it was there. At the centre was a small round table with a bright red table cloth and candles. Two chairs were set there, one occupied by Fenris. He looked up as Dorian entered the space, then rose and crossed to where he stood. Smiling, he took one of Dorian's hands, lifted it to his lips and kissed the back of it, never once taking his eyes from the mage. He then led him back to the table and they sat as Fenris poured out two glasses of dark red wine and passed him one.

Dorian was overcome. The entire scene was like looking at one of his own long forgotten fantasies. From the gorgeous elf seated across from him, to the location, the wine and the gesture. He was overwhelmed and felt a lump in his throat and was having a hard time accepting Fenris had done all this, gone to all this trouble, just for him.

"I'm glad you could make it." Fenris said, watching him as he sipped his wine.

"I'm glad you invited me." He replied, glad his voice didn't betray his distress. "How did you find this place? I had no idea a hidden spot like this existed inside Skyhold's walls."

"I have friends in the kitchen. One of them suggested it when I asked about arranging a small dinner."

"Well you've outdone yourself. I'm completely overwhelmed. Also, you look gorgeous dressed as you are, not that you weren't before, but the outfit suits you."

"Thank you. But you can't mean that other part."

"What other part?"

"The part about being overwhelmed. You're a noble, surely you've attended more than your share of formal banquets?"

Dorian smiled ruefully and stared at the plate before him. "True. Though they also entail blood sacrifices, assassinations, duels and poisonings. Wouldn't be a noble function in Tevinter otherwise."

"So every dinner was like that? I always thought it was an exaggeration. Surely not every dinner the nobles attended ended in someone's death?"

Dorian laughed, but there was no humour in it. "Unfortunately it wasn't an exaggeration. Someone always died. But let's not talk about that. What I meant to say is that no one has ever gone to all this trouble just for me."

Fenris frowned. "It was no trouble Dorian."

Dorian smiled but couldn't hide the glassy look in his eyes. "It means a lot to me Fenris. Thank you for this."

Fenris didn't miss how the mage was trying to hide just how much his efforts had affected him, but let it go. "We're just getting started." He smiled, uncovering the food tray sitting on a side table by his elbow. "Shall we eat?"

They ate in companionable silence, Dorian once more taken by the planning of their dinner and the reality that it had been Fenris behind it all. It wasn't that he was elven or a former slave, it was because he was gorgeous and soft-spoken and had chosen him of all people to court. They finished eating almost the same time and Fenris poured them another glass of wine.

"You looked stunning on the training field this afternoon." Dorian said, his eyes thoughtful.

"And you were a vision when you were sparring with Krem."

"A vision of sweat and hilarity you mean."

"Your efforts were very titillating Dorian." Fenris said, his voice husky.

"My efforts cost me a lot of bruises and humility. I didn't think it would be easy, but I hurt everywhere now."

"You didn't go to a healer?"

"No, why would I? It's not as though I was injured in battle."

Fenris shook his head. "You still need to function without pain. An injury is still an injury no matter how it's received"

"I never thought of it that way, though I did heal some of my more colourful bruises."

"Well that's a start." Fenris nodded, sobering. "I know this isn't the right setting for this, but you had asked about my nightmare."

Dorian looked at him sharply. "You don't have to talk about that now Fenris. Surely it can wait?"

The warrior shook his head. "I don't think it can. It may happen again and... I do not want to frighten you if it does."

"I was more concerned than frightened Fenris."

"You have to tell me what I said Dorian." Fenris said, sliding his hand across the table to cover the mage's hand.

A look of alarm passed over Dorian's face. "Is that really necessary?"

"By the look on your face, I think I have to know."

Dorian put his hand in his lap and looked away. "I think it was a memory. A rather painful one."

"Of Danarius."

Dorian nodded. "You seemed to think I was him when I tried to wake you."

"Venhedis. You are not him Dorian. It was a nightmare. I would've thought the same of anyone trying to wake me in that moment. What did I say?"

"You... were begging him to not do it again, that it hurt. You... promised to be a good slave and then you apologized."

"Kaffas." Fenris swore, his eyes clouding. "I had thought that ended years ago."

"You mean the nightmares?"

Fenris nodded. "I haven't had any for several years now. I thought I was finally rid of them. Varric told me what you said Dorian. This has nothing to do with you."

"I don't see how it's not related. What else could have caused this? No one else here is an outcast mage from Tevinter."

"I've thought about that and I think it was the rift at Adamant Fortress."

"What? Why? What happened with the rift?"

"When you were in the Fade, I was near the rift... and I could hear some of the people in your party talking."

Dorian frowned. "You could hear us?"

Fenris nodded.

"That's... a little disturbing. Any thoughts on how you were able to do that?"

"I think it might have something to do with my markings. My... powers allow me to become a ghost after all, which I assume has some connection to the Fade."

"I assume no one ever explained to you how that worked?"

"No. They did not. Though I suspect they didn't truly know either."

"Of course they didn't. Yes, let's experiment with magic we don't understand, we're mages, it's not as though we could destroy the world or someone's life." Dorian said bitterly.

"You really believe that don't you?" Fenris asked, curious.

"Of course I do. I'm not a monster. The ends never justify the means. I... I also wondered. Kaffas, this is harder than I expected. Do you... I mean, do your markings cause you pain?"

Fenris frowned. "They used to be near unbearable. And it hurts sometimes to be near a mage when they're casting."

Now it was Dorian's turn to frown. "And yet you want to be with me? And you work beside mages."

"It no longer troubles me."

"Well it troubles me. I don't like knowing my magic causes you pain Fenris. And I don't know how you survived receiving them. I..." He broke off what he was about to say.

"What?"

"If you hadn't already killed him, I would happily kill Danarius myself. As painfully as possible."

"I appreciate the sentiment, but it's not necessary."

"Yes it is Fenris. He was sadistic and cruel and did not deserve a clean end."

Fenris got up and crossed to the mage. Kneeling before him, he took Dorian's hands in his. "Thank you Dorian, you're right. He didn't deserve a clean end but he's dead now. He can't hurt me anymore."

Dorian frowned at him. "He may be dead Fenris, but he's still haunting your dreams. That's not nothing you know."

"I'm aware of that but I think I'm right about the rifts. I think I'll just have to stay away from them from now on."

"Maker, how are you so beautiful?" Dorian's eyes were moist as he brushed a stray lock from the elf's eyes. "It pains my heart that anyone could hurt someone with such a gentle soul."

Fenris felt his breath hitch at the unexpected compliment, and leaned up, pressing his lips to the mage's own, drawing a sigh of pleasure from them both. "You are a treasure Dorian Pavus." He whispered.

"You're going to break my heart aren't you?"

Fenris chuckled. "I will not. And you are entirely too suspicious."

"I've not had a lot of choice in the matter."

"You've never had anyone care for you like this? Not even your parents?"

"You know how things are in the Imperium. I'm an Altus, my parent's marriage was arranged."

"So they treated you like what then? A status symbol?"

"Not at first, no. But it changed eventually. Especially after they learned of my preference for men."

"I'm sorry Dorian. So tell me, what happened in Redcliff?"

"This again. I was hoping you'd forgotten that."

"How could I forget? It's what made me look for you the night I kissed you."

Dorian sighed. "Very well. I suppose it's only fair. You did tell me some of your own past. It was supposed to be a meeting with a family retainer. It was a lie of course, my father was there."

Fenris gripped Dorian's hands tighter. "What did he say?"

"He didn't apologize. He said he was doing what was best for me, as though he were doing me a favour by... curing me of my desire for men."

"Are you all right?"

"Not really. I told him he did it for what was right for him, for his fucking legacy. I... the Inquisitor thought I shouldn't leave it like that. I disagreed, but we talked and... and I don't think I'll ever speak to him again. I always hoped he wouldn't have gone through with it, but I think he would have if I hadn't found out about it first and ran away."

"I met your parents once." Fenris said quietly. "They attended one of Danarius' parties, but I didn't see you there."

Dorian paled. "It wasn't one of those... pleasure things was it?"

Fenris scowled at the memory and wondered again why he was telling Dorian any of this. "It was. From the look on your father's face he hadn't known that when he arrived. Your mother looked ready to set Danarius aflame when he announced the... entertainment for the evening."

“Venhedis. That man was too repulsive for words."

"Why weren't you with them?"

"My father despised Danarius, found everything he did to his slaves revolting and unspeakable. But there would have been other Magisters present, he needed to make an appearance so he wouldn't lose what little power he had. It was necessary if he wanted to have a voice against people like Danarius."

"And you?"

"Danarius was looking for an apprentice and my father knew he had his eyes on me. Danarius had already tried to convince me it was the best place for me to train, but I'd heard about his... tendencies and saw how he treated his slaves in public. I caught his eye once because I once stopped him from publicly flogging a slave who'd dropped the package she'd been carrying. He thought I was being entirely too compassionate and soft over something he saw as nothing more than an object."

"That was you?"

Dorian frowned. "What was me?"

"The slave you helped... she was a friend. She told me about what happened. She was so surprised anyone had tried to help her, she though she'd dreamt it."

"Did you believe her?"

Fenris frowned at his error. "I did."

"Why?"

"It's not important Dorian. I shouldn't have said anything." Kaffas! How was it possible that the mage from his past was the same man sitting across from him?

A look of horror passed over Dorian's face. "Sweet Maker, he didn't..."

Fenris said nothing.

"Kaffas! I try to help and all I did was make everything worse! He took out his anger for me out on you didn't he?"

Fenris cupped Dorian's faced in his hands, stilling the mage. "It doesn't matter now Dorian, what you did changed everything for me. Just knowing there was someone out there who didn't approve of him... it gave me hope that someday I'd be free of Danarius. I never forgot that day, you helped even if you can't see it."

"But..."

"I know it seems impossible, but after what you did, I thought more about my freedom. Danarius... before we went to Seheron he'd become more cruel, more sadistic. I believed myself to be invaluable, but during that time I was certain he would one day kill me. It was then I realized I did not want to die a slave."

Dorian sniffed as Fenris released him. "I don't think either one of us is very good with appropriate topics for dinner conversation."

Fenris laughed. "Perhaps not and yet I am enjoying myself anyway."

"Funnily enough, so am I. But in answer to your question, I wasn't in attendance because I'd been sent to another school for study."

Fenris returned to his chair and refilled their glasses. "Another school?"

Dorian smiled. "I was a terrible student. Always excelling in my classes, surpassing my instructors. I was constantly bored and it ended with my being expelled."

"Every school for the same reason?"

"No. Some of the other students found out about my secret and started taunting me. At first I was able to ignore it until I couldn't anymore. I cast a fireball at the leader of the little group. My father picked me up from school the next day."

"Is that when he found out?"

"I don't think so. If he did it wasn't from me."

"You haven't been happy for a long time have you?" Fenris observed, his voice thoughtful.

"You don't ever hesitate at saying exactly what's on your mind, do you?" Dorian frowned.

"I see no reason to. You do know you're allowed to be happy? That there's nothing wrong with you and that what your father did was a betrayal?"

"I'm not... Fine, yes. I haven't been happy, but how is it you're so knowledgeable on the subject?"

"Because I didn't know that myself when I was still in Kirkwall. A... mage pointed it out to me."

"Mmm yes. Evil mages once again being evil."

"Dorian."

"What? Sorry, couldn't resist. So what else did you have planned for tonight?"

"Tired already?"

"Far from it, I was just wondering if there was any dessert."

Fenris laughed. "What did you have in mind?"

"Something I can savour. Roll around on my tongue perhaps, something unique which I can savour."

Fenris growled. "Interesting. I had something similar in mind."

"At least we're on the same page."

Fenris got up, crossing to the mage to take him in his arms as Dorian rose from the chair. They embraced and Dorian kissed the warrior softly. Fenris responded by deepening the kiss, his hands going to Dorian's hips to pull him closer. Dorian moaned at the feel of the warrior's hard length pressed between them, his hand cupping Fenris' head while he traced the elf's lower lip with his tongue. Fenris moaned, Dorian releasing his lips to nibble lightly at his neck.

His heart raced when Fenris tilted his head to the side to allow him better access to the sensitive skin there. "Dorian." He whispered. "Don't stop."

His breath caught in his throat, muttering a hungry growl as he pressed kisses to the elf's neck and nuzzled his ear. His hands caressed the elf's back as Fenris leaned into his touch. Breathless, he pulled away, his heart skipping at seeing the Fenris' eyes dark with lust.

"There are entirely too many clothes between us. Might we move this elsewhere? Preferably somewhere with a bed?"

Fenris nodded, his gaze hungry. "I was thinking the same thing."

"Oh good. You're not going to just kiss me outside my quarters again are you?"

Fenris took the mage's hand in his and led him up the stairs to the kitchens. "No."

"No? That's all you're going to say?"

"Yes."

"Fine."


	21. Dessert

They made it to Fenris' room relatively unnoticed. The warrior set about lighting candles and Dorian, forgetting himself, flicked his wrist and cast a fire spell at the hearth to light it. Realizing what he'd just done, he turned to Fenris, an apology on his lips to find the elf smiling at him in amusement.

"I was wondering when you would do that."

"I'm sorry, I should have asked you first."

Fenris crossed the room and pulled him into an embrace. "Nonsense. You're a mage and besides, I wasn't looking forward to lighting it the usual way."

"But after what you said about your markings causing pain... and I didn't even think."

"Dorian, truly it doesn't hurt much anymore. It's fine." He said, capturing the mage's lips in a crushing kiss.

Dorian moaned, letting the tension drain from him as Fenris continued kissing him, as his hands went to the fasteners holding his shirt closed. His heart thumped as Fenris worked his way down, pulling his shirt free of his pants until it hung loosely on his shoulders.

The elf growled low in his throat and Dorian made a small whimpering noise when Fenris caressed his palm down his naked chest. He was certain the elf could feel his heart racing and pulled him closer. Fenris shrugged out of his coat, letting it fall to the floor and Dorian sighed at the feel of the soft silk, so thin he could feel every curve and muscle of the elf's back. With another growl, Fenris pushed Dorian's shirt off his shoulders and then he was putting his lips to the mage's neck, nuzzling him.

Dorian's legs trembled, his mind overcome with the sensation of Fenris' hands and mouth on his naked flesh. "Sweet Maker Fenris, please, I need you to touch me."

"Loose your pants mage." He growled, nibbling along Dorian's lower lip and raising goosebumps on his skin.

"I... just a moment." He said, fumbling at the stays. He managed to get them loosened, but before he could do anything more, Fenris had pushed them down past his hips. He lifted Dorian's leg and tugged first one and then another boot off, helping him step free of his clothes.

He gazed down at the elf who knelt before him, returning his gaze with his eyes filling with heat as he took in the sight of Dorian's arousal.

"Mage." He growled, breathless. "May I?"

Surprised and suddenly more aroused than before, he nodded. "Could you remove your shirt first?"

The elf complied, moving to position himself between Dorian's thighs. Just seeing Fenris in that position made his knees weak and he trembled when the elf put a hand on his hip, his other hand stroking his inner thigh. "Fasta vaas." Dorian hissed, drawing a pleased smile from the elf.

And then Fenris' mouth was on him, his tongue flicking over the head of his arousal and drawing a sigh of pleasure from him. He felt his legs tremble and buried his hand in Fenris' hair to steady himself. The elf sensed it and gripped his hip tightly to steady him. He continued to suck, licking his way up and down Dorian's shaft drawing pleased moans and sighs from the mage above him.

Dorian was lost to the feel of the warrior's hot, wet mouth on his member. He couldn't remember feeling anything so wonderful before and never wanted it to end. He could feel the pressure building in his groin and cried out his reluctance at having it end.

"Fenris...I can't... I'm not going to last..."

"Come for me mage, I want to see your face." He growled, keeping his lips loosely wrapped around Dorian's length while tracing his tongue along his shaft.

Dorian cried out, his hips moving in needy thrusts while Fenris held him in place with his hands and mouth. "Fenris!" He cried, his body jerking forward as his orgasm hit with ferocity, the feel of Fenris swallowing around him bringing tears of wonder to his eyes. He faltered then and would have fallen had Fenris not been there to catch him. Picking him up with ease, he settled him on the bed while Dorian came back to himself.

"Maker's breath Fenris, that was... extraordinary."

"You liked it then?"

"Liked it? I've never experienced anything so amazing in my life."

"I am pleased to hear it."

"Not yet you're not." Dorian growled as Fenris removed his breeches and held himself over Dorian's naked form. "Now it's your turn."

In a movement Fenris hadn't anticipated, Dorian reversed their positions and straddled him. Fenris gazed up in awe, startled by the naked lust in Dorian's eyes. The mage settled himself between the his legs, leaning over him to place soft kisses on his chest. Fenris arched into his touch, gasping aloud when a tongue flicked over a sensitive nipple, making his cock twitch.

"Like that do you?" Dorian whispered huskily as he flicked a tongue over the other sensitive nub.

"Dorian." Fenris groaned, his hips bucking upward, seeking friction.

"Impatient aren't we?" Dorian sighed as he began kissing his way down Fenris' abdomen.

"Please..." Fenris moaned, gasping when Dorian's lips wrapped around his throbbing shaft and began sucking in earnest.

Dorian licked the head lazily, his lips as soft as a feather as he dragged them up and down the shaft, pressing his tongue to the length of him and denying the warrior the pressure of his lips. Fenris' eyelids fluttered at the sensation, groaning deep in his throat. At the sound, the mage began sucking at the tip, his tongue tracing the head and slit before sliding his mouth down the shaft, taking his entire length inside his mouth.

Fenris' hips bucked, his hands grasping at the bedsheets to anchor himself as Dorian rose up his shaft only to plunge the elf's length down his throat once more.

"Dorian...I cannot... venhedis... please mage...I need..."

Dorian didn't answer, humming his approval and increasing the speed and pressure of his sucking. The vibration deep in his throat sent the warrior over the edge as he thrust into the mage's hot, wet mouth. Stars burst behind his eyes as he rode out his release, his seed shooting out of him while Dorian swallowed it all. The mage kept his mouth on him, licking every drop away. He let him go with a wet pop and leaned over him, a smile on his lips.

"I told you I liked to savour things." He whispered huskily.

Fenris reached for him, dragging the mage down into a bruising. Dorian moaned as the elf's tongue explored him, their kiss deepening, Dorian's arousal pressed to Fenris' abdomen. "I want you inside me Fenris." He growled against the his lips.

Fenris released him, his eyes filling with wonder. "You want me inside you?"

"Maker yes." Dorian groaned, rolling off the elf to lay on his side and drawing Fenris to lie atop of him. "I need you inside me Fenris. Please?"

"I... I have never done that before."

Dorian smiled, the heat in his eyes softening. "Then I am happy to be your first. Is that all right? Do you want to?"

Fenris kissed him again, a smile on his lips. "I do want to, but I will need your help."

Dorian groaned at the promise he saw in the warrior's eyes as Fenris grew hard between them. "Hold a minute, I have a spell that will help. Allow me?"

Fenris nodded as Dorian reached between them, his hand going to his entrance and muttered a few words. His fingers came back covered in something slick which he smoothed over Fenris' length, drawing a moan of pleasure from the elf.

"You know how to prepare me?" Dorian asked, continuing to stroke his hand along the elf's length.

Fenris nodded. "Yes, but you have to stop doing that first."

"Sorry." Dorian whispered as Fenris kissed him again. "Getting carried away."

Fenris chuckled, rising up to settle between the mage's legs. He took his finger and began to tease the mage, circling his entrance with a slicked finger. Without warning he slipped it inside Dorian's heat making the mage gasp and arch into his touch. He added a second finger, curling them to seek the sensitive spot within. Dorian writhed beneath him with a breathy moan, his hips bucking upward seeking friction.

"Please Fenris... I need you inside me." He gasped.

Fenris lifted Dorian's thighs and placed the tip of his length at Dorian's entrance. He eased forward, pressing his hard length against the tight muscle.

Dorian hissed, rolling his hips to make the elf move. "Fenris... sweet Maker stop teasing me..."

Fenris' breath hitched and he surged forward, the tip of his length breaching Dorian, the tightness drawing a hiss of surprised pleasure from them both. He eased in further, gasping at the heat and friction and the wonderful feeling of being buried inside Dorian's body. Another thrust and he was seated inside him, the sensation making them both gasp with pleasure.

"Fenris move... please... I need... more..."

The want in Dorian's voice broke through his fog and he began to move slowly, drawing out of that hot, tight heat before sliding back in again. Impatient, Dorian began rocking his hips, matching the elf's thrusts until they were rocking together. "Sweet Maker... you feel so good, so.... Maker bless me..." Dorian cried, his cock hard between them.

Fenris paused in his movements to take hold of Dorian's length, making the mage arch into his hand. "Come inside me Fenris... please, I won't last... you feel... oh gods..."

Fenris grunted, his mind lost to the moment, the feel of Dorian's heat clenching his length as the mage whined with abandon, his seed spewing ropy trails over his bared torso as his body tensed with the power fo his release. Fenris thrust once, twice more as Dorian clenched around him and then he was coming, his orgasm shooting white light behind his eyelids as his body twitched, his muscles contracting as he filled Dorian with his seed.

Dripping sweat, arms like jelly, he fell forward, landing in a gasping heap at Dorian's side. Several moments passed, the only sound that of their breathing as they came back to themselves by inches. Dorian recovered first, leaning up on his elbow and pressing a soft kiss to his lips. "That was amazing. You were amazing." He whispered, his voice breathy.

"I had no idea it was like that." Fenris replied, his voice ragged. "It felt incredible to be inside you." He said, returning the kiss.

"So even with that friend of Isabella's, you never...?"

"It didn't occur to me to ask." Fenris admitted. "And it was never mentioned as something he wanted."

"But did you ever consider it?"

"I was curious. I knew what it felt like for me, but I had no thought as to what it felt like to be inside someone else."

"But you slept with Isabella didn't you?"

Fenris chuckled. "I did, but after what I just experienced with you, there is no comparison."

"Really?" Dorian frowned. "I always imagined it to be similar."

"But a woman's entrance is softer and more pliable. There is not a lot of friction once she is aroused, though there is more wetness there."

"Was it enjoyable at least? I only ask because I have never been with a woman and never plan to, but I would hope you found it pleasant enough."

"It was nice at first, but a woman's charms and features were never enough to hold my interest for very long. It's why Isabella suggested having a man join us."

"Mmm. So does that mean you would be interested in doing it again?"

"I am very much interested Dorian, especially with you."

"Good. I was hesitant to ask. There are some who don't like it at all."

"Well I've just learned I'm not one of them, but I would like you inside me next time."

Dorian arched a brow at him. "Are you sure? I'm not saying no, for I'd like that as well but..."

"I know what you're saying, but I miss it Dorian. I may have learned these things against my wishes, but I miss having a man inside me."

"Mmm. You keep talking like that and your turn will come sooner than you think."

"I certainly hope so." Fenris growled, the look in his eyes making Dorian's cock twitch.

"Fasta vaas elf, stop teasing me. I'm exhausted. I don't think I have use of my arms yet, never mind having the energy to support myself."

"Soon though?" Fenris smiled, kissing him again.

"Soon enough I expect. You're entirely too enticing to resist."

Fenris sighed, snuggling into Dorian's side as he rested his head on Dorian's chest. "I have a... question."

"Mmm?"

"You said earlier you healed some of your bruises. I thought you didn't have healing magic?"

"I have a little, but I've asked Vivienne to teach me more."

"Why? I didn't think it interested you."

"It didn't until after the incident with the wyvern and that damned spindleweed."

Fenris chuckled. "I meant to ask you how that happened."

"An accident which at the time felt like my fault. Though I blame Bull for the spindleweed. I tripped and in his haste to help me, we fell together into the plant."

"That must have been quite the sight." Fenris murmured.

"Oh I'm sure it was. They were all laughing hysterically. I didn't find it funny since by that time, my eyes had swollen shut and I couldn't see a Maker damned thing."

Fenris suppressed laugh. "I'm glad you were all right though."

"Mmm." Dorian murmured, the unexpected comment tightening things in his chest.

"Dorian."

"Yes?"

"Have you... ever been in love?"

"I... I'm not sure. There was one man a long time ago who I had very strong feelings for. I thought about him all the time, he haunted my dreams and my days. He was ruggedly handsome and we shared a few stolen kisses."

"What happened?"

"Nothing happened."

"You never told him how you felt?"

"By the Fade, no of course not. Why would I? Nothing could ever have come of it. Besides, a year after I began my apprenticeship with Alexius he was married."

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked."

"It's nothing Fenris. Truly."

"It's not nothing, but I don't want to argue. I only ask because I'm curious how a person knows when it's happened."

"Well I suppose you think about them a lot. Maybe spend a lot of time with them and want to see them happy more often than not."

"But how do you know you want just them and not something you just haven't experienced before?"

"You do like your hard questions don't you?" Dorian murmured absently. "Well, I suppose if you thought about having the same experiences with someone else it might give you an idea of the differences between the two."

"Mmm." Fenris sighed. "So you're saying it's difficult and is different for everyone."

"Yes, though I suppose some people just know these things."

"Like Sera and the Inquisitor?"

"Why? What have you heard?" Dorian asked sharply.

Fenris raised his head to stare at the mage, a frown creasing his brow. "Nothing. They just seem to get along well together."

"Ah." Dorian nodded. "If only that were a prerequisite to falling in love. No, I think the Inquisitor has set her sights on an even more unlikely target."

"Oh? Who?"

"Commander Cullen."

Now it was Fenris' turn to look sharply at the mage. "You're serious? But they argue all the time. They never agree on anything."

"Yes, but you've seen how he looks at her when her back is turned, and how she always has a smile for him when he enters a room."

"I thought she was just being polite."

Dorian chuckled. "Next time look a little more closely. You'll see the occasional blush too, or a light brushing of hands."

"I'd much rather watch you."

"Well I am a sight to admire certainly, but I thought you wanted to know about love? Still, I think there's something unfolding between Cullen and the Inquisitor. It would help you if you truly wish to know."

"I do, but I'd still rather watch you." Fenris whispered, claiming Dorian's lips in another kiss.

"Mmm."

"Are you ready yet?" Fenris growled as he kissed his way along Dorian's jaw and up his neck.

"Ready for?"

"I want you inside me Dorian and I don't want to wait."

Dorian hissed a breath between clenched teeth as Fenris hit a very sensitive spot, the sensation going straight to his groin.

"Yes." He sighed. "Yes I'm ready. More than ready if you keep going like that."

"Good." Fenris smiled, kissing him again.

Dorian rolled them over, their lips still pressed together as he brought a knee up, forcing the elf's legs apart. Fenris groaned beneath the mage's lips, his hips rocking upward to graze his hard length against him.

"Dorian, please. I want you inside me."

With a growl Dorian reached between them, his hand going to Fenris' entrance. A moment later, Fenris felt warm slick drip from him and he moaned against the mage's press of lips to his. Releasing him, Dorian positioned himself and with one smooth thrust was seated inside the elf's tight heat a moment later. The movement drew a gasp from them both, each overcome with unexpected pleasure. Fenris rolled his hips and Dorian took hold of him, spreading the elf further as he began to thrust inside him. Dorian couldn't remember a time when this had felt so good. Watching Fenris come undone with every thrust made him harder, his need driving him to bury his length deeper with every roll of the elf's hips. "Dorian... I won't last... please..."

The need in the elf's voice drove him to increase his pace as he wrapped a slick hand around the elf's length, thrusting in time with his strokes. Fenris bucked beneath him, his hands clutching the sheets as he rode out the pleasure Dorian drew from his body.

"Dorian!" He cried as he came, the mage continuing to ride the elf and drawing every ounce of pleasure from him. He cried out again when he felt Dorian's seed filling him, the mage crying his name, his hair mussed and his skin covered in a sheen of sweat.

Panting, Dorian collapsed forward crushing the elf to him as he pressed their lips together, heedless of Fenris' seed between them . "Mmm." Dorian sighed. "Delicious."

"Dorian... that was, extraordinary... I didn't know it could feel like that. So full, so complete... but it was you filling me... I could feel how much you wanted me to enjoy it."

Dorian sighed, rolling off him to the side, a pleasant smile on his lips. "Being inside you was like tasting the divine Fenris. You... are divine." He said, snuggling into Fenris' side. "I feel so good. You're like a drug, a delicious, sweet, sensual drug and I can't get enough of you."

Fenris kissed the top of his head. "Funny, I was thinking the same thing of you."

"Mmm." Dorian murmured sleepily.

"Dorian?" Fenris whispered, but the mage was already fast asleep.

Fenris lay there, Dorian draped over his chest, his breathing even as he felt his soft breath sigh against his heart. Fenris ran his fingers through Dorian's hair , feeling more alive and more content than he'd ever been in his life. He sighed, eyes drifting closed, hoping whatever this was between them was the start of something which would never end.


	22. Fear is Unforgiving

Dorian woke, his thoughts light, a smile on his lips as he stretched languidly. A soft sigh broke the morning silence and his eyes snapped open and for a long moment he couldn't remember where he was. Then he felt a hand on his stomach and he glanced sideways to see Fenris snuggled against him. His heart pounded, old fears rising within his chest. His breath caught and a sharp pain made him wince as he admired the elf's face relaxed in sleep. His feelings for the warrior had grown without his noticing and for a moment he felt paralyzed with fear. He couldn't bear the thought that this was the end of their brief affair. The pain of such a loss would be unbearable.

Tears welled in his eyes making him clench his teeth in denial of his distress. The last thing he needed was for Fenris to see him upset. Again. It was not what anyone had ever wanted to see in him and every time he'd thought otherwise he'd been mocked for his weakness. He must have made some sound he couldn't suppress for Fenris opened his eyes, concern filling his eyes.

"Dorian? What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Just admiring the beautiful view." He lied.

Fenris frowned, his eyes searching Dorian's face. "I appreciate the thought Dorian, but something has upset you."

"I don't want to ruin the moment." Dorian sniffed, stiffening under the elf's touch.

Fenris' heart pounded, he didn't like the look he saw on Dorian's face and his concern was quickly changing to alarm.

"Maybe not, but you're scaring me mage. Talk to me." A tear rolled down the mage's cheek drawing a hiss of surprise from the elf. He raised up on his elbow and kissed him, swiping a thumb over Dorian's cheek to wipe it away. "Dorian? Please, if it's something I've done..."

"Kaffas." The mage swore, drawing a shuddering breath. "I didn't want you to see that."

Fenris drew him up until they were sitting and crushed the mage to his chest. "Well I did. Now tell me what brought this on."

"In Tevinter, something like this is just for pleasure, a bit of fun. Hoping for anything more would be foolish. Possibly dangerous."

"Dangerous? What are you talking about Dorian?"

Hating himself for needing to explain, for needing Fenris to understand, he forged on, holding nothing back. If this was it, he didn't want any misunderstandings. "We leave it here, I walk away. I won't be pleased, but later... dangerous. Walking away won't be easy. I'd rather do it now."

"Venhedis Dorian. Is this what you are accustomed to after sleeping with someone? Is this how you've been treated in the past?" Fenris had been hurt and used many times as a slave, but he'd always known it as a reality of his existence. No one had ever deliberately misled him only to betray him later. "They betrayed your trust."

"I wouldn't call it betrayal exactly..." Dorian murmured.

"They made you believe they cared about you and then mocked you when you asked for more. That's betrayal Dorian, there's no other way to say it."

Dorian shuddered in Fenris' arms and the elf responded by holding him tighter. He knew Dorian would be embarrassed by his outburst later but he didn't care. Dorian needed him, needed the comfort he offered and it hurt his heart to know Dorian had been used in such a way.

"Dorian, I do not want to end this. Maker." He sighed, loosening his hold on the mage to meet his tear-stained eyes. "I don't know what this is between us, but I know I don't want you to go. I don't want this to end."

Dorian merely stared, the pain in his eyes lessening.

"Are you speechless?" He teased. "I never thought to see that from you."

"It's not something I'm used to." Dorian admitted, expelling a shaky breath. "Maker, I've made a mess of this."

Fenris frowned and before Dorian could say another word, had captured his lips in a tender kiss. "You've done nothing wrong mage. I... I have never told anyone about my dreams before, I need you to hear that Dorian."

Dorian blinked, a curious look in his eyes. "Not even Hawke?"

Fenris shook his head. "No, I did not want to burden her with my troubles. I did not wish to burden you either but... I trust you Dorian."

"That's not what I expected you to say."

Fenris smiled, wiping the mage's tears away. "I know what you expected and I will never say anything I don't mean, nor will I ever betray you. You have my word mage."

"You're going to make me cry again elf." Dorian admonished. "But thank you for telling me."

"Do you trust me Dorian?"

Dorian smiled. "I do trust you Fenris. I may sometimes let my fears get the better of me, but I trust you."

"Then you're in good company. I am the same."

"Maker, are we both crazy to think this will work?"

"Maybe. But I can't imagine not trying Dorian. The thought of not having you at my side... I don't want to consider it."

"Then we are of one mind. I cannot imagine being without you either."

"Does that mean you're ready to get out of bed? Get some breakfast?"

Dorian blushed. "I apologize, but I would prefer a bath first. I must look a sight after our activities last night."

Fenris laughed. "You are a sight Dorian, but it's one I would never want to be without. As for a bath, I know a way to reach the baths unseen. Or would you prefer I arrange for one to be brought here?"

Dorian gulped. "You would do that?"

Fenris smiled and kissed him again. "Anything for my breathtaking mage."

"Then I would like to do it here. If it's all right with you."

"It's fine Dorian." He said, slipping from the bed to dress. "I'll arrange for a bath and bring something for us to eat while we wait."

"Thank you Fenris." Dorian said softly. "I'll tidy up a bit while you're gone."

"Back soon."

\----xxx----

By the time Fenris returned, Dorian had dressed, stripped and changed the bed, and did his best to put his appearance in some kind of order.

Fenris smiled at him when he returned with a tray laden with hot tea, cinnamon pastries and a selection of sliced meats and cheeses. They ate in silence, letting the food calm and ground them in the present. Dorian was refilling his tea when two servants arrived with a bath.

"Do you need water messere?" One of them asked.

"That won't be necessary." Dorian replied. "I'll take care of it. Thank you."

"You're welcome messere."

They left and Dorian raised a questioning eyebrow to Fenris. "You don't mind if I use my magic for this? I should have asked before sending them away."

Fenris frowned. "It's fine Dorian. I meant what I said, it doesn't trouble me like it used to. Besides, having you use magic to fill and heat the bath is more convenient."

"Alright."

Dorian cast an ice spell, filling the bath almost full and then sent fire into it, to melt and heat it. In moments steam rose from the surface, Dorian's eyes alight with pleasure at the sight of it.

Fenris crossed to him and began helping him out of his clothes.

"What are you doing?" Dorian asked, puzzled.

"Undressing you of course. I want to see the look on your face when you get in."

"Oh." Was all he said as the last of his clothes dropped to the floor.

"You're beautiful Dorian." Fenris breathed as he helped Dorian into the tub, relishing the look of bliss on the mage's face as he sunk into the steaming water.

Dorian sighed like a contented cat and blinked up at him. "Well? Aren't you going to join me?"

Fenris' eyes went wide. "I didn't expect you'd want to share."

"I'm not that selfish. Unless it's selfish to want to see you in all your delectable nakedness. A feast for my eyes... and other things. Then yes, I suppose I am very selfish."

Fenris smiled, stripping out of his clothes and stepping into the steaming water.

Moments later, they were seated across from each other, the basin big enough to accommodate them both. Dorian's eyes opened in surprise when Fenris touched his chest.

"What are you doing?"

Fenris smiled at him cheekily. "This is a bath is it not? I'm going to wash you of course." He said, sliding soapy hands over his warmed skin.

"Mmm. That feels good, but I intend to do the same for you."

"I certainly hope so." Fenris growled, lifting Dorian's thigh to wash his legs. "Turn around mage, I'll do your back."

Dorian groaned, the feel of the warrior's hands caressing his skin combined with the heat of the water was making him weak with pleasure. But he did as asked, starting only once when Fenris began running his hands through his hair to wash it. Finished, Dorian turned, a lazy smile on his face as he turned his attention to washing the elf. By the time he finished with Fenris' hair, they were both aware of each other's arousal.

Fenris moaned, leaning back into Dorian's chest. "Take me Dorian." He sighed.

"Now? Like this? Here?" He asked, surprised.

"Can you think of a better way to remain clean?"

"Good point."

Together they positioned themselves just so. Combined with the heat of the water and their relaxed state, Dorian slid inside Fenris' body in one smooth thrust, drawing a sigh of pleasure from them both. They rocked their hips together, their movements slow, enjoying the feel of their joined bodies as they brought each other to release. Fenris slumped back onto Dorian's chest, his breathing laboured, a sigh of pleasure issuing from his lips.

"That was the most sensual thing I've ever experienced." Dorian whispered, placing a kiss to the elf's neck. "You continue to surprise me."

"You've never bathed with another before or had someone wash you?"

"Perhaps as a young child when I still had a nanny, though I don't remember it."

"I'm glad to have given you a new experience then."

"Mmm yes, well done. A shame we have to get out, the water is starting to cool."

"Indeed." Fenris chuckled, rousing himself and rising from the water. "Come mage, I'll walk you to your room for a change of clothes. Unless you want to wear the same as yesterday?"

Dorian busied himself with drying his skin. "Scandalous! No, I need to change. I believe the Inquisitor has a new assignment for me. I'd like to dress the part before I speak to her."

"If she has something for you, I'm coming with you. I will not be left behind again."

"Yes, I wanted to ask you about that." Dorian said as they made the short walk to his quarters.

"It was nothing. I spoke to Hawke about it and she apologized"

"Well good. I thought it was strange when I confronted the Inquisitor about it." Dorian said absently as he changed into one of his more favoured armour sets.

"You... confronted the Inquisitor?"

Dorian frowned. "Yes. Why? Should I not have?"

"No it's not that. I just... wasn't aware anyone had noticed my absence."

"Well I noticed and I was not happy about it. There was no good reason for leaving you behind."

Fenris crossed the room to him as Dorian finished dressing. He took hold of Dorian and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips. "Thank you Dorian, that means a lot to me."

"Well you're welcome, but it should not have happened. Both Hawke and the Inquisitor were wrong and should never have made such a decision without first discussing it with you."

Fenris merely smiled again, his chest swelling with Dorian's words and led them from the room. "Come on, let's see what she has for us to do."


	23. Fenris is a Fool

"I'm sorry Dorian, Fenris, but I need you both in different locations. This is too important to not split you up. I need Dorian's expertise on the Venatori and I need Fenris' knowledge on slavers. And before either of you object more, where Dorian's needed there is a lot of red lyrium. I'm sorry, but this is how it has to be." The Inquisitor finished, fixing them both with a look which practically dared them to argue further.

Wordlessly, Dorian turned and left the War Room, tugging Fenris with him since it was clear the elf had no intention of leaving on his own.

Once they'd passed through the great hall and down to the courtyard, Fenris exploded. "How can you just accept this? I don't want you going to fight red Templars without me, it's too dangerous! Are you listening? Stop walking mage!" Fenris cried, grabbing hold of Dorian's arm and spinning him to face him.

"Yes Fenris, I heard you." He said quietly, his voice so dejected, Fenris relaxed his grip on his arm. "We don't have a choice. And I saw what happened when that Red Templar cornered you in the Hissing Wastes. It's even more dangerous for you, the Inquisitor knows that and I won't risk it."

"The Inquisitor can't stop me from coming."

Dorian frowned. "Have you so little concern for your own safety?"

"I can take care of myself." Fenris growled. "And I don't see why you're following her orders. You could say no."

"I did say no Fenris! You heard me say it, but she's in charge here. I do what I'm asked and she needs my help against the Venatori."

Fenris scowled harder. "This is ridiculous! I don't see why you're agreeing to this."

The hurt in Dorian's eyes was unmistakable. "No, I don't suppose you do. Excuse me, but I have to pack for my trip."

Fenris felt his heart still. What had he done wrong? "Dorian, wait..."

But Dorian only walked faster, pretending he hadn't heard as he continued on to his quarters.

"Kaffas!" The elf swore loud enough to scare the recruits near the barracks. He scowled at them hard enough they flinched, pretending he was no longer there. Why was the mage doing this? Red Templars were dangerous, especially for a mage. It was no less dangerous for him, so what was the issue? They could fight together, keep each other safe!

He kicked a pebble near his foot, hard enough it sailed through the second floor window of the Herald's Rest and ending in a startled curse.

"Ow!" And then a blond female elf stuck her head out and cursed at him. "Bloody, broody, tattooed maniac! What in Andraste's tits you think you're doing yeah? You wanna throw rocks at people at least have the common sense to throw them at nobles! Oi! Knife-ear! I'm talkin to you!"

"I heard you elf!" He sneered back, walking away.

"Hey! Don't you walk away from me! I'm not finished!"

"I don't care!" He shouted back.

She disappeared from the window and Fenris debated for less than a second whether or not to flee. He swore under his breath. From what he knew of her, she was like a hissing, spitting cat. He would not run from her. So he waited, arms crossed as she came bursting out the door of the tavern, fists clenched, eyes stormy as she marched up to him.

"You're that glowy bit what's in that book of Varric's yeah? Heard you were like an animal all snarky and spiky and rude." She sneered, crossing her arms over her chest. "Didn't think you'd lower yourself to throwing rocks. What's wrong with you anyway? Someone look at you wrong?"

"No."

"Oh! Talky one aren't ya? Hey, wait a minute. Weren't you just talking to Dorian? Shite! You're the one he's seein ain't ya? You have a fight or something? That why you threw a rock at me?"

"I did not throw a rock at you." He huffed.

"Doesn't matter. It hit me. Now tell me why." She said pointing a finger at his chest, her face growing more red by the minute. "I'm not leaving until you do."

"It was an accident. I apologize. I didn't mean to hit anyone." Fenris sighed.

"Not. Accepted. Don't care if it were an accident or not. Why'd you throw it?"

"I didn't throw it. I kicked it."

"And?" She pressed, scowling harder.

"Because I was angry."

"I know what that's like." She nodded, her entire posture relaxing. "People get you so upset you just have to hit things. Me, I like arrows. More arrows the better, especially against uppity, look down your nose nobles."

"You... talk a lot." Fenris observed, confused by her behaviour.

"And you don't talk enough. Well? Who ticked you off?"

"It's none of your business."

"I'm makin it my business. Sides, you don't tell me I'll just go ask Inky, I bet she knows."

"Ugh! You are irritating."

"Tell me who." She said, ignoring him.

"Fine. I'm angry with Dorian and the Inquisitor. Happy now?"

"No. What'd they do?"

"None of your business. Leave me alone elf." He said, turning on his heel and marching away.

"The name's Sera, spikey!" She shouted, racing off and up the stairs of the keep.

Fenris' first thought was to go after Dorian and apologize, but he was still angry and he didn't know what he'd done to upset him. He didn't want to argue again and he had never been one to apologize to someone without first knowing what he was apologizing for. So he reversed course and headed for the Herald's Rest and a large tankard of ale.

\----xxx----

Dorian knew he shouldn't have walked away from Fenris, but in that moment he didn't see the man he was falling for, instead he saw all the reasons he'd left home. The slavery, the blood magic, the lies, the pettiness, but most of all, he saw how all along he'd never had choices. How could he even say those words to Fenris? A man who had never known the freedom of choices until he'd fought and bled for them?

He'd think Dorian was nothing but a selfish, entitled... noble. He'd laugh at him and in his comparison of choices he'd see him for the failure his countrymen saw him as, the failure he was. All he, Dorian Pavus had ever done was run away, embarrass his family and assist someone more powerful in stopping Alexius. How could any of that compare to what Fenris had lived through? The truth was he had no power of his own, he'd given up what little power he had when he'd sold his Birthright. All he had now was the Inquisition and if he didn't have that he had nothing and nowhere to go.

With a frustrated sob of helplessness, he packed what he needed for his trip with the Inquisitor, a tear falling down his cheek as he remembered how safe he'd felt only hours ago. He sniffed, feeling the familiar crushing weight of loneliness squeezing his heart, and with a sigh told himself it was better this way. Better for Fenris to never know how powerless and useless he really was. Better he think him beholden and ruled by the Inquisitor than realize he was powerless to change anything in Tevinter. He hesitated at the threshold of his doorway, his heart screaming at him not to leave things like this with the elf, but he ignored it. What could he say? He had to go and the words he wouldn't say to Fenris were best left unsaid anyway.


	24. Broody and Buttercup

Fenris was pleasantly drunk. Not happily drunk, but pleasantly drunk and quite numb. He was sitting alone at the bar, his tense and broody posture keeping most of the other patrons away. Cabot said little and Fenris said less and he liked it that way and then someone took the seat beside him.

He could feel their eyes on him and was tempted to sneer and scare them off, but realized he was too drunk to care.

"Oi! Elf!" Shrieked a female voice in his ear making him cringe. " You deaf? Or just too drunk to hear me?"

He turned his head to see the blonde elf from earlier, Sera was it? Staring at him, a smile tugging at the corner of her mouth.

"That's what I thought." She smiled, raising a mug of ale in his direction in what he took to be a toast. "Too drunk. Best way to be when you're angsting over someone."

He scowled at her. "I am not angsting."

"Pfft!" She snorted. "Riiight... that's why yer eyes are all red and you can't see or hear anything proper. Cuz you always sit here, night after night, getting drunk for no reason. See I know that last part ain't true, cuz I live here and you don't come here much."

"And you still talk too much." He retorted, sneering at her.

"Yeah? Well I talked to Inky and now I know why you're in here."

"So?"

"So magey-pants is a friend of mine yeah? So you better not of hurt him or I'll stick you with arrows."

Fenris frowned and set aside his ale. He considered he may have actually overdone his drinking when the room swayed. He blinked and turned back to Sera who was still watching him.

"You don't look so good." She observed. "Hey Cabot! Got a fainter here! Get him a coffee yeah?"

"What are you doing?" Fenris growled.

"Getting you something that's not boozy. You're gonna pass out and I'm not carrying you back to your room."

"I will not pass out." He grumbled. "And if I did, I'm perfectly fine here."

"No you're not. Inky said to make sure you were all right if I found you in here and that's what I'm gonna do."

"Why do you care? Why does she care?"

Sera shrugged. "Dunno. Maybe you should ask her and I don't care, but Dorian does and he's my friend, so... drink the coffee when it gets here yeah?"

"Fine." He growled. When the coffee came, he wrinkled his nose at the bitter taste but drank it down and Sera ordered him another one. By the time he'd finished the second cup, the room had stopped spinning and his thoughts were no longer clouded. Sera still sat beside him, presumably watching in case he should pass out.

"You may go now elf." He muttered, her stare irritating him.

"Sera." She corrected. "And I'm not leaving. You upset Dorian and I wanna know what you said."

"I did not upset Dorian."

"Did too. Now talk. Inky said you couldn't go on a mission together and you were mad, so there's that, but why'd you yell at Dorian? Ain't his fault."

"He could've said no! He could leave with me."

"And go where? Thought you and Dorian were here to help the Inquisition?"

Fenris scowled as his own words caught up with him. "We... are." He said quietly.

"And he said he wouldn't leave so you yelled at him? That's stupid."

"I..." Fenris felt his cheeks warm. "Yes, it was stupid. I should go, I need apologize. Thank you for the coffee and I'm sorry I hit you with a rock."

"Eh." She said, waving her hand dismissively. "Didn't really hurt and anyway you can't apologize. Dorian's gone, left with Inky an hour ago."

"Dorian left?" Fenris felt his heart sink, worse, he felt guilty for how he'd behaved. "Venhedis."

"That's swearing what you're doing right? Sounds like swearing. Dorian does that too."

"I need to go."

"So long as it's to get ready. We gotta go soon. I heard we're looking for slavers, Coryphenus lackeys. Heard you're good at that, killing slavers. Be fun right? Lots of arrows." She giggled, winking at him.

"We're leaving... tonight?"

"Yeah." She drawled. "Inky insisted and it's important we stop em. Can't let Coryphyshit win."

"Yes it's important." He agreed, getting to his feet. "Where are we meeting the others?"

"Front gates, lower courtyard. Don't be late grumpy.


	25. It's Hopeless

"Dorian." He looked up to see the Inquisitor approaching him where he sat by the campfire staring at nothing.

"Inquisitor."

"You've been very quiet on this trip. Did something happen with Fenris?"

"It's nothing."

"You're a terrible liar Dorian Pavus. Talk to me."

"The truth is we're just not good for each other. Was bound to end eventually. Impossible situation."

"Dorian."

He smiled and got to his feet. "I'm fine Inquisitor. Goodnight. I'll try to be more upbeat tomorrow."

The Inquisitor watched him go and felt a wave of guilt and concern wash over her. This was her fault. Whatever was going on had happened before they'd left Skyhold and if Dorian wouldn't talk, she'd find someone who would.

Crossing to the Requisition table she hastily wrote a quick note, attached it to the leg of a raven and sent it flying. With luck, she should have answers by the morning.

\----xxx----

Though he was still consumed with guilt and recriminations, killing slavers and other misguided cultists was having a cathartic effect on his mood. He'd calmed somewhat since leaving Skyhold, the panic he'd felt replaced with a faint worry but he no longer wanted to chase down the Inquisitor's party and beg forgiveness from the mage. He hated that they'd parted in anger and hated it more that it had been his doing.

"Hey! Grumpy!" Sera shouted. " You wanna wake up and do some more killing or what? Getting overwhelmed here!"

He snarled, activating his markings and rejoined the battle, hacking and slashing through their enemies until the clearing lay quiet.

"Damn spikey." Sera smiled. "Good to know you weren't sleeping over there."

"My name is Fenris." He scowled, wiping his sword on a clean spot on the body he stood over.

"Ew. Gross!" Sera wrinkled her nose in disgust. "Did you just wipe your sword on a dead body?"

"It was closest. I'll clean it properly at camp."

"It's still gross."

"A sword must be kept clean Sera." Solas murmured, joining them. "It can destroy the blade otherwise."

"Pfft. Doesn't change anything. Still gross." She said again, turning to catch up with Cassandra.

"So." Fenris said, watching the elven apostate. "You're Solas."

"And you're Fenris."

Fenris grunted. He'd seen the mage in passing at Skyhold but had felt no need to speak to the man. He couldn't understand why Solas had joined the Inquisition or why Cassandra hadn't tossed him out for being an apostate. Nothing about Solas made sense and he didn't like how the mage watched him sometimes.

"Your markings seem to be serving you well." Solas said as they turned to follow the others back to camp.

"Well enough."

"The pattern is one I've not seen in many years, though only in memories of the Fade."

"And?"

"And nothing. It is merely an observation. Your master seems to have had access to a great many elven treasures and used what he found to create the perfect weapon."

Fenris bristled. "I no longer have a master and I'll thank you not to mention him again."

"Of course. I'd heard you'd slain him. In Kirkwall? My apologies, I did not mean to offend you."

"You would have to do worse than that to offend me mage." Fenris retorted.

"I had no intention of doing that Fenris."

"Good. See that you don't." He said, moving away from the elf to catch up with Sera and Cassandra.

Back at camp, Sera was busying herself with annoying the Inquisition soldiers with endless questions. Solas retreated to his tent saying something about needing to renew his connection to the Fade while Cassandra spoke with the scout, filing her report on their latest battle. Fenris laid his sword aside by the fire and went to collect water, oil and a cloth to clean his blade. He had just finished wiping the last traces of blood from the weapon when Cassandra joined him.

"May I?" She asked, nodding her head at the bucket of water.

Wordlessly, he passed it to her and resumed applying the oil to his blade to keep it protected from the elements.

"Fenris." Cassandra said, drawing his eyes to her. "We have not had much time to speak since you joined us. How are you finding it? It must be different from your time in Kirkwall."

"It is." He nodded. "You are the Seeker who took Varric to Haven are you not?"

"I am. I did not expect him to stay with us after that. He has... surprised me."

"He does that sometimes."

"True. Tell me, what was it like working with Hawke?"

He frowned. "An odd question. I thought you had already interrogated Varric about that."

She blushed. "I did. And what I learned was not what I had expected. I believed her guilty of many things but it seemed I was wrong. Did she truly fight the Arishok alone?"

"She did."

"She must have been quite the woman to gain loyalty from such a diverse group of companions."

"Much like your Inquisitor has done with the Inquisition."

"True enough." She sighed. "To tell the truth, I'm not very good at this."

"I don't understand."

"Small talk. It is a dreadful social grace for which I have no patience."

"Then we have something in common." Fenris mused.

"It would seem so. But I need to ask you something. It's why I started this conversation."

"Then ask Seeker."

"Very well. Leliana says that she gave you a note regarding something to do with Lord Pavus, Dorian if you prefer. She wanted me to ask if you learned anything more."

"Note?" He frowned, then he remembered. "Oh. Yes. I haven't had time to ask Dorian about it, but I think it has to do with his family Birthright."

"Birthright?"

"It's a sign of status and proof of family lineage, among other things, specifically with the noble families in Tevinter."

"I see. And if Leliana's information is correct, Dorian sold it before joining the Inquisition?"

"I think so, yes."

"I see. Well thank you Fenris. That was most helpful, I need to let the Inquisitor know."

"Wait!" Fenris flushed. "I mean, why did you need to know this?"

"Oh! Well I... that is..." Cassandra sighed. "The Inquisitor is concerned. Dorian's been withdrawn and won't tell her anything. She's asked Leliana for any insight she may have. Excuse me, but I need to let her know what you've said."

Fenris watched her go and felt another pang of guilt over how he and Dorian had parted. But the amulet... why was it nagging at him as though he were forgetting something important? He sighed and put away his cleaning supplies and sword and busied himself getting their evening meal started. It wasn't that he wanted to cook or even had much appetite, but he wanted to be busy and his current companions wouldn't be looking for food for several hours yet. He had no interest in waiting for them to think about food, much less listen to them bicker over who was going to prepare it when they did.

An hour later the food he'd prepared was ready and his traveling companions had joined him by the fire. He found the choice of companions for this venture odd. None of them seemed to get along, there was little, if any banter as they scouted trails for signs of their targets.

Sera couldn't stand Solas, barely refraining from sticking him with arrows, instead mocking everything he said. Cassandra wasn't all that fond of Sera herself and though she seemed to respect the apostate, she rarely spoke to him. As for himself, he didn't care much for Sera, but he shared her opinion of the apostate. He respected Cassandra, but she reminded him of Aveline with her instense scrutinizing gazes, though she was much more dangerous as a Seeker of Truth.

"So spikey. You decide to stop brooding yet?" Sera piped up, breaking the silence as she joined him.

"I do not brood."

"S'pose not. Solas does it better anyway. You're more like stony silence, though I guess that's not much of a nickname huh?"

"I do not brood either Sera." Solas interjected. "There are those who enjoy companionable silences and quiet reflection."

"In other words, you're boring." Sera sneered, rolling her eyes. "Why I got stuck with the three of you I've no idea. Rather be with magey-pants and bulls-eye. Least they know how to have fun."

"I'm curious Sera. What do they do that makes being out here fun?" Cassandra asked, setting aside her dinner bowl.

"Ugh. If I have to explain it, you won't get it. You're all too serious to have fun."

"I would still like to know."

"Fine! Dorian tells jokes and plays word games. Sometimes he cheats and uses stupid words that don't mean anything, and he laughs. Bull loves mayhem like I do, but he uses that big sword of his to break things and has the craziest ideas about attacking the baddies."

"And these things are fun?" Fenris asked, frowning at the elf.

"Course they're fun grumpy... unlike you, always scowling at everything."

"I do not scowl at everything."

"Fine you don't scowl. But you don't smile either, specially when magey-pants isn't around. Ugh. I'm tired of this talk, I'm going to bed. Hope we're going back to Skyhold soon, being out here is depressing."

The three of them watched her go and then Solas got to his feet, excusing himself as he headed to his tent. Cassandra locked eyes with Fenris and he shrugged.

"She's not wrong." Cassandra sighed. "I do not understand the Inquisitor's choices for this venture either. We are not the best suited for a strong team."

"I agree with that assessment." Fenris nodded. "Who would you have chosen if I might ask?"

"Well, we needed you for your experience. A mage would be useful, though I don't believe it was necessary here, so... perhaps Varric or Bull, myself and you."

"But not Vivienne or Solas?"

"There are few who get along with Lady Vivienne. The same can be said about Solas and Blackwall."

"I was wondering about that. What is Blackwall's story and why wasn't he affected like the other Wardens?"

"I'm not sure. It is strange that he was not affected by Corypheus' call. Perhaps he is just too new to joining the Wardens and couldn't hear it."

"I suppose it's a possibility. Do you intend to speak to the Inquisitor about our group?"

"It will be necessary. We cannot have our people unable to work as a unified group. It is too dangerous."

"Will we be leaving this area soon?"

"Tomorrow actually. Our scouts have reported no other slaver activity in the area. If they should return, we have enough soldiers here now to deal with them should that happen."

"Good, I'm looking forward to leaving this place."

"I will not be sad to leave either." Cassandra admitted, getting to her feet. "Goodnight Fenris."

"Goodnight Seeker."

He watched her go and the nagging feeling returned and he scowled into the fire. What was it about that amulet? Then it hit him and he smacked his forehead. Kaffas! Dorian's birthright, his status in Tevinter... without it he was nothing in the Imperium. He held no power after he'd sold it and it was why he'd joined the Inquisition, why he listened to the Inquisitor. Without the amulet or the Inquisition, Dorian had nothing and nowhere to go. Bloody Maker, he was a fool.


	26. Drinking

After clearing out another camp of Red Templars, the Inquisitor was fed up. Their intel on the area was crap and she was regretting the entire venture. She called for the breakdown of camp for dawn the next day and went to look for Dorian. She found him by the stream, absently tossing rocks in the water. He started when she came to stand beside him, but said nothing.

"Dorian."

He sighed heavily. "Yes? Come to check on the moody Vint again Inquisitor? I assure you I am fine. Just coming to the unfortunate realization that after this is all over, assuming we prevail against Corypheus and don't all die horribly, I have nowhere to go."

"I thought you wanted to return to Tevinter? Become a voice of change and to improve things there."

"I'm not saying I don't want to Inquisitor, but due to an unfortunate decision on my part, it is not possible."

"Does it have something to do with an amulet?"

Dorian scowled. "How do you know about that? Never mind. Leliana, of course, she would find out."

"Actually it was Fenris. He said it was a birthright."

Dorian's face clouded and his voice was hard and angry when he spoke. "Whatever Fenris did or did not say about the matter is irrelevant. The amulet is gone and I'd rather not talk about it."

"I'm sorry Dorian. I just thought I might be able to help."

"I appreciate that, but there's nothing you can do."

The Inquisitor nodded. "Alright. I also wanted to let you know we're heading back to Skyhold tomorrow."

"Well that's good news." He said some of his usual good nature creeping back into his voice. "I'm looking forward to sleeping in a real bed again."

\----xxx----

Fenris paced the floor of his room. The Inquisitor's party was overdue and no one had heard from them. He was torn between going to look for them and finding the Orlesian merchant who held Dorian's birthright.

Venhedis! This was ridiculous. He needed to get the amulet back. Looking for the overdue party was pointless when so many others were already out looking. With a growl of frustration, he grabbed his travel bag and left the room. He spotted Cullen on his way out of the stronghold, stopping only long enough to provide his destination and then he was gone, riding a halla to Val Royeaux.

\----xxx----

He hadn't expected Fenris to greet him when he returned to Skyhold, but it still hurt more than he anticipated. After unpacking and choosing a clean change of clothes, he headed for the undercroft and the public baths.

Feeling refreshed after removing the travel grime and sweat, he dressed and headed to the tavern. He still hadn't seen Fenris and he was beginning to worry. Surely the elf wasn't still angry with him, was he? Sure he hadn't said goodbye and they'd argued... but he wouldn't have left without saying anything at all, would he? Heart thudding, he entered the Herald's Rest and scanned the room. But there was no sign of the warrior and a note of panic started to flood through him. No, no... he couldn't have. He felt as though he'd had all the wind taken from him, his breath faltering and for a moment everything went black and lifeless.

"Hey Vint!" Bull yelled from across the room, drawing the attention of everyone present. "You okay?"

He blinked and the room stopped spinning and he found that he could walk, so he did. His legs took him to the bar where he heard himself order a whiskey and then he was moving to join Bull in his corner. He took a seat and drank the whiskey like water, Bull gaping at him as though he'd grown two heads.

"Uh...Dorian? You wanna tell me what's going on with you?"

"Not particularly, no."

"Well if you're gonna drink like that, gimme a watchword for when you pass out. I'll make sure you make it back to your room in one piece."

"Watchword?"

"Yeah. You say it when you've had enough but can't."

"Wouldn't a watchword be pointless in such a scenario?"

"Nah. People can be shitfaced and know they need to stop, but they always remember a watchword."

"Fine. Kirkwall."

"Kirkwall?"

Dorian glared.

"Okay, okay. Kirkwall it is. Bottoms up Vint."

"Yes. Cheers." He said without humour.

An hour later he was having a hard time keeping his ass in the chair. He was convinced the qunari was moving it when he wasn't looking, but Bull only laughed and clinked his mug to his again.

"So Vint. Ready to talk yet?"

"Nothing to talk about qunari." Dorian slurred, frowning at the sound of his voice.

"Sure there is. No one drinks like that for no reason."

"Don't see how that's any of your business."

"Wouldn't have something to do with a prickly elf would it?"

"Certainly not." Dorian protested. "Why? You know where he is?"

Bull fixed him in place with his good eye. "Heard he took off three days ago. Told Cullen he was going to Val Royeaux."

"He... left?" Dorian couldn't hide the pain in his voice. "Val Royeaux? What's he doing in... hic...Val...hic... Royeaux?"

"Cullen didn't say."

"I...I.. hic...see." He blinked and watched the room swim alarmingly.

"Dorian?"

"Bull.... I...hic... Kirkwall."

"Okay big guy. Hang on, I'll get you to your room."

"No handsies though right?"

"Crap Dorian, you've had way more than I thought. Come on Vint, I'll get you tucked up in bed and send for a healer."

"Healer? Why? Are you injured?"

"Damn mage, you're gonna regret this tomorrow."

"Why? Am I injured?" Dorian asked as Bull pulled open the door to his room.

"In more ways than one Vint." Bull muttered, laying him down on the bed and tugging the mage's boots off.

"Huh. Sounds serious. Anything I can do to help?"

Bull frowned down at him. "Who are you going to help Dorian?"

"Why the poor fellow you said was injured. I can't remember his name though. Did you say his name?"

"No Dorian, I didn't." He said, tossing a blanket over him.

"Mmm. Guess it's not important then."

"I'll send a healer to come see you."

Dorian yawned. "Yes father, I'll be good. Not like you're going to give me a choice in the matter. Now go away, I'm tired."

Bull frowned as pulled the door closed and headed for the mage tower to find a healer. Dorian was going to need it.

\----xxx----

Fenris returned to Skyhold a few hours later. It was well past dark as he took the stairs up to the keep, so he was surprised when Bull stepped out of the shadows.

"Elf."

"Hissrad."

"Need to talk to you. It's important."

"It's late and I'm tired. Can we do this later?" He said, turning to the stairs.

"No it can't. It's about Dorian."

Fenris froze. "What about Dorian?"

"Come with me elf. We'll talk. Then you can go see him."

The more Iron Bull talked, the worse Fenris felt and it was killing him not to go to Dorian's side immediately.

"Look, I know you want to rush off, but it's not gonna help him now. The healer's there."

"Tell me again why he needed a healer."

"Drank too much. Like way more than I thought. Should be fine by morning though, no need to worry about that."

"And do you know why he was drinking?"

"Best guess? You and some amulet he lost. You know about that?"

"I do." Fenris nodded. "More than that is not your business. I'm leaving now."

"Elf. Be nice to him. Dorian's got a good heart, he doesn't deserve more pain."

"I have no intention of hurting him or of letting anyone else hurt him either. Goodnight."

Fenris fled the tavern and raced up to the keep and Dorian's room. The healer was gone and the mage was tucked in bed, a fire burning in the hearth. He let out a sigh of relief and dragged a chair to the bedside, taking in Dorian's disheveled appearance and felt a stab of pain in his chest. Dark purple smudges coloured the place under his eyes and a sheen of sweat was visible on his forehead. His hair was mussed and he looked more than just disheveled, he looked broken. Without any hesitation, Fenris took Dorian's hand in his and whispered his name.

The mage stirred, his eyes fluttering open but unfocused. "Fenris? No, you're not him, he left me just like everyone else. Begone demon, you'll find no willing participant in your childish games here."

"Dorian. It's me. I'm here."

"Why should I believe that? Don't be ridiculous. I was a fool to think a man like him would want anything to do with me."

"What are you talking about?" Fenris frowned.

"Ugh. I get tired of your games demon. I am not worth his time. He's a warrior, he won his freedom. Whereas I... I have done nothing."

"Dorian... that's not true. You've done many brave things. I'm sorry we argued. I should not have yelled at you. Please Dorian, it's me. I'm here and I'm real."

Dorian blinked, then frowned. "Fenris? You're here? I thought you were in Val Royeaux."

"I just got back."

"I thought... I..." Dorian looked away and refused to meet the elf's eyes.

"I know what you thought Dorian and I'm sorry."

Dorian blinked again, clearly trying to stop his tears from falling. "It's not your fault."

"Yes it is. I have something for you."

"Please don't." He said, his voice breaking. "You've already given me a gift and I've done nothing but cause you grief. Whatever you have for me, I don't deserve it."

"But it's already yours mage." He said, holding the amulet up to the light.

Dorian sucked in a breath, his eyes wide with shock. "Is that my birthright?"

"It is."

"You went to Val Royeaux for me then."

"I did." He nodded.

"I see. Thank you Fenris, I promise I'll find a way to pay you back. But I think you should go."

"What?"

"I'm sorry. Please, just go."

"I'll go, but this isn't over Dorian. We're talking about this tomorrow."

"No we aren't. I'm no good for you Fenris. This amulet proves that."

"No it doesn't mage." Fenris growled.

"I'm sorry."

Fenris got to his feet, his mind warring with his heart. But the look on Dorian's face and his own confusion had him storming from the room, his heart racing. He headed to his room, tore off his armour and fell into bed still dressed in his leathers.


	27. Apologies and Truths

Dorian woke to a pounding headache and his skin chilled from dried sweat. He couldn't remember much of anything until he swung his legs over the side of the bed and felt something hard digging into his palm.

Amulet. Fenris. Bull. Maker, what had he said? He cursed a string of Tevene that would make a brothel owner blush as he dressed. In that moment he didn't much care about appearances, he had no memory of what he'd said, but the feeling in his gut told him it hadn't been good.

It was still early so he headed to the kitchen and grabbed food enough for two, then hurried back to knock at the elf's door. A muffled groan answered and he stepped into the dim light of the room, a tray balanced in one hand.

Fenris was still half asleep, his face buried in a pillow, his bedsheet twisted around his body. He groaned at the sound of him moving about the room and after another minute, cracked an eye open and stared at him.

"Dorian?"

"Ah you're awake!" He said cheerfully, setting out plates while Fenris sat up.

"What are you doing?"

"I've brought you breakfast."

"I can see that." He said, getting to his feet and crossing to where Dorian stood. "I meant why are you here? After last night..."

"Yes, about that. I came to apologize. I believe I behaved like an ass and I've brought you breakfast as a peace offering."

"You believe? You don't remember?" Fenris frowned.

Dorian blushed crimson. "Not really. I'm sorry about that as well. I want to make it up to you if I can. I'll understand if that's not an option though."

"Just like that?"

Dorian's smile faltered. "No, but I don't know what I said. It might be unforgivable in which case this apology is grossly inadequate."

Fenris felt pain lance his heart and he took hold of the mage and kissed him, hard. Dorian whimpered against his lips and Fenris deepened the kiss, crushing the mage to him. He stepped back a moment later, his hands holding Dorian close to see tears in his eyes.

"I am worse than a bride's mother." Dorian whispered.

Fenris chuckled and hugged him again. "You're not Dorian. Thank you for breakfast. Shall we eat?"

"I... yes. Let's eat."

They are in silence a few minutes, Dorian shifting in his seat with nervous energy.

"Mage, if you have something to say, spit it out. You're going to wear a hole in your breeches."

"Pure speculation." Dorian retorted. "But yes, I wanted to thank you again for getting back my amulet. It means a lot to me."

"I was glad to help but why did you not tell me you sold it? I lived there Dorian, I know it's importance."

"When I... learned of my father's plans for me I was forced to run. I didn't have much time to pack. Once I reached the Free Marches, I needed supplies and provisions more than I needed the amulet, so I sold it."

Fenris paused in his eating to stare at him. "You never said the situation with your father was that serious."

"I don't like thinking about it, much less talk about it." Dorian retorted. "I apologize, that came out more harsh than I intended."

"Don't apologize. Tell me what happened Dorian, I want to know."

"Can we finish breakfast first? I'd like to not lose my appetite."

"Of course."

Dorian's eyes softened. "Thank you."

They finished the rest of their meal in silence. Dorian excused himself to change and make himself presentable, leaving Fenris to do the same. The elf pulled on fresh leathers after using a wet soapy cloth to wash the travel dust from his skin. By the time he finished, Dorian was waiting and they set out along the ramparts to talk.

"You sure you don't want to do this privately?" Fenris asked as they made their way around Skyhold's perimeter.

"I'm sure." Dorian nodded. "I need to be outside for this."

They continued walking in silence until they'd reached the tower above the stables where Dorian paused to look out at the rocky landscape.

"I was home for about a week. Alexius and I had parted ways." He began, his eyes looking out across the landscape as though remembering. "We quarrelled, loudly and frequently over his research on time magic and then he started talking about a cult. How if we worked with them, we could change the face of Thedas, reclaim Tevinter's glory. It went against everything he'd ever held dear, but he'd become obsessed after his wife died and I didn't approve of the direction he was taking. I thought I knew everything you see. I didn't understand love since I'd never experienced it myself so I told him to snap out of it, move on..."

He paused, his eyes filling with regret. Fenris moved closer and slipped a hand over the mage's and Dorian gripped it tight.

"Is that when you left?"

"That makes it sound like I had a choice. He told me to get out. That I would never understand why it was so important. So I had no choice, I left with what little I had and ended up in a tavern. I thought he might change his mind after he calmed down."

"But he didn't."

"No. He contacted my father, told him I was no longer his apprentice. My father... had me collected."

"Collected?"

"Magebane in my drink and then hauled back to my parent's home in Qarinus."

Fenris frowned. "He didn't ask you to come home?"

Dorian's laugh was bitter. "He wasn't even there. Servants and spies collected me, it was too scandalous for him to be seen there since it was also a brothel. He paid off everyone there, those who couldn't be bought had... accidents."

"I'm so sorry Dorian."

"Why? You didn't do anything." Dorian frowned. "I didn't know he would go that far just for his... reputation. We argued and he said I was not his son."

Fenris pulled Dorian closer but held his tongue.

"After that I was forbidden to leave the house without an escort. So naturally it's the first thing I did. I tried to leave, which is when I discovered he'd been putting magebane in all my meals."

"He was poisoning you?"

Dorian nodded. "I didn't discover it until the third day. It took another two before I managed to get it out of my system. I'd stolen food from the kitchen and hidden it in my room."

"I assume he found out."

"Actually he knew all along and had been preparing for it, but one of the servants told me what they'd overheard. He was planning to use blood magic to change me. I didn't believe her at first, though I did pack a few things just in case."

"So what happened?"

"He tried to collar me." Dorian swore. "But he underestimated my recovery and I managed to get away. Grabbed the one bag I'd packed and ran."

Fenris pulled Dorian into his arms. The mage resisted but when Fenris refused to let go, he sagged in the warrior's arms, burying his face in his shoulder.

"He came after me." Dorian whispered brokenly. "I had to lay traps to slow down my pursuers. It was only a bit of luck that I managed to get away. I boarded a ship that was minutes from sailing. The men he'd hired to retrieve me watched me from shore trying to get the ship to turn back. Luckily it was a smuggler's ship and the captain thought he'd been discovered so we kept going."

"Your father... treated you like a slave."

Dorian stiffened, pulling out of Fenris' embrace, a look of shock in his eyes. "I don't know if I'd put it that way... exactly."

Fenris scowled. "He tried to collar you Dorian. He was planning to alter your mind, your personality. Make you do what he wanted. He gave no thought to who you are or what you wanted. Aside from not owning you, how is it different?"

The mage paled, his mouth moving but no words came. Tears brimmed in his eyes again and he swiped them away angrily. "I suppose that's why I was in shock for most of my time on the ship. I couldn't figure out why I was so cold, couldn't get warm you know? I thought it was part of the seasickness."

Fenris tensed. Dorian's voice had become distant, detached, as though he were telling a story of someone else's horrors. As though by doing so he could pretend none of it had happened, none of it had been him.

"There's something you're not telling me Dorian." He said, a horrible suspicion occurring to him.

The mage looked at him with a mix of confusion and horror. "I don't know what you're talking about. Furthermore, I don't see how you can possibly have any sympathy for me. You suffered more than anyone I know. My pathetic troubles aren't even worth a second thought, much less your concern."

Fenris blinked. Was he doing this to push him away? No, he actually believed he was as worthless and broken as his father had told him he was. He reached for him, but Dorian stepped nimbly away, pretending he'd been about to look out over the wall.

"Mage you are infuriating."

"I've been told as much before but you'll have to do better if you truly wish to insult me."

"Dorian stop. What your father did was wrong and it's worse because he was supposed to love you, protect you and he didn't. What else happened Dorian? I know there's more, I can see it in your eyes."

The mage looked terrified by this revelation and took several steps back as though through sheer distance, he could continue to keep his secret. "No, there's nothing more. My father was a bastard. He betrayed me and I left." He said, shaking his head and staring at the warrior with a fragile challenge in his eyes.

"Venhedis Dorian." Fenris gasped as a horrible thought entered his mind. "He didn't."

"And now I'm done here." Dorian said sharply moving past him faster than he'd been expecting. "What do you say to a nice red wine in the tavern? I heard the Inquisitor received some expensive labels just this week. I'm eager to try a sample."

Fenris stared after him as Dorian kept going, his pace that of a man haunted and pursued. Growling, Fenris caught him by the shoulder, spun him around and folded him in his arms. Dorian struggled, but Fenris had expected it and only held on tighter.

"Bloody elf, let me go!"

"No."

"I am not a child, damn you!"

"No, you're a man who was betrayed and abused by a man you trusted who was supposed to love you."

"He didn't get to me." Dorian protested though his voice had lost all conviction.

"No he did something much worse than just get to you."

"No." Dorian sniffed. "No..."

"It's all right mage. I will never let him hurt you again."

"I..."

"Let it go Dorian. Just let it go and then we'll get that wine you mentioned."

"Alright." Dorian sighed, relaxing fully in the elf's embrace.

Fenris released his hold as soon as he sensed Dorian was somewhat recovered. Staring into his eyes he placed a gentle kiss to his lips. "Better?"

Dorian nodded, letting the warrior dry his tears. "I must look a right mess now after all that nonsense"

Fenris quirked his lips. "It's not nonsense Dorian and you look fine."

"Fine? Just fine? Maker, it's worse than I thought."

"There is nothing wrong with your appearance mage. Your eyes are bright, but it looks beautiful."

"I hope you're not just saying that."

"Do you know me as someone who wastes words on empty flattery?"

"No. You'd much rather scandalize my delicate sensibilities with unexpected displays of affection."

Fenris turned them back to the stairs as they headed for the tavern. "The only thing delicate about you is your heart mage. And it is a very generous one."

"Maker Fenris, are you trying to get me started again?"

"No. I'm merely trying to get you to stop thinking you don't deserve the admiration. You have more to offer the world than just your looks Dorian. It's past time you realized that."

"Bloody elf." Dorian muttered. "Is it all right with you if we never speak of my past again? I'd really like to move on and focus on more pleasant things."

"What did you have in mind?"

"Fine wines, delectable desserts, missions that don't involve rain or sea or swamps."

"Is that all?" He asked as they entered the tavern.

"Kissing you. Possibly while also naked in Skyhold's public bath."

"That can be arranged." Fenris growled.

"I was hoping you'd say that."

"I want you the same way mage, though I suggest we drop this lest I become tempted to do something scandalous here and now."

"Right. Yes, let's get that wine shall we?"


	28. Orlesians

A few days later all of Skyhold was a hub of activity as the inner circle prepared for the trip to the Winter Palace. All of the Inquisitor's companions and advisors were expected to attend and it had both Dorian and Fenris dreading the event, for vastly different reasons.

Dorian spoke with the Inquisitor about his concerns, but she was disinclined to heed his protests. It was infuriating. He couldn't possibly attend, they were Orlesians for Maker's sake. They would know instantly who and what he was and then the rumours would start. Rumours of dark magic and his presence simply a cover for blood magic, thralls and a desperate, cunning bid for political power and influence. But nothing he said would sway her and his meeting ended with her ordering him to meet with Josephine to be fitted with the Inquisition colours. He swore all the way to the Ambassador's office, passing Varric on his way.

Seeing the look on his face, Varric smirked up at him. "Couldn't get out of it could you Sparkler?"

"No, I bloody well couldn't. The woman is a menace I tell you. She has no idea what she's setting herself up for. It's a disaster waiting to happen."

"Or she knows exactly what she's doing and you're 9worrying about nothing."

"Don't tell me you're looking forward to attending this... Orlesian soiree?"

"Maker's balls Sparkler, of course not. It'll be like attending one of my family dinner parties. But it's to stop Corypheus, so how can I refuse?"

"Ugh." Dorian rolled his eyes. "You know I hate it when you're logical."

"Think positive Sparkler. Better yet think of the expensive food and imported wines."

"Oh, now that's a good point. Thank you Varric, I think I'm feeling decidedly less negative towards this whole affair."

"Always happy to help Sparkler."

\----xxx----

Fenris paced the floor of his room. He'd been informed of his mandatory attendance to the Winter Palace and had done nothing but fume about it ever since. He couldn't go, he was too recognizable and he was certain half the nobles in attendance had business dealings with slavers. Slavers he had killed or hadn't yet gotten around to killing.

He'd either be ridiculed or otherwise accosted or somehow he'd recognize them for what they really were and kill them on sight. It was impossible for neither of these two events to not come to pass. One maybe, but not both, definitely not both. Yet even after he'd spoken to the Inquisitor she wasn't the least concerned. It was infuriating, especially when she'd then calmly added that they would be assigned partners and had asked him to please not kill Dorian for he was to be his partner.

Which was the only thing that had made him pause. It was impossible, but she clearly had no idea he and Dorian were no longer a threat to each other. He'd assumed everyone knew, especially given how both Bull and Varric constantly brought it up, but it had been apparent by what the Inquisitor said that it was not common knowledge for she'd then carefully suggested he and Dorian would make a perfect cover. Plus she'd added, it would give their enemies pause to know that the Inquisition called both a Tevinter mage and the Elven Ghost among their allies.

He'd understood immediately what she was hinting at and he'd at first been insulted and then impressed by her cunning. The nobles of Orlais would not for a second believe that Dorian wasn't a slave owner nor Fenris a free man and they would believe the Inquisition weak. They would seek favours or blackmail and through her own open deception, the Inquisitor would expose her enemies in one fell swoop while also solidifying an alliance with the people of Orlais. In that moment, he'd admired her audacity but in no way did he have to like being used as a pawn in a game he despised.

So like it or not he was going. The only other thing which had been a growing cause for concern was Dorian. They hadn't done anything more than kiss since their talk on the ramparts and that had been more than a week past. The mage was avoiding him but Dorian denied it. True, he had been gone several days on a mission with the Inquisitor. Then he'd been busy monitoring his former mentor's research, which had been followed by writing reports on the subject to both Leliana and Dagna.

But he knew the mage was avoiding him despite all that, certain Dorian would have made time for his lover if he'd truly wanted to. If the man refused to explain himself, their "cover" at the Winter Palace would be even more convincing than necessary. It was not a place for them to argue, but given both their stubborn natures it was inevitable if the mage continued to ignore him.

\----xxx----

Dorian pasted a smile on his face as he followed the Inquisitor and her advisors into the front garden of the Winter Palace. He wondered idly if any of the sneering nobles would find setting random floral arrangements on fire to be too crass. His fingers itched to do just that as he caught some of their comments. Fenris roughly bumped his shoulder, scowling at him while he scanned the crowd for the speaker's source.

"I can feel that mage." Fenris growled. "Control yourself before your nervous fumblings activate my markings and cause a scene."

Dorian gulped and reigned in the tingling in his palms. "Sorry." He whispered back.

"Ignore them. I'm certain there'll be enough opportunities for killing as the night progresses that it won't be necessary to singe every noble in sight."

"Unnecessary maybe, though infinitely satisfying." Dorian retorted, drawing a stifled grunt of laughter from the elf.

They passed through the garden into the vestibule, where several nobles watched with undisguised interest from behind fancy, yet ridiculous masks.

"Those masks are hideous." Fenris scowled in a hushed whisper.

"Just be glad the Inquisitor thinks the same, or we'd be wearing them as well." Dorian whispered back.

"Are we all required to meet the Empress?" The warrior asked.

"I'm not sure."

Just then the Inquisitor turned to them and beckoned them forward.

"Dorian, you will be entering the ballroom with the others to meet the Empress. Fenris, I want you to remain here with Bull, Sera, Blackwall and Solas. Vivienne, Varric, you're also with me. Let's do this shall we?"

Everyone nodded, though a few were unhappy with their instructions, no one objected. Dorian felt his palms dampen as he followed the others into the ballroom. A bored Orlesian voice rang out, announcing each of the Inquisitor's party as they walked the entire length of the ballroom floor. He could feel the eyes of every noble follow him and the sensation made his skin crawl. He hoped the Inquisitor wouldn't insist he remain in the room, he didn't think his nerves could take it.


	29. Playing Pretend

Fenris followed the Iron Bull and Sera out to the gallery. Bull took up a position by the doors leading out to the garden, while Sera took a seat on the opposite side of the long hallway, a scowl on her face.

"You should find a spot in the garden." Bull commented as he snatched up two glasses of wine from a passing servant and handed him one. "Need to have eyes everywhere if we want to catch this assassin."

"Be easier to let the assassin kill their target and then kill them after."

Bull snorted. "True, but it'd be better if we know when they're going strike first."

"I suppose." He nodded. "I'll be in the garden then."

He passed though the doors, breathing deep of the warm night air, grateful there was only a handful of guests present. Crossing to the small waterfall, he wrinkled his nose at the plaque, rolling his eyes at the habits of nobles. Only those who had everything could conceive of such a ridiculous game of throwing away Caprice coins just to show how rich they were.

He was still scowling into the fountain when someone spoke behind him.

"Caprice for your thoughts?" Dorian smiled as he turned to face the mage.

"It is a stupid game." He growled.

"I have some coins if you'd care to toss them in."

"I have no interest in playing childish games with useless coins."

"Really?" Dorian arched a brow. "I thought you might find it amusing to toss Caprice coins into an Orlesian fountain. Imagine the scandal."

Fenris scowled. "You're right. Scandalizing these people would amuse me. Where are the coins?"

"In my pocket. Give me a moment, I'll get them for you."

"No mage, I will get them."

"Don't be ridiculous."

"We're meant to be distracting the nobles are we not? Hiding in plain sight? A master would not hand coins to a slave Dorian."

Dorian's face went bright red at that. "But I'm not... and you're not..." He stuttered.

"It's part of the Game. Now tell me which pocket before I search you."

The mage looked as though he was about to faint as all the colour drained from his cheeks. "You wouldn't." He choked.

Fenris smiled. "Wouldn't I?"

Dorian gulped, downing a large swallow of the wine he held. "Left front jacket pocket."

Fenris looked down, his eyes lingering on where the mage's jacket parted down the middle. "Closer to the front of the pocket or the back?"

Dorian's eyes went wide. "You're not seriously teasing me here? In front of nobles in an Orlesian garden?"

"I am." He nodded, taking a step closer to the mage. "Perhaps you should not have avoided me back in Skyhold."

"I... I told you. I wasn't avoiding you, I was busy."

"Truth mage or I might forget which pocket holds the coins."

Dorian gulped but was saved from answering with the arrival of the Inquisitor.

"Oh good." She said, her smile bright. "Here you are. I'm glad the two of you seem to be getting along."

"Yes. Getting along quite well Inquisitor." Dorian beamed, though Fenris could see the nervousness behind it which the Inquisitor missed.

"Well good. I'm glad you're not still trying to kill each other because I need you do something for me."

"What do you need Your Grace?" Fenris answered, noting how confused Dorian was over her ignorance regarding their friendship.

"I need to get into the library up that trellis over there. Think you two can come up with a distraction?"

Fenris' smile was almost predatory as he caught Dorian's eye. "We were just working on that actually."

"Excellent! I'll talk to some of the guests here and wait until you have their attention." She said with a smile before moving away from them.

"Now." Fenris growled low in his throat as he moved to Dorian's left. "Why were you avoiding me?"

"I... I.." Dorian stammered as Fenris inched closer.

"I'm waiting mage."

"Fine. Since you are so determined. I was... embarrassed after our talk. I know it's foolish but there it is."

"You have nothing to be ashamed of Dorian. Not with me." He said slipping a hand in his pocket. "How many coins?"

Dorian's heart skipped, the elf's hand had stopped moving and he'd flattened it along Dorian's hip, the heat radiating towards his groin. "Ten... ten coins." He croaked. Maker he was going to kill him.

"Mmm." Fenris hummed, curling his fingers in Dorian's pocket and lifting the coins free.

"I hope you're enjoying this." He hissed.

Fenris smiled. "Very much. Now command me."

Dorian almost choked. "What?!"

"We're a distraction mage. Command me what to do with the coins."

"No. Now you're taking this too far."

"Command me or I'll call you master."

"Vishante kaffas!" Dorian hissed, flushing red. "Fine. Toss those coins in the fountain. One at a time. Do not drop them either." He growled, loud enough to draw the attention of some nearby guests.

"As you wish." Fenris said, inclining his head in deference. Turning, he did as Dorian had asked, everything in his posture that of a brow-beaten slave.

Dorian was furious. He didn't care they were meant to be a distraction, he didn't like being ambushed, especially not like this. If it wasn't for the Inquisitor he would have taken immense satisfaction in pushing the elf into the fountain head first.

Fenris turned and blinked at Dorian's expression before dropping his eyes and looking up through his fringe to wink at him. Perhaps he'd gone too far but Dorian's fluster was far too arousing.

Dorian glared at him as he returned to his side. "Are you quite finished with this game of yours?" He snapped.

"Has the Inquisitor returned?"

"Not yet."

"Then no."

Dorian crossed his arms and wouldn't look at him.

"Dorian."

"What?"

"I'm sorry. I should have warned you."

"Yes you bloody well should."

Fenris smiled and leaned closer, letting his tongue slip out to wet his bottom lip. "Will you allow me to make it up to you?"

Dorian inhaled sharply. "I'm not even certain I want to talk to you. And stop doing that thing with your tongue."

"Why?"

Dorian huffed and looked away.

"Mage." Fenris growled.

"Because you bloody man, my breeches are already too tight as it is."

Fenris laughed, drawing more stares from the nobles and making Dorian stiffen further. The Inquisitor appeared then, eyeing Dorian with a concerned expression.

"Everything all right?" She asked.

Dorian smile was bright. "Very well thank you. Everything go as planned?"

"I recovered some keys. If the two of you don't mind I think I'll have you search the library for me. I need to stay visible while we're here."

"We don't mind at all Your Grace." Fenris said.

"Excellent. Good to see you two getting along so well. Anyway I'll be back after I've spoken with my advisors."

"Why does the Inquisitor believe we aren't getting along?"

"I don't know. I thought given how Bull and Varric talk everyone knew otherwise."

"I had thought the same."

Fenris frowned. "Dorian? You sound disappointed."

"Don't be absurd."

Fenris touched his hand and turned the mage to face him. "You are. Why?"

"I don't know. Honestly."

"Then we'll have to do something about it."

"Such as?"

"I could kiss you."

Dorian blushed. "Doing that here would definitely be misinterpreted. Plus I might accidentally set something on fire."

"You're joking."

"I'm not unfortunately. I did it once during an exciting moment with a rather talented young man. Set the curtains on fire."

The Inquisitor returned looking flushed. "Oh good. You're still here. Here's the key to the library, see what you can find then come see me in the ballroom."

Dorian turned to Fenris. "Shall we?"

"After you."


	30. Stolen Moment

They searched the library and found several incriminating documents and a clue which they returned to the Inquisitor. She thanked them and said she would be investigating the servant's quarters soon.

Dorian led Fenris from the ballroom, back toward the gardens, but Fenris stopped him with a touch to his arm. He turned to see the warrior watching him, a hungry look in his eye.

"Not back to the garden."

"What?"

"Follow me mage." He whispered huskily, leading him to the stairs up to the library.

"Fenris." Dorian hissed. "What are you doing?"

"I still have the key, I want you alone Dorian."

"Now? Here?"

Fenris grabbed his hand and pulled him through the door to the library, closing and locking it behind them. Then he was pushing the mage up against the wall as he caught his lips in a bruising kiss. Dorian moaned against him, the feel of Fenris pressed against him without his customary armour sending thrills of pleasure down his spine and he felt himself growing hard.

Dorian pulled Fenris closer, forcing a knee between the elf's legs. He growled, breaking the kiss to lick and nibble his way down the elf's long neck.

"Mage." Fenris growled, grinding his length into Dorian's hip. "You're playing with fire."

"I thought you liked playing with with fire." Dorian whispered, his voice heavy with need. "You did well enough in the garden."

"I seem to remember I said I would make it up to you." Fenris growled, licking a line up the mage's neck making him shudder.

"Fenris..." Dorian gasped. "We... we can't. The Inquisitor... will be looking for us."

"I don't think it will take long." The elf whispered, dropping to his knees, his hands already working loose the laces of Dorian's breeches. "I've wanted you for days."

"Like minds then." Dorian whispered, his thoughts lost to sensation as Fenris freed his swollen member, hissing in surprise at the hot wet mouth that wrapped around his length.

"Kaffas!" He swore as Fenris swirled his tongue along Dorian's shaft and began to slide his lips along his length, sucking with abandon. "Fenris... Maker... I can't..."

Fenris hummed and moved his mouth faster along Dorian's swollen length, drawing another gasp from his lover. Dorian's hands tangled in the elf's hair as his hips began to move in time with the eager mouth sucking at his length and taking him deep in his throat. His body trembled, his orgasm sending wave after wave of pleasure coursing through him and he came crying the elf's name.

Fenris released him and Dorian dragged him up, claiming his mouth with a needy kiss, his legs still trembling from the pleasure the warrior had drawn from him.

"My turn." Dorian whispered, dropping to his knees and taking the elf's breeches down as he pressed Fenris' back to the wall. "Maker you're beautiful." He whispered before taking the elf's length in his mouth.

"Mage..." Fenris gasped, the feel of Dorian's skilled tongue sending shivers of pleasure up his spine.

"Mmm." Dorian hummed.

"I need..." He gasped, clutching at Dorian's shoulder to keep himself from falling.

"Take your pleasure from me Fenris, I want you to come for me."

"Ah Dorian..." He cried, his hips rocking forward into the mage's ready mouth. "I'm coming mage..."

Dorian hummed, increasing the hold he had on the elf's length with his lips as Fenris jerked above him, his warm seed shooting down his throat as he swallowed it eagerly. Fenris stilled, his breathing harsh as he pulled Dorian to his feet. He crushed the mage to him as he came back to himself, leaning his weight on him while he remembered how to breath. Dorian turned his head to the side to plant a soft kiss to the warrior's cheeks.

"Am I forgiven?" Fenris whispered, continuing to plant light kisses on the mage's lips.

Dorian smiled into his kiss. "Yes... more than forgiven. You are extraordinary."

"Also still naked." He said, smiling wryly. "We should get back before someone comes looking."

"Mmm, yes." Dorian sighed. "Do you think anyone will notice a difference in us?"

"Do you want them to?" He asked as they both fastened their breeches and put their clothes back in order.

"I'm fine if they do, though I wouldn't mind keeping you to myself a while longer."

"Then I guess we'll see." He said, unlocking the library door and holding it open for Dorian to pass him.

"Also, I apologize again for avoiding you. Maker, I missed this." Dorian whispered.

"This?" Fenris asked turning back to him, puzzled.

Dorian kissed him. "This."

"Mmm. As did I."

A gasp nearby had Dorian leaping away from the elf as though he'd been burned, Fenris' mouth twitching in amusement as the mage flushed crimson. He glared at the noblewoman who'd seen them, sending her hurrying away in fright.

"Well, that just happened." Dorian grumbled.

Fenris chuckled. "Just remember, you kissed me."

"I did, didn't I? Oh well. We'll see if our unfortunate witness spreads the tale."

"It could be a long night if she does." Fenris observed as they returned to the garden.

"It was a kiss Fenris, it's not like I ravished you in front of her."

"You think that will matter? They're nobles Dorian."

"Kaffas."

Fenris smirked. "Come on, let's get back to the garden."

Whoever the woman who'd seen them had been, it was clear she hadn't been important enough for anyone to believe what she'd witnessed, or just didn't care. That, or she had no one to tell her gossip to. It left Dorian feeling conflicted. A small part of him had felt relief at being caught, no more hiding or wondering what people would say, while another part was disappointed no one knew. It made it easier to pretend he was just playing a role but regardless, despite his ingrained fear of discovery he didn't regret kissing the elf or being seen. If they hadn't been on a mission to stop the assassination of the Empress, he would have seriously considered kissing him again in the garden. Fenris was frowning at him, his brow arching imperceptively as they made their way back to the fountain.

"I've never met anyone who thinks as loud as you do." He muttered under his breath. "What has you looking so odd mage?"

"Nothing earth shattering I assure you."

Fenris opened his mouth to reply but they were interrupted by the return of the Inquisitor. "Dorian, I need you to come with me on this next bit." She said. "Fenris, I need you to stay here or at least in the general vicinity. We're heading to the servant's quarters. Keep a lookout for anything out of the ordinary."

"It will be done." Fenris nodded.

"Ready Dorian?"

"More than ready Inquisitor." He said, giving Fenris a strange look that had the elf blink back in surprise, an unfamiliar tightness in his chest. "See you soon Fenris."

He nodded, noting the confusion that flickered in the Inquisitor's eyes as she led Dorian from the garden.


	31. Nobles

Dorian sighed with pleasure as he donned his fancy armour and gripped his staff after they'd entered the kitchen. As much as he enjoyed dressing in finery, the Inquisition's formal wear was little more than a fancy uniform and he was glad to be out of it, even for a short time. He, along with the Inquisitor, Cassandra and Varric worked their way through the servant's quarters, looking for clues to the identity of the assassin. They hadn't gone far when they stumbled over a body and were attacked.

"Who were those people?" Varric asked, holstering Bianca.

"They looked like Venatori, but I believe those were actually harlequins." Dorian answered.

"Is that Duke Gaspard's dagger?" Cassandra wondered, retrieving the blade from the body they found.

"Seems a bit on the nose if it is." Dorian observed. "Especially since we're meant to be investigating and came as his guests."

The Inquisitor nodded. "I agree. Let's keep looking."

They moved through the garden to another wing and were attacked by more Venatori.

"Your countrymen do get around Sparkler." Varric mused.

"They may get around but they are no friends of mine."

"Speaking of friends." The Inquisitor looked up at Dorian as she searched the bodies. "You and Fenris seem to be getting along well."

Dorian blushed. "Yes, well, we've come to a bit of an understanding."

"Is that what you call it?" Varric chuckled. "I'll have to remember that one."

"What are you on about now dwarf?" Cassandra demanded, fixing him with a glare.

"Sparkler?"

Dorian sighed. This was it, might as well confess now. "Fenris has asked if he might court me. I... said yes."

"He what?!"

"Sweet Holy Andraste."

"Bout time"

"Dorian? Are you serious?" The Inquisitor asked. "I thought he didn't like mages."

"Apparently that's changed. I'm not sure he likes mages exactly but he did say he no longer hated them."

"And you're comfortable being with someone who kills mages by ripping their hearts out of their chest?" Cassandra's eyes were wide with shock.

"He hasn't threatened me, well not recently anyway. But yes I'm fine with it."

"Maker, the world must be ending if a former slave and an Altus are...dating." The Inquisitor mused. "Come on, let's finish up here and get back to the ballroom."

\----xxx----

Fenris remained in the garden a short while after Dorian left with the Inquisitor, but found it hard to remain inconspicuous on his own and moved back inside. Bull and Sera were engaged in some bizarre face making contest, so he left the main gallery to wait close to the entrance to the servant's quarters.

He nursed a glass of wine while he stood there, pretending to be interested in a statue on the lower floor. He hadn't been there long when someone joined him. His shoulders tensed, hoping whoever it was would move on, but instead they moved closer.

"I know who you are elf." A deep male voice whispered from behind him. "Still whoring yourself out too. I saw you and that Magister disappear into the library. I wonder how much he wants for you. Surely a lot less now than what Danarius charged, seeing how you've lessened your worth by sleeping with that traitor."

"Step away from me before I make you." Fenris bristled, his entire body as taut as a bowstring.

A cold, meaty hand came down on his shoulder and his connection to his markings vanished leaving him cold. He shivered, unable to contain his reaction and the man behind him laughed. "That's right slave. Now you can't rip my heart out like you did your poor master. No sword either and your new master nowhere to be seen."

"I have no master. Let go of me."

"I don't think so." The man said, keeping his hand in place. "Turn around and walk to the bench by the stairs."

"No."

"Do it or I'll do more to you than just remove your connection to the lyrium. You know what I'm talking about."

Fenris knew exactly what he meant and had no desire to feel that kind of pain. It might draw attention if the man hurt him, but with the pain came the ability to silence him as well. No one would hear a thing. So he did as the man asked and crossed to the bench.

"Sit."

And Fenris sat.

"Look at you sitting there in that fancy Inquisition uniform. Making it seem like you're one of them. But that's a lie. We both know you'll always be slave. Now open that pretty mouth of yours and suck my cock like the talented whore you are."

\----xxx----

Dorian went straight to the garden when he returned from the ballroom, looking around in confusion when he saw no sign of Fenris. Where could he have gone?

"Bull. Have you seen Fenris? He's not in the garden."

"Saw him head into the trophy room. Maybe he's there."

"So helpful." Dorian drawled. Was the qunari truly that daft? He had already passed through the trophy room to get here and hadn't noticed him, but then he also hadn't been paying much attention. With a frown, he headed back the way he'd come and saw the room empty. Except this time he heard someone speaking.

_"...open that pretty mouth of yours and suck my cock like the talented whore you are."_

Dorian blinked, his face flushing as white hot rage coursing through him when he caught sight of the speaker. Fenris was seated on a bench while a burly, Orlesian noble held something near Fenris' face, the elf's eyes murderous. Neither man had noticed him and he found himself moving faster than he thought possible. His hands oozing with magical power, he touched a finger to the man's shoulder, sending a surge of electricity through him. The noble jerked violently, his body moving like that of an out of control marionette before falling to the floor in a twitching heap.

Dorian ignored him, his eyes going to his lover's face as Fenris lept to his feet, snarling like an angry beast. He glared down at the man, a look of pure hatred on his face. Dorian's first instinct was to reach for him but for the first time he was afraid of the elf. Clenching his hands into fists to curb the impulse, he stepped back to give Fenris space.

"I realize how stupid this might sound, but, are you all right?"

Fenris shot him a look that made him flinch and he swallowed, his mouth suddenly dry.

"No."

"I have to ask. Why haven't you ripped his heart out?"

"Because he cut the link to my lyrium with a contact poison. Filthy Vint." Fenris spat, stepping away from the still twitching body.

"I... had no idea that was possible."

"Danarius needed it in case I ever got out of control." Fenris continued, his words venomous. "Anyone he lent me to was given the recipe."

"Lent?" Dorian repeated in confusion before he could stop himself.

The look Fenris gave him was not just angry but cold and dead as if he no longer saw Dorian but every man who'd ever laid hands on him without his consent. He felt as though the elf had ripped his heart out and couldn't maintain eye contact.

"Yes, well we should inform the Inquisitor." He stammered, covering his sudden fear. "Would you mind getting the Iron Bull while I watch him?"

"I mind. But I will go."

As soon as Fenris left Dorian sent another shock of electricity through the man at his feet, taking sadistic pleasure in his pain as he lost control of his bladder. Fenris returned with Bull and after sharing a look with the giant qunari, he went in search of the Inquisitor. He returned with Cullen to find Bull alone and Fenris gone.

"Where's Fenris?" He demanded.

"Sent him off with Sera. Didn't think he'd want to stick around while we explain this asshole to Cullen."

"Probably wise." Dorian agreed.

"So what happened?" Cullen asked, looking from Dorian to the half-dressed man still writhing on the floor.

"He assaulted Fenris."

Cullen's eyes went wide with shock. "How is that possible? And if so, why is he not missing his heart?"

"Fenris said this disgusting bit of trash used a contact poison to severe the connection to his lyrium."

"But..."

"Yes I know." Dorian nodded. "Even without that he could've killed him with his bare hands. I assume there's more to it but as you can imagine, he didn't want to talk about it."

"I assume they know each other?"

"I think "know" would be stretching it Commander, but this man has been in Tevinter and knew Danarius personally."

Cullen flushed, eyes wide with shock. "You're saying he's done this to Fenris before."

"From what I gathered, yes."

"Maker's breath. Very well, Bull do you think you can carry him? I'll have him taken back to Skyhold for questioning. After that, perhaps the Inquisitor can speak to Fenris about what to do with him."

"If possible, could we keep this quiet? I think Fenris would appreciate it."

"Of course. He's suffered enough already, we don't need to add to it by making this public."

"Thank you Commander."

"It's no trouble." He said, turning and leading Bull to a passage outside the palace.

Dorian sighed and went in search of Fenris. Instead he found Sera, sitting on the fountain tossing coins she'd clearly stolen from the fountain back into the water.

"I see you've made yourself at home."

"Stupid nobles with their stupid coins. What's the point if they ain't worth nothin?"

"A good question for another time. Where's Fenris? Bull told me he was with you."

"Glowy stormed off ten minutes ago. Said he had to walk or he was going to punch a noble. I said all nobles need a bit of ear boxing and he said he probably shouldn't start cuz he didn't think he'd be able to stop."

Dorian felt a chill run through him. "Do you know which way he went?"

She shrugged. "Maybe the lower garden? Not sure. What's he so pissed about anyway? He wouldn't tell me, just glared and clamped his mouth shut."

"It's not for me to say, though he does have a very good reason to be angry. If you'll excuse me Sera, I'm going to go look for him."

"Suit yourself. But I'd stay out of his reach if you're at all fond of breathing."

"I'll keep it in mind."


	32. Running from the Past

Fenris couldn't stay still. With a growl to Sera he'd stormed away from the garden and the gallery, taking a passage to a lower courtyard. He snarled to himself when he realized the garden led nowhere and almost left, but he had no desire to return to the fountain or the gallery.

Varric saw him, his smile turning to concern at his appearance, but Fenris shook his head and the dwarf returned to his conversation, his eyes never leaving the elf. Fenris paced the edge of the garden, his mind and emotions whirling like a storm inside him. He was angry and frustrated, but more than that furious and ashamed Dorian had seen what was happening and that Fenris hadn't reacted sooner. He blamed himself for not moving away from the man before being cornered. He'd been complacent and let his guard down.

He stopped pacing and moved to lean against a trellis, arms crossed, face clouded, his posture a shield meant to keep people away. He had a clear view of the area when he felt eyes on him. He scanned the crowd, catching sight of Dorian watching him from the corner of his eye. He tensed, expecting the mage to come to him, but Dorian didn't move. He could see him hesitating, a flurry of conflicting emotions on his face, but he remained rooted in place.

He watched as in a blink of an eye, all the tension drained from Dorian's body as though someone had sucked all the air from him. The mage's eyes then filled with such a profound sadness, Fenris felt it like a knife in his chest. His breath caught as Dorian turned back the way he'd come, disappearing from view. The urge to follow rose like a panic, but he stamped it down, ignoring it. He couldn't talk to him now, didn't want to talk to him or discuss what had happened in the trophy room. So he remained where he was, a storm of emotion and waited for the evening to end.

\----xxx----

Dorian returned to the garden but couldn't stay there and made his way to the vestibule. What he'd seen in Fenris' face and the way he'd looked at him... Maker. And what he'd said... he couldn't get any of the awful images he'd seen in the past thirty minutes out of his mind. Fenris helpless and angry, looking up at his abuser, Fenris snarling at him and not seeing him, then Fenris in the garden, isolated and alone looking not like a man, but more like a cold dead statue or a lifeless piece of furniture.

All of it chilled him and all of it made him feel how desperately foolish he was being to allow anything to continue between them. It didn't matter that Fenris said he cared or didn't see him like other mages. His past would forever haunt him and Dorian knew he wasn't good enough for the warrior. It was evident in how he'd reacted to the elf's admission of being loaned out to his former master's associates, like a tool or a thing. It curled his stomach and made him wish again that he somehow could have prevented any of it from happening. But it was a stupid wish. It had happened, he hadn't prevented anything and now it was too late. The damage to Fenris was done and nothing he could do would ever change that. But he could stay away from him, let the warrior find someone else, someone better than an outcast mage. Someone who was worthy of him, but most of all someone who was not a mage.

Dorian looked up when Cullen stepped out of the ballroom and crossed the room to where Dorian stood. "The man who attacked Fenris is on his way to Skyhold as we speak."

"Good."

"May I ask how you're doing? I can't imagine what you went through upon witnessing what was about to happen."

"It was no picnic, though I imagine my experience was nothing to what Fenris is going through."

"Still. I understand the two of you had become close. Are you all right?"

"I'll be fine... eventually. But thank you for asking."

"And Fenris?"

"I'm sure he'll also be fine, though I haven't spoken to him if that's what you want to know. He's not really in the mood at the moment."

"Understandable. I do have some good news. The assassination was prevented and peace has been restored. We'll be heading back to Skyhold in the morning."

"Wonderful news commander, though if our job is done why are you not in there celebrating with our illustrious Inquisitor?"

Cullen blushed, ducking his head. "Maker, does everyone know?"

"Only those of us who notice these things."

"Right well, I just wanted to let you know the situation before I return to the ballroom."

"Commander, I wonder if I might make a small request before you go?"

"Of course."


	33. Cole Wants to Help

Fenris saw Varric receive a message and he followed the dwarf out of the garden after reading the look in his eyes.

"You look pissed elf. Something I should know about?"

"No."

"It's not about Sparkler is it?"

"It has nothing to do with the mage."

"Okay then. Let me know if you change your mind. I'm here if you wanna talk later."

"Thank you Varric but it won't be necessary."

"Suit yourself."

They returned to the main hall to find the crisis averted and peace restored. Anyone who wanted to stay for drinks was welcome to, otherwise they could return to the rooms they'd been assigned in the palace. Fenris had no desire to remain and followed the others who didn't wish to stay. Dorian wasn't present so he assumed the mage was still in the ballroom taking his fill of the fine wines on offer.

He was not looking forward to returning to his room since everyone had needed to share and he was sharing with Dorian. Sera, Blackwall, Solas, Varric and Cassandra also left, while Bull, Vivienne, Dorian and the Inquisitor's advisors remained. No one knew where Cole was but the spirit boy didn't sleep so no one paid much attention.

Fenris bid them all goodnight and slipped into the room, exhausted and tense. He had no idea when Dorian might return but wanted a bath before he had to face him again. He stripped out of his formal attire and drew a bath, collecting his sleep pants before closing and locking the bathing room door behind him. He was dried and changed an hour later, becoming more tense as time dragged on and there was still no sign of Dorian. Voices in the hall drew his attention, recognizing those who had remained behind, but no Dorian. Frustrated, he donned a plain tunic and was about to step into the hall when a voice stopped him.

"Watching and wounded, guarded and lonely. You can't stop the anger and it hurts. It hurts so much. Why must it still hurt?"

Fenris snarled, rounding on the spirit-boy. "Begone demon. I am not in the mood for your games."

"But you're hurting and angry. So very angry. Wanting comfort but hating it. It's weak to want more. Where is he? Wondering, waiting, why is he not here?"

"I'm warning you. Leave me be."

"He's not coming."

"What? What are you talking about? Who's not coming?"

"Dorian. Wistful, yearning, heart hurts. No crying. Stop it Dorian. I am a fool, I care but I'm not enough. Never enough. He'll thank me later. Why must it hurt? Why is it hard? I couldn't stop it, can't fix this. It's better this way."

Fenris paused, the spirit's words worming their way past the anger and the hurt and he realized Cole was talking about Dorian.

"Why is Dorian not coming Cole?"

"Better this way. He needs space. I can't help, not enough. He deserves better than me. He switched rooms. He's sharing with the Iron Bull. No one is sharing yours now."

"He did what?"

"He wanted to help. Wanted to give you space. Wants to touch, to hold and protect. But the way you looked at him. Maker, he doesn't even know me. He's afraid he'll make it worse. Better if I stay away."

"Kaffas!"

"You're angry but not at him. Why do you think what happened is your fault?"

Fenris glared at him. "Enough demon. I'm tired and I can't listen to this anymore."

"But you're hurting. I want to help."

"Then help by leaving me in peace."

"Hiding won't help. But I will do as you ask." Cole vanished then and Fenris sat down on the bed, his thoughts conflicted.

He didn't want Dorian to avoid him, but confronting him while sharing a room with the Iron Bull was out of the question. So instead, he doused the lights and fell into a fitful sleep plagued by dark images and harsh words.

\----xxx----

"You wanna talk about it Dorian?" Bull asked quietly.

He was seated in a chair in their shared room, staring at nothing while rolling the hem of his sleeve absently through his fingers.

"Not really, no."

"Think you should. One of you has to and I don't think it's gonna be the elf."

"You heard what I told Cullen. What more is there to know?"

"If there's nothing more then why avoid him?"

"Because I'm a mage and I'm from Tevinter. I'd think that's reason enough."

"Didn't stop you before. Didn't stop him either."

Dorian huffed and dragged a weary hand over his face. "Because he can do better. He deserves better."

"Bullshit."

"It's the truth."

"No it isn't. That's just the crap your father fed you to get you to fall in line. That's not who you are Dorian."

"He looked at me as if I were a stranger."

"Course he did Vint. He was in shock."

"But you didn't hear what he said." Dorian protested.

"Oh come on Dorian. He was hurt, angry and in shock. He'll get past it and then you two can talk."

"I don't think so."

"Shit Dorian. I knew you were hard on yourself, but I never took you for a coward."

Dorian didn't answer.

"Fine. Do what you want then, stubborn Vint. I'm going to bed."


	34. Abandoned

Dorian avoided Fenris all the way back to Skyhold, keeping his horse close to the Iron Bull. He saw Bull glare at the mage and say something, then shrug and return to his conversation with Sera. Whatever Bull had said hadn't affected the mage for he didn't leave the qunari's presence for even a minute and Fenris didn't know what to do.

Back in Skyhold, Dorian vanished before he could stop him, so he headed to his quarters to change and to decide what he should do next. After changing, he had every intention of finding the mage and confronting him but his body had other ideas. As soon as he sat on the bed, his eyes drifted closed. He hadn't slept much and the stress of what had happened caught up to him and he passed out, exhausted.

The following morning he woke feeling drained and disoriented until he remembered Dorian. Leaping to his feet, he stormed from the room and burst through Dorian's door intent on confronting him, but the room was empty and cold. Dorian's things tidied and put away with such deliberate efficiency it felt abandoned. Cold descended in his gut and the next thing he knew he was sprinting through the Keep to Josephine's office. He burst through the door, gasping, his eyes wild, startling both the ambassador and the noble she was speaking to.

"Serah Fenris." Josephine said, recovering instantly. "My apologies my Lord Chevais, but I must take this meeting."

"Of course my dear Lady Montilyet, I understand. I shall return at a more convenient time."

"Thank you My Lord."

Josephine waited until the noble left before turning to Fenris, concern in her eyes. "Serah Fenris, what can I do for you?"

"Where's Dorian?"

"Lord Pavus has gone on a mission for the Inquisitor with Sera and the Iron Bull. They should be back in a few days."

"But his room looks abandoned."

"Oh yes. Well, Dorian had asked to have his things packed away. He was concerned they might be damaged by the elements without anyone there to light a fire while he's gone."

"Oh." Fenris said feeling his heart rate slow. "Well, thank you for the information Lady Ambassador and I apologize for interrupting your meeting."

"It's no trouble. Lord Chevais is most unpleasant to speak with and so I welcome the interruption. Though now that you're here, the Inquisitor would like to speak to you in private. She's in the War Room but will be finished shortly if you don't mind waiting."

"I will wait. Thank you."

"Of course Serah Fenris."

He'd only been waiting a short while when the door opened and Cullen appeared.

"Fenris. Good, you're here. The Inquisitor is waiting inside." He said, holding the door for him.

"Thank you."

The Inquisitor looked up as he entered, smiled and bid him sit.

"Cullen told me what happened in Halamshiral. I am so sorry you had to go through that, though I'm glad Dorian was there to help. I'm sure you'd rather not discuss it so I'll just move on. The man who attacked you is currently in our dungeon. Cullen has questioned him and Leliana will be asking her own questions later today. I wanted know if you might know anything more that would help us learn more about him and his connections."

"He's a slaver. Well known and well funded. He has many connections all throughout Thedas, though his main base is somewhere in Antiva."

"Oh! That's more than I expected. Thank you Fenris. Is there anything else that might help?"

"His clients number among some of the most powerful and dangerous Magisters in Minrathous. He has few enemies and countless supporters."

"I assume taking him out of the equation will do little to change anything?"

"There are half a dozen more directly beneath his authority. He will not be missed, though it will shift the balance of supply until someone takes over."

"I see. Well thank you, your information will likely prove invaluable. One more thing before you go." She said as he rose to leave. "Should the prisoner become expendable, what do you recommend?"

"Death."

"And would you be interested in carrying out his sentence?"

Fenris' jaw dropped. "Uh.. no, thank you Inquisitor, I see enough death and prefer to deliver it on a battlefield. Though I would appreciate it if you could let me know when the deed is done."

"Of course Fenris. I'll have Cullen inform you personally when the time comes."

"Thank you."

\----xxx----

"Oh! Serah Fenris." Josephine called as he passed through her office. "Leliana asked to speak with you when you have a moment. She's in the rookery at present."

"Alright, I'll go there now."

"Ah Fenris. Glad you could come see me so soon, I have a letter for you from Dorian. I heard about the awful business in the Winter Palace and I'm glad Dorian was there to help." Leliana smiled.

"As am I." He grumbled. "How many people know about this?"

"Aside from Cullen and the Inquisitor, just Dorian and the Iron Bull."

"Oh. Good."

"I understand your position Fenris, but the people we told was necessary to transfer the prisoner here."

"It's not that, I..."

"You don't have to explain. I assume you've already spoken to the Inquisitor?"

"I have."

"Good. Then I will get back to my work. Good day Fenris."

"Lady Nightingale."

He left Leliana to her work, passed through the library and back to his room, the letter from Dorian clutched in his hand.

_"Fenris,_

_I apologize for not doing this in person, but the Inquisitor had need of me and I didn't want to disturb your rest._

_I am sorry for what happened at the Winter Palace, though I am glad I arrived in time before it could go any further. I hope he didn't hurt you and I do realize that not all injuries are physical._

_Which brings me to the point of this letter. I think it would be best if we end things between us. You can do so much better than me Fenris. Better than a mage and pariah like myself. I am... not worthy of your affections. You have been nothing but kind to me and it means more to me than you can know. I will never be able to repay you as I have nothing to offer of equal value. No future, no home and no family, while you deserve all that and so much more. I'm sorry, but I fear that I will never be worthy of you and feel very strongly you are better off finding someone more worthy._

_I'm sorry._

_Dorian"_

Fenris was furious. He read the letter over a second and third time and with each reading grew more angry and more frustrated. But his anger was not for Dorian, it was for Danarius and everything he'd suffered as a result of his former master. He would not accept that it was over. Dorian had come to mean more to him than anything else in his life. The mage was frustrating, infuriating even, but he was also kind, compassionate, smart and humorous. He had a love of knowledge that was infectious, and a heart that was inspiring, gentle and kind. He didn't care what it took, but he would not let the stain of Danarius' abuses influence his life any longer. Nor would he allow Dorian to suffer for some imagined flaw in which he blamed himself for what happened in Halamshiral.

Once he felt calm enough, he left his room and headed for the tavern. He wanted a drink and faces. Even if he didn't yet feel like talking, he knew staying confined to his room was not what he needed now.


	35. Bad Weather

The day Dorian was due back at Skyhold was blustery and freezing cold. A storm had blown in just after midday and all outdoor work was cancelled due to the lack of visibility. Fenris joined Varric and most of the other companions to share a hot, boozy beverage and to play Wicked Grace.

Fenris wasn't in the mood to play though, despite continuous ribbing from Varric and sat quietly by the fire watching the others play. He hadn't told anyone about Dorian's letter and was very concerned by the weather and the fact the roads were now impassable. If not for Cullen locking down the keep and posting guards to prevent anyone leaving, he would have been out searching for Dorian and the others. He had just finished his first drink when a messenger appeared, snow-covered and shivering to hand him a large, leather bound package in the shape of a small map. Frowning, he set aside his mug and undid the binding holding it in place. Inside were several very official looking documents, signed in triplicate and bearing the mark of the Archon of Minrathous. His heart had begun to pound, first in fear, then in confusion until his hands were shaking so bad he was forced to set the papers down.

He sat there, stunned, unable to process what he'd just read. Turning in his seat he ordered a brandy and took several long swallows before the tremor in his hands subsided. As he was taking another drink the tavern door opened and three Inquisition soldiers entered looking tired but warm. He frowned at them wondering where they had come from. With the papers clutched in his hand, he drank his remaining brandy and made his way to their table.

"Excuse me, but where are you coming from? I didn't think there was anyone returning from a mission today other than the one with Iron Bull."

"We've just come from the keep. Was in a meeting with Commander Cullen for the past hour giving our report."

"Report from where?"

"We's with the Bull's party. Maker blighted weather, almost didn't make it through."

Fenris frowned. "Then where are Bull and the others?"

"Oh! Last I saw they were heading to a meeting with our Lord Inquisitor. Must still be there, Bull was chomping at the bit to reach the tavern and he's not here, so..."

"The Inquisitor? Thank you."

Dorian. It was the only thing on his mind as he stepped out into the biting cold and snow which whipped at his hair and stung his eyes. Despite the short walk, it took him fifteen minutes to reach the keep entrance and another five before someone came to help open the massive door. He stood at Varric's table by the fireplace, shivering and dripping melted snow all over the floor.

A servant came by and at his question, reported that his friends were still with the Inquisitor. He swore but thanked her and headed for his room. He had to speak to Dorian, but wasn't about to camp outside the Inquisitor's door to pounce on him. He needed a change of clothes and a warm coat since he was also not going to do this shivering and looking like a half-drowned kitten.

Back in his room, he stoked the fire to keep it roaring and changed into something warmer than he'd started his day with. Tucking the papers inside his coat, he ran to Dorian's room to light a fire in the hearth. He didn't know how long Dorian would be, but he wanted his mage's room to be warm when he arrived. Once he was finished, he returned to the main hall to wait. After an hour, he couldn't sit still any longer and headed to Josephine's office.

"Serah Fenris." Josephine smiled. "What can I do for you?"

"Is the Inquisitor still in a meeting?"

"Oh, no. She finished that up about an hour ago. I believe she was heading to the tavern or her quarters after that. Do you want me to send her a message?"

"No, that's fine. I'll speak with her another time. Thank you."

Fenris scowled as he left the room. Clearly he'd just missed them while he'd been changing. He had no interest in bracing the storm again so instead he settled once more at Varric's table to wait.


	36. Confronting the Mage

Dorian was exhausted. After their meeting with the Inquisitor he'd headed to the library to grab a book before heading to his room to change and been pleasantly surprised to see a fire had been lit. He sighed as he sank into a chair, hands coming up to cover his face and wondered for the thousandth time if he'd done the right thing when he'd written the letter to Fenris. He'd done well maintaining his composure over the few days he'd been out in the field with Bull and Sera, but in the privacy of his room, his heart was broken, and his tears started to fall. He gave a brief thought to whether the warrior had waited for his return and just as quickly tossed it aside. It didn't matter. After everything he'd done combined with the letter he wrote, it was inconceivable the elf would want anything to do with him now.

Shaking himself, he got to his feet, changed and headed back to the keep and the library. He had a job to do here, he reminded himself as he walked, important research. Research he felt he'd been neglecting and if he couldn't find happiness with a lover as he'd long been told he would never have, he would just have to find it in his work. Seated in his chair, he spoke briefly with the Tranquil to have some hot cocoa sent up and settled in his chair to start research on ancient elvhen magic and whatever he could find on Grey Warden's. His cocoa arrived soon after and he settled in, sipping at the hot beverage while he lost himself in his reading.

\----xxx----

A crick in his neck jerked Fenris awake, blinking in confusion as to why he was sitting alone in the deserted main hall of the keep. A crinkling sound reminded him of the package he'd received and he sprang to his feet, wide awake. Cursing his stupidity, he stormed from the room to the tavern, determined to track Dorian down even if he had to search the entire grounds to find him.

\----xxx----

Dorian had just put down the book he'd been reading from and was drinking from his mug of cocoa when a husky, male voice cut through the silence of the library.

Startled, he jerked his hands, nearly dumping the last of the beverage all over himself. He set it aside and looked up to see Fenris staring at him. The elf's eyes were hard and unreadable, his mouth set in a firm line and so unexpected a sight that Dorian was on his feet in an instant, stepping behind his chair as though he might use it to shield himself.

"Mage."

Dorian gulped, heart racing as Fenris stared at him. "Fenris."

"What is the meaning of this?" He demanded holding up a stack of papers and waving it at him.

"I... I don't know. What is it?"

"Papers. From Tevinter. They have the Archon's seal upon them."

Dorian frowned, then his eyes went wide in understanding. He'd forgotten about that, had set that process in motion weeks ago and hadn't expected to hear back for several more.

"They're official documents." Dorian stammered, finding his voice.

"I'm aware. Why is my name on them Dorian?"

"I... I wrote a letter some time ago and I meant to tell you about it, but I never had time and I honestly didn't expect to hear back this soon."

Fenris scowled, closing the distance between them and dropped the papers to Dorian's chair. He stepped closer, grabbing hold of Dorian's coat and dragging him forward.

"What did you do Dorian?" He demanded, his voice unsteady.

"I.. requested your release from slavery. I had your freedom made official. It... it means no one can ever claim you as lost or stolen property and... well, I haven't seen the papers but, it should also have given you status as a Laetan in the Imperium." Dorian finished, his breathing unsteady.

Fenris blinked, then he was pulling Dorian to him in a crushing kiss of lips and tongue, claiming his mouth with a growl. For a moment Dorian was too stunned to do anything but stand there.

Fenris growled, his hands going to the mage's hips and lower back to pull him closer. Dorian whimpered and then he was kissing him back, his arms slipping around the elf's waist, his grip that of a man drowning. Fenris paused to stare into Dorian's smokey gray eyes, his cheeks wet from the tears which fell from him.

"Mage, mage, mage." Fenris whispered brokenly, placing gentle kisses to Dorian's lips.

"I'm sorry." Dorian cried. "I'm so sorry Fenris."

"For what this time?"

"The letter I wrote, I don't know why I did it. I was so frightened after what happened... and the way you looked at me... I won't blame you if you can't forgive me. Maker knows I don't deserve it."

Fenris sighed and put his hand to his lover's cheek, his own eyes damp with unshed tears. "Dorian you gave me my freedom. I may have taken it by force years ago, but I never dreamed it would ever be made official. And what happened in Halamshiral.... mage, you saved me. You saved me from that thing who had me cornered. You have no idea how grateful I am for that."

"I don't deserve you Fenris." Dorian whispered, looking away.

"Dorian please stop saying that. There's no truth behind it at all. You deserve whatever you desire and if you desire me, then I am yours."

Dorian blinked, his breath still shaky. "You... aren't angry with me?"

Fenris huffed. "I was angry Dorian, but not with you. Whatever you saw... whatever I said, I was angry at Danarius and how he's affected my life. But I'm done with that. I will not allow that demon's memory keep me from finding happiness."

"Are you saying you're happy with me?"

"Only when you're not blaming yourself for every bad thing that's ever happened to me and belittling yourself." Fenris teased.

"I... kaffas. I'm speechless."

Fenris' laugh was deep. "A rare thing and I didn't even have to kiss you to see it."

Dorian frowned. "I don't talk that much."

"You do, but I'm teasing. I enjoy listening to you talk Dorian. You make me smile when you tease me and when you're flustered. You make me feel alive and seen, you have never seen me as a weapon or a tool. You look at me like I'm beautiful and you have the most tender expression in your eyes when I catch you looking."

Dorian huffed. "You did tell me I had a squishy heart."

Fenris kissed him again. "I believe I said delicate and it's a beautiful thing to see Dorian."

Dorian sighed. "Only because I'm terrible at hiding things and you saw right through me."

"How could I not? When I first came here I was nothing but rude to you. I threatened you with death on more than one occasion and yet you still risked your life to save me."

Dorian smiled. "Well I couldn't let an insane Red Templar squash someone as remarkable as you."

"You still thought me remarkable after how I treated you?"

Dorian kissed him tenderly, then kissed him again. He sighed into the kiss, enjoying the feel of the elf's lips on his, his arms holding him close.

"Remarkable yes, very much. For who you are, what you survived, your strength of will, but most of all your passion."

Fenris huffed a breath. "You think I'm passionate?"

"I have slept with you, you know. But yes, you are quite passionate if a bit angry, though you have every right to be."

"Then we have something in common after all mage." Fenris whispered, the last word said with affection.

"What? Passion?"

"I have never met anyone as passionate as you Dorian. Beneath all your derision and snark and flippancy lies a heart of gold."

"Mmm." Dorian hummed pressing a kiss to Fenris' forehead. "I need to ask. I know you said you were grateful, but are you really okay with what I did? I did go behind your back after all."

"Dorian... venhedis but you worry a lot. I am better than okay. I am free."

Dorian smiled and hugged the elf to him, putting all the things he couldn't say into the embrace. "I'm very content right now."

"As am I, but I interrupted you. What were you doing before I came up here?"

Dorian frowned. "What was I..? Oh, just some research."

"And your drink? You seemed to be enjoying it."

"Oh!" Dorian exclaimed. "It's a delicious hot drink Ferelden's came up with called hot cocoa."

"Hot cocoa?"

Dorian's eyes sparkled. "Yes, you have to try it. Especially with the blighted damn weather we're having. Come on." He said, tugging the elf to the stairs. "Let's go raid the kitchen."

"What? Now?"

"Yes now. If there's no one there I can make it for us both."

"You're serious."

"Of course I'm serious. It's delicious hot goodness in a mug. Like liquid candy Fenris. Please?"

Fenris chuckled. "You're like a grown child. Very well, let's get this hot cocoa and then can we return to your room."

Dorian stopped so suddenly Fenris crashed into him. "On second thought, let's just go to my room now."

Fenris poked him in the back. "No, you really want me to try this cocoa and I'm going to. So move."

Dorian sighed, leading them down the stairs. "It's your fault you know, you're very distracting."

"Stop complaining mage."

"Fine." Dorian grumbled, though he hummed happily to himself as they reached the kitchen.


	37. Hot Cocoa

It was late enough that the kitchen was deserted. Dorian seemed pleased as he moved around the room gathering ingredients for the hot cocoa. Fenris settled on a stool, resting his chin in his hands as he watched the mage work. Dorian hummed as he stirred the drink he appeared excited about when he looked up and caught Fenris staring.

"Is there a reason you're looking at me like that?”

"I'm puzzled. You look entirely too comfortable stirring a pot in a kitchen."

"Comfortable? No I just really like this drink and I'm excited to know what you think of it."

"I don't think so."

Dorian frowned. "You think I'm lying?"

"No I think you're hiding something again. Nobles aren't known for being comfortable in a kitchen. Do you know how to cook mage?"

Dorian's cheeks flushed while he continued stirring the pot. "Don't be ridiculous. We had servants and my parents have slaves. That would never be allowed."

Fenris snorted. "As if that would stop you. Besides, you're doing a terrible job of convincing me."

Dorian ignored him and continued stirring, grabbing two mugs from the shelf behind him. He cast an ice spell on the pot's handle before lifting it free of the fire and filling the mugs.

"Here." He said, sliding the mug across to the elf. "Stop scrutinizing me and taste it."

Still eyeing the mage with suspicion, he lifted the mug, blowing on it to cool before taking a sip. He was not prepared for the sweet, minty chocolate that hit his tongue, sliding down his throat in a wave of unexpected pleasure. His eyes widened, taking in Dorian's pleased smile and took another sip.

"Well?" He asked, his voice anxious.

"This is delicious. I regret interrupting you earlier."

Dorian pursed his lips. "Don't be ridiculous. The cocoa is wonderful, but there's no comparison to being with you Fenris."

Fenris smiled and drank more cocoa. "You're only trying to distract me from your ease in the kitchen. Tell the truth mage."

Dorian gave an exaggerated sigh and sank into the chair beside the elf. "I will never get over how painfully observant you are. Does nothing escape your notice?"

"Not always. I was trained to observe as a bodyguard. I… learned more when I was included in Tevinter...parties. In Kirkwall there were so many people hiding things from themselves and others. I learned by watching Hawke and how she could see past the surface of things."

"I'm humbled by what you've had to overcome in your life."

"Just because you were never officially a slave doesn't mean you didn't feel the chains of servitude Dorian."

Dorian looked up at the elf in surprise. "I never thought of it that way before, still..."

"You are strong and brave, your reasons may be different, but I lived in the Imperium. You had to be both just to stay true to yourself and no one in the Imperium would have valued such. But I do. It takes more than mere stubbornness to resist the allure of power."

"Are you saying we're alike?"

"Are we that different? I had to believe my quest for freedom meant something. As did you when you refused to sacrifice who you are to please your parents."

Dorian was quiet a moment as he sipped more cocoa. "Is that what made you come looking for me in the tower?"

"A little… though I was more interested in why you ran up there and didn't come out."

"I never did thank you for that. I wasn't in a good state when you found me."

"I... remember... I was shocked by the change in you. I never told you this, but you scared me that night. I'd never seen you so upset before."

"That's what happens when you try to find answers in a bottle, or so they say... but thank you for interrupting me. If you hadn't, I may have passed out there."

"I'm glad I helped mage and... I hadn't planned to kiss you. But once I had, all I wanted was to do it again."

"I wish I'd known that sooner."

Fenris smirked, turning to cup Dorian's cheek. "I didn't know it was what I wanted until I saw you standing there."

Dorian's eyes softened. "I wish I'd been in a better state at the time. I wasn't really at my best."

Fenris leaned forward to plant a kiss on the mage's lips. "You looked beautiful Dorian. All I wanted in that moment was to make you smile again."

"Well, I'd say you got your wish." Dorian replied, his voice heavy with need as he pressed back against the warrior's lips, putting what he couldn't say into the soft press of lips to his lover.

"Mmm. Let us find a bed mage." Fenris growled, pulling Dorian into his arms as he stood in one fluid movement.

"I like how you think…"


	38. Promises and Favours

Back in Dorian's room, he and Fenris stripped out of their clothes and climbed into bed together. They lay on their sides facing each other, gazing into one another's eyes. Dorian had never seen such expressive pools of green before. The warrior looked at him with wonder and adoration as he stroked his finger across Dorian's cheek. He himself could not help but run his fingers though the elf's hair. It was like the softest silk, running through his fingers like water.

Fenris stared back at the mage, the depths of emotion buried there threatening to spill out and drown him in it's depths. His other hand held Dorian's free one, their fingers laced together, neither in a hurry to do anything more.

"What are you thinking mage?" Fenris whispered, his eyes tracing the line of his hand caressing Dorian's jawline.

Dorian's voice was gruff when he spoke. "I'm thinking I've never felt anything so soft before and that I don't want to stop touching your hair. Why, what are you thinking?"

"That I could drown in the grey-green depths of your eyes and never again know what it is to be alone."

"You're not alone Fenris."

"I have been for many years Dorian. Though for the first time in my life I feel that it might be ending. Do you feel it?"

Dorian moved his hand to the warrior's jaw, tracing a thumb over his lover's lips. "I do and it… scares me, but it also feels like hope."

Fenris chuckled as he slipped a hand to the back of the mage's neck and pulled him in for kiss. "I think you were right to question my sanity the other day. I feel the same, but I'm done allowing fear to choose my course. I would do anything to keep you at my side."

"Oh?" Dorian teased. "Those are dangerous words. What sorts of things would you do Fenris?"

"For starters, would you like to trade favours?"

Dorian frowned. "What kind of favour?"

"I do not follow the Dalish ways, but they have a custom where two people who care for each other are each gifted with something the other owns."

"You mean like a piece of jewellery or a gift?"

"Sometimes. Typically it's something you already own."

"It sounds intriguing. I think I'd like that. Is there something you have in mind that would work?"

Fenris blushed, his free hand brushing a stray lock of hair from Dorian's brow. "You won't like it."

"Just tell me Fenris."

"I want a strip of cloth from your armour to wear on my wrist."

Dorian's eyes widened. "You mean a piece taken from my clothes?"

"Yes."

Dorian smiled. "As scandalous as it sounds to damage parts of my wardrobe, I'm touched by the thought."

"You don't mind then?"

"No. I'm flattered that you want this."

"Is there something of mine you would like as a favour from me?"

Dorian frowned. "I don't know. You can't exactly tear leather from your armour, and I won't ask for a lock of your hair. I like your hair where it is."

"I will think of something." Fenris smiled, drawing Dorian to him for a kiss.

"Mmm. If I could carry your kisses as a favour, I'd ask for that." Dorian sighed against the elf's lips as Fenris pressed his hard length against his abdomen.

"As would I." Fenris growled, rubbing his length against Dorian's erection as he slid his hand between them and began stroking them together.

"Maker, Fenris." Dorian moaned, thrusting against the elf's hand as the warrior continued kissing him. Dorian slid his own hand down to join the elf's as they thrust against each other.

"Mage." Fenris whispered against Dorian's lips. Their breathing was strained as their pace increased, the feel of the other grinding against them, their hands stroking in unison unlike anything either had felt before.

"Oh Fenris…" Dorian sighed, his hips arching into the elf's strokes as his body shuddered it's release, the pleasure coursing through him rippling like waves as Fenris came in his hand.

"Dorian..." Fenris whispered, leaning close to capture the mage's lips with his own. He gazed into Dorian's eyes, his heart thudding with the release of his orgasm and marvelled at the sight of Dorian's sated smile.

"We may not need to exchange favours." Dorian whispered. "I don't want to leave this bed."

"We may not have to if this storm continues."

Dorian chuckled. "I don't think a storm will stop Corypheus, but in the meantime we should get some sleep."

"I agree. I'll get a cloth to clean up."

Dorian groaned, rolling off the bed to stand. "Then I'll change the sheets. I'll have to ask the Inquisitor for more at some point."

Fenris laughed, returning to the mage's side with a damp cloth. "Won't she ask why?"

"I'm certain she will but I don't care. Nothing can diminish what I've found with you." Dorian said, his tone serious as they returned to bed.

"I feel the same mage." Fenris agreed. "No more doubts about being together then?"

Dorian hugged Fenris to him, placing a kiss to the elf's lips. "No more doubts."

"Good." Fenris sighed, his eyes drifting closed. "Goodnight, my mage."

"Goodnight my handsome warrior."


	39. Red Lyrium

Fenris came awake as the sun crested the horizon, suffusing the room with a soft glow. Dorian slept, one arm over his chest, his head tucked close to Fenris' shoulder. His chest swelled with a happiness he'd not felt before, his eyes drinking in the sight of the handsome man in his arms. It was the soul of the man at his side which took his breath away and made him want nothing more than to see the mage smile. He brushed a hand through Dorian's ebony locks, the slight curl in his hair tugging a smile from him.

Dorian stirred, sighing as he blinked sleepily and snuggled closer to the elf's side. "Morning." He murmured, his eyes still closed.

"Morning. Did you sleep well?"

"Mmm." Dorian purred. "I did. Is there a reason for you being awake at this Maker forsaken hour?"

Fenris chuckled. "The sun is up mage. I believe the storm is over. There's the sound of activity happening outside these walls."

"In the snow?" Dorian grumbled. "I think I'll wait till it melts before I venture out again."

"Wasn't it you who said Corypheus won't wait on the weather?"

"I said no such thing."

Fenris sighed, extracting himself from Dorian's hold on him and got up. "Come my mage, we should check in with the Inquisitor."

"It's too early for that." Dorian growled, pulling the sheet up to his chin.

"It isn't. Now get up."

"Bloody elf." Dorian muttered as he rolled out of bed and reached for his armour.

Having dressed and stoked the fire, Fenris watched as the mage fixed his hair and moustache in place. Dorian turned and met his gaze, his face softening at whatever he saw in the elf's eyes. "You're staring Fenris."

"I am." He said, crossing to him and placing a gentle kiss on his lips. "You're a handsome man Dorian Pavus."

Dorian sighed at his touch. "And you're intoxicating. Stop that now, or we'll never leave this room."

Fenris chuckled and released him. "My apologies, but you're right. Let's go."

\----xxx----

"So elf, Sparkler. You're both looking rather cheery this morning. You keep it up and the elf's going to need a new descriptor."

"I've told you before, I don't brood Varric." Fenris retorted, helping himself to an apple.

"You're a champion at brooding elf, don't steer Sparkler wrong."

"Leave me out of this Varric." Dorian sighed, sipping his coffee. "Do you know what the Inquisitor has planned for today?"

"Not sure. I heard we might be heading back to the Hissing Wastes but I've also heard something about Emprise du Lion. I'm not liking the sound of that place."

"Why's that?" Dorian asked.

"Red lyruim and the river there froze solid overnight."

"Red lyrium? Venhedis." Fenris echoed feeling a chill in his spine.

"There's more." Varric continued. "It seems the Red Templars might be mining the stuff."

"Mining Red Lyruim?" Dorian frowned. "That shouldn't be possible. Unless…" A look of horror passed over his features though it was gone almost instantly.

"Unless what?" Fenris asked.

"Nothing. Forget I said anything."

"Mage." Fenris growled.

"Shit Sparkler. This has something to do with that future you went to with the Inquisitor doesn't it?"

Dorian scowled. "I don't need a reminder of that Varric. Excuse me, but I need some air."

Fenris shared a look with Varric as Dorian headed to the garden. "What's this about dwarf?"

Varric shrugged. "Not sure. Sparkler and the Inquisitor went to an alternate future. It's how she knew about the demon army and the assassination plot against the Empress."

"And?" Fenris urged.

"And that's all I know. Neither of them wanted to talk about it. As far as I know they still haven't."

"Kaffas." Fenris swore, getting to his feet. "I'll see you later Varric."

Fenris hurried outside to the garden, spotting Dorian heading up the stairs toward the mage tower. Huffing in frustration, he quickened his pace, catching the mage on the battlements.

"Dorian."

The mage's shoulders slumped, his head bowing as he turned away from the door and made for the ledge looking out over the landscape. "Look, I know you have questions, but I'd prefer not to talk about it."

"Mage." Fenris said, putting his hands to Dorians hips so they were facing each other. "This is a burden to you. Share it and let me help you."

"It's silly. It's a future that never happened, yet I can't forget what I saw."

"Tell me.

"The Warden's demon army marched across Thedas, killing everyone. People suffered… a lot. And… and his followers, they were growing lyrium from people. Mining it from their bodies. I don't know how that was possible. I don't want to know. Our companions were... infected from a year long exposure to the Red Lyruim and were close to death when the Inquisitor and I arrived. When we got outside... the Breach was massive, red lyrium growing everywhere. In a year's time there was nothing left to save. Closing the Breach then would have been pointless."

Fenris pulled Dorian into a hug, holding him close and rubbing his back gently. "It sounds terrible Dorian, but you and the Inquisitor stopped that from happening. That future no longer exists."

"You're right, but it's the lyrium that worries me. If they've found a way to grow it... well, it doesn't bear thinking about."

"So we say no to any excursions to the Emprise then."

Dorian grunted. "If only it were that simple. If the Inquisitor has to go, I can't refuse to help her. Besides, she might need me there for support given I'm the only person who shared her trip to that dismal place."

"You can't go." Fenris growled. "It's red lyrium mage. It's too dangerous. Even Varric fears it."

Dorian sighed. "I know it's dangerous Fenris but if the Inquisitor needs me…"

"You are not going without me if she does." Fenris warned, his grip on the mage tightening.

Dorian smiled, his hands going to Fenris' arms. "After what happened the last time we were separated, I wouldn't dream of it."

"And if the Inquisitor insists?"

"Then I suppose we will have worn out our welcome."

Fenris relaxed in Dorian's arms as the mage pressed a chaste kiss to his lips. "I'm with you mage." He whispered. "Shall we find out what's to be done then?"

"I do. I think we've kept to ourselves long enough. People will talk." Dorian smirked.

"People are already talking." Fenris said as they walked the ramparts to the Haven's Rest tavern.

Dorian tensed beside him. "No they're not. You're making that up."

Fenris laughed. "Naturally, but you should see your face."

"What's wrong with my face? And I don't have a look, I'm merely concerned about how that dwarf is going to portay us. From his _Tale of the Champion_ I got the distinct impression he tends to exaggerate… a lot."

At that Fenris tensed. "I will speak to Varric about it."

"I wish you luck. Varric doesn't seem like the type to scare easily." Dorian murmured, holding open the attic door of the tavern, letting Fenris precede him inside.

"Well now I've seen everything." Sera drawled as they reached the main floor of the tavern. The blonde elven girl was sitting on a barrel, swinging her legs and munching on a cookie. She smirked at them and cackled as they met her knowing look.

"And what pray tell have you seen?" Dorian asked, taking a seat nearby.

"You and elfy. A mage and a grumpy elf. Together."

"I am not grumpy." Fenris grunted, taking up a position away from her, his arms crossed over his chest.

"Riiight. Cuz saying it like that is going to convince me. So I 'spose you two are going to be all insufferable now? All mooney puppy eyes and _ooo yes, like that and oh Maker, mmmm mmm yes, oh don't stop."_

Dorian blushed and put a restraining hand to the elf's thigh as he tensed beside him. "I don't know where you get such ridiculous ideas but I assure you, that will not happen."

Sera rolled her eyes and snorted. "Maybe not where anyone can see magey-bits, but tents are made of fabric… _f-a-bric._.. and sound carries in the dark when there's nothing else going on."

"Are you telling us you're in the habit of eavesdropping on people?" Fenris asked, arching an eyebrow at her. "Because if you are, there's a hairy little man you should talk to."

"What? The dwarf? The one who talks a lot but never says anything?"

Fenris smirked. "Yes. Him."

"Why would I want to talk to him?"

Fenris rolled his eyes. "Never mind."

"Aside from dwarves and gossip, have you heard anything about what's next for the Inquisition?" Dorian asked, interrupting them.

"Nope. Just waiting yeah? Like everyone else round here. Think there's something bad in some place named after a lion. Stupid name if you ask me. And there's some Orlesian historian here asking about the first ever Inquisitor or some nonsense, like the end of the world wasn't happening. Nobles and their priorities right?"

"That's odd." Dorian agreed.

A messenger arrived then, interrupting their conversation. "Serah Fenris? Messere Pavus? The Inquisitor would like to see you in the Undercroft."

Dorian arched a brow at the messenger. "The Undercroft?"

"Yes messere."

"Alright. Tell her we're on our way."


	40. Magical Runes

The Inquisitor beamed at them when they arrived in the undercroft where the arcanist and blacksmith worked. Her eyes were bright but wary as she fidgeted beside Dagna. "Oh good you're both here! Excellent."

Dorian raised a brow at her. "My dear lady, you are no good at this at all. Why are you nervous? What's going on?"

The Inquisitor flushed, casting her eyes to the dirt floor. "Yes, right. Well, it's um.. Okay, so you know how bad red lyrium is and dangerous and I don't like putting my people in danger so I had Dagna do some research and she's got something that will do that."

Dorian frowned. "Do what Inquisitor?"

"Protect people from it. I'm sure you've already heard the rumours about the Emprise. I swear Skyhold is worse than a brothel for gossip."

"Alethra Trevelyan. Get on with it already and spit it out." Dorian scolded, his arms crossed over his chest as he fixed her with a harsh glare.

The Inquisitor expelled the breath she'd been holding, throwing her arms skyward in defeat. "Fine, fine. Dagna has created an enchanted rune for every Inquisition member to wear who will be going anywhere near red lyrium alright? It will protect us from exposure, nullifying it's effects."

"Well that's good isn't it? No need for all this fluster."

"They haven't made one for me." Fenris said, his eyes fixed on the dwarf who stood by the Inquisitor's side, eyeing him with brazen curiosity.

"What? Why?" Dorian asked, turning to stare at his lover.

"The markings. They'll interfere with the rune won't they?" He said, addressing Dagna.

The dwarf flushed almost as pink as the Inquisitor. "Yes actually but..."

Alethra cut her off. "But Dagna has an idea about that."

Fenris scowled. "I know what you're getting at."

Dorian frowned, huffing at all of them. "What in bloody blazes are you all so upset about?"

Fenris turned him to stare into his eyes. "The dwarf wants to counteract the lyrium markings in my skin with a rune."

"I got that part. I'm not a complete idiot you know." He snapped.

"She has to see the pattern to do that mage." Fenris sighed.

Dorian paled. "Oh. Kaffas... that means… venhedis, fasta vaas." He added, turning to stare at the dwarf. "You... need to see him naked don't you?"

"If there was another way… " Dagna murmured, shifting from foot to foot.

"Right." Alethra said brightly. "I'm going to let you all work that out. Places to go, people to placate, maybe save, maybe assassinate. Later!" And she was gone out the door before anyone could say a word.

"Typical." Dorian scoffed, turning his attention back to the warrior, a worried look on his face. "Are you all right? Do you want to do this?"

"It's not high on my list of things I wanted to do today. But if it will protect me from red lyrium..."

"Actually I'm hoping it will do more than that." Dagna said cheerily from behind Dorian, drawing their attention. "Your lyrium ghost thing? Well you can't phase through red lyrium. I think it would be very bad if you tried that actually, even by accident, but if I can figure out the pattern, the rune I make will help repel you from red lyrium and anything infected with it."

"Repel?" Dorian repeated. "What do you mean repel?"

"Like if he was phasing across a battlefield and hit too close to a red Templar, he'd just bounce off."

"Bounce off?" Fenris echoed. "Won't that hurt?"

Dagna giggled. "No. It would be like hitting a pillow. You'd bounce off and go around it, like water flows around objects in the way."

"I see." Dorian murmured, returning his gaze to the elf. "Am I to assume you wish to do this now?"

"Um… yes? The Inquisitor wants everyone protected before she has to send anyone to the Emprise. Already got some people too close to some Templars in the Emerald Graves. No one's sick, but they had nightmares for a few days after they got back to Skyhold."

"Do you want me to stay?" Dorian asked Fenris, his voice filled concern.

Fenris took his hand and squeezed, his eyes hooded. "Do you mind?"

"Of course I don't mind." Dorian huffed.

"I have a space set up near the waterfall when you're ready." Dagna said, motioning with her hand. "Better lighting."

Sharing a look with the mage, Fenris pulled Dorian with him into the small, closed off area Dagna had set up. He released the mage's hand and without further hesitation, stripped out of his shirt.

Dorian's breath hitched. He wasn't prepared for this. In all their shared moments, he'd never seen the elf's markings in good lighting, never mind his entire body so naked and vulnerable without his hands on him. He clamped his jaw closed to keep from sighing at the sight of Fenris stripping out of his clothes to stand naked before the dwarf. His eyes met Dorian's and in a rare show of neediness, he stretched out his hand for Dorian to hold it. All carnal thoughts fled at the sight and he grasped Fenris' hand in his, feeling his throat tighten and his mouth go dry. He blinked at the sudden damp in the corners of his eyes and squeezed the elf's hand in what he hoped was a reassuring gesture.

"Ahem." Dagna cleared her throat, her voice soft as though she were trying not to intrude. "Okay, so this won't take long. I just need to draw the pattern."

Fenris broke his gaze a moment to glance at the dwarf, but returned to meeting Dorian's eyes a second later. Dorian kept his eyes fixed on Fenris, his mind noting the pattern of the markings covering the elf from head to toe. That the warrior had suffered so much and survived… Maker, he was so beautiful he found it hard to draw breath. Fenris held Dorian's gaze and felt humbled by the reverence and fondness he saw there. Despite being exposed before his lover and a stranger, he felt safe and protected in Dorian's presence. The reassuring pressure of the mage's hand in his grounded him and held him in a bubble of safety, the likes of which he'd never experienced before.

"Um. I've got it." Dagna said, breaking the strange spell that had fallen over them both. "Is there more uh… on the back?"

Fenris blinked and wordlessly turned so his back was to her, drawing Dorian with him so he was pulled closer. The look in the mage's eyes was filling his chest with a tightness he'd not felt before. Standing exposed in this way before his lover was unsettling, thrilling and … and he felt filled with a sense of life, of belonging, acceptance and... love. He blinked, his hand tightening on Dorian's at the sudden realization and Dorian frowned at him in concern.

"Fenris?"

Loosening his grip, he smiled. "It's nothing. I'm fine." He said. _Better than fine_ , he wanted to whisper but it was not the time for such things.

"Okay that's all I need!" Dagna chirped from behind them, startling the elf. "I'll leave you alone to dress. Thank you Serah Fenris. Master Dorian." He heard her move away but kept his eyes fixed on the mage.

Dorian cleared his throat. "Thank you Dagna." He said, watching the warrior who still hadn't let go of his hand.

Fenris stepped closer and pressed a kiss to his lips. "Thank you Dorian." He said, releasing his hand to dress.

Dorian couldn't think past the sudden rush of tension in his chest. "You're welcome." He said, not understanding.

Fully dressed once more, Fenris returned to him. He took his hand in his and led the confused mage out of the undercroft and outside to the tavern.


	41. Revelations

"I'm not averse to imbibing fine spirits Fenris, but isn't it a little early?" Dorian asked as they settled at a table near the back on the second floor.

"No, it's not. And it's one drink." Fenris said quietly.

"Alright. What are we having?"

"Agreggio Pavali."

Dorian's brow shot up. "They have that? Here? Little pricey isn't it?"

"I have connections." Fenris muttered as the barmaid took his order.

"Be right back Serah Fenris." She said cheerily.

"Connections with whom?"

"Varric. Hawke."

"The dwarf is getting you expensive wine?"

"He owes me."

"Must owe you a lot to have that label shipped all the way from Tevinter."

"He led us to Corypheus the first time and got us trapped in a Warden prison. Then he got us involved in a qunari Tal-Vashoth, Ben-Hasrath plot involving an Orlesian Duke, a giant wyvern and Empress Celene."

"A giant wyvern? Why haven't I heard this story?" Dorian complained.

"Because Hawke threatened him on pain of death if he breathed one word of it. The last thing she needed was her name attached to the death of a Duke after the qunari thing. Though somehow the Seeker still knew about it."

The tavern girl returned and set down two glasses of deep red wine. Fenris snatched them up and passed one to his lover. He clinked their glasses together and took a healthy swallow, rolling the liquid over his tongue to savour the fruity, spicy notes before swallowing.

Dorian sighed happily, a small smile on his lips as he savoured the drink. "I had no idea you had such fine taste in wine."

"I used to pour it for Danarius' guests. He said they found me intimidating."

Dorian grunted. "I didn't need a reminder of that man. Though he was right, you are intimidating. Your beauty is breathtaking. No one can compete with it."

Fenris paused to stare at the mage who was still gazing into his glass with fondness. "Delicious." He murmured.

"Are you talking to me or the wine?" Fenris teased.

"Mmm?" Dorian looked up from his glass. "Oh. Both of course." He said, giving him a wink.

Fenris growled. "You're incorrigible."

"No. I just adore you. Even more now that I know about your wine preferences."

"Your adoration increased because of my taste in wine?"

"How could it not? Fine wines are a passion of mine I haven't been able to indulge in for far too long."

Fenris snorted, a smile in his lips. "I see how it is. You want in on my private reserves."

"I resent the implication I only want you for your taste in wine. I'm not that superficial."

Fenris put his hand to Dorian's cheek and swiped his thumb over his lip to wipe a way a drop of wine. Keeping his eyes locked with Dorian's, he put his thumb to his mouth and licked the drop away.

Dorian sucked in a sharp breath at the sight, his pupils dilating. "What... what are you doing? Are you… teasing me? Here?"

"Mmm."

"It's not going to work. Especially not now I'm drinking wine that tastes like actual wine."

"Not even if I kiss you? Run my tongue over your lip? Trail kisses along your jaw?" Fenris whispered, sliding his chair closer and slipping a hand around the mage's back. His other hand rested on Dorians thigh, not moving, just laid flat and letting the heat of his skin warm the mage's flesh beneath his clothes. He bent his head close, his breath hot on Dorian's neck. "I want you mage. I want to bend you over and take you. Would you like that? Do you object to such a carnal suggestion?"

"Nnno… Maker, what's gotten into you?" He rasped, as Fenris began lightly massaging his thigh making his breath hitch.

"You." Fenris growled, placing a kiss to his neck.

"Stop that."

"Why?"

"Because my breeches are already too tight. If we're doing this I would like some privacy."

"Our room is too far away mage." Fenris reminded him, placing tender kisses along the exposed flesh of Dorian's neck. "The attic."

Dorian flushed, his muscles tensing as he closed his eyes. "There's nothing up there but broken furniture." He protested, his hand tightening it's grip on the wine glass.

"We don't need furniture." Fenris growled. "Finish your wine mage. I cannot wait much longer."

Dorian swallowed and downed the last of his wine as Fenris stood, his hand clasped in his as he dragged him from the chair and led him up the stairs. He knew he looked dazed but it was early yet so there was no one to see.

Fenris let go of his hand as they stepped into the tower filled with broken furniture. He watched as the elf righted a table and shoved it up against one of the tower doors. He did the same to the other door, dragging a bookcase in front of it to wedge it closed. His eyes were dark with lust when he returned to his side, removing Dorian's shawl and draping it over the table.

Without speaking, he stared into Dorian's eyes as he stripped him, dropping his clothes to the floor to stand naked and shivering before him. He pulled him into his arms and kissed him, lips and tongue seeking and devouring and making his pulse jump in his throat. The warrior uttered a guttural growl, as he backed him up to the table.

"Turn around. Bend over." Fenris grunted.

Heart hammering at the lust and desire thick in the elf's voice, Dorian did as he asked, already hard from the warrior's dominant display. He laid his upper body on the table, hands near his head as Fenris caressed a hand down his back. He heard the swish of clothes dropping to the floor and then the elf's bared thighs were pressing against his as he stepped between his legs, spreading his thighs further apart. He moaned at the sensation, his pulse racing as the warrior's body bent over him, covering his back with soft kisses along the base of his neck, his cock brushing lightly against his ass. His hands gripped the edge of the table, the elf's weight pinning him in place and allowing him no way to move.

"Fenris... please.." He begged, unsure what he was asking for when a warm slick teased his entrance making his breath hitch.

"Mine." The warrior whispered as he slipped a finger inside him making Dorian whine with need. "Mine." He whispered again as he added another finger, stretching and preparing him. Dorian strained against the weight on his back, unable to move his hips or his body, desperate to feel more. "Mine." Fenris whispered again as he pressed the head of his cock to Dorian's entrance and surged forward, drawing surprised gasps from them both.

Dorian's muscles tightened, his breathing ragged as he adjusted to the fullness of Fenris being inside him and the heady feel of being filled. The elf's cock throbbed inside his passage, his own twitching beneath him in response, hard and leaking pre-cum. After a moment, Fenris began to move, his hands on Dorian's hips to steady him. The sound of flesh smacking flesh filled the quiet space, punctuated by soft grunts and moans as the warrior set his pace, chasing his release and filling Dorian with blinding need and pleasure.

Dorian twitched, his cock throbbing as the elf pounded into him, his body and mind flooding with the pleasure the elf was drawing from his body. His pace slowing, Fenris covered his body with his own, his hands linking with his as he pressed kisses to his neck and shoulders. "Mine." He whispered, one hand reaching beneath him to grasp Dorian's aching hardness, stroking in time with his thrusts. "Come for me, my mage." He whispered, trailing kisses along Dorian's shoulder.

Dorian could feel the pressure building in his groin, unable to move as Fenris continued stroking him, pinning him flush with the table. The need to come was overwhelming as he tried to thrust into the warrior's hand. "Maker... Fenris... please, I can't..." He whispered brokenly.

The elf increased his pace, leaning up and away to gain more leverage, drawing Dorian up with him so he could see the mage's arousal and better grip his hard length. "Come for me mage." He whispered again, his voice heavy with lust.

Dorian could no longer think coherent thoughts as his orgasm ripped through him. His seed spurting streams of fluid before him as Fenris continued thrusting inside him. Muscles contracting, the elf gave a grunt, legs spasming as he filled the mage with his release, one arm tight across Dorian's abdomen, crushing him to his chest. Spent, he pushed Dorian gently back down to the table, chest heaving as his breathing returned to normal. "Mine." He whispered again, placing a kiss to Dorian's neck as he slipped from his body.

"Wait here love." He said softly, making Dorian's eyes snap open. "I'll find something to clean us up with."

Dorian's heart thudded in his chest while Fenris moved around the room behind him. Had Fenris just called him… love? Fenris returned and a soft cloth was passed over his thighs and buttocks as the elf cleaned him up. Dorian was still overcome with what Fenris had called him and didn't notice at first when the warrior stopped moving.

"Dorian? Mage?" He called, a note of concern on his voice. "Are you all right?"

He asked, his hand gentle on his lover's back as Dorian pushed himself up from the table. "I didn't hurt you did I?"

Dorian turned, shaking his head at the worried look in his lover's eyes and drew him into his arms, kissing him soundly. "No. You didn't hurt me. That was wonderful." He said, taking his clothes from the elf's outstretched hand and dressing.

Fenris frowned at him and continued pulling on his own clothes. He wasn't reassured by the kiss, Dorian's voice had been strained and his eyes looked pinched. He busied himself by moving the broken furniture away from the doors while Dorian dressed, returning to his side with the mage's shawl clutched in his hands.

"You're not convincing me." He said, handing over the shawl. "What's wrong?"

Dorian passed a tired hand over his face, expelling his breath in a loud whoosh of sound. "It's nothing. You probably don't even remember saying it."

"Saying what?"

Dorian's eyes were guarded as he met Fenris stare. "You… called me love a moment ago."

Fenris blushed and looked away. "Oh."

"Exactly." The mage huffed, his voice hard and falsely cheerful. "As I expected. Heat of the moment thing. Completely understandable. Let's get some lunch shall we? That wine seems to have gone straight to my head, it's been too long." He continued, moving to the attic door of the tavern.

Fenris gave a frustated growl and moved to block Dorian's fleeing form. He hadn't planned on saying what he had. He'd only just realized the depth of his feelings for the mage when they'd been with Dagna. He'd wanted to wait, to share what he felt in a more romantic setting, but that was no longer an option.

"It was not a heat of the moment thing." He said, his hand to Dorian's cheek, forcing the mage to meet his eyes. "I meant what I said Dorian. I wanted to do this... elsewhere, but I love you. At least, I believe I do. I have no experience with… with what lies between us, but I can't imagine having anyone else at my side. I love you and… and I want us to be together for… well, for as long as you want to be with me. I hope that's a very long time."

Dorian smiled, his chest tight, his mouth dry as his hand covered the elf's own as it lay against his cheek. "Amatus." He whispered, heart thudding loud in his chest. Fenris' eyes were bright as he placed a needy kiss to Dorian's lips, his other hand slipping around the mage's waist to hold him flush against his chest.

"Amatus?" Fenris whispered against the mage's lips. "Does that mean?"

Dorian sighed. "Yes, kaffas. Maker help us both amatus. I love you Fenris."

Fenris chuckled, his chest tight. "Kaffas is right." He said, stepping away and taking hold of Dorian's hand. "Come, my mage. I think we need more wine."


	42. Wyverns and Letters

"We've got time to kill now." Dorian said as they stepped back inside the tavern. "I want to hear this wyvern story."

Fenris rolled his eyes. "It's not that good a story."

"You're joking. What's not interesting about wild animals, Qunari and nobles?"

"Everything." Fenris retorted as they returned to their table. "The dwarf tells it better. Ask him. I didn't even want to go. Hawke may have listened to me once we knew the truth, but she was still implicated in Duke Prosper's death."

"Implicated?" Dorian's lip twitched. "Or responsible?"

Fenris chuckled. "Depends who you ask, though Varric told Cassandra what he knew. I've no idea how honest he was."

"Oh come on Fenris. You at least have to tell me how it started." Dorian pleaded.

"Varric got a message for Hawke to meet someone in Hightown after dark. As was typical, we were ambushed and then we met Tallis."

"Tallis?"

"Yes."

"But that's the qunari word for…"

"Yes, I know. But I didn't at the time, I'd never heard it before."

"And how did she convince Hawke to help her?"

"Lies of course." Fenris snorted. "Said she wanted help stealing a jewel."

"A jewel."

Fenris smiled at him. "Yeah. She called it the Heart of the Many."

Dorian almost choked on his wine at that. "Let me guess, you didn't know that phrase either?"

"No. Not until after the Duke put both Hawke and Tallis in his dungeon."

"And after Hawke learned the truth?"

Fenris smiled again, his eyes lit with pride. "I didn't know what Hawke was thinking then. People were always lying to her about something and yet she would still help them if she agreed with their reasons."

"But not this time?"

"No. We left Tallis in the caves after we escaped the dungeon. But in our attempt to leave the grounds we ended up back with Tallis and the Duke who was right then meeting with the Tal-Vashoth. Tallis was already there."

Dorian smiled. "Your friend Hawke seems to find trouble no matter where she goes."

"She does. There was a battle of course. We fought the qunari, the Duke's guards and his pet wyvern. We won when Hawke tricked the wyvern into coming too close to the edge of the clearing. It fell and so did the Duke."

"And Tallis?"

Fenris shrugged. "She got what she came for, gave Hawke a jewel for getting her involved and we returned to Kirkwall."

"Hawke didn't kill her then."

"No, but I think she wanted to. She was angry for a long time after that but Hawke was never one to kill in cold blood."

Dorian sighed. "You had a very interesting life in Kirkwall Fenris. Do you ever miss it?"

"Yes and no." The warrior shrugged. "It was nice keeping the streets safe but there was always a problem somewhere. And some of the things Hawke got tangled up in were very dangerous. But having several friends in one place, that I do miss."

Dorian was silent a while. "It was your first home wasn't it? Would you ever want to go back?"

Fenris looked at him then, his face unreadable. "What is this about Dorian?"

Dorian dropped his eyes to the glass of wine in his hands. "Nothing. Just making an observation."

"Dorian." Fenris growled. "Look at me."

Heaving a sigh, Dorian met the elf's pale emerald eyes. "I've been thinking about... after."

"After?"

"After Corypheus. If we win, if we survive."

"Are you talking about the Inquisition or something else?"

"You had a home in Kirkwall Fenris. When this is all over do you want to go back?"

Fenris frowned harder. "Is this about your father?"

Dorian looked away, his lip curling. "No. Of course not."

"It is." Fenris argued. "This is about your leaving the Imperium. Are you trying to tell me you want to go back there?"

"No." Dorian shook his head. "I can't go back Fenris, you know that."

The warrior stared at him a moment longer. "I'm not sure what you're saying amatus. Do you think I won't be with you after the Inquisition defeats Corypheus?" Fenris could see a muscle in Dorian's jaw clench and relax but he didn't answer. "Dorian?"

"I did mention I wasn't very good at this." He sighed. "I don't have a home to go back to. I left everything behind, I... gave it all up when I left the Imperium."

Fenris slid his hand over Dorian's where it rested on the table. "Mage. I don't care about any of that. And you don't have nothing, you have me. As long as we're together, we'll find somewhere to call home. Is this why you were asking about Kirkwall?"

Dorian sighed and covered the elf's hand with his free one. "Yes. Your story about Tallis reminded me of my life before the Inquisition."

"A life in which you weren't happy."

Dorian met his eyes then. "Not entirely, no."

"What do you mean, not entirely?"

"Oh don't misunderstand. Most of it was intolerable and... exhausting. Constantly pretending I didn't hate the dark side of Tevinter, always prepared for a threat or insult whenever I went out. Putting on the mask, not acknowledging how utterly out of place I was with my peers and not suitably engaged or otherwise attached to my perfect match."

He took another long swallow of wine and dropped his gaze. "But I miss my studies, magical theory, the conversations I used to have with Alexius. That's gone now. The mages here... it's not the same. They're so wrapped up in the Chantry and the Templars and what will happen to them after. My attempts at academic discussions with them are met with bored looks and in some of cases, outright contempt and condemnation."

"You're homesick."

"Maybe a little." Dorian admitted quietly. "It makes me sad I can never go back, that's all. I wasn't expecting to miss it as much as I do."

"Never?"

Dorian looked at him sharply, his brow pulling down in confusion. "Of course never. First of all, I'm not going anywhere without you. Second, if I went back there's no telling how far my father would go to ensure an heir."

"And if your safety was assured?"

"Why are you even asking me this? You know as well as I do that no one can ensure my safety. It's Tevinter for Maker's sake."

Fenris stared into his glass, catching a reflection of his eye in the wine. He'd had a thought and wanted to share it with his mage, but now that he'd said it aloud he wasn't sure he should continue.

"Fenris." Dorian prodded. "Tell me what you're thinking."

"What if you were to be made an Ambassador for the Inquisition? Inquisitor Trevelyan could provide you with protection."

Dorian gaped at him, his eyes hard. "Are you trying to get me killed? Or get rid of me? You want to end things between us? I don't understand."

"I'm not doing any of those things. And I've no intention of letting you go back alone. I would be with you."

Dorian's heart was pounding, his palms had gone damp and he'd tightened his hold on his wine glass.  "No. Absolutely not."

Fenris glared at him. "Why?"

"I sincerely hope you're joking."

"I'm not joking Dorian. I mean it."

"No. No, I will not have you go back there for any reason amatus. You may have legal status as a citizen now, but the Magisterium and everyone else would see you as nothing more than a slave. And I don't doubt they'd still treat you like one too. How can you even suggest such a thing?"

"I suggest it because you have good ideas for change. I've heard you discussing it with the Inquisitor."

"No Fenris." Dorian shook his head. "Just... no. I don't want to talk about this anymore."

"Dorian..."

"Am I interrupting something?"

Fenris glared at Cullen who was standing by their table looking uncertain as he took in Dorain's tense expression.

"Not at all Commander." Dorian smiled up at him. "Have a seat and join us. What can we do for you?"

"Thank you Dorian, but I can't. I only came to deliver a message." He said, handing him an envelope.

Dorian frowned. "You're delivering letters now? I thought that was Leliana's department."

"Normally it is, but this came from one of my recruits. He joined us from the Free Marches and says he received it from a mage just before his boat left the docks in Kirkwall."

"Who is this recruit?" Fenris demanded, his shoulders suddenly tense.

Cullen dropped his gaze, looking embarrassed. "Unfortunately I can't give you that information. He's dead."

"What?" Fenris gasped.

"It was an accident. We were on our way back from the Emerald Graves when we were attacked by a family of bears. He was killed when the largest of them fell, crushing him to death."

"Maker's breath." Dorian exclaimed. "That's... unfortunate."

Cullen nodded. "Truly. I had planned to question him further once we reached Skyhold but..."

"I see." Dorian grimaced. "Well thank you Cullen. I'll let you know if this is something we need to be concerned about."

"Of course. I'll be in my office if you need me." Cullen said, giving a slight bow and excusing himself.

"A mage?" Fenris asked after Cullen left.

"I can't imagine who would be writing me here." Dorian agreed.

"So read it already."

Dorian frowned at the envelope he held and broke the wax seal.

"Fenris!" An excited female voice cried, startling them both.

They turned to see Dagna standing there, beaming at them with a pleased expression on her face. "Sorry to interrupt but I need you to come with me to the Undercroft. I've made a rune, but I need you to help me test it."

"Test it?" Dorian repeated. "You're not talking about red lyrium testing are you?"

Dagna blushed and looked away. "Just a small piece. It's not dangerous, not really."

"All red lyrium is dangerous Dagna." Dorian argued.

"Well that's a little true. My experiment isn't dangerous though. You won't be in any danger Serah Fenris. Really. But I do need you to come now."

Fenris groaned and got to his feet, giving Dorian a hard look. "Do not consider keeping that letter to yourself amatus. I want to see it later."

"You don't trust me?" Dorian grumbled.

Fenris leaned down to Dorian's ear. "I trust you love. But I have a bad feeling about whoever sent this letter." He whispered.

Dorian relaxed his shoulders. "That makes two of us amatus."

Fenris smiled and kissed him. "I'll come find you when I've finished with Dagna."

"If nothing else demands my attention, I'll be in my quarters."

Fenris nodded and followed Dagna out of the tavern. Dorian watched him go, breathing a sigh of relief as the warrior left the tavern. He had no intention of reading the mystery letter in front of an audience. There were few who would write him here, even less who would use a recruit to have such a letter delivered. He didn't like it and couldn't suppress the nervous feeling in his gut as he left the tavern and headed to his quarters.


	43. Echoes from the Past

Dorian busied himself lighting a fire and several candles when he reached his quarters. He then started shelving books and clearing away a empty bottles and some robes, the letter in his pocket making a crinkling sound every time he moved, mocking him for his fear. With the room tidied there was nothing left to distract him from the letter. He knew he was only delaying the inevitable, but he couldn't help it. The last time he'd received a letter at Skyhold under mysterious circumstances, was when his father had tricked him into going to Redcliff.

Which was why he snagged a bottle of top shelf red wine and a glass before settling into his chair by the fire. He popped the cork with a bit of finely tuned force magic, catching it in a tiny barrier before it could fly across the room. He smiled at his own magical display, indulging in petty parlour tricks in an attempt to distract himself from the letter still stuffed in his pocket.

With a full glass in hand, he drank deeply and pulled the letter from his pocket. Heaving a sigh, he unfolded the worn parchment which showed wear from how far it had travelled. A fine tremor was running through his hand, which he forced to still as he smoothed out the edges and began to read.

 

_"Lord Pavus, or is it just Dorian now? The rumours surrounding your disappearance were numerous when they first started in the Imperium. Frankly I was shocked when the whispers about your treachery and betrayal began. At first I didn't believe any of it and then it hit me. It made perfect sense._

_You, the most powerful up and coming Altus in a generation, motivated not by loyalty to your countrymen, but by some ridiculous romantic notions about love and freedom. Of course I then had to inform the Magisterium of your proclivities. Too many were unconvinced until I laid it out for them. Your father was questioned, as was to be expected and the truth was learned. Not by everyone of course. Only those who needed to know these things, you understand._

_You've been a very bad man Dorian. The Venatori want your head on a platter and not just for what happened in Redcliff. You see, they also know about your research on Corypheus and suspect your connection to Tilani. Such a shame you've fallen so far from the ideal. Anyway, I though it a courteous thing to do to let you know how things are unfolding here in the Imperium. If all goes well I'm sure we'll be seeing you sooner rather than later. Can't say you'll find the experience enjoyable._

_R._

_P.S. Is it true you're bedding a former prized elven slave? For shame Pavus. Now who's the hypocrite?"_

 

Dorian's hand trembled, his heart beating fast as his hand clutched the parchment, wanting to destroy the vile words written there. Instead, he let it fall to the floor and leaned back in his chair, gulping several swallows of wine as he did. There was only one person who would have sent such a letter, one person who he'd once believed understood him and whom he trusted. A man who wouldn't betray him, but had just admitted that he had.

\----xxx----

It took much longer than Dagna had assured him it would take to run her tests so it was dark by the time he emerged from the undercroft. There was no sign of Dorian in the grand hall and Varric hadn't seem him when he stopped at the dwarf's table to ask. Knowing his amatus, he was fairly confident the mage hadn't bothered to remember to eat anything so he took a detour to the kitchens to fetch something for them both. Laden with some bread and two bowls of stew, he headed to Dorian's quarters, anxious to know what had been in the letter the mage had received.

Dorian didn't answer when he knocked at the door with his foot, necessary with his hands full of food and wary of spilling it. Cursing, he set the food down and opened the door, noting the lit fire and not much else as he crossed the threshold. Dorian was asleep in the chair, an empty bottle of wine on the table as he snored quietly in the cozy spot by the fire.

He set the food down on a small table and picked up the letter Dorian had let fall to the floor. Settling in the chair opposite, he began to read, muttering under his breath about pretentious language when he struggled to make sense of what was written there. An icy chill ran down his spine, followed by anger at the insults and accusations written there. He must have been cursing aloud for when he looked up, Dorian was watching him through half-lidded eyes.

"I see you've read my letter." He said, stretching his arms above his head and straightening in his chair. "Fascinating reading wouldn't you say?"

"I would not." Fenris retorted. "Who is this R?"

Dorian tipped the wine bottle to his glass, making a face and a disgusted noise when nothing came out. "If my guess is correct it's a ladder climbing, socially adept, backstabbing laetan who I used to call a friend."

"That's not an answer amatus." He growled. "I don't suppose you remembered to eat anything while I was gone."

"I did not. I was a little preoccupied wondering who in their right mind would be writing me a letter here and worrying about this red lyrium test Dagna needed you for."

"As I expected. Eat amatus." Fenris said, handing him a bowl. "We can talk after."

"Fine, alright.”

Dorian finished first, rising to stoke the fire and fetch another bottle of wine and more glasses. When he returned to his chair, he handed Fenris a glass, his thoughts more settled than when he'd first read the letter.

"So before you start, how did Dagna's test go?"

"They were... interesting." Fenris replied, sipping his brandy. "She is unlike any dwarf I've met before. It's odd to see how well she works with enchantment and arcane knowledge. I imagine she shocked many of the Circle mages with her research on lyrium."

"So will these runes she's working on actually work? Will they protect you from red lyrium?"

"The test she ran seemed to indicate that yes. She's based some of her findings on Samson's armour and the lyrium in my skin. I don't pretend to understand it all, but her test proved I will not be able to get close to any red lyrium. The rune she's crafted makes it impossible."

"So it's ready then?" Dorian added, he brow rising in question.

"Not yet, no. She still needs to make allowances for my phasing ability and the proper placement in my armour. It cannot be a simple amulet and needs to be embedded in my clothes. Now enough stalling amatus, who wrote this letter?"

Dorian sighed and dropped his gaze to the wine in his hand. "He's someone I knew a long time ago. We... we were close once and then I never saw him again."

"His name?"

"Rilienis."

"Close how?" Fenris pressed, noting how Dorian's hands were clenching around his glass.

"We were intimate amatus. I believed I'd finally found someone who... shared my beliefs about relations between men. But I was wrong. For him it was only a game, a bit of fun and.... Well let's just say it ended badly."

"He betrayed you."

Dorian nodded. "Yes. You'd think I'd have known better by then, but he made promises. Told me things I suppose I made obvious I wanted to hear. Not sure why I was so surprised when he ended our affair. Too busy ignoring reality I guess."

"Users are very good at getting what they want from someone my mage. You did nothing wrong. What did he mean about being a hypocrite?"

"Just what you expect. I told him I would never use a slave to fulfill my needs. He thought it naive of me at the time, though he agreed it wasn't the same with someone who had no choice. I believed it meant he stopped after we started seeing each other. It didn't, but I thought it did. It's how I found out how he really felt about our... arrangement. I... caught him taking his pleasure from a slave in his parent's stable. Asked me to join him in his fun and I... ran away."

Fenris rose and settled at Dorian's feet, his hands on Dorian's knees. "You deserved better amatus."

"I was foolish to think he ever cared for me. You must think I'm terribly gullible."

Fenris chuckled and put a hand to the mage's cheek, running his thumb over Dorian's lip. "No. I think you have a beautiful heart which deserves to be loved and cherished. They did not appreciate the gift your love is but I'm glad for it, because I do."

Dorian sat forward in his chair to welcome the kiss Fenris pressed to his lips. "I don't know what I did to deserve you but I am very grateful to have found you."

"As am I. Now, as much as I want to continue kissing you, what did this Rilienis mean when he said he'd see you soon?"

Dorian tensed under the warrior's hands and sat back in his chair. "Well I imagine the Venatori intend to capture me. Drag me somewhere private and exact revenge for my supposed crimes against the Imperium."

"That's not funny Dorian."

Dorian made a face. "I'm not saying it is."

"We need to inform the Inquisitor and her advisors. The Venatori are not to be underestimated."

"Well of course we'll tell them. Are you implying I was going to keep this a secret?"

"No, but you don't seem very concerned about it."

"Why should I be?" Dorian snapped. "My life has been in danger since I left the Imperium to stop Alexius. It was only a matter of time before my deluded countrymen discovered what I did."

Fenris stood, looking at the mage in confusion. "So the entire bottle of wine you drank has nothing to do with the Venatori's threat?"

Dorian stood and crossed to the fire, turning his back on his lover. "Not really, no. I'm not saying I'm not worried, because I am. I suspected they might know what I did, but now I know for certain. Which is not comforting."

"You're upset about who wrote to tell you this, aren't you?"

Dorian sighed, closing his eyes on the memories which sprang to mind. "Yes. We didn't part as friends but I never imagined he'd betray me like this. Nor did it ever occur to me he would choose to side with a cult like the Venatori."

"I doubt he was very forthcoming in tipping his hand when you knew him."

Dorian laughed bitterly. "Platitudes, promises and sweet lies were Rileinis' preferred tactics. He was very good at it. Had me thoroughly convinced he loved me and shared my views on both how the Magisterium needed to change and how slavery made us weak."

Fenris crossed to his lover, taking up a position right beside him. "You shared your views on slavery?"

Dorian snorted and wouldn't meet his eyes. "Don't start looking at me like I'm some kind of altruistic, selfless man Fenris. My thoughts on the matter may have been unpopular in Tevinter, but they were not earth shattering in any way. My refusal to purchase a body slave or take a household slave to my bed didn't extend to brothels. I... deluded myself into believing those... people were there because they chose to be there. How naive is that? I thought myself better than those who I knew attended slave auctions, looking for their perfect specimen. Most chose men, not because they enjoyed them but because they presented less trouble than a female. No risk of embarrassing accidents you see."

"I'm well aware of the practice. It is still more than the majority acknowledge."

"Please stop making excuses for me."

"That's not what I'm doing. You're too hard on yourself Dorian. I don't care that you didn't understand then, what's important is that you came to care more than most ever will. It matters amatus."

"I don't know why you put up with me. And I know I need to stop saying that, it's just surprising to hear someone praising me for things I've only ever be mocked and derided for."

Fenris sighed and gathered Dorian into his arms. "At some point you will have to start believing in your finer qualities amatus. You are a better man than you think, better even than you pretend with all your posturing."

"Maybe." Dorian nodded, resting his chin on the warrior's shoulder. "How did you get past what you saw as flaws Fenris? I imagine you felt you had a few when you first reached Kirkwall."

Fenris snorted. "With copious amounts of expensive wine, broken bottles and arguments with every one of Hawke's friends. I don't recommend it as a learning mechanism."

"Hawke's friends?" Dorian frowned, stepping out of Fenris' embrace. "Did you not consider them your friends as well?"

"Not all of them, no. I did consider Varric and Aveline friends, though the Guard-Captain made it difficult to know she wouldn't betray me to her city laws. Isabella... well, I liked drinking with her and she was good at annoying pretty much everyone."

"I'm well aware of your feelings for Anders and I imagine you weren't fond of Merrill either."

Fenris scowled. "Merrill was naive. It didn't help she was also a blood mage and a Dalish. Her superior attitude and ignorance was a constant source of irritation and I wasn't the only one who felt that way."

"Mmm. It sounds like that might have changed."

Fenris nodded as he started removing his armour and leathers to change into something more comfortable. "She... grew on me. But not until after her ignorance got her keeper killed and the Chantry was destroyed. She stayed in Kirkwall to help the city elves. It... impressed me."

"She sounds unique amatus."

Fenris laughed. "On that we can agree."

"I hate to ask, but what about Anders?"

"Anders made so many poor choices before we met there was no chance we would ever be friends. Even after Justice was separated from him, he still refused to accept what his choices led to."

Dorian nodded. "Unfortunate but not terribly surprising."

Dressed only in loose-fitting breeches, Fenris climbed into bed and beckoned to him. "Come, my mage. We should get some sleep. Dagna said the rune she's crafting will be complete by tomorrow. I doubt the Inquisitor will delay going to the Emprise once the enchantments are finished. "And we still need to speak to her about your letter."

Dorian groaned and began working at the buckles and stays holding his armour in place. "I didn't need a reminder of either of those things."

"I'm sure you didn't, but you still need to rest."

Dorian huffed as he removed the last of his clothes and changed into an expensive pair of royal blue silk sleep pants. He circled the room, dousing candles before crawling into bed and Fenris' waiting arms. As he settled against the pillows, Fenris pulled him close, one arm circling his waist, the warrior's chest pressed to his back and he let out a sigh of contentment he couldn't suppress.

The elf chuckled, his breath whispering across the back of Dorian's neck. "I love the sounds you make mage." He said, pressing a kiss to Dorian's shoulder.

"And I love how you make me feel safe Fenris." Dorian whispered back, threading his fingers through the elf's and squeezing lightly.

"Good to know." Fenris sighed, content. "Sleep my mage. I'll continue to keep you safe."


	44. Protected

"Great news Serah Fenris!" Dagna beamed up at him the following morning after breakfast. "I completed the enchantment and it can be fused into your armour in under an hour. You won't need to carry anything or worry about losing it."

"You need my armour then?"

"Just for an hour." She nodded.

"I will go fetch it."

"Excellent! I'll be here finishing up my other work while I wait."

Fenris shook his head at the dwarf's energy and enthusiasm and headed to his quarters. He had just enough time to run his armour back to Dagna before he was expected in the War Room.

\----xxx----

Dorian paced the floor of the War Room waiting for the Inquisitor, Cullen and Fenris to arrive so they could get this meeting over with.

"Dorian. If you pace that wall again I'm going to make you stop." Cassandra growled, her brow furrowing in annoyance.

"I wouldn't have to pace if Commander Cullen was more punctual." Dorian snapped, his nerves frayed. He understood having to inform the Inquisition, but the nature of the letter and the sender's identity were things he was not in a hurry to share. He just wanted this meeting over with so he could go back to pretending he wasn't in danger of being kidnapped. It had been a possibility since he left home, but sharing it with these people...

Fenris entered, ending his inner dialogue and on seeing Dorian's state, crossed to him and linked his hand in his. "It will be all right amatus." He whispered, low enough that only Dorian could hear him.

Alethra entered then, a smile tugging at her lips when she spotted Fenris' proximity to Dorian. "I'm told you received a threatening letter of suspicious origins Dorian." She said, crossing the room to the other side of the table.

"Yes, that's true." Dorian nodded, tensing.

She frowned, tapping her fingers impatiently on the table while they waited on Cullen who entered shortly after. "Good. We're all here. So tell us what's in this letter Dorian and who do you think sent it?"

Dorian took a deep breath, releasing his grip on Fenris and read the letter aloud, omitting the bits about his person and character.

"This should not be taken lightly." Leliana said when Dorian finished. "What can you tell us about this Rilienis?"

"Not much I'm afraid. He used to be a fine instructor at the Circle of Magi and his theories were extraordinary. When I left the Imperium he was still a fine instructor and his expertise on Fade research was invaluable. He was set to marry the same year I left the college. Aside from that I know nothing about him. If he hadn't written to me I would have never have suspected he would throw in his lot with the Venatori."

"You're right. It's not much to go on." Alethra agreed. "Still, they've threatened an ally and more importantly, a friend. I want all the people here at Skyhold checked out. If we have spies among us I want to know about it."

"Surely they can't have infiltrated our forces Inquisitor." Cullen protested.

"I do not want to take chances with this Commander. We're all well aware of what the Venatori are capable of."

"I will put my people on it immediately Inquisitor." Leliana agreed.

"While you're at it, have Sera and Varric come speak to me."

"Of course Inquisitor." Leliana said. "If you'll excuse me."

"Josephine, Cassandra if you both could remain vigilant on this as well?"

"We will Your Worship."

"Thank you. I'd like a private word with Dorian and Fenris."

The two women nodded and left and Alethra turned to Dorian. "Alright, what did you leave out?"

Fenris snorted, drawing a scowl from Dorian as he met his amatus' eyes over his shoulder. "I left nothing out Alethra. Whatever are you talking about?"

The Inquisitor expelled a loud breath, quirking an eyebrow at him. "Come on Dorian. I know you left something out."

"Ugh. Fine, but I'm not reading it to you. Here," he said, handing her the letter. "Read it yourself."

"Nug-licking bastard." The Inquisitor swore when she finished. "Are all mages in the Imperium like this or did they have to take lessons on how to behave like royal shits?"

Fenris laughed. "Personally, I think many are born like that."

Dorian huffed again and shrugged. "He's not wrong. I sometimes think the same thing."

"All humour aside, I hope you aren't going to ignore this."

"Even if I wanted to, Fenris won't let me."

"Good. At least one of you is taking this seriously."

"I never said I wasn't."

Alethra rolled her eyes. "Don't downplay this Dorian, you're important to me and many others here. I don't want anything to happen to you."

"Yes, fine. I understand and I appreciate your concern. I promise I won't take any unnecessary risks."

"I certainly hope you mean that." She said, turning to Fenris. "Dagna has informed me her enchantments are finished. Her tests were successful then?"

"She's enchanting my armour as we speak." He nodded.

"Good. Then we'll be heading to the Emprise tomorrow. Pack for cold weather, I'm sure you've already heard about the river that froze overnight."

Dorian groaned. "Kaffas. We heard, but I was hoping it was only a rumour."

Alethra giggled. "Sorry Dorian but it's true."

"Come on mage, we should start packing now."

 


	45. High Dragons

"I couldn't be more cold if I was encased in ice." Dorian grumbled where he sat shivering by the fire.

Fenris draped a blanket over his shoulders and joined him, wrapping his free arm around his lover's waist. "Is this better?" He asked as Dorian put an arm about his own waist and pulled him closer.

"Much better amatus." Dorian sighed happily. "Though I may never wish to move from this spot again. What about you? How are your boots working for you?"

"It is... odd to cover my feet, but they are quite warm given how thin they are."

"I had Dagna make them especially for you Fenris." The Inquisitor said from the other side of the fire. "A lot of free elves find it hard to adjust to footwear so I had her come up with a design that makes it a little easier."

"I appreciate your efforts Inquisitor. They are surprisingly comfortable."

"Well good." She smiled. "Glad to hear it."

"I hate to interrupt." Cassandra said, taking a seat near the Inquisitor. "But what are we planning to do about the dragons?"

Alethra groaned, fixing Cassandra with one of her more intimidating glares. "I did not need a reminder of that, but we will have to deal with them. I'll send for Bull and Blackwall and Vivienne. Between us all it shouldn't take more than a day or two."

"After all these red Templars, we're taking out dragons next?" Dorian exclaimed. "Haven't we had enough excitement this week?"

Cassandra glared at him. "We have no choice Dorian. We cannot leave them to destroy the village and we need the roads cleared to increase our trade routes."

Dorian sighed. "I know they need to be dealt with, but we're talking about three High Dragons here, not a walk in the park."

"Actually I'm sending you and Fenris to the Forbidden Oasis with Cullen and Varric." Alethra interrupted. "Scout Harding has had sightings of Venatori in the area and if it's true, I want them taken care of as soon as possible."

"Not that I'm pleased to be leaving this frozen wasteland, but won't you need help with the dragons? I know I was complaining a moment ago, but there are three of them after all."

Alethra chuckled. "Don't worry about it Dorian. Bull and Blackwall are good at taking down dragons and you and Fenris know more about the Venatori than anyone else here. Besides, if they pose a threat to you I want them out of the picture sooner rather than later, which is also why Cullen will be assisting you."

Fenris had stiffened at the mention of Venatori and now fixed his gaze on the Inquisitor. "Is there a plan in place if they attempt to get to Dorian?"

The Inquisitor nodded. "There is and if either of you recognize anyone or their voices, I want you to tell Cullen immediately. He might not be taking lyrium now, but he's your best defense against Venatori mages."

"I promise we'll be careful Inquisitor." Dorian said, getting to his feet. "I have no desire to fall into their hands or be kidnapped by anyone."

"We will be cautious Inquisitor." Fenris agreed, joining Dorian. "If you'll excuse us, I think we both wish to get some sleep."

Alethra smiled. "Of course. Goodnight."

"Goodnight my dear." Dorian said, following Fenris to their tent. "Cassandra."

"Dorian. Fenris." The Seeker nodded turning her attention to the Inquisitor. "Are you certain it is wise to let them do this alone?"

"They won't be alone. Cullen and Varric will be there."

"I suppose, though I cannot shake the feeling of unease I feel."

"Which is why they need to go. I don't like this threat Dorian received and I want the Venatori dealt with."

"Then I hope you're making the right decision. There's no telling how badly things could go wrong if the Venatori succeed in capturing him."

"Please don't remind me Cassandra, I have enough trouble sleeping as it is."

"You're right, I'm sorry. I shall disturb you no more with this. Goodnight Inquisitor."

"Goodnight Cassandra."

  


 


	46. Winding Paths

"From the frozen wastes to the perpetually sun-baked, sand-filled land of nothing as far as the eye can see." Dorian observed, his voice carrying over the wind.

"I'm certain you couldn't be more sarcastic if you tried Dorian." Cullen retorted, his lip quirking up in a smile.

"And what pray tell, did you do to earn the illustrious task of joining us in this desolate wasteland Commander?" Dorian asked, his eyebrow rising in curiosity.

"Honestly? I'm here to ensure your safety Lord Pavus."

Dorian blushed and began fidgeting with his collar.

Fenris laughed, watching Dorian fluster at Cullen's remark and the Commander turn a darker shade of pink as he realized what he'd just said out loud.

"You know elf, these two are more entertaining than the landscape. We might have to request they come on more missions together." Varric grinned.

"Oh, ha ha." Dorian snorted. "Yes, just because neither of you are the current centre of attention, by all means enjoy our embarrassment."

"Oi! You four gonna stand around gawking at the same view all day or are we gonna go look for these stupid ass-backwards mages or what?"

All four turned to look at Sera who was perched on a rock, cleaning her fingernails with an arrow. They each exchanged a look of amused annoyance and moved to join her, their earlier banter dropped for the moment as none wanted to get the elf woman started so soon after their arrival.

"I suppose our young friend has a point." Cullen conceded, breaking the silence. "Which direction should we head in first?"

"Are you asking me?" Dorian asked, frowning at the Commander who was staring at him expectantly.

"Well, you are the expert on these Venatori are you not?"

"I am not an expert on crazed fanatics Cullen. Just because they happen to be mages from Tevinter does not make me an expert on them. If all it took was someone from the same country, you could just as easily ask Fenris, or Krem for that matter."

Cullen blushed again, his mouth opening as though to protest anything he might have implied when Fenris cut him off.

"Ignore him Cullen. He tends to forget himself when he's put on the spot like that." Fenris said, moving to his lover's side. "Amatus, you know why he's asking, so stop protesting and answer the man."

Dorian huffed at him. "Very well. From the look of this oasis, there seems to be more caves and paths cut through the area than completely necessary. I don't think that's an accident nor would it be wise for us to split up. The rifts here are closed but that just means it's easier for the Venatori to go unnoticed."

Fenris arched a brow at him, wanting to prevent another round of pointless question and answer sessions between Cullen and Dorian.

"As to a direction, I think we should head to that cave to the left of our forward camp. I suspect there are more like that further up that slope."

Cullen nodded and started walking, Varric and Sera falling in behind him while Dorian and Fenris brought up the rear.

"I meant what I said Sera!" Dorian shouted as the elven girl slipped ahead of Cullen. "No wandering off by yourself!"

Sera turned and made a rude gesture with her hands, but fell back beside Varric once more, kicking up sand as she walked.

"Are you all right?" Fenris asked, slipping his hand into Dorian's as they walked.

Dorian sighed. "Not really. I'm worried amatus. I feel exposed out here and I don't like that you're here. They know about you and I'm afraid they might try to use that against me."

"Which is why I'm not letting you out of my sight and why Cullen is here. He might be reserved and in control most days, but he is a formidable and capable ally and very good at protecting people."

"I can't believe you let the other thing I said slide amatus." Dorian whispered. "I didn't mean I don't want you here."

Fenris gave his hand a squeeze. "I know you didn't. I also know you wouldn't have said it if you weren't also very worried about this. I promise I won't let anything happen to you Dorian."

Dorian squeezed back. "Just so long as you promise to be careful. I don't want anything happening to you either. Maker, I'm beginning to think this was a mistake coming here. I don't like feeling like bait."

"The sooner these Venatori are dealt with, the sooner we can both sleep easier love. And it's better to deal with them here than if they were to try for you in Skyhold."

"I hope you're right amatus."

"Oi!" Sera yelled back at them. "Get moving! Cully-wully saw something ahead!"

"Please stop calling me that." Cullen groaned from where he crouched near the exit of the cave they were in.

"What is it Commander?" Dorian whispered, kneeling at his side.

"There." He pointed, as Dorian followed where he was looking to where four Venatori appeared to be wandering aimlessly up the sandy slope muttering to themselves and ignoring each other.

"What in the name of the bloody Maker are they doing?" He breathed, a puzzled look on his face.

"Could they be warding the area against trespassers?" Varric ventured.

"If they are, they seem to be making a mess of it and they aren't following any pattern that I can see."

"We're wasting time." Fenris growled. "Cullen and I can take care of these four. The rest of you keep watch for more of them. Follow me Commander."

"Fenris!" Dorian hissed in protest, but the elf was already gone, ghosting up the sand with Cullen hot on his heels.

"You sure picked a bossy one magey pants." Sera observed, watching in fascination as Fenris phased through two of his enemies while Cullen silenced the other two before they even knew they were under attack.

Dorian grunted, his eyes tight with worry as Fenris cut down the third Venatori with his broadsword while Cullen delivered a killing blow to the fourth. Their opponents dead and in some cases several pieces, the two warriors made quick work of searching the bodies before returning to their companions.

"What the bloody blazes was that?" He demanded as Fenris approached, splattered head to toe in blood and gore.

"Satisfying." He smirked.

"Satisfying! Satisfying? We don't even know if they're alone! It could have been a trap! More could be watching as we speak and now we've lost the element of surprise!" He sputtered, his face going red with anger.

"There was no trap and we're here to kill Venatori. We just eliminated four of them and the only thing we exposed was two warriors, not you. Since you're their target I doubt they will take notice, even if they are watching, which I doubt." Fenris retorted.

Dorian crossed his arms and moved away from him, too angry and upset to utter another word without sounding half-crazed.

"Yes, well." Cullen interjected uncomfortably as he shifted in place. "I spotted another tunnel nearby which seems to lead down into the oasis. We can reach it from here without giving too much away. Follow me."

Sera and Varric fell in behind while Dorian walked at Cullen's side, ignoring Fenris who now wore an expression of worry as he trailed behind them.

Fenris wasn't about to apologize for killing Venatori, but he knew he'd crossed a line ignoring Dorian's fears. But he wouldn't apologize for that either since he also knew he'd acted out of fear for Dorian. He hadn't much cared in the moment for tactics or caution he just wanted his amatus safe, but he knew he'd screwed up. Maker, but this relationship thing was hard. His heart hurt just thinking of Dorian being injured or taken from him. He couldn't think straight and found it hard to breathe at the mere hint of it. He kicked a rock at his feet sending it skittering across the sand as he hurried after his companions, resolving to get his emotions under control before he did something Dorian couldn't forgive him for.

 


	47. Favours and Apologies

They made camp on a sandy ledge just above a small, glittering pool complete with a waterfall. Dorian paced the sandy ground just beyond the camp, his eyes taking in all the different approaches which could be used to ambush them while they slept. He didn't like how vulnerable the camp was or how easily any approaching force could remain hidden until it was too late.

Cullen came to join him as his mind worked furiously to come up with a solution, saying nothing as Cullen stood behind him.

"You're thinking our camp is too exposed." Cullen mused as Dorian studied the path they'd followed into the oasis.

"Very astute Commander." Dorian replied, staring at the rocky ledge above them.

Cullen followed his line of sight and gave a snort of agreement. "I certainly hope you aren't considering bringing that wall of rock crashing down here to block it."

"Nothing so barbaric and southern as that my dear Cullen, though placing a giant rock here _is_ part of my plan." He said, flicking his wrist at the rocky ledge and breaking off a giant piece which he then lowered into place, blocking the path he was staring at.

"Are you truly that worried Dorian?" Cullen asked quietly, studying the hard look in the mage's eyes and the stiff set to his shoulders.

"Do you really have to ask?" He snapped, muttering under his breath as he traced sigils in the air, warding the rock and setting rune traps on either side. "They're looking for me. They sent a letter to taunt me that were after me and here I am making myself a target. On top of that, Fenris is determined to wipe them all out before we can learn anything about what they're up to out here."

"I'm sure he's only worried for you Dorian. For your safety."

"As if I don't know that. But they know of him too, the danger to him is just as serious and just as real. But do you see him being cautious? No, of course not, he's the invincible Ghost who can do anything, survive anything. Believes himself to be indestructible. After all his years of freedom it has made him complacent, over-confident. He's forgotten the power of true Magisters drunk on power and blood magic, but I don't dare say so since I know he won't listen."

"I'm sure he knows Dorian and he would listen to you if you reminded him. I admit his actions earlier were shocking, but he is a very capable warrior who has seen more than his share of battles."

"That just means his averages are reducing his string of good fortune." Dorian retorted, moving to the next path leading to their camp. "Since I can't stop him from running headlong into battle I'm going to place wards all over this area. If you wouldn't mind watching my back or spotting approaches I don't see, I would appreciate it."

"Of course." Cullen nodded, clamping his mouth shut on anything he might have said to talk Dorian out of his annoyance.

Half an hour later, the small valley had been warded against a surprise attack as much as was possible. With his preparations in place, Dorian returned to camp. After collecting his soaps and a towel, he returned to the pool below, just out of sight of prying eyes to wash the sand from his skin. Dumping the contents on a small dry spot, he got to work removing his cloak and leathers, eager to feel clean. The sound of soft footfalls through the water's edge had him tensing, recognizing the tread of Fenris, whose step was unmistakable.

"Go away." He growled, keeping his back to the warrior as he stepped into the water. "I don't want to talk to you right now."

"Good." Fenris replied, the sound of armour landing on the ground reaching Dorian's ears. "Because I wasn't planning on doing much talking."

Dorian tensed as he lowered himself into the water, sitting on the sandy bottom and using the soap to wash his legs. "Then I hope those plans don't involve me for I have no interest in seeing you right now either."

Warmth flooded through Dorian's back as Fenris came closer, his arms going around his waist as the elf bent his head to his ear. "Then close your eyes amatus."

Dorian growled and tried to pull away but Fenris held him close. "I'm sorry Dorian. I was only trying to protect you. I know it was foolish and reckless but I couldn't help it. I want this threat against you destroyed. Please forgive me." He whispered, placing a tender kiss to Dorian's neck.

"That's not fair." He groaned, leaning back into Fenris' chest, tilting his head to the side, inviting the elf's lips to continue their path of kisses to his shoulder.

"You know I have never played fair amatus." Fenris sighed, his breath a whisper of air against his skin, drawing a shiver from him.

Dorian drew a shuddering breath. "Well that's certainly true."

Fenris relaxed his hold and turned Dorian to face him, his eyes filled with love and remorse. "I am sorry Dorian."

Dorian hummed low in his throat, his chest tight as he stared into the vulnerable need for reassurance he saw in his lover's eyes. "Just shut up and kiss me already." He growled, his breath catching as Fenris claimed his lips in a hungry kiss.

"Amatus." He sighed, his hands going around the elf's neck to hold him close. "I forgive you, but only if you stop throwing yourself into danger on my behalf. We're not alone out here, we have friends to help us. Let them help."

Fenris put his forehead to Dorian's and stared into his eyes. "I know. It's just..." He faltered.

"You don't have to say it. I understand, but I would never survive losing you if you sacrificed yourself to save me."

Fenris responded by kissing him, pouring what he felt into the press of lips and the invitation to explore and taste as he parted them in a tangle of tongues. Dorian groaned and pulled them closer together, his arousal trapped between them as Fenris ground his hip against him. "Mage, my mage... " He whispered, his voice rough with need, desire and longing.

"My beautiful, incredible warrior. Maker, you make me feel so alive Fenris..." He sighed against his lips. "Please don't leave me."

"Never." Fenris groaned against him. "I need you Dorian. Please, can we..?"

"As if you even have to ask." Dorian smiled, his hands sliding down to remove the warrior's breeches, freeing his hard length and drawing a gasp of pleasure from his lover as his hand closed around it.

Fenris' hand joined his, drawing his smalls over Dorian's hips and stroking them together. Fenris kissed him again, rising to his knees and drawing Dorian with him as he continued to stroke their lengths, his hand joining Dorian's as he moaned into his parted lips.

Their hips jerked against each other, their hands finding a rhythm as they held each other close. The need to feel the other alive and well and theirs overcoming their fears and losing themselves to touch, taste and sensation. Fenris growled low in his throat at he lifted his lips from Dorian's, the mage gasping as his orgasm rippled through him, making his hips stutter as he spilled himself over their joined hands. Fenris followed a moment later with a bitten off cry of Dorian's name, gasping into the mage's neck while Dorian trembled in his arms.

Muscles weakened from their joined release, they sank into the knee high water, still clinging to each other as the quiet sounds of the nearby waterfall returned to fill the silence over the sound of their breathing.

"Maker Fenris..." Dorian sighed when he could breathe again. "I have never felt anything so incredible before, so all-consuming. It's like a fire I can never put out that only grows hotter when you touch me."

Fenris chuckled and put a hand to Dorian's cheek, his thumb swiping softly over the mage's kiss-swollen lip. "I feel the same. Though you are more like a delicious drug to me and I am drunk on your touch, your kiss and your affection."

Dorian sighed. "I... I'm afraid Fenris. This, what we have... it terrifies me that I might lose you. Promise me you'll be careful? I want... I would like us to have a future together when all this is over. I don't want to fear losing you any longer than I have to. I think we were mad to start something with the world at stake... but even saying that, even if I could go back, I would still make the same choice to be with you."

"Mage..." Fenris groaned, pressing his lips to Dorian's, unable to speak past the sudden lump in his throat and the tightness in his chest. Dorian kissed him back, needy, desperate and full of a desire to claim his mouth as much as he had already claimed his soul.

Dorian broke the kiss, resting his forehead against Fenris' in a sigh of contentment and tired resignation. "We should get back before our companions decide we've been kidnapped and come looking for us."

Fenris nodded and released his hold on him, reaching for Dorian's soap. Without speaking he washed the mage, running his hands over his chest and arms with such reverence it made Dorian's breath catch. When he finished, Dorian took the soap from him and did the same to Fenris, his touch gentle and soothing, both of them taking comfort from it as something they could not express through words.

When they finished, they each helped the other to dry before dressing again. Fenris caught Dorian's hand in his, pulling him to a stop as Dorian moved to head back to camp.

"Dorian."

"Mmm?"

"I have something for you."

"Oh?"

"I meant to give it to you back at Skyhold but I never had the opportunity."

Dorian frowned. "What is it?"

"Your favour." He said, holding out his other hand, palm upturned to reveal a silver chain with a small charm attached.

Dorian picked it up and brought it closer, his breath catching at the silver wolf charm, complete with tiny green serpentine eyes which sparkled in the setting light of the sun. "It's beautiful Fenris. But I thought a favour was meant to be something we already owned? This seems... far more extravagant than the bit of cloth you're wearing on your wrist."

Fenris blushed. "It hadn't occurred to me you could not ask for a similar token. I had the charm made from a part of my old armour which couldn't be salvaged. The... serpentine was something I found in my travels with Hawke."

"It's perfect Fen." He said, words failing him as he continued to marvel at the intricacy of the charm, the detail remarkable. "Would you mind putting it on me?"

Fenris smiled, his throat tight at Dorian's affectionate shortening of his name. He took hold of the necklace and moved behind Dorian to drape it around his neck. It glittered like silver sparkles of light against the mage's dusky skin, drawing a chuckle from him as Dorian put his hand to it as though to assure himself it was really there.

"What?" Dorian frowned.

"It... sparkles on you." He smirked.

Dorian rolled his eyes. "Don't you dare point that out to Varric amatus."

Fenris placed a swift kiss to Dorian's lips. "I won't, but that doesn't mean he won't notice. Come on, let's get back before Cullen decides to come looking for us."

  


 


	48. Tunnels and Dead Ends

The following morning the companions waited while Dorian cleared his sigils for the path west of the camp and made steady progress checking caves and paths for any sign of the Venatori. By mid-day they'd made a sweep of half the oasis but had found little more than a few discarded magical tomes Dorian said were inconsequential.

After a short break to eat and rest, they resumed their search of the oasis, pausing outside a dark cave.

"Well shite." Sera swore. "I don't like this cave. There's no torches, just that stupid veil-fire shite. Can't see nothing with that magical crap, makes it seem like the shadows are moving."

"I have to agree." Cullen nodded, his face grim. "What purpose does it serve that all the torches are of veil-fire? Dorian, you have any ideas on this?"

"Typically veil-fire is used to simply illuminate runes carved on a wall. I agree they are a poor substitute for torches. In this instance, I can't imagine why it's been used here."

Fenris had ventured inside, lighting his brands to cast more light as he followed the dark passage. "There's a ladder back there. I believe it leads out of the valley we're in."

"Not a fan of climbing ladders in the dark." Varric grumbled.

"I can't say I'm fond of it either." Cullen agreed. "But it needs to be checked out regardless."

"Well then." Dorian smiled. "Lead the way Commander, I'll send up some wisps to help with the dark."

"Just make sure you keep your magey crap away from me." Sera growled, following after Cullen.

"For the last time Sera, magical light is not crap. It's helpful." Dorian reminded her. "It can't hurt you."

Sera snorted and kept walking while Varric followed.

"I keep telling you Sparkler, just give up already. She's never going to believe you."

"But it's just silly." Dorian protested as he stood at the bottom of the ladder waiting for his three companions to reach the next level before following. "Because covering yourself in elemental goo is so much safer." He muttered under his breath.

Fenris chuckled behind him as they began their ascent. "It might not be safer but it is entertaining."

"And yet she refuses to call it magic." Dorian huffed. "It's ridiculous."

"Then just agree to disagree. Maybe you can find out where she gets those concoctions and make up a new one that makes her glow."

Dorian laughed. "That wouldn't really serve much purpose amatus."

"It's what came to mind first mage, but it's more about setting her at ease than adding to her arsenal."

Dorian reached the landing and turned to give Fenris a hand up. "You constantly surprise me amatus." He whispered, surprising the elf with a swift kiss. "Thank you."

"There's another landing up here." Cullen called from above them. "Looks like there's one more and that it leads to a tunnel. Probably a way out."

"We're on our way." Dorian called back.

Fenris nodded for Dorian to precede him up the ladder. "Let's go mage, I'm right behind you."

"In any other setting and I could do something very sinful with that statement."

Fenris snickered. "I've no doubt of that, but get moving love. I'm starting to dislike this cave as much as everyone else."

Dorian huffed at him and headed up the next ladder. "I'll be glad when this business is done."

"Agreed."

Ten minutes later they were outside the cave, surrounded by sand and rock and standing a hundred feet above the oasis.

"Good to be outside again." Varric said. "So Curly, what now?"

Cullen frowned at the dwarf. "Varric, the path only goes one way."

"True. But it doesn't look like there's much over there except more sand."

"Still gotta look right?" Sera asked, skipping ahead of Cullen. "Sides, so long as there's no caves I'm happy."

"Lead the way then Buttercup."

"Just... be careful!" Cullen shouted after her as she disappeared around a rocky slope. "Maker's breath, I'm not sure why the Inquisitor sent her on this excursion. She's not exactly suited to fighting Venatori."

"Maybe not." Dorian agreed, joining him as they followed her up the path. "But you have to admit it's not boring with her around and she does like sticking things with arrows, so there's that."

"So long as she sticks them in the right things." Cullen muttered, rubbing a hand over his forehead.

Dorian noticed the gesture and frowned at the older blonde man. "Are you all right?"

Cullen looked at him, confused for a moment and looked away. "I'm fine. It's just a small headache."

"I could help with that if you like."

"Thank you but it won't be of much help until we've finished for the day. Remind me later."

"Alright."

"Hey you lazy nugs hurry up!" Sera shouted from ahead. "Found something!"

Minutes later they were standing on a small wooden platform staring down into another cave.

"It's another cave." Dorian murmured unhappily. "Complete with stairs that don't reach the ground and all the torches are lit. Anyone else have a bad feeling?"

"The Inquisitor's party might have left them burning. She did come here and deal with the rifts after all." Cullen reminded them.

"I agree with Dorian. Why would she have left the torches burning?" Fenris argued.

Cullen sighed. "I don't know. I suppose it doesn't make a lot of sense, but we still have to check it out."

"So we're all good for jumping in a hole then?" Dorian asked.

"I don't see we have much choice in the matter." Cullen replied, stepping down onto the wooden walkway. "I'll go down first. Sera and Varric can follow and you two can bring up the rear. I'll check for magical traps before you come down."

"Yay. More caves." Sera groaned.

"Cheer up Buttercup." Varric teased. "At least there's no veil-fire."

"Ugh!" "Sera snorted. "Maybe not, but it's still more stupid caves."

"Seems we're in agreement, reluctant as it might be." Dorian observed, his brow still furrowed. "Lead the way Commander."

 


	49. Separated

"So three tunnels and one dead end." Varric grumbled. "Doesn't seem like a simple thing to check either."

"That one over there just leads outside to another walkway." Sera muttered absently.

"How do you know that?" Cullen asked.

"Already looked while the rest of you took your time _observing_." She sneered. "Looks like it leads to more tunnels."

"I'm getting a headache." Dorian sighed. "How do we check them? We could be following these blasted things all afternoon at this rate."

"We should split up." Fenris said, drawing sharp looks from both Cullen and Dorian.

"That's not funny amatus."

"I agree with Dorian. The Venatori are here somewhere and if they know you're here they may just be waiting for us to make a mistake like that."

"And if we don't split up we could be here a week and never find them." Fenris retorted. "They could be shadowing our movements and hiding where we've already searched."

"No they can't amatus." Dorian sighed. "I collapsed the entrances to all the caves we found so far except the one with the veil-fire. If they're here we haven't found them yet."

"Well we ain't finding anything standing round here talkin' about it." Sera growled.

"Alright." Cullen nodded. "Follow me. I have an idea."

With a collective shrug they followed Cullen down the short path Sera had already checked. "Alright." Cullen said, staring at the tunnel to the left. "Sera, you keep watch at this entry. It looks like it could lead down to the oasis. If so, we can check it after we've cleared the other paths. Varric you keep watch at the one to our left. It seems logical that it leads back to the open area we just vacated."

"You got it curly."

"Keep in sight of each other." He reminded them, fixing Sera with a stern look.

"Ugh! Fine alright? I promise, no exploring."

"Dorian, Fenris and I will check the third path and we'll meet back here once we've finished."

"We'll be waiting Curly." Varric assured them. "If we see anything we'll start yelling."

"Just don't go anywhere alone." Dorian said sternly.

"Promise Sparkler."

\----xxx----

"Whoever carved these blasted tunnels needs a swift kick up their arse. How can anyone have possibly known where they were going to end up? They don't make any sense." Dorian grumbled.

"I think that might have been the idea." Fenris answered. "Wandering these paths would have discouraged most treasure seekers long before they made it half this far."

"Or been killed by giant spiders." Cullen muttered from ahead of them as he stepped over the remains of a dead one. "There must have been a nest here not long ago."

"I imagine our lovely Inquisitor took care of that." Dorian noted. "By the way, how are things going in that department Cullen?"

"What things?" Cullen asked, turning away to hide the faint blush on his cheeks.

"Oh you know, secretive smiles, knowing looks, carefree laughter. You and the Inquisitor are getting along are you not?"

"I have the utmost respect for the Inquisitor. She's a very capable woman."

"Come now Commander. Surely you have better words than that to describe your budding romance."

Fenris huffed at Dorian's back. "Leave the poor man alone Dorian. He's not as... demonstrative as you in speaking about his affections."

"Neither was I until after I met you amatus." Dorian corrected. "Besides I'm just trying to help. You'd be much less tense if you let things happen naturally Cullen. Might reduce your headache frequency as well."

"I appreciate the thought Dorian, but now is..." Cullen cut himself off and looked ahead, holding a hand up to them as he froze in place. "I hear something ahead of us. Wait here, I'll have a look."

Before Dorian or Fenris could protest, Cullen had moved off ahead of them. He returned in minutes, a scowl marring his features. "Blasted nugs. There's a wooden barricade ahead, I broke it down and it leads back to the oasis."

"Another bloody dead end." Dorian swore.

"I admit this is getting tiresome." Cullen agreed.

Fenris let out the breath he'd been holding as the two men talked. "Let's get back to Sera and Varric then and check that last path. I don't think we're going to find anything today."

Dorian and Cullen nodded as they followed Fenris back the way they'd come. "Unfortunate, but I have to agree." Cullen murmured, waiting with Dorian at the bottom of the ladder while Fenris stepped onto the landing above.

"I for one am looking forward to clearing these bloody tunnels." Dorian muttered, starting his ascent up the ladder. "What about you Fenris? What are you looking forward to?"

Fenris didn't respond and Dorian climbed faster, clearing the top a moment later. "Fenris?" He called, but there was no sign of the elf. "Amatus!"

Cullen joined him a moment later, hurrying up the ladder at the sound of rising panic in Dorian's voice. "Where'd he go?"

Dorian heart was thrumming in his chest. "He better not have gone ahead without us." He growled. "Fenris! Where are you? Get back here! We're supposed to stay together damn it!"

"Calm down Dorian. I'm sure he can't be far." Cullen said, leading them back down the path, his pace quickening with each step.

They reached the large room with the broken ladder but saw no sign of Fenris. Dorian's heart was pounding with fear, his hands damp with sweat as they made their way back to Sera and Varric.

"Sera. Have you seen anything since we left?" Cullen asked knowing Dorian was fast losing his ability to think rationally.

"Nope. Saw some nugs but that's all. Why?" She asked, her face scrunching up in a concerned frown. "What happened?"

"We're not sure, but we can't find Fenris."

Varric joined them on hearing them talking, catching Cullen's response.

"You lost the elf?"

Dorian scowled and stabbed his staff into the ground. "We didn't lose him. We were on our way back and he just... disappeared. I was right behind him going up the ladder but when I reached the top there was no sign of him."

"People don't just vanish yeah?" Sera asked, a note of fear in her voice. "He's gotta be here somewhere."

"Sera's right. Perhaps we missed something. A trap door or a hidden doorway or something. Sera and Varric might be able to see what we can't." Cullen nodded. "Come on, let's head back there."

  


 


	50. Vanished

Varric and Sera checked the passageway where Fenris had vanished, following the path twenty feet past the top of the ladder. "Bloody stupid, paranoid shites." Sera grumbled, walking slow along the right side of the tunnel. "If there's anything hidden here it's damn impressive cuz I can't see anything what looks like a trap."

"Varric?" Dorian called, trying and failing, to hide the worry in his voice. "Please tell me you've found something."

Varric grunted and looked back to where Dorian and Cullen waited for them. "I found something. But it's not what you're hoping for." Varric said, his voice strained.

Dorian scowled as he joined him in the passage. "What? What have you found?"

"I think it might be blood."

Dorian felt all the blood drain rush out of his head and a wave of dizziness washed over him. "Blood? Where?"

Cullen and Sera joined them, each looking where the dwarf was pointing. "Damn." Sera swore.

"That's not encouraging."

"Not encouraging?" Dorian was near hysterical. "Where did the blood come from? We don't even know it's his! Even if it is, it doesn't explain how he vanished or where!"

Cullen met Dorian's eyes and clapped a hand to his shoulder. "I know this is hard Dorian but we need you to stay calm. You're our expert here. Is there a spell you know of these Venatori could have used to do this?"

Dorian took a deep breath but the tension didn't leave his shoulders. "I don't know. I'm sure there are, but considering they use blood magic to do it, I have no idea what they might be. Invisibility is possible. Or a don't see me spell which is similar. Add silence and a barrier and we may have walked right past them while they went in the opposite direction."

"Shit Sparkler." Varric sighed.

"Is there any way you can detect what magic might have been used? I realize a bit of blood isn't much of a clue, but I think it's all we're going to find."

Dorian put a hand to his forehead, massaging his temples. "I hate this." He murmured. "But yes it can be done. I'll need an hour back at camp to work out the details. It's normally an easy spell but I've never seen this magic before, it's more advanced, which means I have to assume any residue will also be hard to detect."

"Great." Sera growled. "I was really looking forward to filling them with arrows."

Varric sighed loudly, drawing their attention. "Maker's breath... I can't believe I'm going to say this, but can we make use of the blood to... I dunno, track the person it came from?"

Dorian gaped at the dwarf as though he'd grown two heads. "Blood magic? Have you lost your mind?"

"Of course not! But can we use it or not? You know, like a phylactery."

Dorian's mouth moved as though to say something, but nothing came so he resorted to glaring when Cullen cleared his throat. "Um. It might be possible. Though it's a very small chance given the blood is dried and contaminated."

"Andraste's tits! Have you all been possessed? I can't believe I'm the only one agreeing with sparkle fingers!" Sera shrieked.

Dorian crossed his arms, a scowl on his face. "Please enlighten us Commander. Are you seriously condoning using blood magic? And what do you mean it _might_ work?"

Cullen blushed and stared intently at his boots. "I've been involved in the procedure for making phylacteries when I was in the Circle. Though that was much simpler than what's needed here."

"Blood magic. Between that and the use of lyrium to control Templars..." Dorian growled, searching his pockets for an empty vial. "The more I hear about the Southern Chantry's, the more I wonder why your mages didn't rebel sooner." Bending down to the spots of blood on the ground, he used the vial like a scoop to ease as many drops as he could into it. Stoppering the end, he stood, shoving the vial in his pocket. "Let's go." He growled, heading back to camp.

 

\----xxx----

 

"I don't think this is usable." Dorian muttered, glaring at the vial. "There's too much dirt."

"Is there any way you can clean it without dilution?" Cullen asked, watching Dorian's jaw clench. "Perhaps with lyrium or maybe a reverse re-gen spell? Something using necromancy perhaps?"

Dorian turned his angry glare on Cullen. "Necromancy is used on the dead Commander. Not blood."

"I understand how you're feeling Dorian. I'm only trying to help."

Dorian's eyes were cold. "How can you possibly understand? My... my best friend, my... my amatus is in the hands of the most dangerous, most ruthless mages from Tevinter! You can't possibly understand what I'm feeling."

Cullen sighed. "You're right. I'm sorry. I'm just trying to help you focus. We'll find him Dorian, I know we will."

Dorian's lower lip trembled as he broke eye contact with him. "I know you are... it's just, the longer he's missing..."

Cullen put a hand to Dorian's shoulder, turning him to meet his eyes. "Don't go there Dorian. If you think the blood we found isn't enough, leave it and work on your spell. I'll see if I can come up with something to clean what we have."

Dorian frowned. "I'm not sure I understand how you can accomplish that if I can't, but thank you. Give me a half hour to work out my spell and we'll head back."

Dorian moved to the edge of camp, journal in hand as he madly scribbled numbers and symbols on the page. Cullen took up the vial, staring at the contents while he called up memories of creating phylacteries in the Circle.

"Ever feel like a third wheel?" Sera grumbled where she sat cross-legged at the campfire.

Varric gave a half-hearted chuckle, though he didn't sound happy. "All the time, but never more than when I was following Hawke around Kirkwall."

"Bet there were lots of opportunities to use arrows in that shit-hole."

"More than I liked most days. Though dealing with qunari and criminals in Kirkwall was a lot simpler than holes in the sky and crazy undead Magisters."

"Be glad when this is done. Need things to be normal again." Sera murmured, her voice dropping to a whisper. "You think grumpy is okay?" She asked, her eyes flicking to Dorian and back to Varric.

Varric met her eyes a moment before moving on to where Dorian was deep in concentration. "Honestly? I don't know." He whispered, his voice troubled. "Normally he can take care of himself, but these are Tevinter mages. I'm not sure he's capable of separating his past while surrounded by those who see him as a slave."

"Shit." Sera swore. "Thought you'd have something more cheery to say."

"Sorry Buttercup. Just don't have the energy right now."

"Alright. I think I've got it." Dorian announced, joining them. "Let's go."

"Bout time." Sera muttered, getting to her feet.

Dorian headed out, Cullen falling in at his side while Varric and Sera followed. "Get anything useful out of staring at that vial?" Dorian asked Cullen.

"Perhaps. I won't know for certain until we have a direction to head in." Cullen replied.

Dorian grunted. "Did you solve the problem then?"

"As I said, perhaps."

  
  


 


	51. Blood Magic and the Fade

Dorian had them stand ten feet away from where Varric had spotted the drops of blood. He stood back himself, muttering a long string of words in Tevene, his hands making quick patterns in the air before him. A moment later a soft blue glow emanated from his palms and a drop of that blue light dripped down to the ground and began to pulse.

The light was faint at first and then began to glow, travelling back toward the room with the ladder. Dorian flicked his wrist again in a snapping gesture, a frown on his face.

"Venhedis." He swore, waving his other hand for the others to join him while his eyes remained fixed in the ground. "Whoever did this, my initial assessment was correct." He said as the others joined him.

"Which is what?" Cullen asked.

"A bubble of silence and a modified version of a crushing prison. You and I walked right past Fenris." Dorian scowled. "They then waited for us to leave the tunnel before they moved him."

"Why are we standing around talking about it?" Sera growled. "And what's with the glowy stuff on the ground? Shouldn't we follow it?"

"I'm getting to that." Dorian retorted, his voice strained. "There was a lot of blood magic used here. I... I don't want to think about this... but, we must be very careful going forward. Fenris was caught in a rune trap, which means they know we're here and how many of us there are. Likely they've known everything the minute we arrived."

"So if they are expecting us, any further traps will be specific to each of us." Cullen concluded.

"Exactly. Though they might not be prepared for you Commander. Like all mages from Tevinter, I doubt any of these have ever faced a true Templar."

"But we don't know for sure."

"No." Dorian sighed.

"Well I've got some stealth clouds I can use and not just for hiding myself, but redirecting attention." Varric said. "If I go ahead of you, Sera can follow but take a less direct path. Make it seem like we're not sure where they went and you two follow."

"It could work, but it will put both you and Sera in the most immediate danger. They aren't interested in you, they're after me which means everyone else is expendable." Dorian cautioned.

"Danger, shmanger." Sera growled. "Let's get going yeah? Grumpy needs us and I need to stick them with arrows for taking em."

"Alright." Dorian agreed. "Just... be careful."

Varric looked at him, his eyes troubled, as he turned his attention to the faint blue path on the ground. "Don't worry Sparkler. We'll find him and give those Venatori what's coming to them."

Dorian nodded and fell in behind the two rogues as they followed the path down the tunnel they'd not been able to check earlier. It led them back to the veil-fire cave, making them all tense as they climbed the ladders for a second time that day.

Back outside, Varric tossed a few smoke grenades ahead of where he walked, waiting several minutes before disappearing in a cloud of black smoke. Sera followed, meandering down the path as though confused about which direction they should take. Cullen and Dorian followed, their faces tense as they kept their eyes on Sera, ignoring everything but her.

After twenty minutes of this, Dorian was loosing patience, his hands welling with magical energy where they hung loose at his sides. "Dorian. I know you're worried but there's no reason to think they'll do anything before they catch you."

"There are plenty of reasons." Dorian hissed. "Or have you forgotten that Fenris is a walking lyrium mine?"

Cullen gasped, his eyes widening in horror. "Maker. Surely they wouldn't..."

"You're not serious? Of course they would! They have no reason not to. I'm sure they're well aware of Danarius' research on the matter. There are few enough like Fenris in the Imperium that he'd be a prized commodity. If not for their desire to catch me, they would most certainly have gone after him."

"Forgive me then. I... that hadn't occurred to me. But I promise you we'll find him."

Dorian refused to meet Cullen's eyes as he nodded. "I know." He said, though he didn't add, hopefully before it's too late.

 


	52. Thralled

Fenris knew he was screwed the minute he took one too many steps past the ladder. The unmistakable tingle of magic that rushed through his markings as the trap sprung had him instantly tense, his mouth open to shout a warning, but neither Cullen or Dorian heard him.

A shield bubble sprang up around him, holding him immobile as it dragged him closer to the wall and away from his companions. He shouted and tried beating against it but they couldn't hear him and his efforts only made the pressure surrounding him increase. Arms trapped at his side's, he could do nothing to let anyone know he was still there, still watching them. The look on Dorian's face when he realized Fenris was gone tore a sob from him, anger boiling over as he renewed his struggles to free himself.

Then they were gone, headed back to camp and he remained trapped in the bubble, ears straining to listen for whoever had trapped him. Dorian and the others hadn't been fine long when two black, hooded figures appeared before him. Neither spoke as one dispelled the bubble holding him as the other set a binding spell on his wrists, forcing them behind his back.

He dug his heels into the rough ground refusing to move until one of them sent a surge of magic coursing through his markings, the sudden pain sending him to his knees. It had been so long since anyone had used the lyrium in his skin, the pain had him seeing stars and black spots floated at the edge of his vision.

He struggled back to his feet, glaring at the hooded figure as they pointed at him to get moving, hand extended and fingers sparking with magic. He growled and dug his feet in again, hoping to stall long enough for the others to return.

The other figure made a gesture he didn't recognize and excruciating pain coursed through him, his brow damp with sweat as he fell again, unable to stop his head from hitting the ground with his wrists bound behind his back. When he could stand again, both figures had their hands extended toward him and he hung his head in defeat. The implication was clear. He either started walking he they would end everything here and now.

Gritting his teeth, he started walking. Not because he wanted to give up, but because if he didn't, Dorian would be next and he would not let them have his amatus without a fight. But he needed to be alive for that and he couldn't do that if he was dead.

The Venatori directed him back to the cave with the veil-fire and he couldn't say he was surprised by it. One of his captors pointed at him, muttering words in Tevene he couldn't catch and then he felt the pull of blood magic. His mind recoiled in horror even as the bindings fell from his wrists and his body began climbing the first ladder. Visions of past abuses he'd suffered under the thrall of blood magic assaulted his mind as he reached the first landing.

By the time he reached the top of the dark shaft, his skin was covered in the sweat of fear and revulsion. His mind was screaming as his body tried and failed to recoil from the proximity of the blood mage standing beside him. The Venatori snapped his fingers then and the blood thrall fell away, his wrists once more bound behind him.

His sense of relief was so strong, a loud sigh escaped him, drawing a muted chuckle from the Venatori behind him. The other motioned for him to follow as he walked around the platform toward the back of the cave. Fenris followed reluctantly, the second Venatori close on his heels, his magic prickling along his skin, making him tense.

He held his breath as the leader waved his hand before a recessed alcove and the outline of a door became visible. He passed through it and stood to the side, the second Venatori herding him forward into another tunnel, this one also lit with veil-fire

After several more minutes of walking, they came to another hidden door that opened onto a small rounded cave. Fenris froze after taking five steps inside, red lyrium visible in small crates all along the far wall. Another, taller Venatori stood in the centre of the room, watching him from beneath a dark hood.

"Ah. The slave finally arrives." The man said with a nod to his fellows who stepped back out of the light, instantly enveloped in shadow. Fenris knew they hadn't left, he could feel their magic prickling along his skin, but he could not tell where they now stood.

"I am not a slave." He growled.

The Venatori laughed. "Perhaps not here in the South. But where you belong, with me, in the Imperium with those markings on your skin... you will always be a slave. You will always have our superior brand upon your body and you will always be property."

"I own my markings." Fenris snarled. "They do not own me."

"Tsk. Tsk. Seems your time with my lover has given you a bit of backbone."

Fenris inhaled sharply at the mention of a lover. He knew the man was trying to bait him, but doubts crept into his mind. "No one gave me backbone mage." He sneered. "I earned my freedom and paid for it in blood."

The Venatori chuckled again, closing the distance between them. Dropping his hood, he stared into his eyes and Fenris had to fight his reaction to the sight of the red glow that stared back at him. "Don't think I don't see the doubt in your eyes elf. Dorian is my lover. We spent years planning together. You think no one coveted a prize like you? Or that anyone could wait so long to possess you?"

"You're a liar mage."

"You think me a liar? Pity. Things would be so much simpler if you believed me." The man shrugged. "No matter. Soon Dorian will join me and we can put the rest of our plan for you in motion."

"Like all mages you still believe yourself superior. But you're just men, still mortal and you die as easy as any other."

"We'll see. But enough pleasantries. My name is Rilienus Navale, Altus and leader of the Orlais Venatori. And you," Rilienus paused, hands clasped behind his back as he threw him an amused smirk, "are a slave named Fenris, though I think little wolf suits you so much better considering how easy you were to capture. I believe the tales of your exploits were grossly exaggerated, though your influence on one magister in particular is most gratifying. You're also a portable lyrium mine and the perfect bait."

Fenris froze at the last word, his body tense, his breath tight in his chest.

"Ah. A reaction at last. I knew sending that letter was the right call. I can see by the look on your face you know who I am. Better, you know what I am to Dorian."

"A mistake." Fenris seethed as the mage drew closer, a flick of the man's wrist and a quick burst of magic freezing him to the floor.

Rilienus reached out to caress Fenris' cheek, frowning when he failed to make contact with the warrior's skin, though he covered it quickly with a forced laugh. "Is that what he told you? My, he's better at the Game than I ever gave him credit for."

"What game are you playing at mage? You say I'm bait and this is a trap. Then you say I've been used as a pawn. Which is it? Do you even know which is lie and which is truth? Has the lyrium already driven you mad?"

Rilienus drew back his hand as if to hit him but stopped at the last second, a scowl on his lips, his eyes troubled. "There's something... different about you. What has Pavus done that I can't touch you?" He muttered as though Fenris hadn't spoken.

Straightening, he smiled again though Fenris wasn't certain Rilienus even saw him as he turned to address the shadows. "Bring him to the preparation room. I want to see how my new lyrium mine works." He said, turning and heading through a doorway to his left.

The scent of ozone filled the air as one of the other Venatori dispelled the ice at his feet. Hands extended, the mage pointed him towards another door to his right, palms crackling with power. Furious at his current helplessness, he moved to the door and almost fainted when he caught sight of the table in the centre of the room. A crackle of electricity shot through his back and he stumbled forward, his thigh hitting the table as the force propelled him into it.

He reeled at the wash of memory assaulting him from the last table he'd seen identical to this one. While still disoriented, the two Venatori used force magic to strap him to the table on his back, restraints at his wrists and ankles before he could think to fight back.

Cold descended on him, his fear and remembered pain assaulting his mind as the Venatori left. Sweat broke out on his brow and he began to tremble, his skin covered in goosebumps.

Rilienus returned while he was still fighting his haunting memories, almost missing the snort of disgust the man let loose. "Stupid, stupid, stupid." He heard him growl as he got control over his panicked breathing. "How am I supposed to test my new lyrium mine with all those bloody clothes on?" He murmured as though Fenris couldn't hear him.

Rilienus moved further into the room, his face looming over him as he took in his current state. "Well that's an unexpected bonus. Here I thought you had no memories of this table." He chuckled. "So, fear. Yes, I can work with that. Let's get started shall we?" He smiled, extending his hands over Fenris' chest.

Fenris tensed, slamming his eyes shut against the pull of magic on his skin and the inevitable pain that would follow, but nothing happened.

He cracked an eye open to see Rilienus' face twisted in confusion, hands still extended as he moved them up and down the length of the elf's body. "What trickery is this?!" He snarled. "I can feel the lyrium in you, I can practically taste it on my tongue. Why can I not access it slave?!" He continued, his eyes beginning to glow red.

Fenris blinked and returned Rilienus' confused look. "I have no answer for you mage. I don't know."

"You lie!" Rilienus screamed, his hands shaking. "You're hiding something from me!"

"I am not and I cannot remove the lyrium or reverse what was done to me."

Rilienus stared at him, his eyes cold. "Perhaps not." He nodded. "But something, some enchantment is at work here. I will figure it out slave and then you will wish you'd not lied to me." He growled, stalking from the room. "You will beg me for mercy by the time I'm done with you."

Fenris hissed through his teeth, relaxing his taut muscles in increments after Rilienus left. He didn't understand why the mage couldn't access his lyrium. He doubted Dagna's enchantments were preventing it though it might be the new rune he'd had placed under his skin. A rune he'd not told Dorian about, a rune on the small of his back to further protect him from red lyrium.

A tear rolled down his cheek at the thought of Dorian. He'd failed to protect him and now he'd put his amor at risk by becoming a captive. Dorian would be out of his mind with worry, especially about the red lyrium and he'd been too much of a coward to tell him about the rune. That with it he could never become infected. Infected... maybe Rilienus couldn't access his lyrium because he was already infected with the red? Was that possible? He growled to himself. What did it matter? He couldn't free himself now, never mind protect Dorian.

He was still berating himself when Rilienus returned, followed by five other hooded Venatori. Rilienus smiled again, his eyes still eerily red though not as intense now as when he'd grown angry.

"Seems Pavus has figured out how to track you down so we've had a change of plans. The lyrium in your skin makes you vulnerable to demons slave." Rilienus sneered, enjoying the spark of fear that flashed in his captive's eyes. "Of course, not being a mage keeps you from falling into the Fade. Fortunately, we don't have that problem and we can send you there. Your own personal nightmare to keep you busy while I deal with Dorian's... friends."

"You're over-confident mage." Fenris retorted. "My companions are more formidable than you think."

"I doubt that. But enough talk. Time to send you into the Fade." He said, nodding to one of his companions. "Say goodnight little wolf."

  
  


 


	53. Enchanted Doors

Varric came back while Sera was busy scuffing her feet in the sand, muttering under her breath about stupid mages and even more nug-licking arsey Venatori. The dwarf arched a brow at her, turning his attention to Cullen and Dorian.

"I don't think they came this way." He said, watching as Dorian's eyes grew tight.

"What do you mean they didn't come this way?" Cullen asked, mirroring Dorian's frown.

"Uh, not sure how else to say it Curly but there's nothing ahead but sand. No caves, no hidden paths, not even a random rock to hide under."

"Kaffas." Dorian swore. "I was afraid of this."

"Whasit?" Sera growled, twirling an arrow through her fingers. "You saying they left a false trail? They tricked us?"

"That's exactly what I'm saying."

Cullen groaned, drawing their attention to him. "Perhaps now is a good time to test that sample we found."

"Ugh! Blood magic?" Sera shrieked. "You keep that to yourself Cully-wully."

Cullen frowned, ignoring her as he turned to Dorian. "Can you tell where the magic weakened on this path we've followed?"

Dorian rubbed his temple, his eyes closing against the headache he could feel forming there. "I did sense a change closer to the cave. Why?"

"The sample we found should glow the closer we are to the one who spilled it. It's useless otherwise."

Dorian nodded as though he'd expected Cullen's answer. "Let's go." He said, turning to head back the way they'd come.

Less than an hour later they were outside the cave, Sera standing as far away from them as she could get without losing eye contact. Cullen pulled the vial from his pocket, he, Varric and Dorian breathing a relieved sigh when it started to give off a faint glow.

"Great." Sera shouted. "Back into the creepy cave again."

"Sera!" Cullen admonished, turning to glare at her. "Stop shouting."

Sera made a rude gesture, but squared her shoulders and joined them a moment later, her eyes glued to the vial Cullen held. "That it? That's all it does?"

Cullen resisted the urge to laugh and nodded. "Yes. That's all it does."

"So whatcha all waiting for?" Sera jeered. "Not as if grumpy is gonna get less grumpy the longer we stand around here with our thumbs up our butts."

Varric rolled his eyes, falling in behind Cullen as he led them back into the cave to the back wall and stopped.

"Stupid nug-licking mages." Sera hissed. "More crappy magical shite."

"Dorian?" Cullen whispered, ignoring her.

"Yes. Just a moment." Dorian replied, sending out a wisp of yellow light that impacted the wall to reveal the outline of a door. "Venhedis."

"Trap?" Varric asked in a whisper.

"Yes. Give me a moment. There's a trap and an alarm ward on the other side. We're expected."

Cullen groaned, sliding his sword from it's sheath. "Are we all ready? Sera, Varric see to the traps. I'll try to silence as many as I can once we engage them."

"Ready Curly."

Sera grunted, but gave a slight nod, readying an arrow and a green jar.

"Dorian?"

"I'm ready Commander, and Sera? No bees."

"What?!" She hissed.

Dorian huffed. "There's lyrium beyond this door. Besides that I do not want to be trapped in a cave filled with angry bees."

"Fine. Whatever. Can we kill some Venatori now?"

Dorian gritted his teeth, nodding as he dispelled the wards and swung the hidden door open. "Yes. Let's."

 


	54. Southern Templars

Stepping into the tunnel, they gave a collective groan knowing they had to split up. With a nod from Cullen, he and Sera took the right fork, while Dorian and Varric took the left. It wasn't ideal, but they couldn't afford to tip the Venatori to their presence.

"You all still have your amulets?" Dorian whispered before they separated.

"Yeah." Sera nodded, Cullen and Varric joining her.

"Good. Keep them close and be careful."

Cullen nodded. "Sera and I will join you once we've checked this passage."

Dorian gave him a pained smile and led Varric away. They walked for some time before he felt the pull of the red lyrium increasing. "Lyrium on the other side of this door Varric."

"How do you want to do this Sparkler?"

Dorian closed his eyes, reaching with his magic to get a sense of what waited for them on the other side. "Lyrium is too strong here. I can't tell if there are any Venatori on the other side. If you see anyone, get them with some confusion grenades and I'll try to trap them before they can recover."

Varric nodded, his gaze drifting to Dorian's throat and a smile pulled at the corner of his mouth. "Are you... sparkling?"

Dorian sighed. "You're noticing that now?"

"Just trying to lighten the mood." Varric shrugged, his eyes twinkling. "But I'm happy for you Sparkler. Never seen the elf so happy before. We'll get him back and make these motherless nug-lickers pay."

"Right." Dorian nodded, his chest tight. "Shall we?"

"Right behind you."  
  


\----xxx----

 

Cullen crept down the tunnel, keeping a close eye on Sera as she led them forward. "Any traps Sera?"

Sera snorted, bending down to kneel on the floor. "Not many. And not good ones either." She said, disarming a trap at her feet.

"Can you tell if anyone's been down this path recently?"

She stared at the floor, pacing the width of the tunnel and nodded. "Yeah. Looks like about a half dozen came this way not long ago Cully."

Cullen frowned but let the name she called him slide. "Alright. As soon as you see anyone or can't spot any more traps, let me know and I'll go first."

"Got it."

They hadn't gone far when they heard voices, Cullen slipping ahead of Sera to peer around a bend in the tunnel. There were two hooded figures ahead, bent over a table and studying what looked like an old parchment. He nodded to Sera who was readying her bow and moved forward, trying to get closer before attacking when a third figure stepped out of a recess in the wall and spotted him.

"Now Sera!" He roared, charging ahead and letting out the biggest smite he could manage.

His Templar power knocked the closest two backwards as he brought his sword to bear, slicing into the abdomen of the first. An arrow whizzed past him, burying into the shoulder of the third Venatori while the second one aimed a ball of fire at his face. He ducked behind his shield but still smelled singed hair as he advanced on his target. More arrows sailed past him as he plunged his blade into the Venatori closest to him and looked up to see three more Venatori and sent out another Smite.

Sera's target was down, his body riddled with arrows, blood pooling on the floor as he advanced on the reinforcements. "Take that ya smelly nug-lickers!" Sera cried, smashing a stun grenade into the centre of the group and catching two of them in their upper bodies with more arrows. Cullen roared a battle cry as the third one fell, rushing forward as three more emerged from a small passage near the back of the cave, hands crackling with magic.

 


	55. Fade Time

Dorian and Varric froze when they stepped into the room which was filled with crates of lyrium. "Varric. I think now might be a good time to go find Cullen."

"And leave you here alone? Not a chance Sparkler. The elf will have my head if anything happens to you."

Dorian scowled. "I can handle this Varric. I need Cullen here, now. There's a powerful blood magic spell at work on the other side of that door."

"What about Venatori?"

"I'm not certain, but I think there's only the one. I can't sense much else over the blood magic."

"Shit. Alright I'll go, but promise me you won't do anything stupid while I'm gone."

"So long as no one attacks me, I promise. But you need to hurry. The magic here is very powerful. I need Cullen."

"Got it. Hang tight Sparkler."

Dorian nodded, his eyes riveted to the door on the right as Varric hurried back down the tunnel. What he hadn't told Varric was that he could also sense the pull of lyrium, the same lyrium he recognized from Fenris' tattoo. Whatever was happening in that room, he had to stop it.

He crossed the room and had his hand out to open it when it swung open and the man he'd once believed loved him stepped through. He backed away, horrified by the red glow in Rilienus' eyes and the stench of rot and blood that emanated from him.

"Ah. If it isn't my long lost _amor_." Rilienus smiled, closing the door behind him.

"What have you done Rilienus? Where's Fenris?" He demanded, a fine sheen of sweat forming on his forehead. The man before him was giving off a strange sort of heat, unlike anything he'd felt before. It reminded him of his horror spell, yet Rilienus was not a necromancer.

Rilienus chuckled. "You mean my _delectataio_? I admit he's _libidinosus_ and _inexpectatus_. But really _amor_ , you're _ineptus_ if you believe he feels anything for you. He was quite eager to _cedo_ to me."

Dorian's head was spinning as Rilienus switched back and forth between Common and Tevene. "Fenris would never submit to you unless you gave him no choice." He snarled.

"You're _demens_ Dorian. The _servus_ is completely _ineps_ at the moment. Trapped in his very own personal _incubo_."

"What have you done?" Dorian growled, his temper rising.

"Come now Dorian _._ This is all your fault you know. You did something to him, changed him somehow. I couldn't access his lyrium. Awfully greedy of you to keep him all to yourself."

"I did nothing of the sort."

"Really now _amor_ , don't lie to me. I couldn't even touch him. And the red lyrium I planned to gift him with wouldn't grow. Naturally I couldn't leave him free to attempt escape with you knocking at the door so I was forced to... _contineo_ him."

"You tried to..." Dorian choked on his words. The thought of that red death infecting his amatus... His breath was coming in harsh gasps as he tried to breath past his rising panic.

"Come on Dorian. This is how you thank me? Getting all worked up for a _servus_ , and a _sexualis servus_ at that. I thought you'd be more grateful for rescuing you from these barbaric southerners."

"Stop calling me amor! I am not your amor and never have been. You're completely mad if you think I'm with the Inquisition against my will."

Rilienus sighed, his voice weary. "You do make loving you difficult Dorian."

"You're deluded and mad. You don't love me, you never did. I don't know what's happened to you but it's clear you're beyond saving. Now tell me what you've done to Fenris before I kill you."

"I told you amor. He's trapped in an _incubo_. Ingenious really. His lyrium makes for a very powerful lure for _daemons._ Unfortunately he's not a mage so getting him into the Fade proved challenging, but red lyrium supplied the _explicateo_."

"I've heard enough." Dorian hissed and slammed Rilienus with a wave of force magic that did little more than stun him.

Rilienus' eyes began to glow and Dorian had only enough time to snap a barrier around himself before he was sailing through the air, his back slamming into the far wall. Breath knocked from his lungs, he scrambled to his feet, staff ready as Relienus advanced on him.

"Really now. That's unnecessary." Rilienus drawled, snapping his fingers and sending bolts of electricity through Dorian's body.

Muscles contracting in pain as his barrier weakened under the onslaught of power, he reached for the Fade and sent horrors into Rilienus' mind, forcing him to stagger away. Rilienus snarled, palms outstretched and hit him with a blood magic spell so powerful he fell to his knees in pain. He could feel the taint of red lyrium pulling at him through the blood magic. Feel his life force draining away and knew that without the enchantment he wore, that single spell would have been powerful enough to kill him instantly.

"What sorcery have you done?!" Relienus raged, advancing on him. "You should be dead! The Elder One commands it!"

Dorian arched a brow as he struggled to his feet. "The Elder One? I thought you wanted me to join you Relienus. How could you have done this to yourself?"

"Shut up!" Relienus sneered, snapping his fingers and encasing Dorian's lower body in ice as he closed the distance between them. "How about a _suavium_ Pavus? For old time's sake?"

Dorian shivered, his eyes wide with horror. "Stay away from me Rilienus." Venhedis! Where was Cullen?

"You're right. You're too tainted by that _servus_ filth. A pity. We could have done such wonderful things together." Relienus sighed, raising his hands, crackling with power toward Dorian's face.

"Venatori!" Cullen's voice rang out, a Smite hitting Relienus before he could turn to face the intruder.

Relienus snarled, readying another spell when an arrow pierced his shoulder and he screamed. A second arrow caught him in his left thigh just as he let loose a fireball that forced Dorian's companions to dive away from his attack. With Relienus distracted Dorian snapped his fingers, melting the ice at his feet and sending a crushing prison to descend over his former friend's body.

Relienus snarled, sending a fireball at his head, but his aim was off and it slammed into the wall behind him. Cullen took the opening and hit him with another smite making Relienus stagger back, breath coming in harsh gasps. His eyes were wild with madness as he began filling the room with a rushing wind, drawing them all closer to him.

Cullen smote him again as Dorian hit him with winter's grasp, ending the tempest spell before it could build further as another arrow hit it's mark, piercing Relienus through his right shoulder. Cullen closed the distance, his sword slicing through Relienus' lower abdomen and cutting off the spell he'd been preparing to cast.

"Dorian?" Cullen asked, arching a brow at him in question.

Dorian nodded and Cullen drove his sword through Relienus again, his eyes wide with shock as he crumpled to the ground, his life ebbing away with the blood draining from his body.

"Dorian...?" He croaked, his voice weak as he blinked several times, the red glow retreating from his eyes. "Thank you... and... I'm... sorry." He whispered as his last breath issued past cracked lips.

Dorian felt his chest tighten as Cullen snatched a rag from the ground to wipe his blade clean. He met Dorian's eyes, his face unreadable.

"Are you all right?" He asked, his voice rough from exertion.

"I'm... all right Commander. Did you find them all?

"We got em magey bits." Sera crowed, joining Cullen. "Where's yer grumpy at?"

Dorian's eyes were tight. He didn't know what to tell them about what Relienus had said, afraid to give voice to his suspicions.

"Sparkler?" Varric prompted at the same time Dorian noted he could sense the pull of the Fade coming from the room he'd been trying to reach.

He stared at the closed door as he spoke. "He's behind that door."

"So whatcha waitin for?" Sera demanded. "Get in there and get em."

"It's not that simple Sera. Rilienus..." Dorian paused, eyes tightly closed as he gathered his thoughts. "Relienus said they cast a spell on him. He tried to touch him and couldn't. Then they tried infecting him with red lyrium and when that didn't work, they worked a spell to trap him in the Fade."

"Surely that's not possible." Cullen protested.

"I wouldn't have thought so, but I can feel the pull of the Fade through the door."

"But why Sparkler? Why would they do this?"

"He said I forced his hand. He wanted him contained while he dealt with me. I imagine they were planning to study him to figure out why he's immune to red lyrium."

"Well we ain't solving nothing talking about it."

"No but I don't think you or Varric can help this time. The magic used... it's very powerful and there's more red lyrium in there with him."

"Shit." Varric swore.

Cullen moved past them and placed his hand on the door. "Dorian's right. There's strong magic inside. Are you ready Dorian?"

"No." He sighed as he joined Cullen at the door. "Open it."

  


**_Latin translation_ **

_delectataio_ (entertainment)    _libidinosus_ (sensual)

 _inexpectatus_ (surprising)      _amor_ (love)

 _demens_ (mad)           _cedo_ (submit)

 _ineptus_ (foolish)       _servus_ (slave)

 _ineps_ (helpless)        _incubo_ (nightmare)

 _contineo_ (contain)    _sexualis servus_ (sexual slave)

 _suavium_ (kiss)          _explicataeo_ (answer)

  


 


	56. Fear Demon

Fenris had been fighting demons for as long as he could recall. Each swing of his sword felled another and another only to be replaced by three more. He couldn't remember how he'd gotten here or even where here was.

He sliced his way through a dozen more, sweat dripping from his forehead when a voice broke the silence and his blood froze in his veins.

"Ah my little wolf. Still so very skilled I see."

Fenris turned to stare at the figure of Danarius who smirked at him from the edge of the clearing he stood in.

"You're dead Danarius." He growled. "I ripped your throat out."

Danarius made a disappointed sound in his throat, taking a few steps into the clearing and moving closer. "Yes well, that was unfortunate but now you're here. I've missed you terribly little wolf. Such a good and obedient pet you were."

"Stay away from me Danarius." Fenris growled.

Danarius laughed, ignoring him as he closed the distance further until less than ten feet separated them. "I've no intention of touching you pet. Much as I've missed using your body like the tool I designed it to be, I have another purpose in mind."

Fenris scowled and took a step back, not liking the glint in Danarius' eyes or the smile that twisted his lips. "I'll kill you here as well Danarius. You'll do nothing but die."

The former Magister chuckled and flicked his wrist, trapping Fenris in a light static cage. Fenris growled and fought the magic holding him, furious he hadn't just cut Danarius down the moment he'd spoken.

"No I don't think you will. Your new master is a necromancer. With your lyrium and his magic... well, death isn't as permanent as most like to believe."

Fenris felt his blood go cold. "Leave him out of this Danarius." He hissed. "Leave him alone. It's me you want, you have me."

"Really pet. I expected you to know me better than that. Why would i want you when I can use him to live again? You're already here. I have no doubt he will follow in some heroic effort to free you. All I have to do is wait."

"I will not let you have him Danarius! I'll kill you first!"

"Oh hush Fenris." Danarius sighed, waving a hand at him. "Time for a nap I think."

Fenris' vision went black and he struggled against the invisible tendrils of magic that held him immobile. When he could see again, he was in a clearing and couldn't remember how he'd gotten there. Danarius' laughter rang in his head, his chest tight with pain that the Magister's ghost could somehow hurt Dorian. He scowled at that and stalked forward through a stand of trees. He had to find and kill Danarius. He knew the Magister had threatened to hurt Dorian, but the details of what he'd said were lost. He had to stop Danarius before Dorian found him, he would not let that monster hurt his amatus.

\----xxx----

Dorian followed Cullen into the room, Sera and Varric hanging back while they looked inside. Dorian sucked in a breath at what he saw. Fenris was standing in the centre of the room. His cauldrons had been removed but he was still dressed in his leathers. He held his sword out and to the side, his eyes wide and flicking from side to side. He was breathing hard as though he'd just been in a battle, but didn't react to their presence.

Along the walls were more crates filled with mined lyrium, enough that it seemed to make the far wall glow red. "Vishante kaffas!" Dorian swore and Fenris turned to him, sword raised. "Venhedis." He added more softly and Fenris lowered his sword. Dorian motioned for Cullen to step out of the room and followed, swearing under his breath.

"I assume this is bad." Cullen muttered. "You seem to recognize whatever that is in there."

Dorian grunted, closing his eyes against the headache forming behind them. "Only in textbooks Commander."

"How do we help him?" Cullen asked.

"What's happening?" Sera frowned, joining them.

"Something dangerous is my guess." Varric murmured.

"I'll have to... contain him a moment while the rest of you get that lyrium out of the room. It's feeding the spell, strengthening it." Dorian sighed.

"What do you mean, contain him?"

"Freeze him in place? Stun him? I don't know Cullen. But I have to immobile him to make it safe for you to get the lyrium out. He can't see us, but he's reacting to our presence which means he can hear us but doesn't recognize our voices."

"What?? You mean grumpy might kill one of us if we make too much noise?" Sera exclaimed.

Dorian nodded.

"But why?" She persisted.

"It's a nightmare Sera. He's seeing his fears. It's the nature of the spell Relienus cast on him to keep him from trying to escape."

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but if the mage who cast the blood magic spell is now dead, shouldn't the spell be broken?" Varric wondered.

"Normally yes, but Rilienus was infected with red lyrium. It's not going to dissipate. I'll have to enter the Fade to break it's hold on him."

"Which means this is going to be very dangerous." Cullen sighed.

"Yes." Dorian sighed.

"Let's get to it then."

They returned to the room, Dorian wincing as he cast winter's grasp on Fenris freezing him in place. Cullen and the two rogues moved through the room, taking the crates of lyrium out and returning for more until they were all gone.

"Now what?" Varric grunted, staring at Fenris who stared through them, his mouth set in a grim line.

"Now the two of you leave and Cullen helps me reach Fenris."

"Shit." Varric huffed. "Come on Buttercup. Let's pile those crates somewhere we can bury them under a lot of rocks when we're done here."

"Fine."

Cullen waited until they left before fixing Dorian with a hard stare. "It's not as simple as you told them is it?"

"No." Dorian admitted. "I need your help with this. You'll have to restrain him when he comes back from the Fade. Physically, he's mostly here, but not all. When I bring that part out, he won't be able to tell right away what's real and what's not. He'll probably attack me. I can counter that a little with a haste spell, but..."

"But the odds are high he'll hurt you before he knows what's happened."

Dorian nodded.

"Is there no other way?"

"No. Just... if the worst happens... please don't let him think any of it is his fault."

Cullen's eyes went wide as Dorian's words sunk in. "You think he's going to kill you. No Dorian. You can't think this is a good plan and he wouldn't either."

"It doesn't matter. I can't leave him like this, he'll die."

"So you'll sacrifice yourself instead?"

Dorian scowled at him. "He wouldn't even be here if not for me."

Fenris growled behind them, drawing their attention as the ice around the elf's legs began melting fast.

"We're out of time Commander. This is what's going to happen. I'm going to enter the Fade and remove the magical links holding him there. When I come back, I'll cast haste. All you need do is grab him from behind before he can reach me all right? Don't touch him before that or he'll attack you."

"I don't like this plan Dorian." Cullen grumbled.

"Noted. But I have to be close to him to find the links in the Fade. It's the only way."

"Fine. I'll be ready."

"Good."

 


	57. Ilusions and Reality

"Ah Fenris." Danarius smiled. "So good of you to return now. You have perfect timing as always."

Fenris heart was in his throat at what he saw. Danarius stood behind Dorian who's eyes were drifting closed. "Soon my little wolf, my talented pet, I will return to the mortal world. You will die here and your new master will be the vessel for my resurrection. My deeds will be celebrated in the Imperium and with all those accolades I'll be able to create a new pet."

"No!" Fenris cried, sword raised as Dorian's face blurred a moment and Danarius disappeared. The glint of his former master's cold eyes stared back at him, framed in Dorian's beautiful face and he felt something inside him break.

The clearing shimmered at the edges of his vision as it faded and disappeared, to be replaced with a hard cave wall. A wave of dizziness washed through him, his eyes settling on the figure before him, Danarius' eyes staring coldly back. "You will not have him Danarius." He hissed, his sword sliding forward and slicing through the Magister's left shoulder.

"No!" Shouted a voice behind him, strong arms grabbing him around the waist to stop his forward movement. "Fenris, stop!"

He blinked, staring at the figure before him. Dorian's eyes stared back, relief in his eyes as his knees buckled and he sank to the floor, blood staining the front of his robe. "Amatus..." He whispered as Fenris' sword slipped from his numb fingers

"Dorian?" He stammered, blinking to clear his muddied thoughts.

"Love when you say my name." Dorian sighed, his eyes drifting closed.

"Dorian?" Fenris repeated, fear clutching his heart as he wrenched free of the arms holding him, rushing to Dorian's side in time to catch him before his head hit the floor. "Amatus! Amatus... no, what have I done?!"

"It's not your fault Fenris." He heard someone say. "Here. Some health potions."

Fenris blinked up at Cullen, dazed by what had just happened, but allowed Cullen to tip a vial of elfroot potion to Dorian's lips. "We need to get him back to camp and away from this red lyrium."

Fenris nodded, still unsure of everything but the unconscious man in his arms. Cullen exposed the wound Fenris had inflicted on his love, saying nothing as he spread a second potion over the gash to stop the bleeding.

"Come on. We'll head back to camp and I'll explain everything there."

Fenris grunted, getting to his feet and following him from the room, Dorian cradled to his chest. Varric and Sera smiled up at him, but they were subdued as they followed Cullen out of the cave.

  
  


\----xxx----

  
  


They made their way back to their camp in silence, none of them much interested in discussing what they'd found in the cave or the lack of nefarious plans. The fact that the whole thing had been the result of some delusional mage from Dorian's past, his mind poisoned by red lyrium was not the sort of thing either Sera or Varric found humorous.

Lost in their thoughts, tired and worried for Dorian, the bark of startled surprise Cullen gave had all but Fenris jumping in fright.

"Andraste's tits Cully! Don't do that!" Sera swore.

"Curly?"

To which Cullen ignored them both and continued on to their camp. "Lady Vivienne. I wasn't expecting to see you here." He said, making Varric and Sera stare at in each other in confusion.

"Iron Lady?" Varric whispered.

"Big britches." Sera hissed.

Fenris turned to glare at them both, shifting his weight as Dorian shivered in his arms. "Quiet, both of you." He hissed, following Cullen.

"Well of course not darling. We didn't exactly have time to send a notice ahead of my arrival." She said, her gaze drifting to the elf standing behind him. "Ah. And here is my patient now. Fenris, we haven't spoken much, but if you would be so kind as to put your dear Dorian on the cot inside, we can begin healing him."

Fenris nodded, moving past her and Cullen as he ducked inside the tent and laid Dorian on the cot inside. Vivienne followed, silent on his heels, tutting at the blood staining Dorian's shawl and armour.

"Terrible mess." She huffed. "If you could help me remove his shawl and upper armour I would be most grateful darling. I need to see his injury to heal it properly."

Fenris grunted, settling Dorian against his chest as he unbuckled the shawl, Vivienne taking it from him and setting it aside. With nimble fingers, he undid the buckles and fasteners holding Dorian's bracers and upper armour in place. Dorian's skin was cool under his touch and he flinched at that, knowing it was his fault.

"There we are." Vivienne hummed, a faint smile on her lips. "Lay him down and I'll get to work."

Fenris did as she asked, sliding out from behind Dorian and laying his head gently against the small pillow there. He stood back from Vivienne as healing magic poured forth from her hands, healing the garish sword wound and returning colour to Dorian's cheeks.

"There. All better now, though he will need a dose of lyrium when he wakes." She said, turning to look at him, a puzzled expression on her face. "Now, let me have a look at you. I promise I'll do nothing you don't agree with darling."

Fenris frowned but let her approach, her brow furrowed in puzzlement. "There's something different about you Fenris." She said. "Did the Venatori do something to you? Expose you to red lyrium? Blood magic? Bind you in some way?"

Fenris blinked, frowning at her. "They tried to infect me with red lyrium but it didn't work. They then used magic to send part of me into the fade, or so I think. What I saw was a nightmare, but I cannot say if I was truly in the Fade or some trick of my mind."

"Did you face demons?"

"Yes. Several."

"I see. None of that explains the change I sense in you. It seems to be coming from your lyrium."

"What are you talking about? What change?"

"I'd heard Dagna was working on some enchantments against red lyrium. What did she do for you?"

Fenris scowled. "She gave me a tattoo."

"Hmmm." Vivienne hummed. "Would you permit me to test a theory? I suspect this tattoo has done more than just protect you from red lyrium."

"What test?" He growled.

"You former... master... did this experiment to produce a portable source of lyrium did he not?"

Fenris nodded.

"Well my dear, I suspect that is no longer the case."

"What?!"

"If I may demonstrate?" She asked, raising a palm to his chest.

"All right." Fenris said, bracing for the touch of her magic and the pull of lyrium in his skin.

At his nod, her palm began to glow and a thin tendril of golden orange light flicked out toward him. It was slow and measured, a testament to Vivienne's control but when it reached him nothing happened. He frowned as a small smile played across the Enchanter's lips. She added a second hand as if determined to prove her point with the same result. He felt nothing and returned her smirk with a frown of confusion.

"I don't understand." He said as she lowered her hands back to her sides.

"Neither do I my dear, but I have a theory. If you wouldn't mind indulging me, I would like to test it."

Still confused but curious about how Dagna's rune might have changed him, he nodded as she directed him back to Dorian's side. "I understand this might be unsettling, but I want you to place your hands on his chest and will the lyrium into Dorian's body."

Fenris flinched, scowling harder at the noblewoman, his lips pulled back in a sneer. "You mean feed him lyrium like a mage sends healing into wounds? You can't be serious."

"I am deadly serious Fenris. Besides, what can it hurt to find out, especially since you already think me wrong."

Fenris grunted, ignoring her even as he placed his hands on Dorian's chest. Though his wounds were healed, he had yet to waken and his skin was still chilled. Shrugging off his overwhelming guilt over how Dorian had come to be this way, he focused on sending lyrium into his lover's body.

He flinched again when his markings flared but didn't activate his ghost ability. Instead, blue light flowed effortlessly through his palms and he could feel when it made contact with Dorian's mana source. He flushed at the sensation, an odd discomfort rising in him as he felt his intimate his actions were.

A moment later, the lyrium stopped flowing and he became aware that Dorian's skin had begun to warm and his breathing had graduated into soft sighs of contentment. He drew his hands back, still shaken by what had happened even as he marvelled at what this now meant.

"It's as I suspected." Vivienne murmured, startling him as he'd forgotten she was still there.

"How? How is this possible?"

Vivienne tsked at him making him feel like an addled child. "I do not know. Perhaps our dwarven Enchanter can explain it to you, or perhaps it is an unexpected side effect to what she was trying to accomplish. At any rate, you no longer need fear being controlled by a mage short on mana."

Fenris said nothing to that, his mind whirling at the implication that he could now offer power to a mage rather than have it taken from him against his will.

Dorian shifted in the cot, the movement drawing his eyes down to his lover while Vivienne murmured a goodbye and left. He grunted at her, not paying attention as Dorian's eyes fluttered open, his gaze filling with relief and sadness as he locked eyes with him.

"Fen?" He croaked, his voice weak. "Is that really you or have I died and this is the Fade?"

Fenris' throat closed up, his own relief at having Dorian awake overwhelming him as he brought a cup of water to Dorian's lips. "Drink mage." He grunted past the lump in his throat.

"Bossy." Dorian grunted, accepting Fenris' help with getting the water past his lips. With a sigh he let his head fall back to the pillow, exhaustion pulling at his eyes. He reached a hand out to Fenris and took hold of his hand, twining their fingers together and tugging him closer.

"I take it this is real then and we're back at camp?"

"It's real my mage." He whispered, his heart hammering in his chest.

Dorian frowned and tugged harder. "Amatus... kiss me? I hate to say this but I'm too weak to manage it on my own."

A tear rolled down Fenris' cheek as he bent closer, pressing his lips to Dorian's and drawing a soft whimper from his throat. Dorian's free hand clutched at the back of his head and held him close.

"Amatus. It's all right." He murmured as Fenris buried his face in the hollow of Dorian's neck. "I'm here, I'm safe... you're safe. It's a miracle really, not a time for tears."

Fenris sighed a deep breath and righted himself, Dorian's hand still clutching his, the other coming to rest on his arm as he moved out of his embrace.

"I... almost killed you." He whispered, his eyes staring at their linked hands.

Dorian held tighter, drawing his eyes back to his. "I know amatus. I knew it was a possibility as soon as I understood how the spell used on you worked. It's why I had Cullen there to hold you back. I assume my plan worked then since I'm still here."

Fenris frowned down at him. "You knew you could die by my hand and you still went through with it?

"Of course I did. I had to get you out amatus or you would have died of exhaustion. You would have been trapped in that nightmare until your heart gave out."

"But..."

Dorian sighed. "Amatus. They targeted you because of me. Do you honestly believe I wouldn't risk everything to save you?"

"No."

"Also, Relienus told me what he tried to do to you and I was terrified I was already too late. He said he tried to touch you and couldn't and then he tried to infect you with red lyrium. He said that didn't work either, which I didn't believe until I saw you in that room. Why didn't it work Fen?

Fenris looked away, guilt clawing at him. "I'm not certain, but it might be due to the tattoo Dagna gave me.

Dorian's eyes widened. "Tattoo? What tattoo? What are you talking about?"

Fenris' felt heat in his cheeks. "It couldn't be helped."

"What?! You let Dagna carve you up more? And you didn't tell me?" Dorian's voice faltered and Fenris winced at the hurt he heard in it.

"I'm sorry Dorian. I... didn't want to worry you."

"Worry me? You had more magic added to your body and didn't think it important to tell me about it?" Dorian released his hand and stared up at the roof of the tent. "I assume whatever your goal was it was successful then."

"I believe so. Yes."

"I see."

"Dorian..."

"I think I need to be alone for a while amatus. I'm very tired." Dorian said, drawing his blanket up to his chin and turning to his side. "We can talk more later."

"Dorian... love, I'm sorry."

"Yes. I got that part. Goodnight Fenris."

"Mage..." Fenris pleaded, but Dorian ignored him and refused to answer. With a heavy sigh, Fenris left the tent and joined the others by the fire. He knew he'd screwed up again but there'd been no easy way to tell Dorian about the tattoo. Especially since it had been his idea and had to convince Dagna to go through with it. How could he have said anything after all the pain he'd suffered when he'd first received the marks? How could he have possibly justified enduring more pain on purpose?

"Copper for your thoughts elf?" Varric asked from across the fire.

"They're not worth a copper Varric." He retorted, his eyes riveted to the flames.

Varric snorted. "They gotta be worth at least half a copper for your face to look like that. What's the problem? Sparkler still asleep?"

"He needed to rest. He'll be fine."

Varric arched a brow and took a seat beside him. "And you're not in there because why? You feel guilty you got kidnapped? We all know Sparkles doesn't blame you for that. If anything he blames himself for making you a target."

"I almost killed him Varric."

"See, right there is the problem. You almost did, but you didn't because Cullen was there to stop that from happening. And it wasn't your fault elf. You know it wasn't so stop torturing yourself. Here, have a drink." Varric added, handing him a mug.

"What is it?"

"Whisky. Most portable alcohol in Thedas."

 


	58. Stumbling

Dorian stared at the side of the tent after Fenris left. He wasn't completely clear on why he was so upset with him. He should be relieved, happy his amatus was safe. Not only rescued but protected from the effects of red lyrium. More than protected based on how guilty he'd looked when he mentioned the tattoo.   
  
He frowned at that. There was no way Dagna could have created a lyrium tattoo. It wasn't possible. No matter her extensive skill with creating enchantments, only a blood mage could have pulled it off and the pain involved would have alerted all of Skyhold. Which meant something else had to have been used.  
  
Growling, he tried to sit up, wincing at the pain in his shoulder and the fatigue pulling at his body. He swung his legs over the side of the cot and waited for the wave of dizziness to pass. Sitting idle while filled with anxiety over what Fenris had kept from him only increased his tension. He needed to walk, to clear his head.  
  
Gritting his teeth at the protest in his muscles, he forced himself to stand. His breath came in short gasps as he breathed through the lingering pain of his injuries. He'd managed three steps toward the tent opening when a pair of feet appeared before him. Raising his head, he stared into the worried gaze of his amatus. Arms crossed and looking both annoyed and miserable, he stood there silently waiting for Dorian to acknowledge him.  
  
"I'd ask what you think you're doing, but I'm not in the mood to trade barbs with you. Where are you planning to go?"  
  
"I need some air." Dorian retorted.  
  
"Alright but I'm helping you and it's not up for debate."  
  
"You're impossible." Dorian grunted. "Fine. Help then, but that doesn't mean I'm not still mad at you."  
  
Fenris snorted, crossing the room to his side and slipping an arm around his waist. "As if that was in doubt."  
  
"Stop talking amatus." He grunted as they slipped outside into a night filled with stars. A quick glance at the fire let him know everyone else had retired for the evening and suddenly a walk seemed like too much work.  
  
Fenris tensed at his side, aware of his hesitation. "What's wrong? Do you need to stop?"  
  
Dorian's resolve slipped, his chest constricting with the swell of emotion Fenris' concern elicited. "No. I changed my mind. I think I'd rather just sit by the fire instead."  
  
He felt Fenris frown at him but he said nothing, leading him to a bench the soldiers had set up. He settled with a wince and a muffled groan, Fenris tensing at the sound but let him go, seating himself a short distance away. He frowned at that, aware that his behaviour was what had prompted the elven warrior's hesitation.  
  
"Would you like a drink?" Fenris asked and Dorian cringed again, hating the insecurity he heard in his amatus' voice.  
  
"Stop that amatus."  
  
"Stop what?"  
  
"You don't have to be afraid Fenris. I'm upset, not angry. I'm not going to hurt you so stop acting like I'm about to break your heart."  
  
"It's what I deserve." Fenris replied. "I almost killed you and I kept something from you."  
  
Dorian's muscles groaned in protest as he stood and crossed to the warrior, settling at his feet despite the strain. He held Fenris' gaze as he reached up to caress his cheek. "I asked you to stop that amatus. I might be upset about the tattoo, but it will never change how I feel about you. The Venatori business was because of me, not you. Please don't feel guilty about that."  
  
"Dorian." Fenris sighed, his eyes bright as he fought to hold in his tears. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I just... I didn't want you to worry."  
  
Dorian closed the distance between them and pressed a tender kiss to Fenris' lips. "I know you didn't and I know you're new to this whole relationship thing, as am I. But nothing will ever change how I feel about you."  
  
Fenris smiled and captured his mouth in a heated kiss, pulling him up to sit beside him on the bench, his arm snaking around Dorian's waist and settling them both. "There is nowhere I want to be more than at your side."  
  
"Well good because I don't plan to go anywhere without you. Now, how about you get us that drink you mentioned and you can tell me about this tattoo?"  
  
\----xxx----  
  
"So you don't know what Dagna used then?"  
  
"No. I didn't ask. Not because I didn't want to, but she knows her enchantments and the ones she fused into my armour worked as she said they would. Also, I don't know enough about it to understand anything she might have told me."  
  
Dorian hummed thoughtfully. "Rilienus said he tried to touch you and couldn't. What happened?"  
  
"I'm not sure. He was going to strike me and at the last minute stopped as though he'd hit an invisible barrier. Later he tried to access the lyrium in my skin and became enraged when he couldn't reach it, though he said he could still sense it."  
  
"How odd. I think we need to talk to Dagna about this."  
  
"There's more."  
  
Dorian arched a brow. "More? More what?"  
  
"Vivienne had a theory. It seems no mage can affect the lyrium in my skin now. But I can direct it to one. "  
  
"What?! But that's... incredible. Truly? No mage can take it from you by force?"  
  
"It would seem so. You may test it if you like."  
  
Dorian looked horrified at the suggestion. "I would never do that Fenris."  
  
Fenris grinned. "I know amatus, but I also know you're insatiably curious. Just try it."  
  
"Fine." Dorian shifted away from him and put a hand up, palm facing outward as he directed his magic to reach for Fenris. A tendril of blue and purple swirling light stretched out from his fingertips and attempted to access the lyrium. Dorian grunted in surprise when he felt his magic hit a barrier for which he could find no seam. "Fascinating." He whispered. "Though I'm not entirely certain this is a good thing, I'm relieved enemy mage's can no longer hurt you through your markings."  
  
"Why wouldn't it be good?"  
  
"I'm not trying to diminish this marvel Fenris but there's so much we don't know about your tattoos. We do know lyrium is dangerous in high doses and yours is under your skin. What if you're meant to release lyrium regularly for your own safety?"  
  
"I can. If I wish to supply a mage with lyrium, I can do that now."  
  
"You're not serious."  
  
Fenris sighed. "Give me your hand love. I'll show you."  
  
Dorian did as Fenris asked but his eyes were still filled with concern when a small rush of lyrium hit his system. He gasped at the sensation, his hand tingling where Fenris held it as a warm flush infused his entire body. A strange euphoria came over him and he didn't notice when he let go and slipped off the bench to the ground. His thoughts were swimming in a pleasant haze when Fenris' face loomed in front of him. He smiled and put his hand to the warrior's cheek, feeling giddy.  
  
"Dorian, are you all right? Talk to me."  
  
Giggling, he could feel how boneless and relaxed he was and knew in the distant part of his mind it had been too much. "I'm fine amatus..." He slurred, frowning at the sound of his own voice. "But I think that might have been too much."  
  
"Venhedis." Fenris swore, stooping to help him to his feet. "My apologies, but I think I've made you drunk on lyrium."  
  
Dorian giggled again as he swayed on his feet, breaking into full-blown laughter as Fenris picked him up and headed for their tent. "Oh amatus, I've often fantasized about being swept off my feet, but somehow this wasn't how I pictured it. Imagine if Varric saw us now? Or Maker forbid, Cullen. They'd laugh themselves silly. Not to mention never let me forget it. Perhaps you should put me down before someone sees?"  
  
Fenris grunted as he ducked inside the tent and set him down on their shared cot. "Hush amatus. Drink this." He said, handing him a healing potion. "It will take the edge off and help you sleep."  
  
"Sleep? I can't possibly sleep now." He protested as he downed the potion in a single gulp. "Why, I feel I could take on a High Dragon single-handed at the moment."  
  
"It will pass. Now help me get you out of your clothes. An overdose like that is going to make you hot."  
  
"You just want me naked, you wicked, wicked thing." Dorian teased, tugging at his tunic and getting it stuck when he forgot to undo the cuffs at his sleeves.   
  
Fenris sighed, pinning Dorian's arns down as he undid the cuffs and tugged the tunic over his head. "Sit still while I remove your boots."  
  
Dorian slumped backward, his head falling to the pillow with a muffled thump. "Mmm. I haven't had anyone remove my boots for a long tine. Funny what you remember at the most bizarre times."  
  
"I know what you mean." Fenris murmured as he tugged Dorian's breeches off and tossed them in the corner. "Shift over and I'll lie beside you."  
  
"Mmpgf." Dorian grubted, his eyes closing as Fenris shifted his unresponsive form to the side of the cot. He settled in beside him, pulling Dorian close as he was fearful he might roll off the cot onto the floor in his current state. "Mmm. This is nice." He murmured, snuggling into Fenris' side. "Mmm. Amatus I love you so much. I never thought this would ever happen to me. Feels like a dream sometimes."  
  
"I feel the same." Fenris whispered into his lover's hair. "Sleep my mage or you won't be so pleased with me come morning."  
  
Dorian giggled again, his chuckle vibrating on Fenris' chest. "I'm always thankful for my beautiful warrior." He murmured. "Even when he's infuriating."  
  
Fenris huffed and smiled against Dorian's hair, saying nothing as his love's breathing evened out and he began to snore softly. He had no idea what he'd done to deserve a man like Dorian. If ever something else came up where he didn't know how to handle it, he would do his best to remember to ask for advice. Dorian deserved better and he would do whatever he could to improve on that.

 


	59. Suspicions and Delight

A few days later, they were back in Skyhold where the Inquisition forces were preparing to head to the Arbour Wilds. Cullen vanished from their small group as soon as they returned, readying the soldiers and other things needed to ensure Corypheus' forces didn't beat them to the ancient elven temple, which Morrigan asserted was his goal.  
  
Fenris had avoided Morrigan as much as possible when she'd first arrived, remembering the encounter on Sundermount with her mother, Flemeth. He didn't trust the witch, but her motives and schemes were far easier to discern than that of the elven apostate, Solas.   
  
Since their brief conversation during the one time they'd been in the field together, he'd avoided the mage. It wasn't because he was a mage or because he looked at him with pity or disdain. It was all those things together, but also ever since he'd met the man, Solas had rubbed him the wrong way.  
  
At present Solas was in the herb garden, tending to the Inquisition plants with a focus unlike anything Fenris had seen. The elf had caught his attention as he'd left his and Dorian's now shared quarters for the simple fact of him being out of the rotunda and away from his murals. That had been odd all in itself, but the focus was out of place as well, as though he was trying too hard to seem absorbed in his task.  
  
In scanning the other occupants of the garden, he could see Morrigan deep in conversation with the Inquisitor. Every time Morrigan spoke, Solas paused in his work as though straining to catch every syllable that fell from the witch's lips. The other odd thing was that the elven mage seemed completely unaware he was being observed. Which was not normal. Solas had always had the uncanny abilty among those in the inner circle to know when someone was watching him, but it was clear he had no idea he was being watched now.  
  
Fenris frowned at the elf, lost in thought as he attempted to puzzle out what it meant when Dorian slipped his arms around his waist and pressed a gentle kiss to his neck. "What are you doing amatus? You seem very intent on whatever it is that has your attention."  
  
Fenris grunted, now curious to see if Solas would notice him if he shared his thoughts with Dorian. "I'm watching the elf."  
  
"Elf?" He asked, peering into the garden. "Oh. You mean our resident apostate elf who likes to dress like an unwashed hobo."  
  
Fenris chuckled, keeping his voice low. "An apt description."  
  
"Mmm. May I ask why you're watching him?"  
  
"I'm not sure yet." He murmured as Solas glanced up and caught him staring. He gave a small nod of acknowledgment, noting the frown that briefly lit Solas' face before he stepped away from the plants and out of Fenris' line of sight.  
  
"Amatus? What is it?"  
  
"Let's find somewhere private where we can talk."  
  
Dorian frowned. "Our quarters are private."  
  
Fenris shook his head. "No, I'd prefer to discuss this... elsewhere."  
  
"You're acting very odd amatus." Dorian huffed. "But very well. How about a picnic?"  
  
Fenris arched a brow at him. "Picnic? Now?"  
  
"Yes. Why not? Until Cullen has his soldiers ready to march and Leliana sends her agents out, there isn't much we need to be doing. Plus, if it's privacy you want, what better way to get it than to get out of Skyhold for a few hours?"  
  
Fenris smiled, turning in Dorian's arms to press a kiss to his lips. "Lead the way then love."

\----xxx----

An hour later they were seated by a small stream, a blanket laid out for them to sit on and a small basket of food, open and waiting. Fenris had slipped back to their room to grab a bottle of Agreggio and presented it to Dorian, smiling in pleasure at Dorian's sigh of approval.  
  
"Amatus, you are a treasure beyond words." Dorian smiled, breathing in the spicy and delectable scent before taking a sip. "Now. Tell me about Solas. What about him has so captured your interest? It can't be his sense of fashion or his attitude. Unless of course you actually enjoy his arrogance."  
  
"Bite your tongue love." Fenris replied. "No, it's nothing like that. I've never seen him spend much of any time outside his little room with the paintings. And he seemed overly engrossed in the herb garden."  
  
"You're a critic of gardening now?" Dorian teased.  
  
"Mage."  
  
"Fine, fine. I'll stop teasing. So what then? I didn't think you had much to do with Solas."  
  
"I don't. He's arrogant and secretive and something about him doesn't sit well with me. What do you know about him?"  
  
"Only that he's more fascinated with spirits of the Fade than real people. He also doesn't think much of elves."  
  
"What?"  
  
"It's true. I overheard him having a conversation with the Inquisitor. Did you know that vallaslin doesn't mean what the Dalish think it does?"  
  
Fenris frowned. "It wouldn't surprise me they got the history wrong, but what does it mean?"  
  
"Solas said it was used as a mark of slavery. An elven slave to an elven Master."  
  
Fenris snorted. "It sounds more accurate than what the Dalish say it means. Given how Solas talks to people and ignores me, I can easily picture him owning his own slaves."  
  
Dorian coughed, his eyes wide with shock. "You don't really think Solas could be that old do you? It would make him one of the elvhen. Perhaps even one of their gods."  
  
Fenris was silent a moment as he tossed the remains of his apple core into the river. "I don't know. But now that I've voiced it aloud, it's not as crazy as I first thought."  
  
"That's a little disturbing amatus. If it's true, why would he have joined the Inquisition? An elven god assisting a heretical offshoot of the Chantry. Why would he bother?"  
  
"Hasn't he always asserted that the orb Corypheus used was of ancient elvhen origin?"  
  
"He has. But so what? He also said he'd seen them in old dreams. I've seen them myself in wall paintings in Minrathous. Knowledge doesn't make someone guilty of anything."  
  
"But what if it's not just knowledge amatus? What if he knows what that orb is because he gave it to Corypheus?"  
  
"I don't like where you're going with this." Dorian grumbled. "It would explain a lot of his motivation but it also makes him dangerous. What purpose would he have for helping stop Corypheus?"  
  
"Perhaps he's waiting for an opportunity to retrieve what he lost."  
  
"But that would mean he had a plan before Corypheus destroyed the Temple in Haven. And that  for whatever reason, giving Corypheus that orb backfired somehow."  
  
"What has he said about the orb? Does he know what it is?"  
  
"He said it was a foci." At Fenris' frown, he continued. "A source of magic focus and power."  
  
"So it contains magic then?"  
  
"Based on the size of the explosion that destroyed the Temple, I'd say it holds very powerful magic, maybe more than that. I might even go so far as to say it functions as a direct link to the Fade."  
  
"Venhedis." Fenris swore. "What would Solas need that kind of power for? And why give it to Corypheus?"  
  
"Those are both excellent questions amatus, but I think we should save our speculations for another time. Even if Solas is hiding something this big, we have nothing to prove any of it."  
  
"I suppose. But I think it a mistake not to share our suspicions with the Inquisition."  
  
"I didn't say we wouldn't."  
  
Fenris sighed, moving to Dorian's side to place a kiss to his lips. "I know you didn't, I just can't shake the feeling this is something we can't ignore."  
  
"Wearen't going to ignore it amatus." Dorian whispered against his lips. "We're just setting it aside for a while to pursue more pleasant things." He added, slipping his hands to the bottom edge of Fenris' tunic and pulling it off him.  
  
"Most pleasant." Fenris growled, his fingers deftly undoing the laces of Dorian's breeches as he nuzzled his neck, drawing a moan from his lover. "You're not still angry with me?" He asked, kissing his way down Dorian's torso the moment he'd removed his tunic.  
  
"No, but I'm sure you know how to make it up to me amatus." Dorian whispered breathlessly as Fenris continued kissing his way down his skin.  
  
"Perhaps." Fenris chuckled, letting his breath raise gooseflesh on Dorian's abdomen. He glanced up the taut muscles of Dorian's stomach, his breath halting at the sight of his love's head thrown back and his lips parted with lust. With a smile, he took Dorian's length in his mouth, sucking and licking his way down his shaft, drawing whimpering gasps from his lover's lips.  
  
"Oh! Amatus..." Dorian moaned, his hips thrusting up as Fenris placed a restraining hand to his hip to keep him still. "Please don't tease me. I want... I want you inside me."  
  
Fenris hummed his agreement around Dorian's shaft, his own cock twitching in response to the desire and need in his lover's voice. "Mmm. You're sure?"  
  
Dorian groaned as Fenris increased the suction on the head of Dorian's cock, swirling his tongue and flicking it over the slit. "Amatus..." Dorain growled. "Please, it's been too long."  
  
Fenris hummed his agreement, letting his cock go with a wet pop. He rocked back on his heels and grabbed the vial of oil from his discarded breeches and poured some over his hand to press two slick digits to Dorian's entrance. His cock twitched when Dorian spread his legs wider in invitation. "Are you ready love?" He asked, his voice heavy with need.  
  
"Please amatus... no more teasing. I need you."  
  
Fenris sucked in a breath, slicking the oil over his hard length. He dragged Dorian's hips over his thighs to get abetter angle and thrust forward. Dorian's muscles contracted, his abdomen taut as Fenris sheathed himself inside. "Maker, love...you're so ready for me."  
  
"Ungh." Dorian moaned in response, his abdomen tightening in an attempt to impale himself further. "Amatus..."  
  
Fenris grunted and bent down to capture Dorian's mouth in a heady kiss, trapping Dorian beneath him, the mage's hard cock twitching against his abdomen as he lost himself in plundering his lover's mouth.  
  
"Move amatus, please..." Dorain moaned, writhing beneath him, seeking friction.   
  
Fenris obliged him, sliding himself out and back into Dorian's body at a gentle pace.  
  
"Fenris, if you don't start moving I'm going to get very cross." Dorian growled, rocking his hips into the warrior's leisurely thrusts.  
  
Fenris smirked down at him. "What might that look like?" He teased, continuing his slow slide into Dorian's body..  
  
He glared up at him as a sheen of sweat beaded down his forehead. "I don't know yet, but I'll think of something."  
  
"Promise?"  
  
Dorian huffed at him, dragging him down for a kiss and nipping at Fenris' bottom lip. "No it's a threat, you infuriating... ungh!" He broke off as Fenris began thrusting in earnest, watching how Dorian's eyes lost focus, his lips parting as his breathing became more laboured with every snap of his hips. The sight of his beautiful mage come undone beneath him had his heart thrumming and his thrusts more desperate as he chased his orgasm in the heat of Dorian's body.  
  
Feeling the building pressure in his groin, he adjusted his position, freeing his right arm to take Dorian's cock in his hand. The mage bucked his hips into his touch and a few strokes later shot his release all over himself and Fenris' palm. Dorian's muscles tightened around his cock and then he was riding out his own orgasm, gasping Dorian's name as his world narrowed to the blinding orgasm his amatus drew from him.  
  
He collapsed to Dorian's side, breath coming in short gasps as he rode out the waves of pleasure coursing through him, his muscles twitching their own release.  
  
"Now that was a picnic to remember." Dorian sighed next to him.  
  
"Mage." Fenris rumbled, still riding the pleasure in his system.  
  
"Do you really want me to follow through on my threat earlier?" Dorian continued, ignoring him.  
  
"Depends what you had in mind." Fenris replied, shifting to rest his cheek on Dorian's chest. The mage put his arm around him, holding him close as he drew his fingers through Fenris' hair, a tenderness Fenris found deeply soothing." Mmm. Why do you touch my hair so much?"  
  
Dorian shifted, drawing Fenris to look up at him. "All this time and you've never asked me that. I like your hair amatus. I've never felt anything so wonderfully soft before. It's like down feathers, I find it marvellous and it's something I'm deeply grateful you allow me to do."  
  
"Oh." He replied, unsure what to say in response to that.  
  
Dorian leaned up and pressed a kiss to his forehead. "As much as I would very much enjoy remaining here with you in my arms we should get back."  
  
Fenris nodded, placing a tender kiss to Dorian's lips as he rose up and snagged a cloth to clean them up with. "You're right. I think we should speak to the Inquisitor as soon as we reach Skyhold."  
  
They had almost reached the courtyard when Dorian paused, Fenris turning to look at him in puzzlement.  
  
"Something wrong?" He asked.  
  
"I can't believe I forgot to look at your tattoo again."  
  
"You want to do that now?"  
  
"No, of course not. But after we speak to the Inquisitor we should pay a visit to Dagna."  
  
Fenris nodded. "I agree. I am anxious to know what sort of enchantment she placed on me."

 

**Author's Note:**

> I love hearing from readers. Don't be shy! =) Kudos let me know real peeps are reading this... just fyi from a writer who writes a lot
> 
>  
> 
> [On Temporary Hiatus]


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